Limerick

hatrickpatrick

There was a young waitress from Yale
On her breasts were the prices of ale.
And on her behind,
For the sake of the blind,
Was the same information in Braille.

ilovesleep

This is from politics.ie so not my own work but I love it:

There once was a man who devalued the punt
Who pulled many a dodgy stunt
He stuttered and stammered
And drank Bass til he was hammered
And now he's remembered as a good for nothing **nt

Ellis Dee

There once was a fellow from Kent
whose prick in the middle was bent.
To save all the trouble
he shoved it in double
and instead of coming, he went.:)

The_Thing

There was a young woman from Leeds,
Who swallowed a packet of seeds,
Out of her ass grew bunches of grass,
And out of her fanny grew weeds.

Batsy

There was a young man named Cameron,
Who told the EU to do one.
When he spotted that Merkel,
Had a face so purple,
He knew he had to do it more often.

W.Shakes-Beer

There once was a man who obliged,
... ??

Fúck

charlemont

There once was a thug called Wayne
He enjoyed inflicting pain
John Dessie and Ger were also insane
Wayne is no longer in control
on protection and doing his whack in the hole

Batsy

Limerick, Limerick, Limerick,
Such a crappy town it is.
I went there last year,
And was struck down with fear,
And couldn't help being sick.

Bumblegoose

There once was a man on Boards
His granny had just been to Lourdes
She fell over a van
Turned into a man
Now in her underwear theres a sword..

Sword as in penis. In case it made no sense..

ilovesleep

There was one a fat boll0cks in town,
It was ex-taoiseach Brian Cowen,
He got drunk on sherry,
sold us into debt slavery,
And now we may need to bring back the pound.

ilovesleep

There was once a lovely gent named Biggins,
He hated Fianna Fail with a passion,
He educated us all,
About the shenanigans in the dail,
Delighted he was with Fianna Fails trashing.

Liam Byrne

Funkfield wrote: »

I honestly thought this was going to be about stabbings.

Why so ? Have you ever been to Limerick, or do you take tabloid ****e as truth ?

There once was a thread here on boards
That was browsed and read by all the hordes
Of tabloid-rag readers
Those poor bottom-feeders
Who believe all the media whores

Liam Byrne

Batsy wrote: »

Limerick, Limerick, Limerick,
Such a crappy town it is.
I went there last year,
And was struck down with fear,
And couldn't help being sick.

A sad little poster called batsy
Once posted something false and nasty
When they tried to put down
My city as a "town"
I had to correct the poor patsy

Funkfield

Liam Byrne wrote: »

Why so ? Have you ever been to Limerick, or do you take tabloid ****e as truth ?

There once was a thread here on boards
That was browsed and read by all the hordes
Of tabloid-rag readers
Those poor bottom-feeders
Who believe all the media whores

I saw the title on my way to bed,
Then made a quip off the top of my head.
But some of the folk,
Did not get the joke.
It's After Hours, not a regional thread.

johndaman66

There was a young man named Denzil,
whose dick was as sharp as a pencil,
It went through an actress,
two sheets and a matress,
And shattered a china utensil.

Liam Byrne

Funkfield wrote: »

Liam Byrne wrote: »

Why so ? Have you ever been to Limerick, or do you take tabloid ****e as truth ?

There once was a thread here on boards
That was browsed and read by all the hordes
Of tabloid-rag readers
Those poor bottom-feeders
Who believe all the media whores

I saw the title on my way to bed,
Then made a quip off the top of my head.
But some of the folk,
Did not get the joke.
It's After Hours, not a regional thread.

I read this and I nearly choked
For the true definition of joke
Is a story that's funny
You know - on the money ?
And not some cliched ****e of a yoke

Liam Byrne

Just a quick one re Limericks, btw......there's meant to be a rhythm to the lines - not just having them rhyme.

http://www.poetryteachers.com/poetclass/lessons/limerick.html

44leto

How about some haiku poetry about Limerick

Limerick drugs crime
People live there as dawn breaks
Home of the garryowen


Err OK Haiku is notoriously difficult to write.
OK stick to Limericks

Karmafaerie

sigh:rolleyes:

im invisible

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