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Lying about age

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    #32
    nucker
    Registered Users Posts: 790 ✭✭✭nucker


    Piliger wrote: »
    I made no such insinuation.

    OK, fair enough


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    #33
    Schism
    Registered Users Posts: 2,919 ✭✭✭Schism


    Piliger wrote: »
    Are you seriously saying that if you found your GF/BF was 2 years older or younger than they had said on day one .... that you would be upset ? Are you serious ??

    I doubt it's the fact that their age is different, I'd imagine it's more the fact they lied about it in the first place.

    As LyndaMcL said, it could be passed off at the start due to insecurities but after a while if it doesn't come out you'd have to wonder what else they're hiding if they're still lying about something as simple as their age.


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    #34
    al28283
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,062 ✭✭✭al28283


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Personally I wouldn't feel comfortable starting a relationship based on lies.

    That implies the relationship is based on age. :confused:


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    #35
    nucker
    Registered Users Posts: 790 ✭✭✭nucker


    It maybe "insecurities" but if someone really wanted to date someone, and the other person was fussy about the age thing, fair enough the person wanting a date shouldn't really bother about the person who is fussy about age, but we can't tell either what to do


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    #36
    Piliger
    Registered Users Posts: 6,741 ✭✭✭Piliger


    Schism wrote: »
    I doubt it's the fact that their age is different, I'd imagine it's more the fact they lied about it in the first place.

    As LyndaMcL said, it could be passed off at the start due to insecurities but after a while if it doesn't come out you'd have to wonder what else they're hiding if they're still lying about something as simple as their age.

    Astonishing :confused:


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    #37
    jaffacakesyum
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    Piliger wrote: »
    Astonishing :confused:

    What is astonishing about wanting to be with someone who doesn't lie? :confused:

    Also, why the hell would you bother lying about your age? Seems pretty immature to me


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    #38
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Piliger wrote: »
    Are you seriously saying that if you found your GF/BF was 2 years older or younger than they had said on day one .... that you would be upset ? Are you serious ??


    Yes, because I don't like people lying to me.

    If they can get away with one lie, what else could they be lying about? I believe in being honest and expect the same in return.


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    #39
    Schism
    Registered Users Posts: 2,919 ✭✭✭Schism


    Piliger wrote: »
    Astonishing :confused:

    I'm not saying it'd be a deal breaker but I personally wouldn't be completely normal about it either.

    If I was with a girl for 6 months and she decided to tell me that's she's 28 instead of 24, my first thought would be to ask why she bothered to lie about it in the first place.

    It just makes no sense to me why someone would do it. If I liked her I'd still like her at either age.


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    #40
    CastorTroy
    Registered Users Posts: 28,922 ✭✭✭✭CastorTroy


    I'm 31. Born in 1981. I don't lie because I've no reason to. And if I did lie that would mean having to carry on the lie and risk getting caught out before you want.

    Like imagine if I was 30 in a month's time and started seeing someone who I told I was 26. 30 being a milestone birthday will mean my parents would make a big deal of it at least which means getting a birthday card with 30 on it. This is another thing you would either have to hide or lie about. So really not worth it.

    I do know a couple girls who haven't revealed their age to anyone we both know. I guess that's easier than lying. :)


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    #41
    nucker
    Registered Users Posts: 790 ✭✭✭nucker


    To be honest it all depends on the person who is being lied too


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    #42
    Pembily
    Registered Users Posts: 14,404 ✭✭✭✭Pembily


    I would be p!ssed off if I found out they had lied to me. Yes age is but a number so why lie about it??


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    #43
    jackofalltrades
    Registered Users Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭jackofalltrades


    I wouldn't lie about my age to get a date or for any other reason. The only reason I would tolerate it is, if a lady lied about her age on a dating website then owned up to it on the first date.
    Piliger wrote: »
    So you would seriously be upset if you were 35 and dating a 32 year old lady who then tells you a few months later that she is actually 34 ?
    On a simplistic level I'd be worried that she feels she has to lie to hide her insecurities.

    On a more serious level if it was getting serious after a few months and living together/buying a place/kids was on the cards, I'd be fairly taken back if that eventual plan wait from soon to urgent due to the lady suddenly becoming 2 years older.


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    #44
    beks101
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,802 ✭✭✭beks101


    Piliger wrote: »
    So you would seriously be upset if you were 35 and dating a 32 year old lady who then tells you a few months later that she is actually 34 ?

    How shallow !

    I don't think there's anything shallow about wanting to start a relationship on an honest note and expecting your potential partner to not try and conceal an ordinary part of themselves that you have a right to know about.

    Personally it's not the actual age difference of a few years that would piss me off, but the fact that they were prepared to lie about something so trivial - what else will they lie about? It's that I wouldn't comtemplate misrepresenting myself to someone I was interested in, the thought just wouldn't enter my head, I'm not that kind of person - so I don't want to have a relationship with that kind of person.


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    #45
    iptba
    Registered Users Posts: 4,876 ✭✭✭iptba


    Lying to me generally seems like too much hard work; one could end up lying to cover up the initial lie or all sorts of people may catch on to your lie (i.e. you end up being a liar and/or looking like a liar to more than one person). (It's a common theme in sitcoms I notice, but I can see how it can happen in real life).

    I recall lying about one thing in my life*: that I had done a course in hypnosis (the books I had read said that the more proficient people think you are at it, the more likely it is to work); however, I was only in school at the time so it probably wasn't that believable. Hopefully most people forgot about it but I hate to lose people's trust in me. So my motto is to avoid lying.

    * I may have lied more than that, but nothing immediately comes to mind and I try to avoid it. Also, probably on some matters of taste, I might have gone along with something e.g. does this look nice or whatever, but still try to not specifically lie. Probably some lies, of a sort, for young kid relatives.


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