How would u feel.????

smoking_kills

So I have been looking for a new job for a while. Finally found one and I applied. I told a few people obviously and told a few mates in work. One asked for the link and some details.

Anyway long story short, he applied for the job as well. There is only one position, but the money is excellent and a lot more than we are on now.

So I am pissed, but interested what u guys think.

Is it fair game.
Would u do it to a mate.

Uriel.

Honestly I think it's fair game. Why wouldn't it be? Why is this chap more of threat than any other potential applicants?

With interviews/job applications it's largely about selling yourself as the best candidate. While the more competition there is the greater the chance that someone else will sell themselves better.

But would you be annoyed if someone you know applied for the job, without you having to making them aware of it.

Personally I think it would be a petty thing to hold a grudge on this one. Best solution in the future is to keep these things to yourself.

I'd certainly be keeping this things away from my current job, it's not very sensible telling people in your job that you are actively applying for other positions

syklops

Next time don't tell anyone you have applied for something until you get it.

hfallada

If you are the better candidate for the job, you will get it. It doesnt make a difference if your co-worker gets it as you probably didnt have the skills necessary for the job.

FunLover18

"Asked for a link and details"

Did you give them to him?

It's fair game. I would be annoyed if a friend got a job ahead of me but I wouldn't hold it against them, especially if I had told them about the position.

Chattastrophe!

If it's just "one of the lads in work" ... then hell ya, it's fair game.

If you're very extremely close to him, as in bestest of mates, then I'd say maybe he should have mentioned it to you before applying.

Honestly I think you might be being a wee bit bitter!

smoking_kills

Chattastrophe! wrote: »

If it's just "one of the lads in work" ... then hell ya, it's fair game.

If you're very extremely close to him, as in bestest of mates, then I'd say maybe he should have mentioned it to you before applying.

Honestly I think you might be being a wee bit bitter!

He was at my wedding...

AnonoBoy

You both work in the same field obviously so surely this was bound to happen at some point. If you didn't want him applying you should have stalled on sending him the details.

You gave him the details, in his mind that was saying it was fine for him to apply for it.

You can't blame him (or if you do you'd appear pretty petty about it).

If you're better for the job then you'll get it surely.

whupdedo

smoking_kills wrote: »

He was at my wedding...

So that would exclude everyone that was at your wedding from applying for the same job you apply for.

smoking_kills

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You both work in the same field obviously so surely this was bound to happen at some point. If you didn't want him applying you should have stalled on sending him the details.

You gave him the details, in his mind that was saying it was fine for him to apply for it.

You can't blame him (or if you do you'd appear pretty petty about it).

If you're better for the job then you'll get it surely.

So if a good mate...someone u go for pints with regularly. Was at ur wedding and so on. Applied for a job u told them about in confidence and he knew u were obviously excited about the prospect. You u be ok with that. Well ur a better man than me. And I am not being fecicus in saying that

loubeelou

I think he's a bit of an arse to be honest.
I would never do it to any of my friends and would not trust anyone who would do it to me.
Just not a cool thing to do!!

smoking_kills

whupdedo wrote: »

So that would exclude everyone that was at your wedding from applying for the same job you apply for.

There were 2 ppl at my wedding who had the skill set. Me and him.

smoking_kills

loubeelou wrote: »

I think he's a bit of an arse to be honest.
I would never do it to any of my friends and would not trust anyone who would do it to me.
Just not a cool thing to do!!

Thats the way I thought about it. Hence I told him.

If I am being an arse then fair enough. But I am not convinced

baby and crumble

I don't understand the problem. If you didn't want anyone you know to apply for the job, then don't blab about it in work, where there will obviously be people with the same skills as you.

I actually think this is very petty. In the past I've actually told me friends about jobs that I was going for so that they could apply too. I figure that if I'm going to get it and be good at it then I'll get it- and I certainly wouldn't hold it against anyone if they got a job ahead of me- actually, I have been in this situation (in that a friend from work got a job I was interested in and applied for) and it's not an issue.

loubeelou

Yeah.. I don't think you the one who's in the wrong here.
And for what its worth, i don't think anyone else here would appreciate a 'friend' pulling the same stunt on them

token101

smoking_kills wrote: »

Thats the way I thought about it. Hence I told him.

If I am being an arse then fair enough. But I am not convinced

There aren't exactly an abundance of jobs going so he's got every right to go for it. If you're better for the role, you'll get it, if not, well you won't, regardless of whether he applied or not.

smoking_kills

token101 wrote: »

There aren't exactly an abundance of jobs going so he's got every right to go for it. If you're better for the role, you'll get it, if not, well you won't, regardless of whether he applied or not.

There is in my sector.

And the issue is not who will/wont get the job.

The issue is was him applying for it knowing I had right.
Is that something you would be ok with if it was done to you by a really good friend?

brinty

smoking_kills wrote: »

There is in my sector.

And the issue is not who will/wont get the job.

The issue is was him applying for it knowing I had right.
Is that something you would be ok with if it was done to you by a really good friend?

Tis fair game in my eyes

The lesson is never let anyone ye work with know your intentions.

