What happens after you give birth

Hobbitfeet

Hi so I'm having my baby in Sligo maternity and just wondering what happens after I give birth? What routine procedures are given to baby and mum? What usually happens?
I am writing my birth plan so would like to have an idea of what hospitals do routinely after birth to make sure there is nothing I don't want or some things I do want.
Thanks

January

Baby gets a shot of Vitamin K, so if you don't want that, or you want it given orally put it in your birth plan. Also, they usually give you an injection of syntocin to help deliver the placenta quicker, so again, if that's not wanted and you want to birth it in your own time you need to put that there too.

They asked me when I gave birth to my second daughter whether I consented to both before they happened though so you might be ok.

nicowa

Best to talk to the midwife next time you're in or at your antenatal classes. Both of what was mentioned need consent (like everything else in medicine) but there are reasons for both and both are seen as a necessity.

Ayla

+1 to what January said.

Other than that, your time in hosp is up to you. Immediately after the birth you're free to have shower & bonding time w/ babe (assuming no post-delivery conditions preclude them) and I found the midwives & staff at Sligo very supportive. Tea/toast were offered after each of my births, and then they helped me get settled at my bed.

If you choose to stay at hosp, the consultants will be around one time each morning to check on you & babe, and the rest of the day is up to you. They offer formula if you want it, or they leave you to breastfeed if that's what you choose. If you need help, ask for it.

I was rhesus negative so before I left hosp they offered the anti-d injection, which I was free to take or leave.

I found visiting hours to be very open - dad could be there just about all day (except exclusion hours of 1-3pm). When I was there (2 years ago now) we could have whatever visitors I wanted as long as it didn't get out of hand, and there was a day area where you could go w/ babe if you wanted to get out of the room.

I've said this before & I hope you're finding it the same as you become more familiar with Sligo...the staff there were very professional and helpful if you need it but would butt out if you didn't. Sure I had some nurses/midwives give me contradicting advice re: cosleeping, etc, but they didn't have any "policies" that would prevent me doing what I wished.

there are reasons for both and both are seen as a necessity

Re: the syncotin injection, that is done purely for convenience and is not necessary unless there is an overriding situation that they need to manage. It is not (in most cases) a necessity.

qwertytlk

I gave birth in the rotunda but id imagine its pretty much the same in most hospitals. When baby came out they put him on my chest for a min then took him over to the examination table and checked him over, while that was happening i had the injection for the placenta then the midwife helped to give me a little wash while the doctor fixed me up (i had an episitomy so needed stitches) while that was being done dad had baby. Once they were finished with me they brought tea and toast and put baby on my chest for some skin to skin. They left us for about 30mins to an hour like that. Then thet brought us up to the ward where the midwife on duty helped settle us in to bed and tried to help me breastfeed. I was told i could go for a shower but decided to leave it for a while, so they pretty much left us to it,which i hear is what most hospitals staff do so if you have a question or need help with anything, do ask. Hope that helps. Best of luck. Btw, didnt mention vitiaman d shot etc as its already been said.

Hobbitfeet

Thanks guys. I knew about the vit K not having the injection. I will be having delayed cord clamping after research and talking with Obstetrician from another hospital I don't think its necessary. Also will be having natural 3rd stage labour.
Just wondering if there was any other injections or drops given straight after birth?

Ayla I'm finding the hospital fine so far only been for 1 check up and my scan have another check up start of October. Have heard good things about midwives there which makes me feel better my main worry about labour is being in hospital and not in control or pushed to be part of uniform system with time constraints if you know what. I trust midwives know what they are doing but I also trust my body and knowing how I feel and the research I have done. I was trying to have homebirth but wasn't able to get a midwife. The good comments I've heard about Sligo are making me feel a lot better

Ayla

Hobbitfeet wrote: »

Also will be having natural 3rd stage labour.

Try to remind yourself that labour is a normal but very natural experience, and as such doesn't always go by your plan. It will help you enormously if you think "i will try to have a natural 3rd stage labour" instead of "I will be having." I am not being dramatic here, I also very much wanted a homebirth but instead did perfectly fine in hospital. I had the experience I had hoped (not *planned*) for and did not have even a drop of drugs/gas or forced anything.

Just do yourself a favour and hope for instead of plan on anything...that way if anything unexpected does happen you'll be more flexible.

Just wondering if there was any other injections or drops given straight after birth?

