Would you make the list?

Green Mile

If you die and you suddenly find yourself walking towards Pete who has a list in his hand, do you think you'd make the list or would you just asking him straight out "where's the stairs down?"

This is not a religious thread, just want to know if you think you're genuinely a decent chap/bird?!

kfallon

If your name's not down, you're not coming in!

JuliusCaesar

Of course. Dead decent.

mikom

Green Mile wrote: »

If you die and you suddenly find yourself walking towards Pete who has a list in his hand,

Outlaw Pete?

Wacker The Attacker

My name is wack and I like to attack.

Now open up there like a good man

juan.kerr

I don't think I've done much that would send me 'downstairs'.

Might be marginal though, it really depends on the standard they are applying.

Is having impure thoughts about women bad?

Wacker The Attacker

kfallon wrote: »

If your name's not down, you're not coming in!

Sorry. We're full

Links234

Who's Pete?

Wacker The Attacker

juan.kerr wrote: »

I don't think I've done much that would send me 'downstairs'.

Might be marginal though, it really depends on the standard they are applying.

Is having impure thoughts about women bad?

When you say impure thoughts do you mean inserting additional vegetables\fruit\fists during intercourse?

PhlegmyMoses

Guaranteed.

juan.kerr

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

When you say impure thoughts do you mean inserting additional vegetables\fruit\fists during intercourse?

Not quite that impure.

Knasher

Depends, the bible says the admission critera is belief; so on those grounds I'd be straight down. But your question seems more about being a decent person, and I generally consider myself a reasonably decent person.

Max Power

I'm a stand up guy.

Eathrin

I think I'm a good enough guy.
However my lack of religion would probably be a problem.

Wacker The Attacker

juan.kerr wrote: »

Not quite that impure.

Damn. I'm going to hell. I thought that was quite tame.

flutterflye

Fairly sure my body will be giving nutrients to the earth and Elton John will be singing The Circle of Life, but doubt there'll be any meeting of ancient dead folk.

Am I decent? Who isn't? Even Hitler had his good points.

frozenfrozen

Sure he has to forgive me didn't jesus die for me sins

juan.kerr

flutterflye wrote: »

Fairly sure my body will be giving nutrients to the earth and Elton John will be singing The Circle of Life, but doubt there'll be any meeting of ancient dead folk.

Am I decent? Who isn't? Even Hitler had his good points.

But he only had one testicle. Plus he was allegedly into scat.

SafeSurfer

I would definitely start an argument with Pete and if he insisted I wasn't getting in I'd say "ah its probably sh1te anyway".

Latchy

flutterflye wrote: »

Am I decent? Who isn't? Even Hitler had his good points.

Yeah...he liked dogs .

I might go down for a stretch but I'll get back up with good behavior ...

flutterflye

juan.kerr wrote: »

But he only had one testicle. Plus he was allegedly into scat.

Oh god no not scat, anything but scat - quick someone put a gun to his head!

who the fug

Be fecking livid if I wasn't on the list , would be straight on the blower to CJ and get that Peter posted to purgatory

juan.kerr

flutterflye wrote: »

Oh god no not scat, anything but scat - quick someone put a gun to his head!

Not as bad as munting though. But there is no evidence that he didn't also partake in munting. Afterall, it did originate in Germany I understand.

upstairs for coffee

Probably be told that they don't let anyone in wearing white runners.

Wacker The Attacker

flutterflye wrote: »

Oh god no not scat, anything but scat - quick someone put a gun to his head!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cnQCk0u49w

Pottler

Soo, munting eh? Yeah. Not too sure what's what on that front, I googled it but all I get is the message "You durty fecker, wash your keyboard out" so I presume it's not too pure. Going to Heaven? Sure I've my time done in hell here, got the Visa and everything.

aidoh

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

When you say impure thoughts do you mean inserting additional vegetables\fruit\fists during intercourse?

Hahaha

Cungi

St Pete: You're not comin in

Asshole: Listen here, i train UFC

St Pete: F$&* Off!

Green Mile

Cungi wrote: »

St Pete: F$&* Off!

Ahh heeyyyerrrr

Fr_Dougal

Green Mile wrote: »

If you die and you suddenly find yourself walking towards Pete who has a list in his hand, do you think you'd make the list or would you just asking him straight out "where's the stairs down?"

This is not a religious thread, just want to know if you think you're genuinely a decent chap/bird?!

I have no idea what you're talking about.

kerry4sam

Links234 wrote: »

Who's Pete?

St. Peter at the Pearly Gates of Heaven

Son Of A Vidic

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

When you say impure thoughts do you mean inserting additional vegetables\fruit\fists during intercourse?

