Lunch, coffee, dinner, nights out... new friends!

Marlboro82

So there comes a time in your early 30's (in my case) when you go to baby showers, christenings,weddings.... and no one is really available to hang out anymore

I feel like a little bit of a loser writing this but I know I cannot be alone!
There must be other ladies in this situation who would like to go shopping or do lunch or go out and have a drink and think for a while that they are a fantastic dancer..

So where does one go to start all over again making friends? It's hard I've looked into this..I'm normal, I'm good craic people should be queuing up to cash in on this opportunity .... they are not!

So where does one go to find herself a little group of fun female buddies?
Btw.. based in Dublin so that has to somewhat provide a bigger catchment area?!

ElleEm

Meetup.com is great, and I have actually just joined a group specific to what you're looking for, (Dublin girls in their early 30's)! There are groups for specialised interests too if you have any!

doctorwhogirl

I'm in twenties and having similar problems. I'm not in Dublin so options are more limited!

Mc Kenzie

Hey there,

I know what you mean. Im in my mid twenties and alot of my friends are in long term relationships or have children or when the find a man they seem to dissapear...Im in Dublin too,,feel free to get in touch if you like

liliq

I'm in my late 20's and while I lived outside of Dublin for a few years a lot of my friends emigrated, so when I moved back there wasn't really anyone left!
I found once I had a baby a whole new group of friends opened up which is nice.
I've also tried to make a point of trying to go to something I'm interested in... I tried a book club but the one I tried felt very clicky so I left after a month or two.
I've been in and out of an old martial arts club and that's been great, there's a great mix of people that socialise together outside of training.

Reine

I didn't see this and just started a post re meet up. Would love some reviews on it. I'm in my mid 40s with adult children so too old for you gals:)

RenatavonB

I'm having similar problems at the moment, I'm 20 and any friends I made in secondary school have gone to different colleges etc. and we don't keep in touch.

The problem is that I don't get along with people my age as well as I get along with people closer to/in their 30s or older as I am more mature and wiser than people my age (I do know how to enjoy myself though) and I find a lot of people that age don't want such young friends. Maybe that's not the case with everyone..?

I seem to always be making friends with people and then it's just me keeping up the contact and nobody ever seems to be trying to keep in contact with me if you get what I mean.

If anyone would like to get to know me and possibly become friends with me then let me know!

kylith

RenatavonB wrote: »

I seem to always be making friends with people and then it's just me keeping up the contact and nobody ever seems to be trying to keep in contact with me if you get what I mean.

I know exactly what you mean. I think it's the difference between people who have a social group and people, like us, who don't really have one. People will call their friends to go out, but they'd rarely think to invite the person they've just met because they think 'Well, she was nice, but she wouldn't want to come out with us; she'll want to hang around with her own friends', without realising that a lot of people don't have that circle due to relocating or just plain falling out of touch with people.

Like one girl I know will invite me to parties at her house, but would never call when she's going out for drinks because she think's I'd be busy on a weekend night and, well, it's hard to tell someone 'No, you are my social life', and you don't want to put pressure on them either.

And Reine, come along to the meetup if you want. Who cares if you might be a bit older, I certainly don't!

Lyra Fangs

Based in Limerick but moving to Dublin in August would love to meet up since I'm moving to a new area and will have no one I know around me.

RenatavonB

kylith wrote: »

I know exactly what you mean. I think it's the difference between people who have a social group and people, like us, who don't really have one. People will call their friends to go out, but they'd rarely think to invite the person they've just met because they think 'Well, she was nice, but she wouldn't want to come out with us; she'll want to hang around with her own friends', without realising that a lot of people don't have that circle due to relocating or just plain falling out of touch with people.

Like one girl I know will invite me to parties at her house, but would never call when she's going out for drinks because she think's I'd be busy on a weekend night and, well, it's hard to tell someone 'No, you are my social life', and you don't want to put pressure on them either.

Yeah that's exactly how I feel when I meet new people, my social life begins and ends with them and I don't know how to get them to realise that without making them feel uncomfortable or coming across as weirdly clingy and it's impossible to just invite yourself to hang out with someone cos then they probably think you're rude but sometimes I just feel like doing it anyway.

Surely it shouldn't be this hard..?

All I want is someone I can talk to about things and for them to talk to me about things and share some common opinions, have a few glasses/bottles of wine together and watch a movie with and someone who will actually ask me to things and just ring randomly and ask me do I want to call over/go out. Is that really too much to ask for in this day and age?

RenatavonB

Lyra Fangs wrote: »

Based in Limerick but moving to Dublin in August would love to meet up since I'm moving to a new area and will have no one I know around me.

I'm not in Dublin but I would still be interested in getting to know you

Lyra Fangs

RenatavonB wrote: »

I'm not in Dublin but I would still be interested in getting to know you

That would be great I'm 21 and in a similar situation as yourself, I've fallen out of touch with most of my secondary school friends and now I'm finishing college and everyone will soon go their separate ways.

RenatavonB

Lyra Fangs wrote: »

That would be great I'm 21 and in a similar situation as yourself, I've fallen out of touch with most of my secondary school friends and now I'm finishing college and everyone will soon go their separate ways.

Yeah I've even found it hard to make good friends in college. Here add me on Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/RenatavonB

Dolbert

Have you guys joined the private forum yet? Lots of meetups in there! Just PM one of the mods for access

RenatavonB

Dolbert wrote: »

Have you guys joined the private forum yet? Lots of meetups in there!

Link?

kylith

RenatavonB wrote: »

Yeah that's exactly how I feel when I meet new people, my social life begins and ends with them and I don't know how to get them to realise that without making them feel uncomfortable or coming across as weirdly clingy and it's impossible to just invite yourself to hang out with someone cos then they probably think you're rude but sometimes I just feel like doing it anyway.

Surely it shouldn't be this hard..?

All I want is someone I can talk to about things and for them to talk to me about things and share some common opinions, have a few glasses/bottles of wine together and watch a movie with and someone who will actually ask me to things and just ring randomly and ask me do I want to call over/go out. Is that really too much to ask for in this day and age?

I think that what we need is playgrounds. Adult playgrounds that have adult sized swings and slides and maybe a sandpit. Then we could all run around like loons and take it back to the days of "Hi, my name is Kylith, what's yours? Would you like to build some sandcastles with me?" Make it so adult interaction isn't so fecking stuffy, half the time I don't even know if it's ok to ask someone their name.

RenatavonB

kylith wrote: »

I think that what we need is playgrounds. Adult playgrounds that have adult sized swings and slides and maybe a sandpit. Then we could all run around like loons and take it back to the days of "Hi, my name is Kylith, what's yours? Would you like to build some sandcastles with me?" Make it so adult interaction isn't so fecking stuffy, half the time I don't even know if it's ok to ask someone their name.

Yes! That's a brilliant idea, would be so much easier than awkwardly trying to start a conversation with someone in the queue of a shop or something. Kylith is a very interesting name, where is it from?

viota

yes i have the same problem.im 24 and i have no real freinds to hang out with here

Wibbs

No facebook page links please RenatovonB. As for the ladies lounge private forum, from the charter;

Private Meetup Forum

We have a Ladies Lounge private meetup forum - the thinking behind this is that details of where a group of women will be at a given time and place should not be public for all to see.

We will still continue to organize tLL beers in the main forum but as these are larger events the chances of something going wrong is significantly reduced.

Here are the rules to gain access:

1) If you are a lady with more than 100 posts, please PM one of the moderators of The Ladies Lounge: You will find their names at the bottom right of the forum page.

2) If you are a lady with less than 100 posts, please PM one of the moderators of the Ladies Lounge as above, but include a front facing photo of yourself holding a piece of paper that says "I am (username) and I request access to tLL private meetup forum" This is to ensure that we are only allowing women in. Photos will not be posted to the forum - it's not a popularity contest.

3) If you are a gentleman, I am afraid that we are not allowing you access at this time.

Hope this helps.

kylith

RenatavonB wrote: »

Yes! That's a brilliant idea, would be so much easier than awkwardly trying to start a conversation with someone in the queue of a shop or something. Kylith is a very interesting name, where is it from?

Wouldn't it be fantastic?! I went to a bouncy castle place for a niece's birthday a few months ago and they let all us grown ups play on them because it was quiet, so much fun, and sooooo much better than a gym. When I asked the owner he said that he'd definitely consider doing adult's birthday parties, but you'd have to keep the boozing till after the bouncing!