As mentioned before, the synoctin and vit k are the only injections offered post birth, and both are refusable. Also, leaving the cord to stop pulsing is acceptable (happened on my first b/c it was in my birth plan, but on my second they just did it automatically b/c i was only in hosp for 15 mins & there was neither time nor inclination to talk birth plans)

my main worry about labour is being in hospital and not in control or pushed to be part of uniform system with time constraints if you know what. I trust midwives know what they are doing but I also trust my body and knowing how I feel and the research I have done.

My experiences at Sligo were very positive...I never felt under any time pressure (ie: you're not progressing fast enough, etc) and all of the staff both before and after the birth were all very supportive of my decisions. During both labours they did offer pain meds, but did not even blink when I refused them...they mentioned them only in case I had changed my mind.

I know that the concerns over hosp has been on your mind for awhile now, but I cannot say enough that - if your labour is anything like mine were - Sligo will fulfill all of your hopes for a happy day.

Evil-p

I just want to reiterate what Ayla has said. A birth plan is fantastic and positive projection is too but allow some wiggle room. My labour got very complicated towards the end and I have to have certain interventions. I had intended to have a pain relief free labour but that didn't happen and I wasn't a bit concerned about it. But I have had friends that have felt very let down by their labour experience as it was not as they had hoped.

Also just in case it is your intention, I breastfed no problem after an epidural and pethidine. I know sometimes pain relief can cause problems but it didn't for me.

Congratulations on your pregnancy and I really hope your labour goes as planned. It is the most amazing experience!

implausible

Ayla wrote: »

Just do yourself a favour and hope for instead of plan on anything...that way if anything unexpected does happen you'll be more flexible.

+1 on this OP, so many things can happen in labour that it is impossible to plan it 100%. I ended up having an emergency section and I found it really upsetting as I had such a set idea about how things would go and never thought in a million years that I wouldn't have a natural birth. It's great to have a plan, but it's also good to be prepared in case that plan doesn't work out.

qwertytlk

Hobbitfeet wrote: »

I will be having delayed cord clamping after research and talking with Obstetrician from another hospital I don't think its necessary. Also will be having natural 3rd stage labour.

its good that you know what you want and having a birth plan certainley makes it all feel a bit more organised and that your wishes and concerns arwe being heard. I also had a birth plan but a few things happened in my labour that made some of the things on my birth plan impossible so my advice to you would be to try think of it as a list of things you would like to happen and be prepared for the fact it may not go as planned. Otherwise you may feel let down. I hope im not speaking out of turn in saying that, i just dont want you to feel like i did when it all went out the window! For example i really did not want an episiotomy or an instrumental delivery,but it turned out i had to have both.. Anyway Best of luck:)

How Strange

After my sons birth, the midwives let the cord stop pulsating and even got me to touch it so I could feel it stop before they cut it. In hindsight (because it was all a blur at the time) I was very grateful that they did. I had it in my birth preferences though. I got the synoctin (sp?) injection; I hadn't mentioned a preference in my plan, I'd only used gas and air during labour so I was exhausted. I delivered the placenta in minutes after. I consented to the vitamin k shot. My husband held our son while I was stitched. Then they took my son away to do a test as he was delivered 18 hours after my waters broke. I had a shower then we had some tea and toast. My son was brought back and a midwife latched him on. We were brought to the ward about 2.5 hours after delivery. Only my husband was allowed to visit for the 3 days I was there but I was getting used to breastfeeding so was very glad of the privacy. My husband could only visit during visiting hours otherwise it was just my son and I getting to know each other. That was in the Coombe.

Hobbitfeet

Thank you everyone for your comments all are helpful I feel the more prepared I am mentally, emotionally and physically that better my birth experience will be and the less likely any complications and interventions will be but of course I know that birth can be unpredictable and things don't always go the way they should no matter how much you prepare, that's just life and nature.

I really am feeling better about going to hospital the more good things I hear about Sligo. I haven't actually heard a bad story about the midwives and care there. I keep hearing how the midwives treat everyone and their birth as individuals which is great. I have never been in hospital before and think this has some to do with my fear.

