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Why do bottoms outnumber tops?

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  • 05-07-2012 4:30pm
    #1
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭


    I know in reality most guys are versatile but so so many guys I've been with are very masculine and muscular but are bottoms and if they are vers or tops they submit to me so I'm kind of starting to doubt the whole vers thing.

    I'm a top and really dislike the feeling of anything up there (I'm starting to think I have no prostrate!:p) but I don't understand what's the huge appeal in taking it?

    I'm genuinely interested because it does nothing for me (haven't been fcuked but been messed around with). Could someone explain why it gets so much hype? :D

    Btw just because I'm a top doesn't mean I'm above bottoming or look down on it in case that vibe came across. Without them I wouldn't be having sex so I respect them. :)

    What's your preference? 67 votes

    Top
    0% 0 votes
    Bottom
    52% 35 votes
    Versitile (to varying degrees)
    47% 32 votes


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    #2
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 40,815 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Do bottoms outnumber tops?

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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    #3
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    mango salsa wrote: »
    Do bottoms outnumber tops?

    From my experience it looks like it anyway. It'll be interesting to see how this poll turns out.

    Maybe bottoming just lives up to the hype and is as good as they say?


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    #4
    Goodshape
    Registered Users Posts: 8,488 ✭✭✭Goodshape


    It just... feels good :)

    I guess there is a bit of a sub / dom thing going on... there's more to "top" and "bottom" than the strictly physical act. It's a psychological thing. There may also be a bit of pain before the pleasure -- which I'm sure isn't for everyone. I've always been happier to take that (not too much, mind!) than dish it out. Going on top often makes me a bit nervous that my partner isn't really enjoying this, and I get off on knowing that they are. I like to please :P

    Although plenty of lube and a little bit of patience, most or all of the pain can be done away with anyway.

    It also just feels good.


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    #5
    brokenice
    Registered Users Posts: 161 ✭✭brokenice


    there are!!!!! SWEET!!!!!!


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    #6
    Pedant
    Closed Accounts Posts: 919 ✭✭✭Pedant


    Frottage is better as it's more intimate, it incurs mutual respect, it respects each man's masculinity and it erodes away the notion of a "dominant" and "submissive" partner which creates inequality and imbalance.

    LONG LIVE FROTTAGE!!
    Spread the word!

    /exits thread


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    #7
    Goodshape
    Registered Users Posts: 8,488 ✭✭✭Goodshape


    Pedant wrote: »
    LONG LIVE FROTTAGE!!
    Spread the word!

    Indeed.

    Nothing wrong with foreplay ;-)


    It's also possible to be a pretty dominant "bottom" or submissive "top", if we're strictly speaking of which bits go where. And I don't buy that it's anything to do with lack of respect either way. Whatever you're into!


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    #8
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    Pedant wrote: »
    Frottage is better as it's more intimate, it incurs mutual respect, it respects each man's masculinity and it erodes away the notion of a "dominant" and "submissive" partner which creates inequality and imbalance.

    LONG LIVE FROTTAGE!!
    Spread the word!

    /exits thread

    Actually versatility is unique to a gay relationship. Therefore if you both are versatile it's all about giving and taking which is completely mutual. And that's more that could be said about a straight realtionship.

    I top guys but I have a huge amount of respect for them. As I said, I need them in order to have sex and they can take it ffs! I'm the one that's not even able to so that deserves respect right there.

    And loads of guys get off on the whole sub/dom thing. Me included. I love being the young lad that takes control of the guy and it goes down well with the guys I've been with;)

    Anal sex between between two masculine men is amazing. You're both conditioned to think it's 'wrong' and you get him where he's completely vulnerable to you. There is NOTHING like it. So close and intimate.

