Ever have one of those "Oh, that was close moments"

McIrish_

Mine goes as follows,
This morning my alarm went off. My phone, a brand new Iphone 5s, started vibrating on the table when the alarm sounds. The vibration made the phone move. So it fell off the table, and almost fell into my glass of water, which was on the ground. It literally tipped down the side of the glass.

I said to myself "God, that was close" :-)

humbert

I came within inches of being hospitalised by some clown throwing open a car door earlier but I didn't have an iPhone 5s anywhere on my person so the risk was minimal.

homemadecider

Once something happened to me, but I didn't have a brand new iPhone 5, so it didn't matter.

Muise...

I survived a house fire in the middle of the night, but I didn't have an iPhone to rescue - just the neighbours and a cat.

SV

GF was 3 weeks late.

ScummyMan

Thinly veiled I have an iPhone 5s thread.

Gongoozler

Had a dream I didn't have an iPhone, woke up and realised it was true.
So close. Phew

Frosty McSnowballs

I had a dream that I had an iPhone 3

I nearly **** my fancy pants

SCOOP 64

I wish it was a bucket of water.

antodeco

I remember, in Nam, the enemy had us boxed in. Flares alight for air support. A wind blowing across and the rain soaking you in an instant. The choppers came in, in a hot zone, so landed on the other side of the area we had secured. Myself, Jackie. Laybomb and Geezer were left pondering how to get to the choppers. Geezer and Jackie went first, Geezer took a bullet in the leg but reached the chopper. Jackie was ok. Laybomb ran bit took one to the hip. He fell but managed to pull himself to the chopper. That left me. Under what now appeared to be constant gunfire, I made a dash for it. Bullets whizzing by, my feet splashing in the grasses. Bang. Took one to the thigh. Bang. One to the hip. Bang. One in to my left lung. Bang left arm. I fell against the chopper and managed to get lifted out. In was bleeding heavily. My jacket thorn to shreds and blood everywhere. Looking down at my jacket I saw my top pocket ripped. Fearing the worst I felt around. Blood pouring into my hand like a tap. My iPhone 5 was still there. I thought "God, that was close".

Tangatagamadda Chaddabinga Bonga Bungo

A nine-year old Chinese girl was playing in Songjian near Shanghai, in July 1992 when she was carried off by a whirlwind and deposited unhurt in a treetop almost two miles away. According to a wire report from May 1986, a freak wind lifted up 13 children in the oasis of Hami in Western China and deposited them unharmed in sand dunes and scrub 12 miles away. This was all well documented using my excellent iSight camera with a larger 8MP sensor on an iPhone 5s.

The One Who Knocks

....I thought she was gonna wake up, but nope, just rolled over. Phew!


..then the b*tch nearly squished my new 5S, close one!

NuckingFacker

The missus bought me an iPhone 5 when my samsung flip broke last friday - I rushed to bring it back and only got to the shop at 4.55- luckily they were still open and I exchanged it for another samsung flip dumb phone, but it was close. Another 5 minutes....

barone

a few farts have felt that way

anncoates

Stupidly went on to a main road on my bike when I was about 10 and a car had to literally had to skid around me to avoid hitting me. The car literally skinned me. Thank fuck they didn't crash into anybody else. I distinctly member the guy getting out of the car and telling me off and being freaked out.

Daqster

anncoates wrote: »

Stupidly went on to a main road on my bike when I was about 10 and a car had to literally had to skid around me to avoid hitting me. The car literally skinned me. Thank fuck they didn't crash into anybody else. I distinctly member the guy getting out of the car and telling me off and being freaked out.

What's that got to do with an iPhone5?

Howard Juneau

anncoates wrote: »

Stupidly went on to a main road on my bike when I was about 10 and a car had to literally had to skid around me to avoid hitting me. The car literally skinned me. Thank fuck they didn't crash into anybody else. I distinctly member the guy getting out of the car and telling me off and being freaked out.

Anyone video it on the original iPhone?

namloc1980

Recently I was considering buying a new phone, a brand new iPhone 5s, but then I came to my senses...phew that was close.

Tin Foil Hat

I once almost ordered an iphone, but came to my senses just in time and got a HTC instead. So close. I still break into sweats when I think about it


I need a drink.


Edit: damn you namloc.

anncoates

Daqster wrote: »

What's that got to do with an iPhone5?

Howard Juneau wrote: »

Anyone video it on the original iPhone?

