Compulsive Liars

The King of Moo

Know anyone who just can't help lying in every possible situation?

I can think of a few people I know who lie constantly, ranging from tiny ones to the outrageous and impossible to believe.

Mostly the lies involved the usual: casual encounters with celebrities to numerous implausible sexytime encounters and beating people up for splashing them with water by driving through a puddle.

The best one I remember was A telling B's original very specific anecdote back to B, who had originally told it to A, in minute detail and claiming it as his own. B waited till he recounted the story back to him in its entirety till he revealed that it was his own story that he had told to A, to make it more excruciating!

I can understand lots of liars who lie to make themselves look better/boost their self-esteem, or to match what you've done, but it's the people who lie constantly without benefitting from it, who seem to be addicted to it that I can't understand.

People who say things like "I went for a nice walk today." or "I watched a film last Tuesday." when they haven't.

Biggins

The King of Moo wrote: »

Know anyone who just can't help lying in every possible situation?

There is a few obvious ones that jump immediately to mind.

starbelgrade

I don't believe that you have friends called A and B.

The King of Moo

starbelgrade wrote: »

I don't believe that you have friends called A and B.

I'm only friends with them as it's very easy to get from one of their houses to another.

pragmatic1

Yeah know a few people who are like that. Its just annoying more than anything else.

Stained Class

The world's 2 biggest liars meet.

Liar 1. 'I paddled up Niagra Falls in a wooden barrell.

Liar 2. 'I know, I saw ya!'

Big Nasty

Have a friend who does it a lot - harmless stuff really, nothing malicious.

E.g. went for a bit of a hike out to Dun Laoghaire, walked both piers and back (about 10km total) when he really just went for a ramble around Marlay Park (about 2km).

alwaysadub

Yep knew a girl who lied about everything, big and small, got a lot of people into trouble by making up stuff about them. Claimed she was pregnant and everything.
People like that really annoy me!!

LighterGuy

You will always encounter people who just cant help but lying.

I really wonder what goes through the head when telling such an obvious lie. They clearly must think the recipient is a total fool and would believe anything.

Muck Jack

I enjoyed reading this thread.

Wolfe Tone

Some people make up sh!te so they will have something to talk about. I know a lad who does and its great, always has something to talk about.

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

I hate people who do this, one of my former friends is like this and its so bad I can't even spend any time with anymore. He once claimed that Lucky Strike used to put a cannabis-laced fag in every 100th box and that he had found one. He often claims to have been present at events I know he wasn't.

Eric Cartman

The King of Moo wrote: »

Know anyone who just can't help lying in every possible situation?

I can think of a few people I know who lie constantly, ranging from tiny ones to the outrageous and impossible to believe.

Mostly the lies involved the usual: casual encounters with celebrities to numerous implausible sexytime encounters and beating people up for splashing them with water by driving through a puddle.

The best one I remember was A telling B's original very specific anecdote back to B, who had originally told it to A, in minute detail and claiming it as his own. B waited till he recounted the story back to him in its entirety till he revealed that it was his own story that he had told to A, to make it more excruciating!

I can understand lots of liars who lie to make themselves look better/boost their self-esteem, or to match what you've done, but it's the people who lie constantly without benefitting from it, who seem to be addicted to it that I can't understand.

People who say things like "I went for a nice walk today." or "I watched a film last Tuesday." when they haven't.

sounds exactley like a lad i know , hes mad for it , nobody ever points it out to him because its hillarious to let him continue, the stories get madder and madder ,everything from car crashes to women to drug taking , kind of sad really

have ran into a few women who "accidentaly" text you when theyre looking for attention or lie about being preggers too

The King of Moo

I just remembered a guy who used to work in a supermarket stacking shelves who used to claim to have been a supervisor in a nuclear power plant, but decided to quit as he wanted to do something different.

I remember another guy I knew vaguely telling stories literally for hours one night of the various brutal and bloody fights he'd got into, even though he wasn't a big guy and didn't seem particularly tough. He also claimed he'd only go out with one particular girl he'd always loved, was deadly serious when he showed me her picture. A few years later I saw him with a completely different girl, one I knew a bit. Not that he's not allowed to change his mind of course, it's just the way he told me about this dream girl was so dramatic it just seemed like such an act.
He also said he'd kill himself at the age of 30, must be close to that by now..

Frank Black

It's an Irish thing.

Like when we recount a story, sometimes we add bits in and change things around to make the story more interesting/amusing for the listener.

It's actually the height of politeness.

admiralofthefleet

my friend told me he was a compulsive liar but i dont believe him

van der vart

Muck Jack wrote: »

I enjoyed reading this thread.

why are you telling lies ?? your not enjoying it.

The King of Moo

Muck Jack wrote: »

I enjoyed reading this thread.

I appreciate your contribution.

Capt'n Midnight

A for Ahern ?
B for Bertie ?

What do I win ?

Big Nasty

The King of Moo wrote: »

I just remembered a guy who used to work in a supermarket stacking shelves who used to claim to have been a supervisor in a nuclear power plant, but decided to quit as he wanted to do something different.