Thanks again for all your comments

Cottontail

Hi Hobbitfeet, I am also due to give birth in Sligo General around end dec/beginning of Jan. I had my little boy there nearly 2 years ago and I had a good experience. After the birth the baby was taken away, cleaned up etc and then given back to me. Me and my husband were then given tea and toast and left for about 2 hours in the delivery room before being transferred to the maternity ward. I also had a shower during this time. I was in a room of 6 beds but I'd say for most of the time I was there there was only about 4 of them occupied at any one time. The maternity ward gets closed down for about 3 hours a day (12pm - 3pm I think..) for mothers and babies to rest. Overall my experience was very good, at the time I was vegetarian and the catering staff went out of their way to make sure I got nice meals etc. I had to stay in for 5 days due to a couple of minor issues but was always treated very well and the nurses were always around to help or for advice day or night if you rang the buzzer.

I hope your experience will be as good as mine was. If you want to ask about anything specific I'll answer as best as I can.

Hobbitfeet

Thanks cottontail. How long was baby taken away for? Was he taken to another room? I don't really want baby taken away or washed can be wiped clean but would like to hold off on washing until we have left the hospital.
Do you know how soon you are allowed to go home if you have no problems? We are living only 5 mins from hospital and I would prefer to be at home

Cottontail

I don't actually remember how long he was taken away for - sorry! I think I was still a bit high from the birth and the gas and air, but it wasn't long. they cleaned him up and dressed him in the little babygro we had for him etc. I don't think he was taken to another room but again I can't really remember (damn drugs )

I saw people in the ward coming in and going home the day after so I'd say if they give you the all clear then you're probably free to go home the next day but it might be best to check with the hospital on that one. If you go to the ante natal classes you could ask the midwives there, or if you meet some of the midwives in an ante natal appointment you could ask them.

How Strange

I don't think they wash babies anymore as it's now generally thought that the vernix is good for conditioning their skin. I know my son only got a wipe down and had his first bath in his second day in hospital.

Hobbitfeet

How Strange wrote: »

I don't think they wash babies anymore as it's now generally thought that the vernix is good for conditioning their skin. I know my son only got a wipe down and had his first bath in his second day in hospital.

Good yes the vernix is very good for newborn skin and is antibacterial so good for keeping all those germs away especially in hospital

Ayla

For both of my girls, as soon as they were out the midwife put them right on my belly where they sat until the cord was done. After that there was a very minor rub down (just to get the worst off) and then the babe was put right back on me. My hubby & I dressed the girls, but that was probably at least 30 mins or so after birth and was at our own discretion.

As far as bathing, I asked a nurse to show me how on my first before we left hosp, but even that was a couple days after birth. I don't think I bothered w/ my second girl b/c I had the logistics worked out by then. If you didn't ask for help you didn't get it, so if you don't do a bath before you leave no one will even notice.

As far as when you can leave, I was under the impression that you could leave as soon as you wanted to assuming there were no medical issues they wanted to monitor. That meant that as soon as you & babe are examined by consultant (be that an hour later or the next day as you're under the schedule of the medical team) you can leave.

Ayla

Ayla wrote: »

+
Re: the syncotin injection, that is done purely for convenience and is not necessary unless there is an overriding situation that they need to manage. It is not (in most cases) a necessity.

Not true, it has nothing to do with "convenience" and everything to do with hugely decreasing the risk of post partum haemorrhage.

Edit: Source if anyone's interested.

January

Where is that source from JamesL85?

Ayla

Deleted User wrote: »

Not true, it has nothing to do with "convenience" and everything to do with hugely decreasing the risk of post partum haemorrhage.

Edit: Source if anyone's interested.

Oh good, here we go again. :rolleyes:

If I'm reading that chart right James, it appears to me that this huge risk you are noting is actually a Relative Risk between 0.1 and 1 on a scale of 10. Wether those numbers are a scale or a percentage is not clear, but regardless, less than 1 is surely not a huge risk. Let's not go scaremongering here.

wmpdd3

I was very happy with the treatment we got in hospital after my daughters birth. She was examined by the doctor (as she was early) put on my chest. Then lightly rubbed down and dressed.

The only part I hated was the midwife washing me. It was mortifying. I couldn't make it to the shower. This time I've told my partner thats his job.

Also I dont drink tea, so bring you own nice drink into labour if you dont too.

We were left in the labour room for about 45 mins. The nurses couldnt do enough for us.

Hannibal Smith

I don't remember who dressed my son...how awful is that :eek:

He was just taken away and brought back in a while later, I can't even remember if he was dressed at that stage or just in a blanket. The only thing I do remember is I asked the midwife if he was okay and she said 'well we wouldn't have brought him back to you if he wasn't' :rolleyes::D

January

January wrote: »

Where is that source from JamesL85?

