'Embracing minority status ' vrs not becoming part of the gay community.. A MUST SEE

Annasopra

Folks

I think the discusion on condescendion is very off topic.

bodice ripper

With respect, I disagree. I believe it is at the heart of the matter. To draw conclusions about the motives of others who you have never even met, nor are involved in the conversation, is condescending.

Annasopra

Ok folks as a mod I am asking people to move on from the issue of condescension. It's not particularly on topic and it seems to be getting heckles up. Also can I ask all contributors to refrain from any further personal attacks

bodice ripper

Well, I have nothing I can contribute. Have fun.

Ambersky

All that being part of a minority group means is that you have a physical, mental, social or maybe even spiritual difference from the majority of people in the area where you live or socialise that is not unique to you and that you share with a minority of other people .

LGBT people are not the only ones who can have some difficulty about belonging to or seeing themselves as part of a minority group, lots of other people struggle with this particularly when their difference is not instantly visible or when a difference is acquired or noticed in the teenage years or even later.
When a difference is immediately visible as is the case with colour, race sometimes, wheelchair use, etc, the person does not have to decide when or when not to declare their difference, the difference from the majority of people is instantly visible and they will sometimes get reactions and assumptions made about them because of it.
When a person’s difference from the majority is not immediately visible as can be the case with religion, sexual orientation, a sight or hearing loss, etc, people can find they have a choice about when, or if, they will declare their difference. Sometimes those decisions can take the form of deciding to actively hide or not hide a difference.

I know people who are blind and who would rather risk their lives crossing a busy city road that has no pedestrian lights without a white cane, than carry a cane and open themselves up to the possibility of other people knowing they are blind and maybe treating them differently.
I know people who have a hearing loss and would rather pretend they can hear conversations, the television, the doorbell, social welfare officers etc. than wear a hearing aid.
I know people who would rather live in a pretend marriage with an opposite sex partner or never have a relationship than let anyone know they are attracted to the same sex.

LGBT people sometimes have little or no experience of being part of a minority group up until they realise that they might be different to the heterosexual majority.
Sometimes the majority of people they know are inclusive of this difference and sometimes they are not, but the individual usually has to take the risk at some point and find out by becoming public about themselves.
Even when the majority are inclusive there can still be advantages to meeting up with others who have a difference similar to yourself or other people who belong to the same minority group as you do.
That’s all the video is about really, is talking about some peoples reluctance to go along to LGBT events because they don’t want to acknowledge that they are part of a minority group and how relaxing about that can mean, again for some people, that they can make some good contacts friends partners they wouldn’t otherwise have met.

Lou.m

poundapunnet wrote: »

Yeah I see how it could come across that way, tbh, I'm just saying that LGBT isn't a category I feel like I fit into more than a lot of other categories, and I'm in a good position to be able to say that. Sure I like to post on boards like these, I like hanging out with my lesbian friends, I read sites like autostraddle, it's just not something I think about very much. And that's thanks to things I have no control over, I very rarely have to think about the fact that I'm gay.



when I was younger, meeting and dating people would have been a bigger priority, and I interacted with the LGBT community in my city a bit more. But I found that I had no more in common with them than the film-loving community, the weed smoking community, the feminist community, the animal community, the vegetarian community. You have that one thing in common with them and nothing guaranteed beyond that. And the older I get, the less I'm bothered (I'm 24 btw). I've had two girlfriends, several random shags or f-buddies, I met them either through gaydargirls or just by going about my life and taking the risk of getting rejected. It works for me, and that's as far as my authority to comment on the situation extends, like I say, not judging anyone else.



See, I wouldn't get into a "white people film lovers" group, or a "right handed vegetarians" group, just like I wouldn't get into a "LGBT hill-walking" group. If I'm specifically looking for a girlfriend, which I rarely am, I go to online dating sites; and if I'm looking for a hook-up I've been around hippie party scenes for most of my life where you can go somewhere that's not specifically LGBT and get lucky easily.

It's not that I DON'T identify with being LGBT, it's not that I wouldn't tell anyone that I'm gay.

I dunno. Interesting thread anyway, it's made me think about my attitudes.

Fair nuff each to their own it is great it made US BOTH THINK
HUGS cuz this thread got a bit shouty and I like to bring the positive stuff so sorry to all in this thread and who read it. If I started **** I am sorry about that.

I just had some thoughts that I felt were interesting :-)

Ambersky

Well speaking for myself the video and the Op were and are very interesting Lou.m .
Positive stuff can come out of differences in opinion, like you say if it makes you think thats a good thing.