How many of your Facebook "Friends" are dead?

Snickers Man

Seriously?

I now have three "Friends" who are no longer with us but whose online presences linger as memorials from their loved ones. One of these people only died last week, a relative who was in his early 70s and died after a long illness.

The other two were former workmates who both died young, in their 30s and 40s through cancer and a road accident respectively.

Friends and relatives, especially their children, continue to post sporadically to their pages, telling them how much they miss them, how they still think of them and recognising the anniversaries of major life events, weddings, birthdays and of course theiir days of passing.

This may seem a little weird to people who grew up before the era of the internet. But I actually find it, at least in the cases of the people I know, very respectful and moving. It's the Internet Age's equivalent of lighting a candle in a church in memory of somebody departed.

Naturally, it is a much less private commemoration but then privacy is one of the great victims of our age. And it is possible that as time progresses and more and more users of social media shuffle of this mortal coil, the standard of these commemorations could get dreadfully mawkish and tawdry.

But nevertheless I will continue to drop in occasionally on my old departed friends whose vibrant young faces still beam from their home pages, just to be reminded of them and of what they meant to other people less reticent than I about posting their feelings for all to see.

Have any of you had similar experiences with online friends whose presence is now eternally virtual? What do you think of social media as a shrine to departed loved ones?

uch

They are all Dead to Me !

Adamantium

uch wrote: »

They are all Dead to Me !

Or your dead to them? :pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQoRXhS7vlU

Hande hoche!

None to the best of my knowledge.

dark crystal

None of them, thank goodness.

celticcrash

Get a life.

Obliq

Snickers Man wrote: »

Have any of you had similar experiences with online friends whose presence is now eternally virtual? What do you think of social media as a shrine to departed loved ones?

This is going to sound a little harsh/cold maybe, but I de-friended my departed friend, alongside everyone else on my friends list last year. I have gone back to fb since, but in a much smaller way, re-friending only some. I'd find it a little odd to "friend" him again since it would be someone else accepting/rejecting the request. I'd rather remember him the way I remember others of my friends and family who died, but left no active face book account but I can see that it works as a memorial alright.

Pumpkinseeds

I've no idea, they are strangers who may not even be who they say they are.

kumate_champ07

I searched for a friend on facebook a few years ago, found her facebook page and she had died a few weeks earlier
it was suicide, another friend had commited suicide a few weeks before, his page still gets lots of comments and old photos are posted, think its a good thing, keeps the memory alive and allows mutual friends to get some comfort knowing they arent forgoten

jester77

Let me ask and see how many don't reply.

Alf. A. Male

OP, I'm sure you're very nice and all, but I hope we never become friends, 'cos you seem to be a jinx.

arybvtcw0eolkf

Thankfully just one, died only a few weeks back.

Here's a video clip of his funeral.. Most of my friends are bikers, Paul was a biker and got a bike hearse to bring him on his final ride..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl7YukrPVwY

The recording was made by the pillion on the back of my bike.

soap1978

i see dead people on facebook
but i think its great for the family and friends and to see the last words they wrote on facebook makes it very sad as well

branie

Thankfully none

Specialun

did they check in when they went to heaven? If not then it's proof it doesnt exist

lertsnim

I have a few. It's nice to be able to go onto their pages and look at photos from time to time.

goz83

I see dead people

Dravokivich

2.

One as a result of a motorcycle accident, the other a suicide.

SeanW

One. So far ...

mrsbyrne

An aqaintance of mine obsessively follows all the "Missing" posts on Facebook as in "please share this pic of Mary/Joe Bloggs who has been missing since...." and if they have a Facebook page he spends hours poreing over it gleaning all the personal info he can until it almost seems as if he knows them.
When they, almost inevitably it seems, sadly are found to have died by suicide he's totally spooked out for a few days until the next one crops up.
If my family member were missing i think i would be further upset if i thought ghouls like this were stalking he or she around the internet. he cant be the only one who does this.

Dr. Bre

if your not on fbook ya mite aswell be dead

One. He died suddenly a number of years ago at 25. The thing is, he is asleep in his profile picture which is a bit unsettling.

My dad was an active Facebook and Twitter user. He was a fairly active internet user in general up until his final weeks. A day or two after his death I deleted every trace of him off the net. A much as I could anyway, including his browser history :P

Don't like the idea of people still present online after they pass

wendell borton

On a existential level they're all dead to me.:cool:

Sulla Felix

I don't like it or do it, but if it works for some people, let them on. For me grief is a private thing. I get quite uncomfortable when people want to talk to me about someone dead that we mutually know. I've a few mementoes and my memories, I don't like rehashing things though.

thegreatgonzo

One. He was murdered a few months ago. I haven't looked at the page since that week.

Snickers Man

Alf. A. Male wrote: »

OP, I'm sure you're very nice and all, but I hope we never become friends, 'cos you seem to be a jinx.

Don't worry.

Three dead out of the simply dozens of online friends I have is a small proportion. I'm a very popular man.

Call Me Jimmy

wendell borton wrote: »

On a existential level they're all dead to me.:cool:

or at least feigning life?

donegal__road

thegreatgonzo wrote: »

One. He was murdered a few months ago. I haven't looked at the page since that week.

cripes... how was he murdered?

thegreatgonzo

donegal__road wrote: »

cripes... how was he murdered?

He was stabbed. He was a good friend of my brother's and I knew him for several years but wouldn't have seen him for a long time. It was weird because I was telling a story about something funny he did once to another friend. The next day I found out he had been killed around the same time I was telling the story. Even though I didn't know him that well I couldn't stop thinking about what a horrible horrible thing it is to take away someone's life and how it happens all the time and we hardly even notice.

Cee-Jay-Cee

I only 'friend' dead people. There's a lot less ****e in my news feed and no one ever argues with me. It's better that way.

Muise...

One. Those of us who loved her defriended her because we couldn't stand the gushing posts from others, as if her death merited a tournament of grief between divas.