How far would you change your looks for a woman?

Corsendonk

Here we a have a good example of how meeting Miss Right can change how Mr Right looks. We started off with an aging former sports star with a pot belly caused by his love of meat pies, beer and junk food, you know all the good things that makes life worth living for the male of the species. Then one year later we end up with the results in photo 2 and 3. So how far would you change your looks for a woman? Lose a few Kilos, give up booze? Go under the knife?

Before


After

theteal

i'm made to shave every now and again. . . the b!tch!

Sardonicat

If she's going out with you and then decides she wants you to change your appearance to suit her you are too good for her. If you don't find someone attractive in the first place why are you going out with them?

I'm constantly amazed at the level of tolerance there is for women controlling their hubbies/bfs. In the reverse situation there would be uproar.

Corsendonk

Sardonicat wrote: »

If she's going out with you and then decides she wants you to change your appearance to suit her you are too good for her. If you don't find someone attractive in the first place why are you going out with them?

I'm constantly amazed at the level of tolerance there is for women controlling their hubbies/bfs. In the reverse situation there would be uproar.

True, I blame the Irish mammy effect, the girlfriend just replaces the mother dragging you around shops and picking your clothes out. Thats when the slide starts.

Otis Driftwood

Is that Shane Warne?

The fcukin state of him in the second and third photo,christ on a bike.

As for the question at hand,it really depends on the girl and what exactly she wanted me to do.

Things like getting more exercise or drinking less I wouldnt have a problem with because its good for you but things like trying to change the way I dress or anything like that then Im afraid no dice for you my love.

Wolfe Tone

Its not as if he is an ugly bastard in the first one, he looks grand to me tbh!


Eh, I might get a hair cut or shave, anything more would be strictly for myself and not based on what anyone else wants.

xoxyx

God - that guy looks better in the first pic than he does in the other ones.

But, on this topic, speaking as a girl, I don't understand the way some guys seem to think it such a bad thing to dress or do their hair for their girl.

Now, I'm my own woman and I have my own sense of style. But, having been with my OH for a few years now, I know what he likes and what he doesn't like. So, if we're heading out and I'm buying an outfit, I'll bear in mind what he thinks is sexy and take it into consideration. Just as if we were having dinner and I was choosing, I'd make sure it was something we both like.

I'm not talking about completely altering my style, but I would adjust it a little, perhaps, considering his views, which I value.

If a guy says to a girl that he prefers her hair worn loose, there's no problem. But when a girl says to a guy that she prefers him clean shaven, it often translates into her becoming a controlling weapon!

Another example. My guy loves me wearing high heels. And I've definitely do it on the odd occasion when, otherwise, I'd wear something lower. I do it because I love to look good for him - and he does the same for me (with sexy clothes though - not with high heels)! The next evening we may be slouching in front of the tv wearing pjs (or less! ), but I don't see the harm in continuing to make an effort to look good for your partner, and, if they suggest a difference in style or hair, or whatever, why not take it as good advice rather than jumping on the offensive??

Magic Eight Ball

She'd have to be a pretty special lady to get me to shave on any sort of regular basis. :pac:

Only if it benefited me.

Sardonicat

Corsendonk wrote: »

True, I blame the Irish mammy effect, the girlfriend just replaces the mother dragging you around shops and picking your clothes out. Thats when the slide starts.

So stop dating Mammy replacements. And stop letting your mammy pick out your clothes after the age of 15.

Maguined

Depends on the recommendation in question. If I am already indifferent to certain choice or style I wouldn't see much of a problem leaning towards the theoretical girlfriends preference but I would definitely not choose something I already had strong opinions on.

I had a large mole on my back that didn't bother me as it was on my back but my girlfriend at the time did not like it and suggested I get it removed, it was not a pushy or controlling suggestion at all and I figured I don't particularly want to keep it and she would prefer it removed so I went to my doctor and he arranged for it to be sliced off.

However no woman on this planet could convince me to start wearing skinny jeans, it is just a style I detest so would never wear them myself under any circumstances.