It was so obviously a dense metaphor based on the slim temporarily of existence vis a vis near-traffic accidents versus the relativity slim body of the 5 model compared to the legacy models of course.






OK I only read the thread title. /logs off

Joe prim

Waking quite late at night,on one occasion, I groped in the dark for my iPhone 5g, thinking that it was quite far away. Imagine my surprise and gratification when I realised that it was in fact quite close. "Oh, that was close " I thought. It was clearly one of those "Oh,that was close" moments

DeadHand

I landed a job working on a trawler operating out of one of the Aleutian Islands. One morning, just north of Spruce Island, our ship hit an ice burg and sank within minutes. Most of the mainly Aleut crew drowned or froze to death in the Arctic waters. I managed to struggle to a tiny, rocky, uninhabited Island along with two of my shipmates.

Here we existed on a diet of tinned pineapple and crabs, drinking rainwater from the many puddles of our barren prison. We slowly became insane. One night, Samo (one of my shipmates) attempted to stab me to death with our can opener. I had to beat him to death with his own boots. Tamo (the other) suffered a fit, leapt into the sea and swam East, bellowing out the chorus of 'Sean South from Garryowen' as he paddled. That was the last I ever saw of him.

IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE.

I survived the remaining period of time there by feasting on the remains of my dead friend, Samo. My "salvation" came in the form of a Russian frigate on maneuvers in the area. Little did I know, this wasn't the end of my ordeal. I was press ganged into the Russian navy and had many adventures skirmishing with Somali pirates, exchanging fire with the North Korean navy and battling with the fearsome Kraken. Until one night I made good my escape through the back exit of a Mumbai whorehouse.

At this point, I checked my pocket. I dropped to my knees in that tumultuous Indian sidestreet, tears in my eyes, crying up to the indifferent heavens in joy, thanks and sweet relief.

My iPhone 5s was miraculously dry and undamaged. All I remember thinking is; "Oh, that was close moments".

Kylo Ren

It involved a heart pounding adventure climbing Everest that almost cost the lives of 24 people but basically, iPhone 5s.

errlloyd

I'm a straight guy, but there was this one time I got really drunk and headed out to the George with some mates. We were drinking and drinking and drinking and tbh I was beginning to fall about the place a little. Anyway, eventually I get separated from the lads and this guy starts talking to me, he takes me into a corner of the club and leans in to kiss me, and I just move my head away, I said "Sorry man, I know I lead you on, but this really isn't me" he looked at me kinda confused, "but your phone?" he said, "Yeah, it was a mistake"

The next day I returned my Iphone 5s.

mattjack

Mrs Mattjack wanted a bit of sexy time the other night .She started vibratin' , so I threw a glass of water over her .
The following morning I noticed I didnt own an iPhone.
Am I doing this right ?

Dave H

I phoned 5 ex's, could have been a disaster.

rolliepoley

I was running for the toilet, it was a touching cloth moment, but luckily i had my Iphone 5s with me.

johnnyskeleton

What is an iPhone 5s?

Do we eat it?

The One Who Knocks

Dave H wrote: »

I phoned 5 ex's, could have been a disaster.

Why, did your iphone 5s nearly slip out of your hand?

Thoie

This one time, msfksdm sdmf efaij af esk band camp, dsfjsl opwekisd iPhone 5s up my sdflk;osdk, but then I found it, but it was very close.

Mumm_ra

Had a dream ten years from now where iPhone 1464 fell and nearly knocked glass of water - luckily managed to save the water - water tax €3500 at the time

Nippledragon

I was wiping me hole and me finger went through the bog roll and there was a lump of sweetcorn on the tissue and I thought oh that was close.....wait, are we on about iPhones?

Mint Aero

Was taking a selfie for facebook cos I JUST KNOW MY FRIENDS LOVE MY DUCK FACE. However since I'm like so RaNdOM!, this picture remained on my phone for 3 months. In the mean time I bought a new iPhone 5s and before selling my ****ty Samsung (that seemed utterly better in spec but people didn't talk about it as much, hence why I was selling it) I came across the selfie and uploaded it before deleting.

Well, it was a hairy tuesday morning and I was in the scratcher before going to collect the scratcher. I went to my brand new like totes OMFG amazeballs iPhone 5s but luckily I came to my senses and canceled the page load for facebook just in time.

Drove 18 miles to my nearest library. Logged into facebook and deleted the selfie. Went home and made anal love to my iPhone 5s. Like OMFG, you could see the f**cking Samsung in the selfie! What if I had logged in and my iPhone 5s saw that too and it was uploaded after I'd gotten my iPhone 5s! That was a close one, phew!

