Going to an Escort

Kevin joyce

Hi, i have not have sex since wednesday august 26th 1987, i am thinking about going to an escort, i have found a few websites and it seems easy to arrange a meeting with one, im just wondering what to expect when i go to their flat? Will there be pimp type men around or will the lady be alone?

billymitchell

Nobody on here has the money for escorts. Just have a **** and save yourself the cash

seanybiker

Surely with a name like Joyce you could just grab a youngone.

TeddyTedson

You could be my Dad...

MrStuffins

BrummyTom?

If you've been saving it for that long, my advice would be to head to Thailand for a 2 week holiday.. It'd feel alot less dodgy than dealin with pimps in Ireland.

we'llallhavetea_old

ask in the ladies lounge, you'll find better answers op. good luck!

flyton5

1987?!?!?!?!?!?!


You must look like some sort of gremlin....or Troll!!! :rolleyes:

smokie2008

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Hi, i have not have sex since wednesday august 26th 1987, i am thinking about going to an escort, i have found a few websites and it seems easy to arrange a meeting with one, im just wondering what to expect when i go to their flat? Will there be pimp type men around or will the lady be alone?

Come don't leave us hanging? Why do you remember the actual date so well.

Don't leave ANY details out, this is AH an we all wanna hear it....trust me!!

zuroph

dad?!!?!

brummytom

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Hi, i have not have sex since wednesday august 26th 1987

26 August

Births
1987 – Riley Steele, Pornographic actress


Quite ironic really

TeddyTedson

You might be my dad....

Cochore

Before you stab her with your rusty dagger, ask her if her tetanus shots are current.

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Did you catch the ghey?

Gummy Panda

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

ask in the ladies lounge, you'll find better answers op. good luck!

That's mean.

The girls in there aren't all on the game.

TeddyTedson

zuroph wrote: »

dad?!!?!

I see you've got there before me...but now I'm going to edit my earlier post to get above you:D

jd007

Try Person Issues Forum OP

Ricardo G

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Hi, i have not have sex since wednesday august 26th 1987, i am thinking about going to an escort, i have found a few websites and it seems easy to arrange a meeting with one, im just wondering what to expect when i go to their flat? Will there be pimp type men around or will the lady be alone?[/QUOTE]

I'd just go for the lady myself, those pimps may be too rough for you

t0mm13b

smokie2008 wrote: »

Come don't leave us hanging? Why do you remember the actual date so well.

Don't leave ANY details out, this is AH an we all wanna hear it....trust me!!

must have been his last time which guesses that it flopped!!!! :pac:

wait that was before the lil blue pill made its way to the market... oh hum

Fizman

I dunno OP, just ask one of the members of the Italian government what the story is.

ScumLord

Of course there'll be a pimp, someone has to stop them running away. There's no loyalty in the sex trade since they stopped using leg shackles.

Tilt Gone

I know a guard called Kevin Joyce. would be funny if this was you lol

macquarie

More water..

we'llallhavetea_old

Gummy Panda wrote: »

That's mean.

The girls in there aren't all on the game.

you know they are panda, all of them have a price, you just have to keep trying :P

Shryke

Kevin, if this is your real name you may very possibly regret using it here.
Anyway, well done on having sex in 1987!
If you're nervous about going to see a hooker then why not wear a fake mustache or possibly dress up in an animal costume. You might have to pay a little extra but it would be great fun. If you dressed as Big Bird you could flap your arms about while you're on top and make cawing noises. Women love that stuff.

smokie2008

^^^^^^^^^^^^^Take you fantasies over to PI mate, that way

---

>

zuroph

TeddyTedson wrote: »

I see you've got there before me...but now I'm going to edit my earlier post to get above you:D

You're such a Thanks Escort.

TeddyTedson

zuroph wrote: »

You're such a Thanks Escort.

:pac: I just work with what I have and adapt. If this was Business it would have been a good business move :P

Where To

OP why do you wanna 'get with' a car?

Dangerous Man

Gummy Panda wrote: »

That's mean.

The girls in there aren't all on the game.

Yes they are.

TeddyTedson

OP how much are you willing to pay for said escort?

Ricardo G

Would you "rub the lotion into her skin" or else "she'd get the hose" again?
You Buffalo Bill sounding character:D

Fizman

Granted many here will have gotten more action than you in recent years OP, fair play that you boned someone in 1987. I cannot say the same for myself.

Now that may have something to do with the fact that I was 4 years old, but needless to say you have that one over me.

Kevin joyce

TeddyTedson wrote: »

OP how much are you willing to pay for said escort?

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Ricardo G

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Crabs, aids, herpes, Cyphilus etc, whatever you want !!

starbelgrade

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Sex, I would imagine.

Sofaspud

Kevin joyce wrote: »

i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Chlamydia.

starbelgrade

Sofaspud wrote: »

Chlamydia.

Is that the name of the escort?

TheZohanS

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

You're in the wrong forum.

Ask in the Ladies Lounge.

Where To

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

:eek:

If ever a guy needed motivation for a sex change thats it

deathrider

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Good chance they'll raise a cloth towards your nose, asking if it smells like cloroform. Then you'll wake up naked and broke, and live the rest of your life on the streets... Might get a ride out of it though.

Ricardo G

starbelgrade wrote: »

Is that the name of the escort?

Candy Sweetbottom
Erika B low

TeddyTedson

........I could do with €300

starbelgrade

Here's a nice escort for you.

€1950 and she's yours for life. You'll get plenty of rides out of her too.

TeddyTedson

Maybe buy an asian bride or something for long term value

Ricardo G

starbelgrade wrote: »

Here's a nice escort for you.

€1950 and she's yours for life. You'll get plenty of rides out of her too.

With added bonus of being topless and a lovely set of...............wheels

SoulTrader

Kevin joyce wrote: »

Well the escorts i have seen on the websites the charge is 300 euro per hour, it also says on the website that they are independent escorts, i was want to know what to expect if i got to one of them?

Independent escorts? That just means they're not affiliated to a political party.

Dangerous Man

SoulTrader wrote: »

Independent escorts? That just means they're not affiliated to a political party.

There's worse. It also means that they're really only in it for themselves and will probably burn the feckin' ears off you about some poxy potholes in Listowel.

fat__tony

24 years without sex??

Christ you must have balls the size of the moon.

admiralofthefleet

brummytom wrote: »

26 August

Births
1987 – Riley Steele, Pornographic actress


Quite ironic really

did you see her in piranha? incredible

TeddyTedson

Anyone else think there is some poor fecker out there called Kevin Joyce who is having his name slandered through proxy.