Will

It depends on the situation really. For example heading to a nice restaurant or event I'd don a shirt and tie if it was warranted. I've a few tattoos and piercings, I don't think I'd take them out just on the request of a girlfriend. It's very situational. In the past a girlfriend has never requested I change something about myself.

Logical Fallacy

A leave auld Shane alone, he is just trying to share Liz's interest in plastic surgery.

myflipflops

I'd probably agree to a haircut and maybe losing a few pounds. That would be about the height of it.

In fairness, Shane Warne was getting hair implants years ago, a long time before he met Hurley. He's just a vain guy.

guitarzero

Depends how sexy she is, if shes hot commodity then I'd do a few chin ups.

OldGoat

I never have and never will change my appearance for a woman. I'll do it for me but not for anyone else. It's my decision. I might seek advice and take opinion and I will listen to that advice and opinion but ultimatly any change is done for me as I am the person that needs to be happy in my own skin.

Is the bloke in the pictures known to have changed for a woman or did he just decide to improve his health? I don't know him or his history with the woman in the picture.

NothingMan

My ex hated a few items of my clothes. Generally the ones I'd had for 10 years and were thread bare and scruffy, so clearly my favourite items of clothing. My Mam tried throwing them out several times when I lived at home so no way I was getting rid of them now I was a proper adult in my own apartment. She also preferred my hair cut tight and my face clean shaven, I may have grown my hair a little messy and gone a few weeks without shaving out of pure stubbornness even though I agreed with her. In hindsight I could have been a better boyfriend.

Count Duckula

My girlfriend asks that I shave every day, because she thinks I look better clean shaven. And you know what? I have no problem shaving every day, because I want to look good for her.

If one day she decided I needed a new wardrobe and a totally different hairstyle, then sure, there'd be issues. But little things like being beardless or taking a little time to look smart for her aren't the mark of having a controlling girlfriend; it's the mark of a man who cares enough about his partner to look good for her.

Corsendonk

OldGoat wrote: »

I never have and never will change my appearance for a woman. I'll do it for me but not for anyone else. It's my decision. I might seek advice and take opinion and I will listen to that advice and opinion but ultimatly any change is done for me as I am the person that needs to be happy in my own skin.

Is the bloke in the pictures known to have changed for a woman or did he just decide to improve his health? I don't know him or his history with the woman in the picture.

A little background on Warnes transformation.

krudler

Very little, I hate being clean shaven so thats never gonna happen, havent been fully clean shaven in years, always have stubble or a trimmed down beard.

Suggesting clothes she might like the look of on you is fine as long as its not some crazy style change, no girl will ever get me into a pair of skin tight jeans.

I dont get wanting to change your partners appearance, it'd be the equivalent of us going "actually could you change your hair colour? I prefer blondes" date a blonde then!

Gandalph

Some people feel themselves to be too rebelious to do simple tasks such as shave for their OH? Thats what I call taking someone for granted, consider yourself lucky to even have someone

krudler

Gandalph wrote: »

Some people feel themselves to be too rebelious to do simple tasks such as shave for their OH? Thats what I call taking someone for granted, consider yourself lucky to even have someone

well why do some women insist on changing the guy they meet into the person they want instead of the person he is? I'm never clean shaven so its not like I'll just suddenly grow a beard she wont like, she'll never have seen me otherwise.

Theres a massive difference between taking someone for granted and letting yourself be told how to look and dress, no woman I know would change their appearance because a guy demanded it, why should we?

spiritcrusher

I don't think I'd be too bothered if a girl asked me to change anything. I like messing with how I look every so often anyway so I'd probably be willing to give most things a go. Only thing I'd be cautious about would be cutting my hair very short, I've usually kept it between long and mid length since I was about 17 (23 now) but I'd still probably chance it out of curiosity (grows back sure).
As of yet though no girl has ever said anything and I like to think I dress quite smartly most of the time :cool::pac:

Eve_Dublin

I think the only time I ever asked a boyfriend to change his appearance was when I used to ask my ex to brush his teeth more than once a day. I used to have to bargain with him: I'll stop burping loudly after dinner if you brush your teeth. God we were so hot...

cocoa

wow, by some of the responses here I'd assume that once in a relationship people are supposed to remain exactly as they were when it began, and people should only ever date people they consider utter perfection from the start.

mental...

beano345

krudler wrote: »

Very little, I hate being clean shaven so thats never gonna happen, havent been fully clean shaven in years, always have stubble or a trimmed down beard.

