Letters from C&H to the world!

Jhcx

Dear Jhcx

Keep the head high.. Keep positive last night you realised and coped on. Today has been really positive no matter how sick you were feeling it's just emotions they wash away. Keep this up and the old you will be back. You've become something you were never ment to become you've let emotions get in the way. But let today be the first day to be the mature 21 year old everyone sees you as.

Jhcx

Dear life,

Why am I unable to stop analysing everything every small detail. why must I jump into the reality of unknown. who am I supposed to be? I'm a smart person but choose not to use any part of my brain and act stupid. What is my path or is there a path for me at all? let's sleep for one more day and see what tomorrow brings

Justherechillinx

iamanengine

Just here chillin x...well there is a long wondered question answered!

pajor

Dear girlfriend

Yesterday I returned home after spending 6 glorious weeks with you in your wonderful little house. While I am a little heartbroken that I won't get to wake up next to you every morning for a good while now; our long time together really did show to me how I just wouldn't be able to cope and go on with life without you in it.

To many more happy times together.

Lots of love

P

Dwy

Dear Conor,

Why did I waste 5 years chasing after you, infatuatingly in love with you when I should have been loving myself most importantly throughout all of those secondary school years. Why am I so inclined to believe there is hope at the end of every rainbow? I'm sorry for putting you on the pedestal and creating a distance between a true friendship we could have made. I barely came into school and ended up with around a 70% attendance over you; even leaving 5th year early. It took me too long to realise that if it were mean't to be, it wouldn't have seemed so hard when trying. However, thanks for opening my eyes to my true self-worth and how much over the horizon is meant waiting for me. I guess at the end of the day, if you can't love yourself; how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?

Dear Me,

Well here we are bitch, why are you such a bitch; well it ain't a bad thing eyy? LOL. You say you don't like labels, yet that's all you judge by... I'm sorry we lost track on what's really important. You really gotta stop bringing people into every 'problem', which by your definition isn't even a problem for you. I know you say you don't care enough to tell anyone you are gay, yet that's still an issue for you when push comes to shove. Although I guess when you consider it to be a weapon when another has knowledge of it, anybody would. This post is the most vulnerability you've ever shown in your life to others, but the fact it is; is just very sad. You hold a lot of grudges, but don't fool yourself into thinking everyone deserves a second chance... Your dad was a clear disappearance from most of your life and made hell for the person who means the world to you, your mum. The bruises and emotional scars he's left on her and everyone are something to never forget. I hope you make a circle of friends with your fighting game connections in Ireland and stop being so shy to even start up a conversation because you're afraid of saying something wrong to ruin the whole thing. Like sending that message to that one guy sparked the light bulb in your dim head that you were actually kind of infatuated with him the day you spoke to him, even though he's with someone and clearly not gay but like oh well. Remember that guy you met at that fighting game tournament? He stood out because of a physical difference (I thought he was major cute though!) between him and many other people and you were just in awe and respect for him because of how socially able he was with others, despite having something that must get asked a lot about by common other ignorant people he must meet on a daily basis. I wish you find a common ground with those Irish guys to become more liked and involved... You really need to try hard this time to not let go every single time you believe it's too difficult to make any friends and self-indulge yourself back into loneliness like you have been doing for the last 5 years. You've been thinking too much with your head, and forgot what really matters in life is to follow your heart (like Mulan).

Dear Dream,

You're the reason I wake up in the mornings, why I make a breath, take a step and hold a grip on reality so tightly. The perfect personal appearance, nice circle of friends who love you for you, living in a great area surrounded by cool people and the perfect kawaii Asian boyfriend (yeah I don't know why it's not like I don't like others but it's just a preference thing really when I think of love). I just hope you come sooner than I honestly feel it all will...

Always and Forever,

Dwy

- - -

I feel as though someone I know of will eventually read this, and in that moment you've finished reading I would greatly appreciate you ask me about anything I've written if you wish, so things aren't left out in the open. I could never expect to be friends with others and they don't even know who they're friends with, now's the end of that. I also didn't want to end this post on a bad note so I wanted to say thanks to the few who's chatted with me in the IFG scene, to help me feel included and welcomed; despite my clear lack of return... your efforts are not ignored! Also, special thanks to Skye for being the bestie hoe with me throughout it all (LOL!). As well to everyone who's taken care into reading! (:

Jhcx

Dear Words.

Write me a sentence that smiles. write me one that brings good news, one thats filled so that i dont think about the negative things my brain likes me to listen to. But words, please shut up, Dont speak anymore you are going to hurt someone scratch that you will hurt a lot of people. Damage has been done friends have been pushed away. Words if you seriously want to do something write me a cv, or make me become something better than this person i am.

Sincerely,
The personality in the Body.

Jhcx

Dear Thread

I forgotten you were here till now where you popped into my head to remind me i can write somewhere public that i do not wish to keep to myself. but Unfortunately the letter i have in my head i feel i should not lower myself to allow others to win. holding this letter will drain me but i guess for me to be stronger i have to hold my anger within me to prove to myself that i will not be beaten by words and anger.. I just hope that for those who wait good things will come. And those who hurt others deserve the misery they deserve so they too can feel the pain inflicted by them on others.

Yours,
The fingers that type the keys.