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Undertakers, (I want to be one!)

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  • 17-11-2012 9:27pm
    #1
    Ghandee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭


    I've been thinking of this for a long time now,


    Undertakers must have poetry good jobs?

    Right, apart from dealing with death all the time, and possibly some tragic funerals (kids for example) they must have made one of the best career choices ever.

    Think about it.


    The pays good (ever seen an undertakers bill?)
    Cool uniform.
    Get to drive/be chauffeured in nice cars.
    Job variation. (pretty sure they'll only bury the one guy, one time)
    Job security. (constant stream of clients)

    Struggling to find anything bad about an undertaker job tbh, except maybe lifting the coffins, that'd be about the only real manual labour involved in the job.



    Anyone here ever worked as, or is an undertaker?

    Could you do the job?

    Interested to hear AH opinions on this.


«13

Comments

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    #2
    hedzball
    Registered Users Posts: 764 ✭✭✭hedzball


    Ya cause taking people from suicide scenes to the coroner is a good job.. I'd be well up for cutting the rope of a 15year old kid and putting him in a bag..

    Its not a good job by any means..

    The head you need and the psychological **** you would get out of it..

    Cool uniform?.. lol








    'hdz


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    #3
    mikemac1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,395 ✭✭✭✭mikemac1


    Closed shop

    The Masseys in Dublin compete with each other the same with the Mafia compete with each other :rolleyes:
    All sewn up


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    #4
    Ghandee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭Ghandee


    mikemac1 wrote: »
    Closed shop

    The Masseys in Dublin compete with each other the same with the Mafia compete with each other :rolleyes:
    All sewn up

    The masseys compete with the John Deeres round these parts sir.;)


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    #5
    mikemac1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,395 ✭✭✭✭mikemac1


    A Zetor is better!! :cool:


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    #6
    Run_to_da_hills
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,009 ✭✭✭✭Run_to_da_hills


    At €250 to remove a couple of fake coffin handles with a cordless screwdriver it must be lucrative.

    http://www.herald.ie/news/exposed-cemeterys-sham-250-fee-to-dispose-of-coffin-handles-1765668.html


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    #7
    Max Power
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,072 ✭✭✭Max Power


    Undertaking is illegal and dangerous. Shame on you OP.


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    #8
    monkeysnapper
    Registered Users Posts: 2,575 ✭✭✭monkeysnapper


    mikemac1 wrote: »
    Closed shop

    The Masseys in Dublin compete with each other the same with the Mafia compete with each other :rolleyes:
    All sewn up

    Why do you assume op is from Dublin .... Sh1t I'm from Kerry, should I close my account now :D


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    #9
    Mocha Joe
    Registered Users Posts: 895 ✭✭✭Mocha Joe


    Ghandee wrote: »

    The pays good (ever seen an undertakers bill?)
    Cool uniform.
    Get to drive/be chauffeured in nice cars.
    Job variation. (pretty sure they'll only bury the one guy, one time)
    Job security. (constant stream of clients)

    He's a WWE wrestler of course the pays good.
    He does have a pretty cool uniform.
    Of course he does. He's loaded.
    Yeah different wrestling matches and cool storylines. Pretty cool.
    He's The Undertaker. He can't be sacked.

    Not sure you can just decide to be him though....:confused:


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    #10
    spurious
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 27,147 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    Split shifts - mornings for funerals, evenings for removals.


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    #11
    mikemac1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,395 ✭✭✭✭mikemac1


    monkeysnapper wrote: »
    Why do you assume op is from Dublin ....

    This is the town forum ;)

    monkeysnapper wrote: »
    Sh1t I'm from Kerry, should I close my account now :D

    Don't you lot worship goats down there? Making them king at the Puc Fair?

    Yeah, I think you should close your account you filthy heathen :P


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    #12
    My name is URL
    Registered Users Posts: 25,068 ✭✭✭✭My name is URL


    You'd never be short of tae and a few sandwiches either


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    #13
    Ghandee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭Ghandee


    My name is URL wrote: »
    You'd never be short of tae and a few sandwiches either

    And pipe tobacco and brandy punch.


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    #14
    mattjack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    One of my Uncles worked as a part time undertaker, his other job was a mechanic. The day before he died, he had serviced the hearse that collected his remains from his house.On the way to the funeral home the hearse broke down.

    The driver rang his boss , who then rang the garage to complain about the service done on the hearse.

    The funeral home didn,t want to pay for the service, the garage didn,t want to pay my Uncle for his shoddy work.


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    #15
    monkeysnapper
    Registered Users Posts: 2,575 ✭✭✭monkeysnapper


    mattjack wrote: »
    One of my Uncles worked as a part time undertaker, his other job was a mechanic. The day before he died, he had serviced the hearse that collected his remains from his house.On the way to the funeral home the hearse broke down.

