Friend of a friend stories

Tayla

We've all heard them, those stories that happened to a friend of a friend...............

Yesterday I was talking to my mother in law who told me a story about a friend of hers who had a baby, she was asleep in bed one night after breastfeeding her baby and (apparently) she woke up and there was a rat trying to suck on her boob :eek:

Anyone else ever hear any out-there stories that you don't know whether to believe or not...?

Cill Dara Abu

I have no friends

DEFTLEFTHAND

Its just a phrase invented to give you free reign to tell someone a Bullsh1t story.

cassid

Her breast might have stayed out of her top and her other half might might have tried it on, she might have called him many names, the mildest being rat. Either that the rat had been watching her and the baby latching on very closely ( would have to very close to observe the technique) and decided to help himself one night. Funny story but absolutely ridiculous, thank goodness never happended when I was breastfeeding my children

Eroticfishcake

My friends friend is a Nigerian prince. Its definitely true. Anyway all you have to do is forward on your bank account details and he will let you share in the wealth.

PM me for details

whatdoicare

My Aunt often tells me stories about her friend or friend of a friend.....then you see the exact story she told on coronation street later that week!:rolleyes:

mikemac

Met an itinerant girl out one night and went home with her

"None of your fancy stuff, horse it in boss"

Ditch

Vaginal Worms. Ever so much as mention 'Friend of a friend' stories to me and I remember the classic " Vaginal Worms " one.

mikemac

But Slimfast contains worms doesn't it.
You have the shake and then the worms eat you from inside but it's all safe

Friend of a friend make a shake once, forgot about it and came back a few hours later and saw worms in the glass

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

I actually use the old "friend of a friend" thing a lot of the time when I'm telling funny stories I read on boards, I just don't want to have to go:

"Well I was reading this thread on boards..."

"A what on where?"

Then you try to explain what boards/the internet is to whoever it is you're telling the story to and you're met with blank looks and by the time you've finished you're not in the mood to tell it anymore so they can feck off.

rebel10

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

Eroticfishcake

A friend of a friend was fapping in his bedroom to a bit of porn, had his headphones on and you will not believe this. When he finished there was a cup of tea that his mam had left on the bedside locker :rolleyes:

Micky Dolenz

Aka urban legends aka urban myths aka bullsh*t stories.

Did I ever tell you the time Bruce Springsteen took a photo of me and Bono?

mikemac

Friend of a friend on Bus Éireann leaving Limerick and they pass Bunratty Castle

The American tourist behind them was very impressed
"Oh so clever, they built the castle beside the freeway"

I've heard that story multiple times and also, impossible that anyone is that stupid

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Did I ever tell you the time Bruce Springsteen took a photo of me and Bono?

Were you in a restaurant and someone asked you to move and you were angry but eventually agreed.
And when you were leaving you discovered Bono paid your bill for the inconvenience?

Saila

usually a way of saying "I know the person the story is about but to save them and me Im going to remove him further by saying a friend of a friend so it harder for you to know who we are talking about"

MagicMarker

Cill Dara Abu wrote: »

I have no friends

Liar, my friend said you're a friend of a friend of his.

meditraitor

Eroticfishcake wrote: »

A friend of a friend was fapping in his bedroom to a bit of porn, had his headphones on and you will not believe this. When he finished there was a cup of tea that his mam had left on the bedside locker :rolleyes:

he's not from Balbriggan by any chance;)

DonalK1981

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

Aka urban legends aka urban myths aka bullsh*t stories.

Did I ever tell you the time Bruce Springsteen took a photo of me and Bono?

Pics or GTFO

Micky Dolenz

mikemac wrote: »

Were you in a restaurant and someone asked you to move and you were angry but eventually agreed.
And when you were leaving you discovered Bono paid your bill for the inconvenience?

Nah, they invited me to stay. We went for drinks, took loads of drugs and went to a Romanesque orgy. It was well class.

DonalK1981 wrote: »

Pics or GTFO

Home video do ya?

charlemont

All my friend of friend stories are true as I'v been friendly with some nutters over the years.

Ditch

rebel10 wrote: »

she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses.

That's the one! See my " Vaginal Worms " post, above!

Brilliant how these concepts morph, while remaining true to the underlying 'moral' of the " IF "

Ms. Chanandler Bong

mikemac wrote: »

Friend of a friend on Bus Éireann leaving Limerick and they pass Bunratty Castle

The American tourist behind them was very impressed
"Oh so clever, they built the castle beside the freeway"

I've heard that story multiple times and also, impossible that anyone is that stupid

Friend of a friend works as security in Shannon Airport. At the height of foot & mouth crisis, everyone coming through arrivals had to line up & walk through one of the foot baths. Friend of friend is directing the passengers in a thick Limerick accent. American tourist in queue to her friend: "That must be Gaelic he's speaking"!!! :cool:
Have another story from him where an American tourist asked him where they could see lep-ree-shans (leprechauns):rolleyes:

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

It seems to be remarkably common that people overhear Travellers saying 'Sure a course I love ya, doesn't I ride ya and buy ya chips!'

Welruc

rebel10 wrote: »

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

Oh my god i know that girl!!!!

