All the lonely people

af_thefragile

Where do they all come from?

Lately I've been noticing it to be a growing trend (especially on the internet) more and more people seem to be all alone. I remember when I was a kid (before I became a teenager) I had plenty of friends and there was no one my class who had no friends. Now it seems every other person is lonely. Is it because as people grow older they become more lonely? Or is because the economy is ****e? Or is it because of the internet that people don't feel the need to talk to people in the real world anymore?

Why have we all become so lonesome???

Maybe they always were and you're just hearing about it now

jaffacakesyum

Believe me there were lonely people "back in your day" too, it's not a new recent trend.

You can have all the friends in the world and still be lonely.

The Backwards Man

I'm a loner, but I'm not lonely.

af_thefragile

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

Believe me there were lonely people "back in your day" too, it's not a new recent trend.

You can have all the friends in the world and still be lonely.

What about people who have no friends?
Why do people become lonely?
Why won't anyone be their friend?
No one should be condemned to live a life of solitude like that...

The Backwards Man

af_thefragile wrote: »

What about people who have no friends?
Why do people become lonely?
Why won't anyone be their friend?
No one should be condemned to live a life of solitude like that...

Having friends is vastly overrated.

I remember when boards.ie was only guys, then a girl joined , trolls and mods followed :mad:

IM0

being alone =/= lonely, some people like to be alone

Frank Black

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I'm a loner, but I'm not lonely.

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.

AngeGal

I would suggest that the development of technology is a serious contributor. I don't know if any studies have been done on this but there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that people, especially children/teenagers, are spending significantly more time indoors than twenty years ago. Facebook is great but a quick chat on there isn't the same thing as spending an hour with a friend.

frank reynolds

im pretty sure that a lot of it is to do with the internet and (un)social media online. it absolutely without a doubt is addictive, meaning people are spending more and more time online and neglecting real life relationships until they dont exist anymore. In time, the person addicted to social media or being online is thinking "wow i have 1000 friends on facebook" without acknowledging the fact that they have lost all their real friends and now live online in a sad make-believe world full of nothing but avatars of other lonely people who this has also happened to.

crazygeryy

Frank Black wrote: »

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier.

IM0

crazygeryy wrote: »

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier.

killer thing to say

who_me

Working longer hours - less time to socialise.
TV/web/social media - lots of alternatives to going out.
Busier, more stressful work/life - lots of people want to just close the door on the world when they get home, not have to worry about what anyone thinks of them.

I think we're definitely moving in the direction of being more alone, and I'm not sure it's a good thing. Maybe what we want and what we need are two different things. It's kind of funny that the poorer you are, the more likely you are to be in a house sharing with many people; but the richer you are the more likely you are to be in a bigger house alone, maybe with a big garden around it, maybe walled-in. So the richer you get the more you isolate yourself.

Freddy Smelly

crazygeryy wrote: »

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier.

thats just poor... 0/10

krudler

IM0 wrote: »

being alone =/= lonely, some people like to be alone

Big time, constantly being around other people annoys me I like my own company

biko

http://themetapicture.com/guide-to-understanding-the-introverted/

Upstream

Frank Black wrote: »

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.

I've got pants, but I'm not a panther

who_me

who_me wrote: »

Working longer hours - Busier, more stressful work/life

This is certainly a factor. Some people simply do not have the time or energy to put some effort in to do things - find things - or arrange things to help alleviate their lonliness.

Some years ago when I spent a lot more time going to live music I started posting on the message boards of bands or singers I liked and organising a central meet up point for fans to have "Pre gig Drinks".

Most of the people who came came alone. People who had no one else to go to the gig with. They would have stayed alone had someone - in this case me - not put in the effort to arrange / organise something.

Instead they ended up meeting people - some making new friends - and even some making new lovers (in fact this is how I met my partners at one of these nights).

Sometimes the effort is small - posting a time and a venue on a message board takes all of 10 seconds - but someone simply making that effort can have a massive effect.

So yes I would agree time - energy - and motivation is a big factor in this and despite feeling massively lonely even the smallest effort to alleviate that can seem like climbing a mountain.

Latchy

The title of your thread OP comes from a song written and released in 1965 so loneliness is nothing knew and while the idea of been alone for even a day with no friends or family around is terrifying for some , even the most self reliant person or loner will sometimes want company and it's normal natural and healthy to have people around ' some of the time ' .

who_me wrote: »

lots of people want to just close the door on the world when they get home, not have to worry about what anyone thinks of them.

True , home for most of us is the refuge from the big bad world where we can create our own ambience and mood .

Hownowcow

At one stage in my life I had a lot of what I considered friends. However I realised that they weren't really friends, they were acquaintances. I now have a small number of people in my life. They are my friends.

I live alone and enjoy my own company but having these people as friends is wonderful. Real friendship can never be overrated.

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Having friends is vastly overrated.

Apologies Mr. Backwards Man. I admire your posts but I have to disagree with you on this one.

IM0

Freddy Smelly wrote: »

thats just poor... 0/10

oi, leave gerry alone, shes a friend of mine

Mocha Joe

I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone.

BraziliaNZ

blah blah irish women fake tan blah blah misguided expectations blah blah sex and the city

nelly17

Mocha Joe wrote: »

I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone.