The Backwards Man

I have a samsung thingy.

The One Who Knocks

Dropped an iPhone C on my floor, completely smashed the screen.

Thankfully the floor was fine, phew close one!

SimonTemplar

I sit near a guy in work who can really only be described as a "crazy bastard". He annoys most people on the team and as a kinda stress relief, other team members occasionally email each other about him to let off steam. A few days ago I wrote a fairly bitchy email about him and when I moved my mouse over "Send" I released I put his name in the To field. Another second and it would have been gone.

wil

Knew a guy who got shot at by a drunken yob. Pointed the gun straight at him as he walked down the street. Luckily he was carrying a new iPhone 5s in his shirt pocket.
.
.
.
Because if it in was in his jeans pocket, the bullet probably wouldn't have severed the femoral artery in his groin and I wouldn't have got this nearly new slightly blooddamaged but otherwise perfect iphone 5s
.
..Didn't really 'appen
.

darlett

barone wrote: »

a few farts have felt that way

Recently I had a bad old dose of diarrhoea, and while out and about I did a fart despite my best efforts. I thought whoa that was close. But unfortunately, closer inspection afterwards revealed I had actually proper shat myself which was disappointing.

Dave H

The One Who Knocks wrote: »

Why, did your iphone 5s nearly slip out of your hand?

Worse, they could have answered

certifiedcrepe

Usually right before the guy collapses on top of me and says "that was great babe".

stoneill

I was in a car that skidded on ice and went up an embankment and flipped over onto it's roof.
Luckily there was no iPhone in the car that could get damaged.

Sunnyisland

A close call :P

I have suspected for some time now that the missus has been cheating.

The usual signs; Phone rings, if I answer the caller hangs up and she’s going out with the girls a lot.

I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home but I usually fall asleep.

Anyway last night about midnight I hid in the shed behind the boat, when she came home she got out of someone's car buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on... It was at that moment crouched behind the boat I noticed... A "hairline crack" in the outboard mounting bracket...

Is that something I can weld myself or do I need to replace it?

foxinsox

realies wrote: »

A close call :P

I have suspected for some time now that the missus has been cheating.

The usual signs; Phone rings, if I answer the caller hangs up and she’s going out with the girls a lot.

I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home but I usually fall asleep.

Anyway last night about midnight I hid in the shed behind the boat, when she came home she got out of someone's car buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on... It was at that moment crouched behind the boat I noticed... A "hairline crack" in the outboard mounting bracket...

Is that something I can weld myself or do I need to replace it?

Have you got an i Phone?

I haven't, but there is an app for welding outboard mounting brackets on it.

;-)

Sunnyisland

foxinsox wrote: »

Have you got an i Phone?

I haven't, but there is an app for welding outboard mounting brackets on it.

;-)

No, just an iPad am I in the gang :D

Howard Juneau

realies wrote: »

No, just an iPad am I in the gang :D

An iPad?! That's! why your missus is playing away from home!

Birneybau

I was nearly turned away from Krystal in Dublin last night. I felt terrible about it but it had to be said: "Don't you know what I own?"

On producing my iPhone 5s I was whisked right to the V.I.P. (very important phone) section, kept well away from the scummy Samsung crowd.

MonstaMash

Frequently...try riding a motorcycle in Dublin with some of the fookwits out there on the roads :mad:

whupdedo

MonstaMash wrote: »

Frequently...try riding a motorcycle in Dublin with some of the fookwits out there on the roads :mad:

That bears absolutely no relevance to this thread about near misses with the iphone 5, unless you had an i phone 5 on the bike with you

krudler

I had a nightmare that I owned an iphone 5 but woke up in a blind panic and reached over to find my iphone 5s resting beside me, I cradled it all night.

MonstaMash

whupdedo wrote: »

That bears absolutely no relevance to this thread about near misses with the iphone 5, unless you had an i phone 5 on the bike with you

Read the title of the thread...Ever have one of those "Oh, that was close moments" :rolleyes:

It seems to have evolved into an iphone 5 thread, Mr. Back-seat moderator :P

whupdedo

MonstaMash wrote: »

Read the title of the thread...Ever have one of those "Oh, that was close moments" :rolleyes:

It seems to have evolved into an iphone 5 thread, Mr. Back-seat moderator :P

The people have voted, its an iphone 5 thread and that's that:D