Senna

I love hearing those "friend of friend" stories, especially when its something really stupid, but the person telling it believes it word for word.:D

Eroticfishcake

meditraitor wrote: »

he's not from Balbriggan by any chance;)

Of course he is...and from just about every other town in Ireland

amacachi

rebel10 wrote: »

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

I've heard the "lice or disease that starts on dead people one" with several endings, my favorite being that they traced it to a guy who worked in a mortuary. :pac:

mikemac

Friend of a friend was getting the Bus Éireann in Doughiska in Galway, home to many non-nationals in the city. Little Africa some say. Little Odessa is another name

A black lady left her buggy at the bus stop
The bus driver pointed this out but
"I don't care, sure the social welfare will buy me a new one"

Kidchameleon

Rat on the tit does happen I'm afraid.

Flincher

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift. Now she had a kid and a big buggy with her. The driver spent about 10 minutes trying to fold the buggy into the car, but she said "don't worry about it, leave it there, they'll give me another one".

Flincher

mikemac wrote: »

Friend of a friend was getting the Bus Éireann in Doughiska in Galway, home to many non-nationals in the city. Little Africa some say. Little Odessa is another name

A black lady left her buggy at the bus stop
The bus driver pointed this out but
"I don't care, sure the social welfare will buy me a new one"

SNAP!!!!!!! well......kinda

rebel10

Kidchameleon wrote: »

Rat on the tit does happen I'm afraid.

What????:eek:

Kidchameleon

rebel10 wrote: »

What????:eek:

Sure does. Also I know a guy who was eating biscuits in bed, woke up to a rat eating the crumbs off his chest.

rebel10

Kidchameleon wrote: »

Sure does. Also I know a guy who was eating biscuits in bed, woke up to a rat eating the crumbs off his chest.

Ya, the crumb eating rats aren't anywhere as scary as the nipple sucking ones! What the hell would you do! :eek:

Aoifey!

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

jdooley28

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

awh what a lovely story, thanks for sharing!

mikemac

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift.

Friend of a friend tells me the asylum seekers get hassle and abuse on the streets and public transport

So the social welfare gives them two thousand euro and they can use that to buy a cheap car.
This way they won't get hassle on buses.
As if most Irish people don't already get hassle from skangers......

Friend of a friend swears it's true, he works in a dealership and has seen the cheques
A taxi driver confirmed it too, taximen know everything

Aoifey!

jdooley28 wrote: »

awh what a lovely story, thanks for sharing!

Eh, you're welcome?

TheMilkyPirate

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

That is the most rotten thing i've read on here in ages, Fuck me.

jdooley28

Aoifey! wrote: »

Eh, you're welcome?

sorry wasn't trying to be smart i just got an image in my head when I read that and it wasn't it nice!

dave..

A friend of a friend was nearly killed by his housemate.....by tying to force his way into his room with the kitchen knife.........:D

barakus

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift. Now she had a kid and a big buggy with her. The driver spent about 10 minutes trying to fold the buggy into the car, but she said "don't worry about it, leave it there, they'll give me another one".

yeah Ive heard that one off of three different people. One of them actually tried to tell me that he saw it with his own eyes:rolleyes:

http://www.snopes.com/risque/juvenile/lobster.asp

i swear this happened to a friend of a friend!

danslevent

rebel10 wrote: »

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

I remember the first time I heard this story I was so shocked and disgusted! Though by the fourth retelling off different people with variations I finally came to terms with how gullible I can be at times

I think we have all heard that story of a friend of a friend who drank a liter of vodka raw, or pint glass whatever, and died. Which I'm sure has happened but you just hear it off so many people....

WallyGUFC

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

Ah fook sake, that was doing the rounds in Galway. Except it was Starburst

falan

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift. Now she had a kid and a big buggy with her. The driver spent about 10 minutes trying to fold the buggy into the car, but she said "don't worry about it, leave it there, they'll give me another one".

This happened at the bus station in Limerick...Fact, i heard it from the taxi drivers own mouth:rolleyes::D

Hrududu

Years ago a friend told me a great story about something that happened to a friend of hers. So for years I told it to others, telling them it happened to a friend of mine. I recently found out that its actually an anecdote taken from a pretty popular book.

When I think back on all the people I told, how many of them knew well and humoured me? Oh the shame.

mr.wiggle

Hrududu wrote: »

Years ago a friend told me a great story about something that happened to a friend of hers. So for years I told it to others, telling them it happened to a friend of mine. I recently found out that its actually an anecdote taken from a pretty popular book.

When I think back on all the people I told, how many of them knew well and humoured me? Oh the shame.

Jesus.. it bloody better be a good story now that you've built it up??
Come on , out with it....

buyer95

Eroticfishcake wrote: »

A friend of a friend was fapping in his bedroom to a bit of porn, had his headphones on and you will not believe this. When he finished there was a cup of tea that his mam had left on the bedside locker :rolleyes:

Lol, this was robbed from another thread!

Karona

A friend of my brothers girlfriend went off to volunteer in a poor country. When she got there she saw a little dog that was mad skinny and she felt sorry for the little thing. She grew to love the dog and when it came to coming back home she brought the dog home with her.

She decided to find out what breed the dog was so she brought it to the vets where the vet told her it wasn't in fact a dog but a very large rat.

True Story.

bowsie010

What about the old "friend of a friend" went to a new chinese in town and got a microchip from a dog lodged in his tooth.

True Story.