Suggesting clothes she might like the look of on you is fine as long as its not some crazy style change, no girl will ever get me into a pair of skin tight jeans.

I dont get wanting to change your partners appearance, it'd be the equivalent of us going "actually could you change your hair colour? I prefer blondes" date a blonde then!

im the same never clean shaven,i actually hate shaving with razors and just use an electric razor, though id probably compromise on this in a relationship as beard rash is painful for some girls.

hair is a different story, i have really curly spirally hair that i havn't changed in years and i think if a girl asked me to change my hairstlye its crossing the line a bit, though it could get a belt of a razor in the next while because greys are starting to appear

gargleblaster

I'd never ask a man to change his appearance for me, I'm not all that bothered about appearances. If he suddenly changed his style to something completely unexpected I might balk though. It'd have to be fairly radcial though - big flouncy blouses with ruffled sleeves a la Seinfeld, super baggy pants that show off your underwear, emo makeup - that kinda thing wouldn't sit well. I prefer the scruffy comfortable look (outside of formal events) so the more primped and polished look is one I wouldn't seek out in a guy.

Raze_them_all

Gandalph wrote: »

Some people feel themselves to be too rebelious to do simple tasks such as shave for their OH? Thats what I call taking someone for granted, consider yourself lucky to even have someone

I'm never clean shaven, if a woman told me to shave she can feck off, she was attracted to me with a beard she can feck off trying to change me.Same with my mohawk. I'm happy with who I am and what I look like, I'm not going to change.

ToniTuddle

beano345 wrote: »

though id probably compromise on this in a relationship as beard rash is painful for some girls.

Stubble can be very hot looking! Buuuuuuuuuut....
It literally rips the feicin skin on your chin and the end of your nose! :mad::( Leaves it fierce sore and sensitive and then there's no more kissing until it's better as it's simply too uncomfortable! Though if you are in a relationship with time think yer skin gets bit tougher and used to it but it's a painful process. Never kissed a dude with a beard so no idea if that would hurt...doubt it?

I'd never try to change a guys style or anything like that. Might end up buying the guy a tshirt or big cuddly hoodie that is little bit different to his regular ones...and if he doesn't like them, then I get to wear them esp the hoodie :pac:

Otis Driftwood

ToniTuddle wrote: »

Might end up buying the guy a tshirt or big cuddly hoodie that is little bit different to his regular ones...and if he doesn't like them, then I get to wear them esp the hoodie :pac:

How very noble of you Tuds.

:pac:

That_Guy

ToniTuddle wrote: »

I'd never try to change a guys style or anything like that. Might end up buying the guy a tshirt or big cuddly hoodie that is little bit different to his regular ones...and if he doesn't like them, then I get to wear them esp the hoodie :pac:

Why don't you just buy them for yourself then? :pac:

ToniTuddle

Otis Driftwood wrote: »

How very noble of you Tuds.

:pac:

That_Guy wrote: »

Why don't you just buy them for yourself then? :pac:

Oui! It's the thought that counts I've plenty hoodies but only 1 boys one. They are waaaay better. More cuddley and warm and yer hands don't even fit out through the arms sure that's feicin awesome :pac:


Na any dude I've dated I've never tried to change their style clothing or hair wise. If I'm with someone then it's because I really care about them and find them perfect just the way they look then and there. My mate used to give out about how they were dressed though!
Only thing I did try to change was their attitude to hating my "hippie" friends as they called them And to please shave every once in a while so I don't have my chin ripped up all the time. Compromise eh :pac:

cyrusdvirus

What is the problem with shaving???

