Dwarf for Stag

thehandyman

Hello,

Can anyone tell me if they know can you hire a dwarf for a stag night in Ireland. I have got a price from UK, £500 for the night, not including flights and accommodation.

The stag is on in Galway.

Thanks

JustAddWater

Sorry, I can't do it on short notice

stovelid

phasers

...Why?

Jen Pigs Fly

You'll have a hard time trying to find one ...

I hear they're in short supply at the moment

:pac:

mikom

thehandyman wrote: »

Hello,

I have got a price from UK, £500 for the night, not including flights and accommodation.

Too high.

amacca

did you try the Argos Catalogue? .......they've got everything I'm told.

So whatya gonna do...bit of auld dwarf throwing...some dwarf wrestling....bit of dwarf theatre?

Dotrel

Is Knacker Dwarf still in Galway? I bet you could get him for a ton.

minidazzler

I can kidnap a small fat child if you want, you can just pretend it's a dwarf if the groom has bad eyesight.

hondasam

Seamus the midget, he is from galway, Id say he would do anything for money.

Latchy

What ya gonna do with this Dwarf ...throw him around or something ?

krudler

The president doesnt do private bookings anymore, too busy.

thee glitz

Reminds me of
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=56002015&postcount=7

A "fellow down the pub" told me that he was at a stag party and in the middle of the first night a midget painted green came running out and handcuffed himself to the groom. The lads had hired some company who provided midgets for stag weekends. The groom was handcuffed to the midget for 3 days, slept, ate and went to the toilet together.

kincsem

http://martysmyth.net/nothing-too-mad/

Yakult

I'm not even gonna ask...

sunflower27

Why would anyone spend £500 on a dwarf. What is he/she expected to do for that? You all sit around and ridicule them? That's just weird.

AudreyHepburn

So you want to hire some poor unfortunate individual so that you can sit around, most likely getting hammered, and ridicule him/her based on his/her size?

You sound like an absolute charmer OP :rolleyes:

Wertz

ah for the good old days when some stripper turned up dressed as a ban garda...for a lot less than €500

Lumbo

Wertz wrote: »

ah for the good old days when some stripper turned up dressed as a ban garda...for a lot less than €500

The OT and pension is a lot better these days for your average Ban Garda.

Wertz

But not for your average stripper. Dwarves are eating into their market share.

DublinWriter

Dwarves are so Celtic Tiger.

earpiece

Call Joe Duffy.... I hear he has one in the studio full time.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9oiO6RVKrU

Latchy

DublinWriter wrote: »

Dwarves are so Celtic Tiger.

Yeah , every driveway had two or three .

Oh wait ...they are garden knomes

The Internet Explorer

I'm assuming your trying to find a dwarf to feed to your stag. I'm usually up for a having a good time and do enjoy the craic as much as the next, but this is just plain sick ! Did you ever think that you might just get caught ? You can't just go around feeding other human beings to animals you know ! And certainly not just because they happen to be dwarfs ! Not to mention the fact that the stag probably wouldn't even eat the dwarf ! If you go ahead with this sick plan, I hope you get caught ! Feeding dwarfs to stags ! No wonder the country is so f***ed up ! !

texidub

OP, you should think hard before doing this...

and that's the long and short of it!

Immaculate Pasta

I knew someone who hired a dwarf for a stag do in Edinburgh. The photos from the night out were some of the funniest I've seen. Basically picture a half naked bloke passed out in the middle of Princes Street handcuffed to a dwarf dressed as a smurf who was posing with a group of lads on the stag as well as some guy in a kilt, bagpipes the full works all posing round him

wonderfulname

There's a dwarf that dresses up as a leprechaun for the tourists on grafton street in dublin, maybe you could dwarfnap him?

AnamGlas

Looks like you've a small problem there

thehandyman

Thank you all for your short but helpful replies:D

Audrey ye need to chill out

mikom

AudreyHepburn wrote: »

So you want to hire some poor unfortunate individual so that you can sit around, most likely getting hammered,

The dwarf is fed with drink all night as well.
The last one that was at a stag I went to was a little prick (oh matron) and was still demanding booze when most of us were under the table.

AnonoBoy

mikom wrote: »

The dwarf is fed with drink all night as well.
The last one that was at a stag I went to was a little prick (oh matron) and was still demanding booze when most of us were under the table.

If I had to go to a stag of some dude I didn't know and be handcuffed to him for the night I'd be demanding constant booze too.