Homer Simpson!?!:eek::eek::eek:

The King of Moo

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Homer Simpson!?!:eek::eek::eek:

Na, he was much better looking, more charismatic and successful with the ladies than Homer.
At least that's what he says...

Son Of A Vidic

starbelgrade wrote: »

I don't believe that you have friends called A and B.

It is possible you know, I have a couple of friends called JP and PJ.

whydoibother?

When it's small lies, how do you know they're lying. If someone said to me "I went for a nice walk today" I would never think to doubt it.

Big Nasty

whydoibother? wrote: »

When it's small lies, how do you know they're lying. If someone said to me "I went for a nice walk today" I would never think to doubt it.

Because if you know the person well enough you know they would never have done that in the first place.

OutlawPete

When I used to be a spy from MI6, we were on this mission in Hawaii (standard stuff, just rescuing some tourists that were being held by cannibal pirates) and our pilot, French guy with one arm, kept on and on about this time he apparently had a threesome with two women. With one arm? I don't think so mate.

whydoibother?

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Because if you know the person well enough you know they would never have done that in the first place.

Fair enough. I personally can't imagine being that confident about what someone else would do, but I can see how some people are good at it.

Kanoe

I think its just the Irish have a knack for exaggeration, I have a sister who is brilliant for it. the kid had a fit = the child sneezed a couple of times in succession.

The King of Moo

whydoibother? wrote: »

When it's small lies, how do you know they're lying. If someone said to me "I went for a nice walk today" I would never think to doubt it.

Usually I'd believe them, but there have been times when there's been other evidence to prove that that didn't happen though, like a mutual friend who was actually with them doing something else entirely.

That's the kind of lying I don't understand at all.

Stench Blossoms

My mother.

Drives me insane. I once wrote down every lie she told me one week and gave her the sheet at the end of the week.

whydoibother?

The King of Moo wrote: »

Usually I'd believe them, but there have been times when there's been other evidence to prove that that didn't happen though, like a mutual friend who was actually with them doing something else entirely.

That's the kind of lying I don't understand at all.

Yeah, I don't understand lying for the sake of lying either. I can see how "white lies" happen. If the person was doing something they'd rather keep private or if they know that telling you what they were doing will steer the conversation in the direction of something they don't want to talk about. That's slightly more understandable, but random lies for the sake of it is just odd.

crankycranky

Was sharing a house with a friend who used to tell stories that were obviously lies, he lied so much he actually started to believe his own lies.
mostly harmless lies, but I never got over how he himself believed them or
was so relaxed about with a group of people that it never occurred to him people would not believe his farcical stories.

Lost track of the amount of facebook profiles where I've seen some amount of **** posted. People deluded into thinking they are some gangsta rappers and they are young teenagers, people believing they are some kind of soldier of fortune cos they own a gun or replica and read combat magazines.

El Horseboxo

I lack the ability to lie ever since i missed my kids birthday party last year. It's crap. I used to be great at it. Won medals and all.

Dr conrad murray

the man that installed my internet and xbox live connections
claims to be able to hack into the pentagon

Scuid Mhór

alwaysadub wrote: »

Claimed she was pregnant

The mind boggles.

Scuid Mhór

Dr conrad murray wrote: »

the man that installed my internet and xbox live connections
claims to be able to hack into the pentagon

I did that and got arrested. True story.
:cool:

The King of Moo

crankycranky wrote: »

Was sharing a house with a friend who used to tell stories that were obviously lies, he lied so much he actually started to believe his own lies.
mostly harmless lies, but I never got over how he himself believed them or
was so relaxed about with a group of people that it never occurred to him people would not believe his farcical stories.

I've a friend who was similar, was constantly lying big and small. It got to the point that you could never believe what he said, and he got so used to doing it that he believed them himself. It used to be so funny when he'd get himself mixed up in his lies. He also hated giving his opinions in case people didn't agree with him, so he'd try to gauge what your opinion would be and tailor his opinion accordingly.
I remember one time me and another guy had two different opinions on a film, he didn't know what to do!
In fairness he does seem to have dialed it down a lot nowadays.

stovelid

I sometimes lie to strangers for a laugh if I'm drunk. Nothing major: often country and western type stories like my house burning down or my parents dying in a freak fairground accident.

W.Shakes-Beer

Know of two people who do this.

One of them usually tells the lies to avoid certain events (usually just coming into college).

The other tells the lies as a form of exaggeration but in a way that it makes them self or their possessions look impressive.


I enjoy listening along knowing they are clearly shíte-ing out of them. I usually nod and smile or else try catch them out with related questions.

Aoifey!

A friend of mine is in his first year in college, he's 19 but looks around 30. He decided one night he was gonna go out, find a bunch of random people, lie to them about his life, and see what happened. He found a bunch of 30 something year old doctors. He told them he was after doing a degree in Pharmacy and he had just completed a masters of some sort that week (can't rememeber what exactly).