Sounds like you got a size problem, poor fecker, I'll keep you in my prayers.

flutterflye

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Well, you know the way God made us all, right? And he's looking down at us from heaven and everything?
And then his son came down and saved everyone and all that?
And when we die we're all going to go to heaven?
Well, that's the bit I have trouble with.

Naid23

Nah directions to the stairs(hopefully slide) straight down. I'm feckered anyway as I have no soul as the aul myth goes! Being red has its benefits - least it will be warm in hell!

desertcircus

If being a decent person is the criterion for getting in, I have a chance. If belief is involved at all, I'm boned - haven't believed in a god since I was twelve years old.

CruelCoin

I believe there is no such thing as heaven/purgatory/hell.

That said, if there is, I'm in the purgatory fast-lane.

Czarcasm

I'd prefer to go downstairs tbh, singing with the angels sounds boring, the muslims can keep the forty virgins, I'll go for the girls with loose morals any day, much more fun!

Shenshen

Depends in the criteria applied.
I lived my life mostly in tune with my moral and ethics.
But how would I know if that pleases any given deity? Chances are, they wanted me to be spiteful towards certain groups, and follow some random "command"... so, no, I guess I wouldn't be on the list.

CruelCoin

Czarcasm wrote: »

I'd prefer to go downstairs tbh, singing with the angels sounds boring, the muslims can keep the forty virgins, I'll go for the girls with loose morals any day, much more fun!

47 no less!

Czarcasm

CruelCoin wrote: »

47 no less!

Oh right, for no apparent reason I always thought it was forty, Ali Baba and the forty thieves, Noah and the ark story with the raining for forty days and forty nights...

*drifts off back into own world again*

CruelCoin

Czarcasm wrote: »

Oh right, for no apparent reason I always thought it was forty, Ali Baba and the forty thieves, Noah and the ark story with the raining for forty days and forty nights...

*drifts off back into own world again*

For shame.

How could you ever mistake 40 virgins for 47....

Mind you, kind of worrying that it doesn't state if they're beautiful or not, or are they the "virgins for a reason kind"? Thinkaboutit

JustAddWater

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYZGxO1w5i8

Czarcasm

CruelCoin wrote: »

For shame.

How could you ever mistake 40 virgins for 47....

Mind you, kind of worrying that it doesn't state if they're beautiful or not, or are they the "virgins for a reason kind"? Thinkaboutit

Forty seven forty year old virgins... *shudders*, Now I DEFINITELY don't want to go to heaven!

toexpress

You assume there is an upstairs and a downstairs as opposed to just nothing ...

castletownman

kfallon wrote: »

If your name's not down, you're not coming in!

Go get a burger lad, you're a bit full at the moment.

Czarcasm

toexpress wrote: »

You assume there is an upstairs and a downstairs as opposed to just nothing ...

I take it you've never met a roman catholic with a sense of humor then?

toexpress

Czarcasm wrote: »

I take it you've never met a roman catholic with a sense of humor then?

I refer you to my post in the gay marriage thread ... am setting up my own religion ... Gay Witches for Abortion

Czarcasm

toexpress wrote: »

I refer you to my post in the gay marriage thread ... am setting up my own religion ... Gay Witches for Abortion

Ah jesus toe I'm not reading through that train wreck of a thread, but what are the chances really that a coven of lesbian witches would even be getting pregnant in the first place? I dunno, I'd have to think long and hard about converting... that sounds almost as bad as the forty virgins- a whole congregation of women you haven't a hope with!

Said with tongue firmly in cheek!

toexpress

Czarcasm wrote: »

Ah jesus toe I'm not reading through that train wreck of a thread, but what are the chances really that a coven of lesbian witches would even be getting pregnant in the first place? I dunno, I'd have to think long and hard about converting... that sounds almost as bad as the forty virgins- a whole congregation of women you haven't a hope with!

Said with tongue firmly in cheek!

Men can be witches too. Keeping in mind that I'm queer dear we generally make great bitches ... witches I mean witches. Also gay men are pretty easy so you will be assured of getting oral frequently!

hatrickpatrick

Truth be told I'm a bit of a gobsh!te. I'm good with words though (the kind of eejit who tends to win arguments even when he's totally wrong) so I'd just keep heckling him until he said "ah feck it, can't be arsed with this just go inside and leave me alone"

Czarcasm

toexpress wrote: »

Men can be witches too. Keeping in mind that I'm queer dear we generally make great bitches ... witches I mean witches. Also gay men are pretty easy so you will be assured of getting oral frequently!

I'm learning new things in this thread every minute, lol, I googled "male witches", they're called warlocks, I never knew, so I'm guessing a gay warlock would be called a "warcock"?

At least I could be assured you wouldn't have a wizard's sleeve!