It's from a meta-analysis of five different trials that was carried out by the cochrane library. Read more here.

Ayla

Ayla wrote: »

Oh good, here we go again. :rolleyes:

If I'm reading that chart right James, it appears to me that this huge risk you are noting is actually a Relative Risk between 0.1 and 1 on a scale of 10. Wether those numbers are a scale or a percentage is not clear, but regardless, less than 1 is surely not a huge risk. Let's not go scaremongering here.

A relative risk of .1 means something is ten times less likely to happen. I know that graph isn't very clear. This table is a bit easier to read. Basically active management of the third stage reduces the risk of PPH by about two thirds. If you look at the NNT (numbers needed to treat), it shows on average hom many patients you need to treat to prevent a PPH. It's 12 for PPH >500ml and 55 for PPH >1000ml.

Those may seem like good odds to you, but you have to remember that PPH is a potentially life threatening emergency. The blood flow through the uterine arteries is 600ml per minute. At that rate a woman will bleed to death in just over five minutes.

If we take CUMH, the busiest maternity hospital in the country as an example, with 9000 deliveries a year and imagine the scenario if women weren't offered active management of the third stage. It would mean that on average, two women per day would have a 500ml bleed, and 2 a week would have a 1000ml bleed.

Yes, PPH can be stopped, but prevention is a lot better than cure as sometimes, once the tap has been turned on it can be very difficult to turn off and can require extreme measures, up to and including uterine artery ligation and/or hysterectomy.

You stated in an earlier post that active management of the third stage was only carried out for the sake of "convenience". It isn't. You have been misinformed and now you are misinforming others.

All these adverse outcomes, for what? Most women don't even notice the midwives/doctors delivering the placenta, as they have their babies in their arms and are happily bonding.

Ayla

Deleted User wrote: »

You stated in an earlier post that active management of the third stage was only carried out for the sake of "convenience". It isn't. You have been misinformed and now you are misinforming others.

Ok, fair enough. I was informed that it was a matter of convenience, which made sense to me. Through your insistence otherwise I've been looking into it a bit today and I can see your point. Doesn't mean I would advocate a standardised habit of actively managing everyone's third stage - there are too few studies done across the spectrum of women to determine whether it's necessary or the best thing for everyone.

Yes, PPH has claimed too many women's lives, but looking at the studies it is most always a problem in developing nations. Diet and anemia seem to be factors in PPH's cause, therefore since we're blessed to live in a nation of relative health and proper nutrition I would be suspect of these studies that say that active management [of Irish women] would reduce PPH by 2/3rds.

All these adverse outcomes, for what? Most women don't even notice the midwives/doctors delivering the placenta, as they have their babies in their arms and are happily bonding.

Now, for this I completely agree. The third stage after my first daughter was completely natural but the third stage after my second daughter was managed (no time to talk birth plans). Honestly, I barely remember either...small potatoes at the end of the day

sambagal

This is probably going to sound completely stupid, but I'm absolutely terrified of what's coming because I've never given birth before and I dot know what happens directly after baby is delivered. I'm due to deliver in holles street in march 2014 and have myself in a complete state at this stage because I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I will be on my own for the whole thing so don't have a birth partner or anyone like that. I'm sorry if it sounds really stupid but everywhere I read says that dad does this and dad does that, it's just me and my little bubs and I'm terrified

January

You have no birth partner at all? Would you ask a close friend or relative? It doesn't have to be your babies father or even another man.

How Strange

Would you consider getting a doula?

babygirlz

I have had 3 babies ad although my partner was with me I would have perfered to do it by myself.
The midwives are fantastic and will be there every step of the way.

sambagal

Hi there, thanks for answering me. No I have no birth partner at all. His family don't want to know because of our situation, you see he was married ad split up with his wife then we got together, they never wanted to know, we lost our first baby in January then I fell pregnant again in July. It came out that he had cheated on me with his ex wife and got her pregnant she delivered a healthy boy in September and me and him have split up, ed working things out with her so I don't exist anymore. my family don't want to know insofar as my brother and sister hasn't spoken to me for over a year and don't want to know. My mum and dad have said they will support me after the baby is born so I can go back to work but they don't want to be involved. I don't have very many friends but the ones I do, while they are great and supportive and really want to help where they can, they won't be in a position to be with me in march with work and their own families, so I really am alone and know nothing and am very scared because I don't know what happens as soon as she's born and what I have to do. Or what the midwives do. I'm sorry I know I sound really stupid but I'm so scared.

