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Friend of a friend stories

Tayla

We've all heard them, those stories that happened to a friend of a friend...............

Yesterday I was talking to my mother in law who told me a story about a friend of hers who had a baby, she was asleep in bed one night after breastfeeding her baby and (apparently) she woke up and there was a rat trying to suck on her boob :eek:

Anyone else ever hear any out-there stories that you don't know whether to believe or not...?

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rebel10

Kidchameleon wrote: »

Rat on the tit does happen I'm afraid.

What????:eek:

Kidchameleon

rebel10 wrote: »

What????:eek:

Sure does. Also I know a guy who was eating biscuits in bed, woke up to a rat eating the crumbs off his chest.

rebel10

Kidchameleon wrote: »

Sure does. Also I know a guy who was eating biscuits in bed, woke up to a rat eating the crumbs off his chest.

Ya, the crumb eating rats aren't anywhere as scary as the nipple sucking ones! What the hell would you do! :eek:

Aoifey!

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

jdooley28

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

awh what a lovely story, thanks for sharing!

mikemac

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift.

Friend of a friend tells me the asylum seekers get hassle and abuse on the streets and public transport

So the social welfare gives them two thousand euro and they can use that to buy a cheap car.
This way they won't get hassle on buses.
As if most Irish people don't already get hassle from skangers......

Friend of a friend swears it's true, he works in a dealership and has seen the cheques
A taxi driver confirmed it too, taximen know everything

Aoifey!

jdooley28 wrote: »

awh what a lovely story, thanks for sharing!

Eh, you're welcome?

TheMilkyPirate

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

That is the most rotten thing i've read on here in ages, Fuck me.

jdooley28

Aoifey! wrote: »

Eh, you're welcome?

sorry wasn't trying to be smart i just got an image in my head when I read that and it wasn't it nice!

dave..

A friend of a friend was nearly killed by his housemate.....by tying to force his way into his room with the kitchen knife.........:D

barakus

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift. Now she had a kid and a big buggy with her. The driver spent about 10 minutes trying to fold the buggy into the car, but she said "don't worry about it, leave it there, they'll give me another one".

yeah Ive heard that one off of three different people. One of them actually tried to tell me that he saw it with his own eyes:rolleyes:

[Deleted User]

http://www.snopes.com/risque/juvenile/lobster.asp

i swear this happened to a friend of a friend!

danslevent

rebel10 wrote: »

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

I remember the first time I heard this story I was so shocked and disgusted! Though by the fourth retelling off different people with variations I finally came to terms with how gullible I can be at times

I think we have all heard that story of a friend of a friend who drank a liter of vodka raw, or pint glass whatever, and died. Which I'm sure has happened but you just hear it off so many people....

WallyGUFC

Aoifey! wrote: »

Did ya hear the one about the couple and the skittles?

Friend of a friend wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, so he put 3 skittles up her. Tried to get em out with his tongue. He got out 4 and didn't think anything more of it. Next day he had a rash all over his face. Turns out the fourth was a nest of crabs.

Ah fook sake, that was doing the rounds in Galway. Except it was Starburst

falan

Flincher wrote: »

I think everyone knows somebody who met the taxi driver who was given an asylum seeker a lift. Now she had a kid and a big buggy with her. The driver spent about 10 minutes trying to fold the buggy into the car, but she said "don't worry about it, leave it there, they'll give me another one".

This happened at the bus station in Limerick...Fact, i heard it from the taxi drivers own mouth:rolleyes::D

Hrududu

Years ago a friend told me a great story about something that happened to a friend of hers. So for years I told it to others, telling them it happened to a friend of mine. I recently found out that its actually an anecdote taken from a pretty popular book.

When I think back on all the people I told, how many of them knew well and humoured me? Oh the shame.

mr.wiggle

Hrududu wrote: »

Years ago a friend told me a great story about something that happened to a friend of hers. So for years I told it to others, telling them it happened to a friend of mine. I recently found out that its actually an anecdote taken from a pretty popular book.

When I think back on all the people I told, how many of them knew well and humoured me? Oh the shame.

Jesus.. it bloody better be a good story now that you've built it up??
Come on , out with it....

buyer95

Eroticfishcake wrote: »

A friend of a friend was fapping in his bedroom to a bit of porn, had his headphones on and you will not believe this. When he finished there was a cup of tea that his mam had left on the bedside locker :rolleyes:

Lol, this was robbed from another thread!

Karona

A friend of my brothers girlfriend went off to volunteer in a poor country. When she got there she saw a little dog that was mad skinny and she felt sorry for the little thing. She grew to love the dog and when it came to coming back home she brought the dog home with her.

She decided to find out what breed the dog was so she brought it to the vets where the vet told her it wasn't in fact a dog but a very large rat.

True Story.

bowsie010

What about the old "friend of a friend" went to a new chinese in town and got a microchip from a dog lodged in his tooth.

True Story.

strobe

One I heard goes thusly:

"So man, last month on a Saturday night we were round at Johno Swayne's house having a few drinks. Pauly was there, ye know the mad bastard from Killinarden with red hair? Anyways, he had a few hits of acid with him, gave a couple out and took the other three himself. About 3 in the morning and he was tripping out of his mind and says he's in too much of a mess and is going home, so off he goes out the door determined to walk all the way home, so we let him at it.

About an hour later my phone rings and it's Pauly. He starts talking down the phone to me saying I have to come round to his place. Saying he caught a fucking goblin and has it trapped in his bathroom and we need to come round and see it. So I was just laughing my ass off saying "yeah yeah, goblin, ok, go to bed man" and I hang up. Then he rings back three more times telling us that the goblin was banging on the door and asking to be let out. Total mess, so I just stopped picking up.