Seemed more profound coming from Robin WIlliams

Wattle

I like being alone. It's peaceful and anyway people are full of sh1t.

nelly17

I have gotten to a point where I really enjoy my moments of being alone, but thats because theres not much of them. I dont know if I could hack being alone for any sustained period of time.

I do feel sorry for people who feel alone no matter what.

Mr.Prodston

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I'm a loner, but I'm not lonely.

Frank Black wrote: »

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.

crazygeryy wrote: »

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier.

Upstream wrote: »

I've got pants, but I'm not a panther

I've got hips, but I'm not a hipster.

Isn't that Ironic? :pac:

Hoop66

crazygeryy wrote: »

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier.

Aaah...soul.

old hippy

Sometimes, in the heaving metropolis, I like to be alone. Other times, I wish I was back home but then, times have changed, people have their own lives and you can't go back and recreate the past.

Mocha Joe

nelly17 wrote: »

Seemed more profound coming from Robin WIlliams

Does anything seem more profound coming from Robin Williams? He was good in that though.

Hownowcow

Upstream wrote: »

I've got pants, but I'm not a panther

I've no pants. Will you be my friend?

--Kaiser--

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Having friends is vastly overrated.

It isn't really. You just need better friends

Agricola

Seems to be a natural progression the more fast paced, urbanised, and work centric a society becomes. Read somewhere lately about the difficulty a girl had finding a partner is London. If you're not into the pub/club scene and not inclined to go online for it, its difficult to just strike up conversations in everyday situations because most people would be uncomfortable if a stranger just started chatting to them. We're on the same road here now.

Also people are more possessive of their time, like to do their own thing when they get a chance, maybe arent as conducive to people landing on their doorsteps out of the blue as they once were. All leads to lonely people.

cantdecide

Facebook and other social media have a lot to answer for. When you're on the less outgoing end of the scale you are bombarded with so many peoples' seemingly perfect and full lives. Of course this is no reflection on reality. Most people have long periods of time thinking Morrissey should write a song about their life!

Even look at Boards. More boasting than you can shake a stick at and all in the name of staving off the boredom on the long winters nights!

hollster2

Frank Black wrote: »

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster.

"I ham real ham"

Carnegie

I used to think I wasn't enough for anybody. I thought if I said yes to things, and got involved with people, then sooner or later they'd find out I'm not enough. I didn't think I had anything to share. But now I know that what I have to share is pretty huge, and I want to share it with you.

beks101

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Having friends is vastly overrated.

I don't think I've ever disagreed with a statement so much in my life.
You must have had pretty sh1tty friendships to believe this.
I'd be fcuked without my friends.

rolliepoley

All the lonely people
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely people
Where do they all belong?

The Backwards Man

beks101 wrote: »

I don't think I've ever disagreed with a statement so much in my life.
You must have had pretty sh1tty friendships to believe this.
I'd be fcuked without my friends.

Na, never had them, don't need them, don't want them.:)
There's not one single thing a friend does that can just as easily (or even easier) be done by yourself, or a stranger.

--Kaiser--

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Na, never had them, don't need them, don't want them.:)
There's not one single thing a friend does that can just as easily (or even easier) be done by yourself, or a stranger.

Pffff, my friends don't anything for me, but who else is going to appreciate my towering intellect, razor wit often jaw-dropping bursts of erudition?

my my my

Je déteste les gens

The Backwards Man

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

Pffff, my friends don't anything for me, but who else is going to appreciate my towering intellect, razor wit often jaw-dropping bursts of erudition?

Let me know when you have one, I'll appreciate it.:p

--Kaiser--

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Let me know when you have one, I'll appreciate it.:p

I'm due one any day now

Pug160

Although there are people who like being alone quite a lot, it's quite rare to find someone who doesn't like some company from time to time. That's why even loners go mad when they're locked up 23 hours a day in prison.

Fizzlesque

I love this video of this song. Good to have an excuse to post it.

Fizman

Anyone else read the thread title only to find themselves humming it to the tune of 'All the single ladies'?

beks101

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Na, never had them, don't need them, don't want them.:)
There's not one single thing a friend does that can just as easily (or even easier) be done by yourself, or a stranger.

But you're missing the point entirely.

You don't befriend someone for the practicality of what they can do for you (well - those friends aren't worth having.)

You befriend someone because of shared interests, morals, senses of humour, lifestyle, outlooks on life, similar or opposite personalities etc etc that provides for a lot more craic, encouragement, emotional support and love than a single human being can afford him/herself.

I love my own company and revel in spending days on end in it if I so choose, but my happiness and quality of life would be substantially lower if I didn't have any friends to turn to or shoot the sh1t with.

Hownowcow

Fizman wrote: »

Anyone else read the thread title only to find themselves humming it to the tune of 'All the single ladies'?

No.

0ph0rce0

I'd never be in the house or alone when i was young, had a ton of friends.

Then came the stage where everyone got the wimmins and got married, no one seen no one.

For myself i met a girl and met all my mates through her because all my old mates had moved away or had no time for anyone.

Then we broke up, And of course because i met all them through her, I went from having a ton of friends to ZERO, Kills all your confidence and ****s with your head. Gets harder and harder to meet new people as you get older.

Now its just me and the sock.

Its shít being lonely

FanadMan

biko wrote: »

http://themetapicture.com/guide-to-understanding-the-introverted/

That is brilliant - should be posted in all schools