pwurple

sambagal wrote: »

This is probably going to sound completely stupid, but I'm absolutely terrified of what's coming because I've never given birth before and I dot know what happens directly after baby is delivered. I'm due to deliver in holles street in march 2014 and have myself in a complete state at this stage because I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I will be on my own for the whole thing so don't have a birth partner or anyone like that. I'm sorry if it sounds really stupid but everywhere I read says that dad does this and dad does that, it's just me and my little bubs and I'm terrified

It doesn't have to be the dad at all. Your own parents, a friend, sibling or doula would be fine.

Sweet_pea

I don't have a birthing partner either, was a bit worried about it too but actually feel pretty prepared for it now. My advice is to read up on your choices during the labor and have a clear birth plan,(although obviously they don't always go to plan anyway)

I've been told I won't be left alone at all once I'm in the labor ward, I'm on the domino scheme and so am lucky to have access to some lovely midwives.

I considered a doula as mentioned but can't afford one but if you are in position to then do have a look at them.

I know it's easy to freak out but really you can't afford too, you need to understand what can happen during labor so if something comes up you have some idea of what you want to happen.

Moonbeam

sambagal wrote: »

This is probably going to sound completely stupid, but I'm absolutely terrified of what's coming because I've never given birth before and I dot know what happens directly after baby is delivered. I'm due to deliver in holles street in march 2014 and have myself in a complete state at this stage because I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I will be on my own for the whole thing so don't have a birth partner or anyone like that. I'm sorry if it sounds really stupid but everywhere I read says that dad does this and dad does that, it's just me and my little bubs and I'm terrified

It will be fine,giving birth is the hardest part and I would bring a friend with you if you can just because it is a bit scary.
I have had 3 in Holles St and during birth the midwives are great. I am due my 4th in April and going to Holles St too.

nikpmup

I can't praise Holles Street enough, they'll really look after you during the birth. If you've any concerns, raise them straight away and they'll do your best to help you out. The midwives are lovely

Sligo1

sambagal wrote: »

Hi there, thanks for answering me. No I have no birth partner at all. His family don't want to know because of our situation, you see he was married ad split up with his wife then we got together, they never wanted to know, we lost our first baby in January then I fell pregnant again in July. It came out that he had cheated on me with his ex wife and got her pregnant she delivered a healthy boy in September and me and him have split up, ed working things out with her so I don't exist anymore. my family don't want to know insofar as my brother and sister hasn't spoken to me for over a year and don't want to know. My mum and dad have said they will support me after the baby is born so I can go back to work but they don't want to be involved. I don't have very many friends but the ones I do, while they are great and supportive and really want to help where they can, they won't be in a position to be with me in march with work and their own families, so I really am alone and know nothing and am very scared because I don't know what happens as soon as she's born and what I have to do. Or what the midwives do. I'm sorry I know I sound really stupid but I'm so scared.

Hi sambagal, I'm also giving birth in Holles st in March 2014. It willbe my second. I would really advise you go to the antenatal classes they provide there as these classes will tell you nearly everything you need to know. The midwives who deliver the classes are really approachable and you really can ask them anything. Just remember, every woman who has given birth initially doesn't know what to expect... Hmmm perhaps unless they're a midwife or obstetrician... But even then every birth is different. It takes a lot of reading or asking questions or talking to people before you will have an idea of what to expect and perhaps make a plan for yourself (if this is something you want to do). So you're definitely not being silly. You are on the right path to finding out what you can expect.

But definitely arrange to go to your antenatal classes. And of you can, really try to get some support. I know you say you are on your own... But have you asked your mother to be there with you? Would you like her to be there? A friend would be good either. You really won't know until you ask them. If a friend asked me to be her birthing partner I'd be so honoured. I really hope it works out for you. Congratulations and I really wish you all the best.

sambagal

Sligo1 wrote: »

Hi sambagal, I'm also giving birth in Holles st in March 2014. It willbe my second. I would really advise you go to the antenatal classes they provide there as these classes will tell you nearly everything you need to know. The midwives who deliver the classes are really approachable and you really can ask them anything. Just remember, every woman who has given birth initially doesn't know what to expect... Hmmm perhaps unless they're a midwife or obstetrician... But even then every birth is different. It takes a lot of reading or asking questions or talking to people before you will have an idea of what to expect and perhaps make a plan for yourself (if this is something you want to do). So you're definitely not being silly. You are on the right path to finding out what you can expect.