    The driver rang his boss , who then rang the garage to complain about the service done on the hearse.

    The funeral home didn,t want to pay for the service, the garage didn,t want to pay my Uncle for his shoddy work.

    That can't be true .... Please tell me this is a joke


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    #16
    Ghandee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭Ghandee


    mattjack wrote: »
    One of my Uncles worked as a part time undertaker, his other job was a mechanic. The day before he died, he had serviced the hearse that collected his remains from his house.On the way to the funeral home the hearse broke down.

    The driver rang his boss , who then rang the garage to complain about the service done on the hearse.

    The funeral home didn,t want to pay for the service, the garage didn,t want to pay my Uncle for his shoddy work.

    Lol, I bet he's not working for that garage anymore!


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    #17
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    Your going down Ghandee going down :-)


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    #18
    Max Power
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,072 ✭✭✭Max Power


    Don't they have to wash and clothe the bodies too?


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    #19
    seven_eleven
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,558 ✭✭✭seven_eleven


    I have a strange fascination with death. although Ive never actually handled a dead body, I would love to see the embalming process or even a autopsy. The human body is amazing. The things they do during autopsies is crazy.


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    #20
    Red Hand
    Registered Users Posts: 4,986 ✭✭✭Red Hand


    mattjack wrote: »
    One of my Uncles worked as a part time undertaker, his other job was a mechanic. The day before he died, he had serviced the hearse that collected his remains from his house.On the way to the funeral home the hearse broke down.

    The driver rang his boss , who then rang the garage to complain about the service done on the hearse.

    The funeral home didn,t want to pay for the service, the garage didn,t want to pay my Uncle for his shoddy work.

    That's gas. :) I suppose he regularly worked on clapped out old bangers whichever thing he was doing?

    The human body bit would bother me all right. Having to cut them open and wash them and pump them full of chemicals. However, I would like the top-hat/overcoat/gloves side of things.


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    #21
    Ghandee
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 ✭✭✭Ghandee


    FionnMcCool87 wrote: »
    Don't they have to wash and clothe the bodies too?

    Wouldn't bother me tbh. We're all human.


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    #22
    mattjack
    Registered Users Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    monkeysnapper wrote: »
    That can't be true .... Please tell me this is a joke

    No joke, its true.


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    #23
    Stained Class
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,808 ✭✭✭Stained Class


    OP. Don't bother.

    It's a dying trade.


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    #24
    maglite
    Registered Users Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭maglite


    Stained Class wrote: »
    OP. Don't bother.

    It's a dying trade.

    Dunno heard people are dying to use the service....:rolleyes:


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    #25
    Giselle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,540 ✭✭✭Giselle


    My name is URL wrote: »
    You'd never be short of tae and a few sandwiches either


    That should be tae and sangwiches!


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    #26
    Rasheed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,117 ✭✭✭Rasheed


    I'd say go for it OP. You'll never be out of a job, recession or no recession.

    Your head won't be wreaked listening to people you're working with.

    And you'll get job satisfaction from helping a family grieve by giving their relative a nice burial/creamation etc.


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    #27
    Pottler
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,073 ✭✭✭Pottler


    Don't tell anyone outside here this, but ye do know there's great money to be made digging graves despite the bad image? My mates a gravedigger, people tend to look down on him, especially as he gets a bit deeper. But he doesn't care, as he says himself, he gets his hole every day and just ignores the cheap digs.


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    #28
    Big Nasty
    Registered Users Posts: 22,080 ✭✭✭✭Big Nasty


    hedzball wrote: »
    Ya cause taking people from suicide scenes to the coroner is a good job.. I'd be well up for cutting the rope of a 15year old kid and putting him in a bag..

    Its not a good job by any means..

    The head you need and the psychological **** you would get out of it..

    Cool uniform?.. lol








    'hdz

    The forensics do all that sh1t dude.

    The undertaker lads get to dress blacktie and chill all day. ;)


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    #29
    Ann22
    Registered Users Posts: 8,004 ✭✭✭Ann22


    My hubbie remarked on this just there during the week, wondering if it was worth handing in cvs to the local undertakers. They all seem to be family run businesses. I think it'd be hard to look at so much heartbreak day in, day out.

    Imagine dealing with a child's little body, horrific:(. You'd want to be hard as nails to switch off afterwards.


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    #30
    mikemac1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,395 ✭✭✭✭mikemac1


    Ann22 wrote: »
    You'd want to be hard as nails to switch off afterwards.

    Just like doctors I'm sure a fair few turn into raging alcoholics

    Able to do the job but a naggin in the jacket pocket and in the car always


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    #31
    Jake Rugby Walrus666
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 528 ✭✭✭Jake Rugby Walrus666


    FionnMcCool87 wrote: »
    Don't they have to wash and clothe the bodies too?


    I want you to use all your powers, and all your skills. I don't want his mother to see him this way. Look how they massacred my boy


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