    Yeah you can be respectful and 'make love' and that's all good but sometimes you just want a hot and sweaty fuck where you get to fulfill your desires!;)


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    #9
    wonderfulname
    Registered Users Posts: 3,943 ✭✭✭wonderfulname


    1ZRed wrote: »

    Actually versatility is unique to a gay relationship. Therefore if you both are versatile it's all about giving and taking which is completely mutual. And that's more that could be said about a straight realtionship. !

    News to me...


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    #10
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    wonderfulname wrote: »
    News to me...

    Well with two guys, you can give or receive. A man and a woman can't do that.


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    #11
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 40,815 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    1ZRed wrote: »
    Well with two guys, you can give or receive. A man and a woman can't do that.

    Yeah they can.

    It's called a strap on.

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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    #12
    Goodshape
    Registered Users Posts: 8,488 ✭✭✭Goodshape


    A woman can also be the dominate sex partner, toys or not.


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    #13
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    mango salsa wrote: »
    1ZRed wrote: »
    Well with two guys, you can give or receive. A man and a woman can't do that.

    Yeah they can.

    It's called a strap on.

    Hmmm caught me out there!:P But realistically.

    Anyway everyone says nothing beats the real thing!;)


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    #14
    floggg
    Registered Users Posts: 5,820 ✭✭✭floggg


    1ZRed wrote: »
    Hmmm caught me out there!:P But realistically.

    Anyway everyone says nothing beats the real thing!;)

    Except lesbians!


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    #15
    Captain Graphite
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭Captain Graphite


    Honestly I wouldn't go out with any guy who limited himself to just one role. Be versatile or gtfo. :p


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    #16
    Goodshape
    Registered Users Posts: 8,488 ✭✭✭Goodshape


    Captain Graphite wrote: »
    Honestly I wouldn't go out with any guy who limited himself to just one role. Be versatile or gtfo. :p

    I thought about voting versatile tbh, but nah -- I do have a preference at the end of the day. More than happy to be versatile, though.

    That said, I'd be happier putting up with (eh, no pun intended!) an exclusive-top than I would an exclusive-bottom.


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    #17
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    Captain Graphite wrote: »
    Honestly I wouldn't go out with any guy who limited himself to just one role. Be versatile or gtfo. :p

    I think I want to try it out but with tonnes of lube, I still hate it! I think I could take it just about but it's the thrusting that I find horrible. That and no pleasure from my prostate...

    But if I don't like it, tough shit!I'm going to stay a top!:p


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    #18
    Captain Graphite
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭Captain Graphite


    Goodshape wrote: »
    I thought about voting versatile tbh, but nah -- I do have a preference at the end of the day. More than happy to be versatile, though.

    That said, I'd be happier putting up with (eh, no pun intended!) an exclusive-top than I would an exclusive-bottom.

    Ah yeah, not saying having a preference is bad or anything! Sorry if it came across that way. :) I just think it's important to be willing to be versatile, even if you have a preference. Like I do prefer one over the other (will leave my preference shrouded in mystery ;) ) but still it's important for me to have the option to switch things around, if you get me?

    I understand guys having preferences but don't understand who limit themselves by exclusively sticking to that preference.


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    #19
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    Captain Graphite wrote: »
    Ah yeah, not saying having a preference is bad or anything! Sorry if it came across that way. :) I just think it's important to be willing to be versatile, even if you have a preference. Like I do prefer one over the other (will leave my preference shrouded in mystery ;) ) but still it's important for me to have the option to switch things around, if you get me?

    I understand guys having preferences but don't understand who limit themselves by exclusively sticking to that preference.

    secret power bottom, begrudgingly versatile! :P

    It's not that I'm limiting myself, it's just that I really find it uncomfortable and not pleasurable in anyway. Mentally, I just don't get off on the idea of me getting fucked. It's just not in my mindset to get aroused by that.

    If a guy really wanted to top me badly I'd let him. But because I wouldn't enjoy it, it would make for some crap sex. I have only been asked to bottom once or twice and I refused those times but yeah I'll give it a shot sometime.
    No promises though;)


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    #20
    Conor30
    Registered Users Posts: 522 ✭✭✭Conor30


    1ZRed wrote: »
    Actually versatility is unique to a gay relationship. Therefore if you both are versatile it's all about giving and taking which is completely mutual. And that's more that could be said about a straight realtionship.

