Tell me if Im being too harsh (I trust you people will)

Ellie2008

Bit of a rant after a glass of vino, I have a friend who is a bit of a looker not one of the best looking girls I know but very pretty and very small and slim. She's a great personality, very outgoing and charming. The one down side of her is when is comes to looks she really knows it and goes on about it a lot.

So we were out one night recently and I had been telling her I was a bit down in the dumps about things and have been to see a counsellor etc kinda thing and she said "Well you shouldnt wallow in these things it's self indulgent", that's how I feel anyways and then said a few more times it's self indulgent and some people would cut off their right arm to live the quality of life we lead and that's that. So I thought ok fair enough you're entitled to your opinion but then starting thinking of the amount of times she has rung me to obsess about some guy and how long Ive spent listening to this and often things dont work out for her but she'll literally always say "Well I know he really likes me" even in one case when someone actually told her he didnt so she never seems to get down about these things.

So that night after she had dismissed me by saying I was self-indulgent and selfish she started going on about how all the guys she works with flirt with her again and how she brought a friend into work with her and they all said "OMG your friend looks so much older than you" etc. Now my friend is very good looking but she defo looks her age so she starts going to me "Dont I look far younger then I am" etc and I said "Oh yeah a bit" hoping she'd leave it and then she told me I never pay her enough compliments, at this stage Im thinking why does it matter what you look like that's not why Im friends with you.

Nearly done! I think the last time I felt this strongly about her going on was after we came back from a holiday where we'd been shopping and she'd spent the whole time moaning that she was soooooooooo skinny and couldnt find any clothes small enough to fit, any shop we went into she'd try something on to prove it was too big and then come out and be like look at this! At the same time she pointed out that our other friend had put on a lot of weight and had I not noticed! So I remember thinking if you have noticed that why would you be so insensitive to go on and on and on about how you're so so skinny.

I mean Ahhhhh! I just want to say to her who cares no one else I know spends hours talking about how good looking/skinny/young looking they are and I know a couple of knockouts. Its affecting our friendship, not because Im jealous I have thought about that but I really dont mind that Im not as good looking as her and dont get male attention they way she does (and I mean that!) but because I resent being dismissed for my "selfishness" and then have to listen to who fancies her for ages and how good looking she is.

Rant over! Opinions please:)

danniemcq

can you do a tl:dr post?

Frank Spencer

What do you mean "you people"?

Ellie2008

Frank Spencer wrote: »

What do you mean "You people"?

Nothing insulting! After Hours people, who like a bit of humour thrown in whenever possible and are usually brutally honest, I appreciate honesty, if I wanted tres PC Id go to Personal Issues ( I hope that doesnt sound bad about Personal Issues!)

strokemyclover

Ellie2008 wrote: »

Bit of a rant after a glass of vino, I have a friend who is a bit of a looker not one of the best looking girls I know but very pretty and very small and slim. She's a great personality, very outgoing and charming. The one down side of her is when is comes to looks she really knows it and goes on about it a lot.

So we were out one night recently and I had been telling her I was a bit down in the dumps about things and have been to see a counsellor etc kinda thing and she said "Well you shouldnt wallow in these things it's self indulgent", that's how I feel anyways and then said a few more times it's self indulgent and some people would cut off their right arm to live the quality of life we lead and that's that. So I thought ok fair enough you're entitled to your opinion but then starting thinking of the amount of times she has rung me to obsess about some guy and how long Ive spent listening to this and often things dont work out for her but she'll literally always say "Well I know he really likes me" even in one case when someone actually told her he didnt so she never seems to get down about these things.

So that night after she had dismissed me by saying I was self-indulgent and selfish she started going on about how all the guys she works with flirt with her again and how she brought a friend into work with her and they all said "OMG your friend looks so much older than you" etc. Now my friend is very good looking but she defo looks her age so she starts going to me "Dont I look far younger then I am" etc and I said "Oh yeah a bit" hoping she'd leave it and then she told me I never pay her enough compliments, at this stage Im thinking why does it matter what you look like that's not why Im friends with you.

Nearly done! I think the last time I felt this strongly about her going on was after we came back from a holiday where we'd been shopping and she'd spent the whole time moaning that she was soooooooooo skinny and couldnt find any clothes small enough to fit, any shop we went into she'd try something on to prove it was too big and then come out and be like look at this! At the same time she pointed out that our other friend had put on a lot of weight and had I not noticed! So I remember thinking if you have noticed that why would you be so insensitive to go on and on and on about how you're so so skinny.

I mean Ahhhhh! I just want to say to her who cares no one else I know spends hours talking about how good looking/skinny/young looking they are and I know a couple of knockouts. Its affecting our friendship, not because Im jealous I have thought about that but I really dont mind that Im not as good looking as her and dont get male attention they way she does (and I mean that!) but because I resent being dismissed for my "selfishness" and then have to listen to who fancies her for ages and how good looking she is.