I had a girl I worked with last summer (we were both on contract roles) going for the same job as me, neither of us got it though. We only found out after we were both rejected for it.

winston82

smoking_kills wrote: »

So if a good mate...someone u go for pints with regularly. Was at ur wedding and so on. Applied for a job u told them about in confidence and he knew u were obviously excited about the prospect. You u be ok with that. Well ur a better man than me. And I am not being fecicus in saying that

I'd be thinking along the same lines. I'd be pissed of at the fact that he went for it and super pissed if he got it. It's not fair game, IMO.

smoking_kills

brinty wrote: »

Tis fair game in my eyes

The lesson is never let anyone ye work with know your intentions.

I had a girl I worked with last summer (we were both on contract roles) going for the same job as me, neither of us got it though. We only found out after we were both rejected for it.

Thats different. By the sounds of things neither of ye knew.

And if the lesson is never tell anyone your intentions, what the point in having friends? If you cant trust them that is ????

smoking_kills

winston82 wrote: »

I'd be thinking along the same lines. I'd be pissed of at the fact that he went for it and super pissed if he got it. It's not fair game, IMO.

Thats what I thought, but apparently we are in the minority :eek:

tim3000

I think its a bit of a d""k move to be honest. If the OP told him about it in confidence then he has no right to act on it. It would be different if he had stumbled across it himself but that is not how it transpired. If he gets it over you you will always resent him over it and so would most people.

brinty

smoking_kills wrote: »

Thats different. By the sounds of things neither of ye knew.

And if the lesson is never tell anyone your intentions, what the point in having friends? If you cant trust them that is ????

Dude, when it comes to money (I think ye mentioned that) friends can and will fcuk ye over on it. Never and I emphasis never tell someone your plans until you have them wrapped up and signed off
And don't ever discuss a new job at your workplace with other colleagues...social engineers are everywhere.. you're manager could now be aware your on the move

smoking_kills

smoking_kills wrote: »

There is in my sector.

And the issue is not who will/wont get the job.

The issue is was him applying for it knowing I had right.
Is that something you would be ok with if it was done to you by a really good friend?

It doesn't really matter how anyone else would feel about it all. You feel how you feel, you can't help that. I completely understand that it stings, even if he was entitled to apply too. The fact you told him confidentially would be the sticking point.

Only you know if you can get past this and preserve your friendship. I think it'd be much easier to let go if you get it, or neither of you. It wasn't the most diplomatic thing for him to do, but maybe he values the friendship less than you do and considered it worth the fallout. That would be a sting too.

Good luck with your application OP.

smoking_kills

brinty wrote: »

Dude, when it comes to money (I think ye mentioned that) friends can and will fcuk ye over on it. Never and I emphasis never tell someone your plans until you have them wrapped up and signed off
And don't ever discuss a new job at your workplace with other colleagues...social engineers are everywhere.. you're manager could now be aware your on the move

Come on, I know that. I told him and anther mate.
And if friends fcuk you over for money, they not really friends are they. So i would rather know, wouldn't you?

It doesn't really matter how anyone else would feel about it all. You feel how you feel, you can't help that. I completely understand that it stings, even if he was entitled to apply too. The fact you told him confidentially would be the sticking point.

Only you know if you can get past this and preserve your friendship. I think it'd be much easier to let go if you get it, or neither of you. It wasn't the most diplomatic thing for him to do, but maybe he values the friendship less than you do and considered it worth the fallout. That would be a sting too.

Good luck with your application OP.

Thanks Candy,

but i think brinty may be right and its about the money. Jesus who needs enemies..

TokenWhite

Admittedly it's not right that a friend applied to a job knowing that you had your heart set on it, but at the same time, it's not fair that you should expect your friends not to apply for a job that they may be equally interested in just because of your relationship with them. It's not exactly a great job market out there, maybe he feels that this will be the only decent opportunity to raise it's head in the foreseeable future. Wouldn't do it myself but don't think I'd begrudge a mate if he did it to me. It would depend on my circumstances though. If I was living on the breadline and needed the extra cash, I'd obviously feel differently.

the_syco

smoking_kills wrote: »

So I have been looking for a new job for a while. Finally found one and I applied.

Until you get it, you tell no one.

NO ONE

Until you have it. Otherwise, you risk either losing it, or getting passed over for promotion as the boss thinks you don't plan on sticking around.

smoking_kills

TokenWhite wrote: »

Admittedly it's not right that a friend applied to a job knowing that you had your heart set on it, but at the same time, it's not fair that you should expect your friends not to apply for a job that they may be equally interested in just because of your relationship with them. It's not exactly a great job market out there, maybe he feels that this will be the only decent opportunity to raise it's head in the foreseeable future. Wouldn't do it myself but don't think I'd begrudge a mate if he did it to me. It would depend on my circumstances though. If I was living on the breadline and needed the extra cash, I'd obviously feel differently.

So if you found a house and had your heart set on it, told a friend and they started bidding on it, because the housing market is not great now, you would be ok with that?

No i wouldn't dream of doing it either.

sawdoubters

can I apply

smoking_kills

sawdoubters wrote: »

can I apply

Might as well, every other fu**er i told did

paddyh117

I think it's a d1ck move, and would have no respect for anyone that did this

yea of course you shouldn't have told anyone etc etc blah blah, but who would honestly think that someone would do that?

its not "all fair game"....... if they happened to be going for the same job it is, but not if the person only found out by you telling them - that removes the "fair game" part!

it's wrong but hopefully you'll get it and never have to speak to that person again!