    I top guys but I have a huge amount of respect for them. As I said, I need them in order to have sex and they can take it ffs! I'm the one that's not even able to so that deserves respect right there.

    And loads of guys get off on the whole sub/dom thing. Me included. I love being the young lad that takes control of the guy and it goes down well with the guys I've been with;)

    Anal sex between between two masculine men is amazing. You're both conditioned to think it's 'wrong' and you get him where he's completely vulnerable to you. There is NOTHING like it. So close and intimate.

    Yeah you can be respectful and 'make love' and that's all good but sometimes you just want a hot and sweaty fuck where you get to fulfill your desires!;)

    You have good insight for such a young guy. This is an interesting thread. Thanks for posting.


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    #21
    ninty9er
    Registered Users Posts: 9,366 ✭✭✭ninty9er


    I'm not the most experienced example, but having topped and bottomed, I prefer to bottom.

    There's so much pressure to perform as a top that it just takes the fun out of it.

    I can be vers, but I voted bottom, simply because I'm an uncomfortable top (in 90% of cases)


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    #22
    azezil
    Registered Users Posts: 11,397 ✭✭✭✭azezil


    Always willing to be vers but prefer to be top.


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    #23
    L1011
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Motoring & Transport Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 67,745 Mod ✭✭✭✭L1011


    It seems to be an Irish thing, so I'll just use the quote from Another Gay Movie:

    "All Catholics are bottoms, my friend"


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    #24
    coolperson05
    Registered Users Posts: 280 ✭✭coolperson05


    In my experience (which isn't that much!), every guy I ever talked about this with or had 'dealings' with had a preference....there were more tops I think but very few said they enjoyed both equally. they all had a secret favourite!


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    #25
    oisindoyle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 899 ✭✭✭oisindoyle


    To all those who "prefer to be bottom " if I can be of any help .
    Please dont hesitate to send your phone number to me and I'll be so happy to "top" you anytime


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    #26
    coolperson05
    Registered Users Posts: 280 ✭✭coolperson05


    oisindoyle wrote: »
    To all those who "prefer to be bottom " if I can be of any help .
    Please dont hesitate to send your phone number to me and I'll be so happy to "top" you anytime

    Yay the gays are showing their true colours! lol :p


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    #27
    brokenice
    Registered Users Posts: 161 ✭✭brokenice


    oisindoyle wrote: »
    To all those who "prefer to be bottom " if I can be of any help .
    Please dont hesitate to send your phone number to me and I'll be so happy to "top" you anytime

    brilliant!


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    #28
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    The poor old tops aren't fairing all too well! Good to know there's less competition on the market at least:D

    Got talking to a guy today who is a self confessed top. After we hit it off he's keen to bottom for me. I think my observation is wrong or just applies to me for some reason. I asked a guy once why he was so quick to change his mind but I won't say for fear of sounding like more of an ass!:p

    * It had nothing to do with what's below the belt btw!


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    #29
    toexpress
    Closed Accounts Posts: 853 ✭✭✭toexpress


    mango salsa wrote: »
    Do bottoms outnumber tops?

    I would have to say I don't think so all offers I get these days are from tops I rarely get a turn anymore :-(


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    #30
    1ZRed
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    toexpress wrote: »
    I would have to say I don't think so all offers I get these days are from tops I rarely get a turn anymore :-(

    Well then make them turn for you! I've run into a lot of tops that were really set on topping me but I managed to change their minds. You don't know until you try I suppose :)


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    #31
    foggy_lad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,373 ✭✭✭✭foggy_lad


    Ah the age old art of turning! making someone believe you are a bottom until they have you banging away at them not knowing when or how the tables turned:D


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