I shave every day, and while it is a slightly formal office environment at work, I honestly don't find it a problem.

As for how far I'd change for a woman, it depends. There are certain colours that i cannot wear. Pale skinned with ginger (but mostly grey now) hair doesn't lend itself to too many colours!!
If she tried picking out stuff like that, i'd say no, simple as.

OldGoat

ToniTuddle wrote: »

Never kissed a dude with a beard so no idea if that would hurt...doubt it?

Well hello there Toni.
/Strokes beard meaningfully

Might end up buying the guy a tshirt or big cuddly hoodie that is little bit different to his regular ones.

My Darling Toni, I'm so sorry. It's not you, it's me...and hoodies. I was happy to try wearing the PVC, the latex was interesting and what you can do with a string of pearls is awesome but I just can't be seen wearing a hoodie.
I sure that someday you'll realise it's for the best that we end this here and now.
Forgive me.
John.

P.S. Can I have my Miles Davies CD's back?

Frank Black

Well, shaving is the main thing – the OH just don’t like the stubble and although I’ve long held dreams to grow a really great handlebar mustache, it’s not a deal-breaker.
On clothes, she doesn’t pick stuff out for me but I do like to get her opinion on clothes – the fact is she’s far more informed and has better taste than me so I value her opinion.
I can tell this because on mornings when she dresses the kids they look like beautifully presented children out of a Benetton poster.
When I dress them they look like miniature clowns who’ve let themselves go.

krudler

cocoa wrote: »

wow, by some of the responses here I'd assume that once in a relationship people are supposed to remain exactly as they were when it began, and people should only ever date people they consider utter perfection from the start.

mental...

this screams of "Im so glad somebody wants me I'll do anything to keep them happy including dressing how they want"

ICE HOUSE

Im like some of the previous posters. I had a great beard for about 15 years that I was so proud of but the OH made me shave it off and stay clean shaven. I figured it was best for my sanity, now I have peace no more complaining and Im saving a fortune on Anadin tablets

Malari

krudler wrote: »

this screams of "Im so glad somebody wants me I'll do anything to keep them happy including dressing how they want"

No it doesn't! I think cocoa is just saying that sometimes if a partner mentions you look good in blue or likes you with a bit of stubble, or your hair in a certain style that you might be more inclined to do those things as a result of being in a relationship than if you were not with that person.

Gandalph

krudler wrote: »

this screams of "Im so glad somebody wants me I'll do anything to keep them happy including dressing how they want"

No it doesn't!

It kinda does, but isnt that what relationships are about? Refusing to change things and acting like a child about it doesnt help anyone. I can guarentee there are alot of guys reading this going "Jesus I made alot bigger changes than just shaving for my OH, those guys should consider themselves lucky"

Im not saying just give in to your OH, that b*tch asks you to shave then you ask her to stay waxed, she says no you say no.

And if she crosses the line and asks you change underwear more than once a week then you better be getting laid more than once a week!

You scratch my back etc

OldGoat

"Yeah, she showed me what clothes to wear. She made me cut my hair. She picked out my shoes. She made me shave. She put me on a diet. She made me take up jogging. She made me quit smoking. Teeth whitened, eyes lasered...
She left me cos I'm not the man she fell in love with."

Frank Black

Surely most men would like the special lady in their lives to find them as attractive as possible. If this can be accommodated without wholesale ‘Shane Warne-like’ changes then why not?
The chances of getting me getting some sweet lovin’ are practically zero if I’ve 2-day stubble. So I guess the OH is controlling my appearance somewhat.
But I’m ok with this.

beertons

she shaves when i do

Malari

Gandalph wrote: »

It kinda does, but isnt that what relationships are about? Refusing to change things and acting like a child about it doesnt help anyone. I can guarentee there are alot of guys reading this going "Jesus I made alot bigger changes than just shaving for my OH, those guys should consider themselves lucky"

Im not saying just give in to your OH, that b*tch asks you to shave then you ask her to stay waxed, she says no you say no.