They bought him drinks to celebrate all night and the next day he got a call from one of them offering him a job :pac:

W.Shakes-Beer

Aoifey! wrote: »

A friend of mine is in his first year in college, he's 19 but looks around 30. He decided one night he was gonna go out, find a bunch of random people, lie to them about his life, and see what happened. He found a bunch of 30 something year old doctors. He told them he was after doing a degree in Pharmacy and he had just completed a masters of some sort that week (can't rememeber what exactly).

They bought him drinks to celebrate all night and the next day he got a call from one of them offering him a job :pac:

Lies!

Adhamh

I used to know a guy who took it beyond the extreme. He'd say a small one and then build on it until someone would call nonsense, which nobody would do often.

A classic I remember was how he lost his virginity: walking home locked one night aged 15, he meets a cracking milf on the side of the road, brings her into some randomers front garden, rides her on the trampoline, the gardaí drive by, roll down the window and say 'fair play' (they know him because he does voluntary detective work down at the station, y'see). He's also survived assination attempts, banged ten chicks in a day, been threatened with extradition to the US for attempting to expose deep-rooted corruption, the list is endless.

He would normally finish a story by saying 'and then I met some chick and banged her ten minutes later', no matter what he was talking about. It was so routine he didn't even notice it. On one occasion, he boasts about getting his bit the previous night, then there's a lull in the conversation of about 20 seconds, the he says 'I really need to go out soon, I haven't pulled in months'.

Myself and a coworker joked about the idea of collecting these gems in a book entitled '****e My Coworker Says' but honestly noone would believe it.

The King of Moo

Adhamh wrote: »

I used to know a guy who took it beyond the extreme. He'd say a small one and then build on it until someone would call nonsense, which nobody would do often.

A classic I remember was how he lost his virginity: walking home locked one night aged 15, he meets a cracking milf on the side of the road, brings her into some randomers front garden, rides her on the trampoline, the gardaí drive by, roll down the window and say 'fair play' (they know him because he does voluntary detective work down at the station, y'see). He's also survived assination attempts, banged ten chicks in a day, been threatened with extradition to the US for attempting to expose deep-rooted corruption, the list is endless.

He would normally finish a story by saying 'and then I met some chick and banged her ten minutes later', no matter what he was talking about. It was so routine he didn't even notice it. On one occasion, he boasts about getting his bit the previous night, then there's a lull in the conversation of about 20 seconds, the he says 'I really need to go out soon, I haven't pulled in months'.

Myself and a coworker joked about the idea of collecting these gems in a book entitled '****e My Coworker Says' but honestly noone would believe it.

Fantastic, I love such outrageous lies!!
"I lost my virginity... then I met some chick and banged her twenty minutes later!"

Martyn1989

The King of Moo wrote: »

Mostly the lies involved the usual: casual encounters with celebrities to numerous implausible sexytime encounters and beating people up for splashing them with water by driving through a puddle.

The best one I remember was A telling B's original very specific anecdote back to B, who had originally told it to A, in minute detail and claiming it as his own. B waited till he recounted the story back to him in its entirety till he revealed that it was his own story that he had told to A, to make it more excruciating!.

I think we know the exact same fellas

The King of Moo

Martyn1989 wrote: »

I think we know the exact same fellas

Does the anecdote involve a concert?
If so it's most probably the same guys.

Martyn1989

black francis wrote: »

It's an Irish thing.

Like when we recount a story, sometimes we add bits in and change things around to make the story more interesting/amusing for the listener.

It's actually the height of politeness.

I think all Irish people are guilty of excaggerating for the sake of humour, even when the funny story is about you, you let it slide for the laughs involved

Caoimhín

I knew a lad who's mother worked in a sports shop, Champion sports or something.

He tried to tell us that she designed the Addias "Three Stripe" logo!

Fluorescence

I'm kinda like this. I lie about small, completely inconsequential things for absolutely no reason at all. I'm actually so full of bullshit, I'm surprised anyone believes anything I say at all.

Martyn1989

The King of Moo wrote: »

Does the anecdote involve a concert?
If so it's most probably the same guys.

Im not sure, cant remember the exact details of what happened between the two lads, defo sumthing theyd be trading stories of, trying to remember, do ALL of your b's stories start with "I was havin a smoke........" or (for variety ya gotta mix it up) "I was on the bus........"

My b's dad did sound for a led zep gig cuz they wer stuck one night lol

Aoifey!

W.Shakes-Beer wrote: »

Lies!

It's actually true, sounds pretty unbelievable though.

HazDanz

"Everybody lies" (House, 2004).

The King of Moo

Martyn1989 wrote: »

Im not sure, cant remember the exact details of what happened between the two lads, defo sumthing theyd be trading stories of, trying to remember, do ALL of your b's stories start with "I was havin a smoke........" or (for variety ya gotta mix it up) "I was on the bus........"

My b's dad did sound for a led zep gig cuz they wer stuck one night lol

I think they may be different, I don't know my B too well, but he seems like a pretty straight-up guy and I don't think he smokes .
It's A who's the big liar, or was anyway. And he doesn't smoke. Though he might lie and say he does... :rolleyes: