Would you rather be a Christian, a Muslim or a Jew?

kiffer

As always it comes down to food...
Bacon, porkchops, sausages, black pudding.
I mean what food do the others have that could possibly make up for losing pork.
OK so you're forced to be a proper Catholic so it's Fish on Friday and no booze during lent except on Paddy's Day...
That hardly compares to Ramadan...
This is a no brainer on the food front.
On the non food front I would go for Judaism over Muslim as it seems to have had most of the crazy knocked out of it over the years.

Are we talking no work on the Sabbath including using electricity Judaism?

legspin

Bacon...

Why does anything else need to be said?

Tomk1

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Assume you're forced to make a decision in life and you've only got one of the three Abrahamic monotheistic religions to choose from - which would you pick?

I know it's hypothetical and all that but I guess it'll show which religion is deemed the most acceptable (if that makes sense) and which particular faith would never be picked.

So, the choice is a Catholic, a Sunni Muslim, or an Orthodox Jew.

Personally, I'd be a Catholic because I think it's the most benign and harmless. Both the Jews and Muslims are prolific circumcising religions and that alone would deter me from entering the faith.

So which would you pick and why?

I don't think this is a level playing field. lets say weighed poll.

What's Sunni-Muslim are they more liberal.
Whats the difference between Orthodox Jew and Jewish, then there's the hollywood/TV type Jewish which seems similar level to Irish-Catholic like you go along with it but don't take too serious.

Is the Catholic the Irish-adhoc anything goes type Catholic or lets say more Orthodox Catholic or whatever with whipping your back daily with thorns, stopping whatever your doing to pray the angelus a few times daily.

If it's the Irish-Catholic then it wouldn't have much of an impact on my life at all, nothing would change, apart from saying non-blasphemous prayers. The Hollywood-portrayed type jewish also seems ok.

PopePalpatine

Nimrod 7 wrote: »

It didn't say anything about the virgins' gender

Or species, MWAHAHAHAHA!



This isn't much of a choice, I would've probably said "Anglican", but half of the country is Anglican in all but name!

endacl

Sunni Muslim

PopePalpatine wrote: »

Or species, MWAHAHAHAHA!

'Welcome to heaven. Here's your twenty one virgins. Unfortunately, we're running short on hamsters, so we've had to substitute a couple of unsullied goldfish. What? You didn't read the small print?!?'

Doctor Strange

Nimrod 7 wrote: »

It didn't say anything about the virgins' gender

Works for me

biko

Sunni Muslim

Catholicism because it's what I know, Orthodox Jews and Muslims are seriously hardcore so not any of those.

wretcheddomain

Sunni Muslim

Nobody wants to be a Sunni Muslim.

Maybe if I changed it to Rainy Muslim?

endacl

Sunni Muslim

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Nobody wants to be a Sunni Muslim.

Maybe if I changed it to Rainy Muslim?

Nobody wants to be any of the three options....

Sarky

Sunni Muslim

<Snip>

endacl

Sunni Muslim

Sarky wrote: »

<snip>

<snip>I can tolerate impressive bullsh1t levels in the interest of banter, but that took the biscuit.

Damn. Now this one is about biscuits too...

chughes

To me, circumcision is a major drawback so it would have to be Catholic.

(yes, that pun was intended)

IT-Guy

Sunni Muslim

endacl wrote: »

Haven't seen a BB post in ages. He's the sole occupant of my ignore list since RTDH departed these boards. I can tolerate impressive bullsh1t levels in the interest of banter, but that pair took the biscuit.

Damn. Now this one is about biscuits too...

To answer the poll, defo catlick as I don't fancy having bits of my family jewels lopped off, I couldn't handle praying 6 times a day (as well as the rest of the ceremonial bs) and would go nuts at not being able to eat bacon! It improves the flavour of any food it touches...drool :pac:

I remember reading through the entirety of the 9/11 thread on the CT forum and came away from it amazed at the ability of people to twist facts and public knowledge into evidence of a conspiracy. <snip>

Obliq

I'm wondering why it's not Catholic fundamentalist, similar to Orthodox Jew and Sunni Muslim? I'll of course go for Catholic, as in this poll it doesn't indicate that we'd be following any more rules than your typical a la carte catholic does here....

Judaism, on the other hand, allows for the moral choice of abortion in certain circumstances. Bacon not an issue, although I'd cry for smoked bacon with mustard....Mmmm :P

ThreeBlindMice

Christian but not "Roman Catholic" they are two separate identities. :P

This is why I didn't tick any of the boxes in the poll.

Brian Shanahan

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Assume you're forced to make a decision in life and you've only got one of the three Abrahamic monotheistic religions to choose from - which would you pick?

Suicide, while taking as many of them with me as I go.

Stark

Sunni Muslim

Probably Christian because I like my foreskin (so that rules Judaism out) and it's probably the lesser of evils when it comes to Islam.

sbsquarepants

Sunni Muslim

It would have to be catholic if only becuase of my fondness for the gargle and sausage sambos. Screw any religion that says no scoops and no sausages. Plus with the catholics you can pretty much do what you want once you say sorry afterwards, afaik it's the only religion which comes with a "get out of hell free" card. Thoughtfull feckers that they are:D

Bannasidhe

Just shoot me now.

Mr. CooL ICE

Bannasidhe wrote: »

Just shoot me now.

Muslim it is, then








sorry

wretcheddomain

Sunni Muslim

Bannasidhe wrote: »

Just shoot me now.

My personal sharpshooter is on his way. :P

Canis Lupus

Sunni Muslim

Irish catholic, it's basically the same as being an atheist.

Brian Shanahan

Bannasidhe wrote: »

Just shoot me now.

You can always join me in my suicide bomber pact.

Hotblack Desiato

sbsquarepants wrote: »

Screw any religion

fyp :pac:

Canis Lupus wrote: »

Irish catholic, it's basically the same as being an atheist.

If you add in a very large dollop of intellectual dishonesty and hypocrisy, yeah.

DazMarz

The whole no bacon/pork/ham/sausage/chorizo thing would get to me. As would no cheeseburgers, no milkshakes and so on (no mixing of milk and meat products in Kosher food).

The whole circumcising thing also makes me cross my legs at the thought of it. :eek:

Basically, I'm happy being a hell-bound atheist. But if I had to choose between the three, the Catholic thing is most benign. It's pretty a lá carte nowadays anyway, so pre-marital sex, contraception and meat on Fridays is cool. Not so much a la carte in the others. And the foreskin thing. Yeah...

Geomy

Id probably be Church of Ireland, less guilt and good craic...might get a job as a head gardener in some old country estate...

Id also have less religious paraphernalia to look at when in church and not get confused with all the saints etc. ...

PopePalpatine

I wonder what the results would be like if the "Catholic" option meant being a devout one rather than the average Irish one.

old_aussie

Sunni Muslim

Cause heaven ain't close in a place like this

wp_rathead

coolhull wrote: »

Aren't Muslim men guaranteed 21 virgins for their personal use when they get to heaven? That'll do me.

I dunno, ever been with a virgin? It's pretty meh..

:pac:

ShooterSF

Sunni Muslim

PopePalpatine wrote: »

I wonder what the results would be like if the "Catholic" option meant being a devout one rather than the average Irish one.

Similar I'd say. I definitely assumed the OP meant actually follow one of the 3. It's just the disadvantages like no sex outside of marriage and no contraception etc. is pushed by all 3 so it all comes down to bacon.