But definitely arrange to go to your antenatal classes. And of you can, really try to get some support. I know you say you are on your own... But have you asked your mother to be there with you? Would you like her to be there? A friend would be good either. You really won't know until you ask them. If a friend asked me to be her birthing partner I'd be so honoured. I really hope it works out for you. Congratulations and I really wish you all the best.

Thank you so much for the advice. I have asked mum and she said no. She wants nothing to do with it just like the rest of my family and none of my friends have time because of their own commitments. Baby's father's sister in law is a midwife in holles street so it's going to be horrible enough on my own but even worse if she is on duty.

I'm going to ring and book anti natal classes tomorrow and see what they say.

Sligo1

Gosh I really don't know what to say. This all must be very hard for you. With regards to your exs sister in law... Holles st is a large hospital with different wards so the chance of her being on the labour ward when your giving birth I would say would perhaps be slim. If she is on duty it would be unethical for her to have any part in your care if you do not want her to. I know this as I am a manager in a hospital myself. Everything is confidential so if you wish to have a confidential birth with no visitors unless you have given prior consent this is also a choice which will be available to you... Just ask the midwives about this.

Im sorry to hear your support system is somewhat lacking. And i can only imagine how scary this is for you. But when you have your little baby in your arms that is all you are going to care about and everything else will seem insignificant. Make sure you check up on the various support available to you before and after the birth. Mind yourself.

sambagal

Sligo1 wrote: »

Gosh I really don't know what to say. This all must be very hard for you. With regards to your exs sister in law... Holles st is a large hospital with different wards so the chance of her being on the labour ward when your giving birth I would say would perhaps be slim. If she is on duty it would be unethical for her to have any part in your care if you do not want her to. I know this as I am a manager in a hospital myself. Everything is confidential so if you wish to have a confidential birth with no visitors unless you have given prior consent this is also a choice which will be available to you... Just ask the midwives about this.

Im sorry to hear your support system is somewhat lacking. And i can only imagine how scary this is for you. But when you have your little baby in your arms that is all you are going to care about and everything else will seem insignificant. Make sure you check up on the various support available to you before and after the birth. Mind yourself.

It's hard, feeling lost and alone is very tough. I know the chances of running into her while I'm there is slim and she never even gave me the time of day the one time we met so She won't know me but I'll know her, and as soon as she sees my chart and sees my details she will know it's his baby.

I love how you put it somewhat lacking.... It's non existent. I don't have a support system.

January

I really feel sorry for you sambagirl. None of this is your fault and I'm sure you know that. I hope your family come to their senses before you give birth because they really are acting quite harshly towards you right now.

If you can afford to hire a doula I'd definitely look into that option.

Sligo1

sambagal wrote: »

I love how you put it somewhat lacking.... It's non existent. I don't have a support system.

Yea sorry about that... Wasn't really sure how to phrase it in a sensitive way.... I don't really know a lot about Pre and postnatal support systems in Ireland so can't really advise on this... Again, midwives should be able to advise you what available. Just mind yourself and I hope all goes ok for you.

Sweet_pea

Is there any chance you can get on the Domino scheme, they are really very supportive. They will go through all your options and can even help with counseling if you need it. Also, your GP should be good to talk to for any concerns. Hollis street have a great social workers (which would be completely confidential no matter who you know you works in the hospital) who can help with any practical arrangements.

Have a look at Aims Ireland and 42 weeks for more info on birthing. Also, I joined a pregnancy yoga class which I find great. They talk all about labor for the first part of the class every week so could be good for finding out more about it. Also, great for the relaxation part.

The sister in law can't have anything to do with your labor if you don't want her to.

Main thing is, is to start asking for help and guidance now, there is a whole world of it there for free. There is quite a few who don't have any immediate support and there is lots set up to help them.

How Strange

Some doulas offer their services for free in certain circumstances so look up AIMS and http://www.doula.ie and do a bit of googling and see what you can find.


I've seen trainee doulas offer a free service as part of their work experience.

Personally I can't think of a situation more deserving if a doula than yours.

Also hypno birthing may be good for you as your pregnancy seems to be very stressful. Look up http://www.gentlebirth.ie

You can sometimes buy the CDs second hand on adverts or other websites.