Rant over! Opinions please:)

I read that, honestly I did, but all that was going into my head was that trumpet sound that Charlie Browne's teacher used to sound like, sorry!

W.Shakes-Beer

Who really gives a shíte?

wyndham

Kiss her!

Dangerous Man

You can if you don't mind making yourself look like an ignoramus.

To the OP - my advice to you would be probably to move this Personal Issues if you want serious replies. Or, if you're comfortable with the AH crowd, my answer would be every once in a while to tell you friend to shut the fuck up. Seriously. Failing that, don't answer the phone as much when she calls; don't reply to every text / email either. Don't even so much as entertain the idea of giving her problems a level footing with your own.

Sometimes in life you have to be selfish - whether that be with your time, your money, or, in this case - your emotions. I would by no means say cast her off, but perhaps you should focus more on your on needs.

CreepingDeath

Ladies lounge -->

brummytom

She sounds like a fucking miserable whore


Give her a cake, tell her to put some weight on so she can fit into those clothes, then spread a rumour she's got AIDs. The bad AIDs.

ScumLord

danniemcq wrote: »

can you do a tl:dr post?

It's probably about shoes.

Biggins

W.Shakes-Beer wrote: »

Who really gives a shíte?

Someone with bowl problems?

Colilfc

Yes.

cucbuc

Hi, I don't think you are being too harsh at all, op. Your friend possibly has some great qualities as a person but she also sounds very self absorbed and vain. You needed someone to listen and sympathise and she was oblivious to that. Some friends are just better listeners than others.

danniemcq

ScumLord wrote: »

It's probably about shoes.

oh well in that case op wear them and pee down your leg

problem solved

pebbles21

I like babybel red cheeses...

orourkeda

Tell her to fack off

Ellie2008

CreepingDeath wrote: »

Ladies lounge -->

Ladies lounge! That's it! Too much abuse her already! Mods could you please move, pretty please!

Biggins

pebbles21 wrote: »

I like babybel red cheeses...

Jelly Babies for the win!

cml387

Ellie2008 wrote: »

After Hours people, who like a bit of humour thrown in whenever possible

I knew there was something missing.

Go ahead OP,get to the punchline,we're agog.

sheesh

omg!

El Guapo!

brummytom wrote: »

then spread a rumour she's got AIDs. The bad AIDs.

Like the monkey sex kind?? :eek:

Ellie2008

cml387 wrote: »

I knew there was something missing.

Go ahead OP,get to the punchline,we're agog.

Please Mods, Ladies Lounge! Im outta my depth!

UglyBolloxFace

Frank Spencer wrote: »

What do you mean "you people"?

What do you mean 'you people'?

Little Acorn

A person like her would do my fecking head in! Why don't you just turn the tables on her and say exactly what she said to you?
When she complains about not finding clothes to fit, or about all these fellas she's always on about, turn around and say exactly what she said, and say it in a very patronizing tone, "I think you're being self indulgent, no need to wallow in it, think of all the people who would 'give their right arm' to look like you or be in your situation" etcetera etcetera.....

Ellie2008

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

What do you mean 'you people'?

Ok I take it back!:rolleyes:

themadchef

Yee should lez out tbh....

Drop the hand on her, or cheeky boob grab and tell her that shes all you dream about.

When she runs away screaming, sit back and remember you'll never have to listen to the self centered, feckless twot again.

If she doesnt run away screaming.............. WIN

Biggins

sheesh wrote: »

omg!

I know, I get that reaction all the time from the ladies.
I've gotten used to it though.

cml387

Ellie2008 wrote: »

Bit of a rant after a glass of vino, I have a friend who is a bit of a looker not one of the best looking girls I know but very pretty and very small and slim. She's a great personality, very outgoing and charming. The one down side of her is when is comes to looks she really knows it and goes on about it a lot.

So we were out one night recently and I had been telling her I was a bit down in the dumps about things and have been to see a counsellor etc kinda thing and she said "Well you shouldnt wallow in these things it's self indulgent", that's how I feel anyways and then said a few more times it's self indulgent and some people would cut off their right arm to live the quality of life we lead and that's that. So I thought ok fair enough you're entitled to your opinion but then starting thinking of the amount of times she has rung me to obsess about some guy and how long Ive spent listening to this and often things dont work out for her but she'll literally always say "Well I know he really likes me" even in one case when someone actually told her he didnt so she never seems to get down about these things.

So that night after she had dismissed me by saying I was self-indulgent and selfish she started going on about how all the guys she works with flirt with her again and how she brought a friend into work with her and they all said "OMG your friend looks so much older than you" etc. Now my friend is very good looking but she defo looks her age so she starts going to me "Dont I look far younger then I am" etc and I said "Oh yeah a bit" hoping she'd leave it and then she told me I never pay her enough compliments, at this stage Im thinking why does it matter what you look like that's not why Im friends with you.