And if she crosses the line and asks you change underwear more than once a week then you better be getting laid more than once a week!

You scratch my back etc

Well I disagree that changing small things screams "I'm terrified she'll leave".

Interesting the theme of shaving! I like my boyfriend with a bit of stubble (rash notwithstanding) but he prefers himself clean-shaven. I've never asked him not to shave, but because he knows my (very slight) preference he sometimes doesn't bother.

ToniTuddle

OldGoat wrote: »

Well hello there Toni.
/Strokes beard meaningfully

Ya saucy mare! :pac:

My Darling Toni, I'm so sorry. It's not you, it's me...and hoodies. I was happy to try wearing the PVC, the latex was interesting and what you can do with a string of pearls is awesome but I just can't be seen wearing a hoodie.
I sure that someday you'll realise it's for the best that we end this here and now.
Forgive me.
John.

P.S. Can I have my Miles Davies CD's back?

And just like that you break my blood pumper so easily
You are NOT getting any of the recordings or the PVC back that's for sure!
I'll consider the Miles Davies CD's....but only after I've listened to them exactly 100 times and cried excessively while thinking about our lost love.

Goodbye John

*quietly sobs in a dramatic fashion*

OldGoat

OldGoat wrote: »

My Darling Toni, I'm so sorry. It's not you, it's me...and hoodies. I was happy to try wearing the PVC, the latex was interesting and what you can do with a string of pearls is awesome but I just can't be seen wearing a hoodie.
I sure that someday you'll realise it's for the best that we end this here and now.
Forgive me.
John.

P.S. Can I have my Miles Davies CD's back?

We don't want to know about you giving her pearl necklaces!!

Malari wrote:

No it doesn't! I think cocoa is just saying that sometimes if a partner mentions you look good in blue or likes you with a bit of stubble, or your hair in a certain style that you might be more inclined to do those things as a result of being in a relationship than if you were not with that person.

I agree with this - small adjustments are not making yourself over or changing who you are.

jaffacakesyum

I wouldn't go around changing a guys looks for me. If I'm with him, it's cos I like him for him. That's not to say, that buying/suggesting clothes or suggesting a haircut/shave etc. is a horrible thing to do. At the end of the day, I would like to look good for my boyfriend so I'd take into account if he liked me wearing particular clothes for example. At the end of the day it's my ultimate decision. Same goes for him.

I do think it's a bit ridiculous that guys won't shave for their girlfriends. :rolleyes: How would you like it if a girl refused to shave her legs/armpits etc.? I'm not saying everyone has to be completely hairless/clean shaven all the time. But it doesn't take much to put in a little effort to please your partner.

ToniTuddle

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

How would you like it if a girl refused to shave her legs/armpits etc?

Ha!! Never thought of it like that :pac:

fasty

My girlfriend bought me some stuff I normally wouldn't wear and I ended up liking it. It was like going on one of those makeover shows!

Logical Fallacy

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

I do think it's a bit ridiculous that guys won't shave for their girlfriends. :rolleyes: How would you like it if a girl refused to shave her legs/armpits etc.? I'm not saying everyone has to be completely hairless/clean shaven all the time. But it doesn't take much to put in a little effort to please your partner.

What if the guy enjoys having a beard?

krudler

Theres nothing wrong with suggesting something might look cool on a partner if you know its the kind of thing they'd wear and look good in, but I wouldnt go telling girls I'd prefer they wear their hair down rather than up, or wear dresses rather than jeans or always to make sure they wear makeup, you'd be killed. Whats that saying along the lines of every woman looks at a man and thinks about the guy she can turn him into.

jaffacakesyum

Logical Fallacy wrote: »

What if the guy enjoys having a beard?

What if the girl hates shaving and enjoys leaving her legs hairy?

I'm not giving out to guys with beards. I actually think they look sexy But I don't like kissing guys with stubble or beards. That said, I wouldn't force them to shave!! I just think the kinda guy I'd like to be with would be considerate enough to shave for me. I'm not saying every guy should shave for his OH. I just think it's not much to compromise.