I didn't hear from him for a week after that when I got an explanation. He told me he woke up the next afternoon and was lying on his couch contemplating how twisted he must have been to be imagining goblins. Then he hears a bang on his bathroom door. Nearly jumps out of his fucking skin. So he goes to the bathroom, braces himself, then twists the key and throws open the door...

Standing there in front of him is the little Downs Syndrome kid from up the road. Apparently he'd seen him standing in the porch of his house, thought he was a goblin and went in and 'caught' him.

Said he just dropped him off back outside his house and has been waiting for the shades to knock on his door and arrest him for kidnapping since...

True story man, not a word of a lie. Fucking red Pauly. What a mess."

Eroticfishcake

buyer95 wrote: »

Lol, this was robbed from another thread!

Nope it happened to my friends friend :rolleyes:

notwise

Has anyone ever heard this one?! It was actually a friend of a friend of a friend so I have to be sceptical but I still love it!!

this girl is out in Limerick (apparently) one night and gets with this really nice guy. They hit it off and she ends up going home with him.
Next morning he has to work and sleeps in so he's rushing to get ready and he says to her just sleep on and let yourself out and write your number on a piece of paper so i can ring you.
So she got up anyway and is getting ready to go, delighted with herself as she really likes this guy!
Goes to the bathroom and ends updoing a huge poo that wont flush. She tries and tries but can't get rid of it.
In the end she really needed to get going so she decides to scoop it up and put it ina plastic bag and take it with her.
So she writes a little note with her number and a "call me" and out she goes.
But she forgot to take the bag of poo which she left beside her little note!!

If anyone knows that girl pls confirm to me that it's true!!

gav86mn

I heard recently about a girl who ate some chickem from dunnes/tesco and got worms.The worms even ate some of her liver. true story as far as i kno

Big Nasty

Chap scores this chick on a night out and goes back to hers for the rattle. Wakes up the next morning and she's disappeared and so has his clothes. In revenge he sh!ts all over her gaff only for her to return with breakfast and his laundered threads. :eek::eek::eek:

gav86mn

Starla_o0 wrote: »

http://www.snopes.com/risque/juvenile/lobster.asp

i swear this happened to a friend of a friend!

holy $hit, unbelievable!

sensibleken

threre was a 'stupid things americans say' thread and 4 people claimed to know a taxi driver who were asked what the beeping at traffic lights were for. when told it was for blind people they remarked it was crazy that we let blind people drive.

Immaculate Pasta

I heard a great story from a Kenyan who I was working with last summer about two of his friends who got deported from Britain.

Now in Kenya they eat goats. Friends of his were living next to this English couple who kept a goat as a pet. Anyway they went away for the weekend and asked their two Kenyan neighbours if they could watch and feed the goat while they were away for the weekend. You can probably tell where this story is going by now - it's like asking the Koreans next door to look after your dog. Anyway the weekend the English couple were away happened to be the date the Kenyans would celebrate a festival of some sort from their tribe back home. During this festival it is customary to kill a goat. The Kenyans decided that they would try and re-enact this celebration in England. They decided to lead their neighbour's goat to the upstairs bathroom where they slit the goat's throat in the bath (by this point this Kenyan who was telling me the story went off in a tangent complaining how the homes in England don't have a suitable place to sacrifice a goat if you wanted to while the homes back where he lives in Kenya do but that's a different story). After draining the blood from the goat, they then skinned it and ate the meat as a celebration.

Sure enough Sunday evening comes round and the English couple come back from their weekend away and are surprised to not see their pet goat at home. They go round to ask the Kenyans what happened to their pet goat who immediately deny all knowledge of its whereabouts and said it ran away. Now they would have gotten away with it if the Kenyans hadn't decided to hang the skin of the goat out on the washing line in their garden! The English couple, understandably upset, rang the police who promptly arrested the Kenyans for killing their neighbours pet and were consequently deported back to Kenya.

I learnt from this guy that apparently dozens of Kenyans get deported from Britain every year for doing this. They steal someone's goat, eat it, get found out then get deported. It just amuses me the image of packed planes of Kenyans getting sent back from Britain every year. The passengers on the plane all asking each other "So did you kill a goat then?" "Yeah..."

Sam Vimes

rebel10 wrote: »

Best one I have heard of was a friend of mine telling me that a friend of a friend had gone to Amsterdam for a hen. Had just broke up with her boyfriend, feeling kinda blue, ended up kissing a lovely Dutch boy in a club. He suggests going back to his, she says no, reluctantly, off she goes with her friends back to the hotel. A few weeks later she finds a weird rash all over her face. Not going away, so she decides to visit the doctor. The doctor, horrified, immediately said go straight to CUH to see specialist. The specialist, shocked, informs her that she has 'black lice' which can only got from being in direct contact with rotting corpses. Goes home and remembers the boy. Decides to get in contact with the gardai. They inform the Dutch. Interpol launch a search. Man is found and apartment is searched, five dead women discovered.
Now, I nearly vomited when I heard this story, she even told me the girls name and the town where she was from! I told a girl at work and she said she heard the same thing years ago about a girl from the north.
Still gross though. Puts me off kissing randomers!:p

The story doesn't even make sense. If you can only get black lice from direct contact with rotting corpses and she had no direct contact with rotting corpses then she can't have black lice

sensibleken

Sam Vimes wrote: »

The story doesn't even make sense. If you can only get black lice from direct contact with rotting corpses and she had no direct contact with rotting corpses then she can't have black lice

that and black lice dont actually exist