Kylith isn't my real name, it's a misspelling of the username I had on here before (which isnt' my real name either), then I forgot my password so I re-reged a few years later.

RenatavonB

Wibbs wrote: »

No facebook page links please RenatovonB. As for the ladies lounge private forum, from the charter;

Private Meetup Forum

We have a Ladies Lounge private meetup forum - the thinking behind this is that details of where a group of women will be at a given time and place should not be public for all to see.

We will still continue to organize tLL beers in the main forum but as these are larger events the chances of something going wrong is significantly reduced.

Here are the rules to gain access:

1) If you are a lady with more than 100 posts, please PM one of the moderators of The Ladies Lounge: You will find their names at the bottom right of the forum page.

2) If you are a lady with less than 100 posts, please PM one of the moderators of the Ladies Lounge as above, but include a front facing photo of yourself holding a piece of paper that says "I am (username) and I request access to tLL private meetup forum" This is to ensure that we are only allowing women in. Photos will not be posted to the forum - it's not a popularity contest.

3) If you are a gentleman, I am afraid that we are not allowing you access at this time.

Hope this helps.

It's Renata by the way.

OakeyDokey

Similar situation with myself. I find it so hard to plan something with friends. I have one friend who I make savage plans with but they always without fail will give me a text (never a call) with an excuse as to why they can't meet up.

Any site that I've joined to meet new people have ended up in sleazy guys looking for hookups. I want to meet and make friends!

Lyra Fangs

OakeyDokey wrote: »

Similar situation with myself. I find it so hard to plan something with friends. I have one friend who I make savage plans with but they always without fail will give me a text (never a call) with an excuse as to why they can't meet up.

Any site that I've joined to meet new people have ended up in sleazy guys looking for hookups. I want to meet and make friends!

Where are you based?

Naid23

OakeyDokey wrote: »

Similar situation with myself. I find it so hard to plan something with friends. I have one friend who I make savage plans with but they always without fail will give me a text (never a call) with an excuse as to why they can't meet up.

Any site that I've joined to meet new people have ended up in sleazy guys looking for hookups. I want to meet and make friends!

I know what you mean, some of those sites are not good.

Am similar situation myself, have 2 or 3 good friends but dont see them too muchso would love to meet some new people to hang out with, grab a coffee etc. Am in dublin so feel free to give me a shout.

galwayhooker

God, it's great to see this thread.I thought I was the only person who had same problem as ye guys! I am an outgoing person and love to keep fit and keep busy but I find as the years go on friends tend to drift away.Am from Galway but am based most of year in Kildare/Dublin area.I have mates who are single but as soon as guy wants to hook up for booty call its 'good luck" to me.Am 32 now and have learned no point in dating guys that only pick up phone when they want you for one night stands but girls I still don't realise that.I am def interested in meet up if some of ye guys up for one in Dublin from end of Aug on

Hi All

I'm in the same boat - would love to meet up with people if in and around Cork - Im in my 30's but always up for a laugh, a night out or just a coffee.

Feel free to get in touch

moonandstars

Anyone know of a thread for meeting people in Galway city or is this the only thread? Cant seem to find any.

Sauve

moonandstars wrote: »

Anyone know of a thread for meeting people in Galway city or is this the only thread? Cant seem to find any.

Mod

Hi moonandstars,
There is a specific Galway City forum, and although as far as I can see they don't have have a specific meetup thread, you may find details of clubs or events that you could go to.

Alternatively, there is a Private Ladies Lounge which is for meetups, but not necessarily in Galway. The charter of this forum gives details of how to access it.

Best of luck,
Sauve.

moonandstars

Yeah they don't seem to have any meetup threads but I will check the clubs threads, thanks for your help

edei

Hi everyone!

Im in the same situation. Late 20's, and finding hard to get to know people..! I'm based in Cork. anyone around here?

dubstarr

Im the same im 40 and its hard to make new friends.I have a few friends but needs to be bboked weeks in advance.Love somebody that i could ring on a saturday morning and go for coffee.Im in Dublin

Guys as per the two mod notes on thread, the Private forum is the place to organise meet ups. Drop me a PM for access, including a photo of yourself as explained in Wibbs' post above if you have less than 100 posts.

Thanks.