Nearly done! I think the last time I felt this strongly about her going on was after we came back from a holiday where we'd been shopping and she'd spent the whole time moaning that she was soooooooooo skinny and couldnt find any clothes small enough to fit, any shop we went into she'd try something on to prove it was too big and then come out and be like look at this! At the same time she pointed out that our other friend had put on a lot of weight and had I not noticed! So I remember thinking if you have noticed that why would you be so insensitive to go on and on and on about how you're so so skinny.

I mean Ahhhhh! I just want to say to her who cares no one else I know spends hours talking about how good looking/skinny/young looking they are and I know a couple of knockouts. Its affecting our friendship, not because Im jealous I have thought about that but I really dont mind that Im not as good looking as her and dont get male attention they way she does (and I mean that!) but because I resent being dismissed for my "selfishness" and then have to listen to who fancies her for ages and how good looking she is.

Rant over! Opinions please:)

You know what? I've read it again and the OP is Cecilia Ahern and I claim my 5 euro.

westendgirlie

Biggins wrote: »

Someone with bowl problems?

Keep putting laxatives in her drinks. Least the sh!te will be coming out both ends then.

Biggins

westendgirlie wrote: »

Keep putting laxatives in her drinks. Least the sh!te will be coming out both ends then.

Sounds like it already has! :pac:

Spore

Hug so that your boobs touch. Take a photo. Upload said photo. Let the fapping begin.

dj jarvis

i have a cabin in da hills and a spade - 50 euro and ill "make the problem disappear " , she thinks she is skinny now - wait till she spends a bit of time in my well

Gary4279

Ellie2008 wrote: »

r not one of the best looking girls )

Stopped reading after this

alexa5x5

Know loads of girls like your friend, they are a fooking drain to be around. Ask yourself, are you getting anything out of the friendship? Do you look forward to hearing from her? Do you ever enjoy being around her? If no, might be time to cut her loose, lifes too short for miserable people like this.

Bitchy option: Next time she starts doing your head in say “have you put some weight on, it looks good on you”. He he (evil laugh:D)!...ok bit harsh, don’t do that.

hondasam

OP have another drink and forget about it. Do you fancy her ?

ascanbe

UglyBolloxFace wrote: »

What do you mean 'you people'?

Smeggy

I used to have a friend exactly like that, she wrecked my head but then she moved away so I didnt have to do anything.




Sniff.

Ellie2008

dj jarvis wrote: »

i have a cabin in da hills and a spade - 50 euro and ill "make the problem disappear " , she thinks she is skinny now - wait till she spends a bit of time in my well

WTF!!! Mods - please please MOVE THIS TO LADIES LOUNGE -PLEASEEEEEEE, it was a mistake!

Solnskaya

brummytom wrote: »

She sounds like a fucking miserable whore


Give her a cake, tell her to put some weight on so she can fit into those clothes, then spread a rumour she's got AIDs. The bad AIDs.

Are you HIV positive this is good advice??? If it was me, I would keep on telling her she was piling on the weight, jasus you are getting really fat mate, have you started eating differently? That and recommend an anti-wrinkle cream to her, say it is good for crows feet, like those you are getting. She's up her own hole, so you mught as well fill her with sh1te.

pragmatic1

You used the word "vino" for wine. Didnt read the rest of your post OP. You're obviously in the wrong.

themadchef

Ellie2008 wrote: »

WTF!!! Mods - please please MOVE THIS TO LADIES LOUNGE -PLEASEEEEEEE, it was a mistake!

Looks like we broke another one


This is AH Ellie, it's all just a bit of craic. Pinch of salt. Dont take any of it to heart...

Oh, welcome to Boards.

Biggins

Ellie2008 wrote: »

WTF!!! Mods - please please MOVE THIS TO LADIES LOUNGE -PLEASEEEEEEE, it was a mistake!

LOL

Welcome to After Hours :pac:

Fools rush in where angels fear to thread!

Solnskaya

themadchef wrote: »

Looks like we broke another one


This is AH Ellie, it's all just a bit of craic. Pinch of salt. Dont take any of it to heart...

Oh, welcome to Boards.

Didn't take long either, too much practice probably.

Dwellingdweller

Narcissism, google it.

elefant

This is my first time, so I hope I'm doing this right...


Blast her with piss.

westendgirlie

Dwellingdweller wrote: »

Narcissism, google it.

That takes too long cant you just tell us?

hondasam

Ellie2008 wrote: »

WTF!!! Mods - please please MOVE THIS TO LADIES LOUNGE -PLEASEEEEEEE, it was a mistake!

stop whinging OP, you are embarrassing us tough women in AH

Unpossible

The opening post made my head hurt.

Ellie2008

Dear Mods,

I have been very good all year (ok some of it), can you please move this to the Ladies Lounge??? Please.....

Solnskaya

westendgirlie wrote: »

That takes too long cant you just tell us?

Its where you can't put up with another minute around an ar5e---n'arse,ism - the revulsion provoked by acting the ar5e.