Do you have a stoner ruining your life?

david75

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

FearDark

Nope. I know plenty of alcoholics ruining other peoples lives though.

shopaholic01

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

Leave him, it's unlikely you'd regret it.

dark crystal

Why don't you just break up with him if he's that bad?

david75

Would if I didn't need him for his half of the rent.

EuskalHerria

There's every chance him/her being a stoner is irrelevant. Sounds like a lazy ba$tard.

david75

EuskalHerria wrote: »

There's every chance him/her being a stoner is irrelevant. Sounds like a lazy ba$tard.

Not when it suits him. That's the sad part.

dark crystal

david75 wrote: »

Would if I didn't need him for his half of the rent.

Advertise for a new room mate.

Sauve

david75 wrote: »

Would if I didn't need him for his half of the rent.

Stop using somebody who's clearly not the right guy for you.
Leave him, sort out alternative living arrangements, and move on with your life.

systemicrisk

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

Eh simples if you are that unhappy leave him. Many stoners are so averse to change that it might take losing you (or at least the threat thereof) to force him to change.

Boombastic

Tbh, he just sounds like a lazy, selfish pr#£k

Ah, I see you need him for half the rent, that makes you a prostitute...sorry

krudler

Dump him, problem solved

AerynSun

david75 wrote: »

He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

I'm so sorry he let you down that way. You deserved better: you deserved support and care through a difficult time. I hope you're doing okay.

syklops

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

There is no way to make him change if he doesn't want to. You have to make the change.

Leave him. Now.

MadsL

Ain't the weed, he was like that anyway.

Femme_Fatale

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

Have you had a proper, laying-down-the law chat with him? I understand your frustration at him, but saying you won't break up with him because of the rent looks user-ish and kinda cowardly tbh.
If you're not going to finish with him, then what can people advise you other than having that chat with him?

david75

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

Have you had a proper, laying-down-the law chat with him? I understand your frustration at him, but saying you won't break up with him because of the rent looks user-ish and kinda cowardly tbh.
If you're not going to finish with him, then what can people advise you other than having that chat with him?

So many times. To no avail. My friend said to me the other day 'if you put up with it, it'll continue'
Need to snap out of it. I've had enough.

Napper Hawkins

I have a strong suspicion he was a selfish, lazy asshole before he discovered weed.

david75

Do we have a record for least AH type responses to an AH thread?
I expected this to make me laugh:)

FearDark

It's not weed, he's just an ass.

catallus

OP you need to watch a documentary called "Reefer Madness", it will open your eyes and change your life.

How can you let this hedonist destroy your sense of well being?

syklops

MadsL wrote: »

Ain't the weed, he was like that anyway.

I bet he's well able to get off the couch when he is running low on blow.

Weed might make you lazy, but the selfishness was there first.

AerynSun

david75 wrote: »

Do we have a record for least AH type responses to an AH thread?
I expected this to make me laugh:)

We can do jokes if you want jokes?

Only went the sincere route because your post sounded so sad. Sorry *hugs*

Ok... jokes. Jokes. Monkey jokes, maybe?

david75

syklops wrote: »

I bet he's well able to get off the couch when he is running low on blow.

Weed might make you lazy, but the selfishness was there first.

It gets delivered. To our door. I'm not joking. By my mates husband. So it's a minefield cos I'm resenting them for supplying him. No holidays. **** furniture. No nights out. Nothing. My mates he all his disposable income basically.
It's festering in my head.

syklops

david75 wrote: »

Do we have a record for least AH type responses to an AH thread?
I expected this to make me laugh:)

Two stoners walk into a bar. The first one goes "Dude we just walked into a bar" and the other one goes "I bet if i wasn't so baked that would have hurt." It was an iron bar.

Better?

Have you kicked him out yet?

Mr. CooL ICE

Burn his house down.

Oh, wait...

cruais

AerynSun wrote: »

We can do jokes if you want jokes?

Only went the sincere route because your post sounded so sad. Sorry *hugs*

Ok... jokes. Jokes. Monkey jokes, maybe?

How do you know you're a true stoner?
When you're bong gets washed more than you're dishes.

Ihatecuddles

Sounds like my ex I had to pay him to go to his own sons christening.

He started getting violent and beating me, I left him and have the perfect life now. Im with someone who Im madly in love with, he treats me like a princess, not by buying me material things...just by being there for me, especially with my depression.

Move on, you wont regret it. The longer youre with him the more it will affect you long term.

sully2010

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

My OH would kick me out the door if I didn't clean up after myself or socialize with her and shes damn right. Whats the point otherwise?

Try it, start laying down the law and stand up for yourself and you will see how much of a man he is then;)

david75

Thanks folks. I'd leave right now except I love this house and put so much work into it. Getting him to leave is the tricky bit. We've come close but there's usually a last minute reprieve.
I probably just have to move. Or at least be seen to look

I dont Wash Myself

Hes not a stoner hes a weed connoisseur

Davarus Walrus

He's dependent on a drug. One that sucks the vim, pep and soul out of regular users. What makes it all the more tragic is that stoners believe that their choice of drug is somehow a harmless one. 'But no one ever has died from smoking weed' is one of the good ones. Neither has LSD. They argue for the virtues of their vice with all the indignation of a bible basher.

Stoners are the most lucid argument against the legalisation of that most nefarious and subtly sinister of drugs.

ardle1

Are you in a gay relationship(your user name),, or did you just put no thought into it .. Now my post is funny innit!... oh btw leave him, it's then he will realise he's taking you for granted.. Now that doesn't mean you'll go back to him! I still miss her sniffle sniffle. ........ Yes even though when she left me, I realised I had taken my X for granted, she never came back But I have changed! Really....

Thoie

david75 wrote: »

Thanks folks. I'd leave right now except I love this house and put so much work into it. Getting him to leave is the tricky bit. We've come close but there's usually a last minute reprieve.
I probably just have to move. Or at least be seen to look

It's a house - you can do it all again. Your sanity is harder to reclaim. If you end up beating the lazy sod to death with the dirty dishes it'll be harder again.

Look for a houseshare, or else somewhere you can afford to rent on your own, then walk out.

david75

Thoie wrote: »

It's a house - you can do it all again. Your sanity is harder to reclaim. If you end up beating the lazy sod to death with the dirty dishes it'll be harder again.

Look for a houseshare, or else somewhere you can afford to rent on your own, then walk out.

That's looking most likely. There is also the dog to consider. If he goes he'll just palm the dog off on his ma. Yet insists its his dog. I do all the walking feeding vet stuff cleaning up dogs poo, everything. And I mean everything. Ugh

Pain in my balls with this. Sorry for whinging

handbagmad

A house is only bricks and mortar. From the sounds of it you're second choice to his weed. By you staying there you are enabling him to continue.
either make the decision you go or he goes. You can keep making excuses all you like but will things change?
It will be hard but in time life will be so much better. ;-)

handbagmad

Davarus Walrus wrote: »

He's dependent on a drug. One that sucks the vim, pep and soul out of regular users. What makes it all the more tragic is that stoners believe that their choice of drug is somehow a harmless one. 'But no one ever has died from smoking weed' is one of the good ones. Neither has LSD. They argue for the virtues of their vice with all the indignation of a bible basher.

Stoners are the most lucid argument against the legalisation of that most nefarious and subtly sinister of drugs.

very TRUE. I've seen many relationships and people destroyed by dependance on that horrible ****e.
Not so harmless as some folk would think

markesmith

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8g3XXLTUpo

Thoie

david75 wrote: »

That's looking most likely. There is also the dog to consider. If he goes he'll just palm the dog off on his ma. Yet insists its his dog. I do all the walking feeding vet stuff cleaning up dogs poo, everything. And I mean everything. Ugh

Pain in my balls with this. Sorry for whinging

Whinge away, it's a trying situation. Just make sure when you leave that you've made some arrangements for the dog. Don't trust a stoner to sort it out. If the house falls down around his ears, that's one thing, but don't leave the poor dog in that kind of situation.

david75

I'm of the opinion tht it's beyond insidious as a drug.
It's worse than heroin. At least junkies get up and do their thing, even if that means crime or whatever.
Stoners. They don't seem to even be able to do the simplest thing. For themselves or anyone else.

superglue

My flat mate is ruining my life. Smoked all my weed last night, the feckin' stoner.

Davarus Walrus

handbagmad wrote: »

very TRUE. I've seen many relationships and people destroyed by dependance on that horrible ****e.
Not so harmless as some folk would think

It's the dirtiest and most soul destroying drug for regular users. Most stoners used to go on about it being non addictive. But always felt the need to have it. The people who couldn't seperate the occasional from the twice weekly. And then the daily.

It's a real nasty one. It ruins good people. But it's almost seen as being socially acceptable. :-(

sabat

The man's decided to pass his time on the planet being stoned and that's his decision whereas you're the one on morally thin ice here seeing as you're only staying with him for monetary reasons. And why is everyone so down on the weed in this scenario? It's not her fault she's so awesome...

jigglypuffstuff

Boombastic wrote: »

Tbh, he just sounds like a lazy, selfish pr#£k

Ah, I see you need him for half the rent, that makes you a prostitute...sorry

david75 wrote: »

My OH is the most unmotivated selfish life sucking waster I've ever met. I'll be done for murder eventually. Can't do the simplest thing like cleaning up after himself. And any important stuff like funerals/weddings, lets me down every time. He didn't even come to my ma's funeral.

Anyone else got this problem and anyone got any ideas how to scrape this Sh!t off or at least make things change?

Tag team OP??

I'll do the murdering

you do the cleaning up?

Boombastic

sabat wrote: »

The man's decided to pass his time on the planet being stoned and that's his decision whereas you're the one on morally thin ice here seeing as you're only stating with him for monetary reasons. And why is everyone so down on the weed in this scenario? It's not her fault she's so awesome...

Oh no, but stoners can't do anything for themselves, even worse is someone who depends on one to pay their rent, because the are not a stoner and can do so much for themselves, especially make excuses as to why they couldn't leave the stoner

The irony in this thread is strong

stpaddy99

I do and he costs me time and money, but liberals tell me not to judge and im at fault for not forgiving him and accepting the way he is......it sounda like Christianity, but these same people hate Jesus and tear down Christianity every chance they get?

david75

Seems to be a really divisive topic. Never was able to stomach regular users patronising and condescending of anyone who speaks out against it though. They're usually the most vociferous.

david75

Just realising it.
I'm enabling. If there's no toilet paper, I buy it. If the electric toothbrushes are dead after him using them, I plug them in. Yadda yadda etc

zenno

And Slowly, And Surely, They Drew Their Plans Against us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tl2X4Ipm9oI

riffmongous

zenno wrote: »

And Slowly, And Surely, They Drew Their Plans Against us.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tl2X4Ipm9oI

Damn it you missed the best part of the whole thing!

sawdoubters

its a gray area this problem