A$$hole HouseMate

mikerowsopht

Another Housemate thread

My Best Mate rents his granny's house with 2 other guys so there are 3 in total. ( The granny was moved to a home as she couldn't look after herself anymore )

1 of them never does any work while the other 2 do all the work
The driveway can only fit 1 car so the other car has to be parked on the street. The 3rd guy doesn't drive so doesn't have a car.

Basically 1 guy is a complete moron who doesn't do any work.
Doesn't clean the kitchen
doesn't empty the bins
doesn't hoover, clean or do anything.
when he washes his clothes he dumps them on the livingroom floor or where ever there is free space

He lies about everything, forgot his keys before and punched in the front window to grab his keys & he was drunk at the time. At the same time my other mate who also lives there is walking back towards the house and sees him breaking the window

They confront him the next day but he just lies saying it wasn't him
He had a party while the other 2 were away and wrecked the gaff and it isn't even his granny

he's usually always 1 month behind on rent & all the bills
he refuses to pay for sky digital yet watches the TV and when the other 2 want to watch something he goes mad.

On top of all this he doesn't have an nct for his car or car tax
so he always parks in the driveway.

When he orignally moved in he paid 50euro a month extra for the driveway which he refused to pay now. I think guards can't come into your driveway and they live on a main road.

If nice person A is home first he parks in the driveway. Asshole B comes home, goes mad and parks out on the street but he parks his car so the back of his car covers the driveway as such.

When nice person A wants to go out he has to tell asshole B to move his car 2 ft forward, but of course he only parks like that so nice person A has to inform asshole B who immediately moves his car into the driveway as soon as the nice person A has pulled out.

so this guy really takes the pi$$ and we all hate him but he's so thick he just doesn't get it.

He also refused to help pay house insurance saying there's no point in him paying it coz he's moving out next month... but never does.

These 3 guys have known eachother since 1st year in secondary school and are now 26 - 27 yrs old so they know eachother very well which prob makes the whole situation alot worse

In a nutshell when anyone calls down to the house he is in 1 room and everyone else is in the other. When or If Asshole B comes into the room everyone moves into the other room, kinda funny.

So what can we do to get rid of this guy ? without pooing in his pillow or emptying bins in his bed etc....

Princess Peach

Deja-vu

phasers

Tell him to fcuk off?

ebixa82

mikerowsopht wrote: »

Another Housemate thread

My Best Mate rents his granny's house with 2 other guys so there are 3 in total. ( The granny was moved to a home as she couldn't look after herself anymore )

1 of them never does any work while the other 2 do all the work
The driveway can only fit 1 car so the other car has to be parked on the street. The 3rd guy doesn't drive so doesn't have a car.

Basically 1 guy is a complete moron who doesn't do any work.
Doesn't clean the kitchen
doesn't empty the bins
doesn't hoover, clean or do anything.
when he washes his clothes he dumps them on the livingroom floor or where ever there is free space

He lies about everything, forgot his keys before and punched in the front window to grab his keys & he was drunk at the time. At the same time my other mate who also lives there is walking back towards the house and sees him breaking the window

They confront him the next day but he just lies saying it wasn't him
He had a party while the other 2 were away and wrecked the gaff and it isn't even his granny

he's usually always 1 month behind on rent & all the bills
he refuses to pay for sky digital yet watches the TV and when the other 2 want to watch something he goes mad.

On top of all this he doesn't have an nct for his car or car tax
so he always parks in the driveway.

When he orignally moved in he paid 50euro a month extra for the driveway which he refused to pay now. I think guards can't come into your driveway and they live on a main road.

If nice person A is home first he parks in the driveway. Asshole B comes home, goes mad and parks out on the street but he parks his car so the back of his car covers the driveway as such.

When nice person A wants to go out he has to tell asshole B to move his car 2 ft forward, but of course he only parks like that so nice person A has to inform asshole B who immediately moves his car into the driveway as soon as the nice person A has pulled out.

so this guy really takes the pi$$ and we all hate him but he's so thick he just doesn't get it.

He also refused to help pay house insurance saying there's no point in him paying it coz he's moving out next month... but never does.

These 3 guys have known eachother since 1st year in secondary school and are now 26 - 27 yrs old so they know eachother very well which prob makes the whole situation alot worse

In a nutshell when anyone calls down to the house he is in 1 room and everyone else is in the other. When or If Asshole B comes into the room everyone moves into the other room, kinda funny.

So what can we do to get rid of this guy ? without pooing in his pillow or emptying bins in his bed etc....

You're the "other" housemate, right?

El Guapo!

mikerowsopht wrote: »

So what can we do to get rid of this guy ?

Well you did the right thing starting a thread on the internet first.

Princess Peach

Try having an adult conversation about the issues.

Cuddlesworth

Kill him. Solves all your problems.

mikerowsopht

No, I don't live in the house, I just enjoy watching the entertainment there.

senordingdong

Pics or GTFO

Princess Peach

mikerowsopht wrote: »

No, I don't live in the house, I just enjoy watching the entertainment there.

Well if you enjoy it, do nothing and sit back and watch the train wreck

PandyAndy

Well if they're all friends since 1st year then there should be no problems with being honest with each other and to say when 'Asshole B' is acting like a dick and if he keeps it up to kick him out. You said he's 27 so really he should just grow the fúck up and cop on.

Burn all his belongings!

thewing

Take a nightly dump in his pillowcase till he gets the message

Ruu_Old

Put his bed and belongings in the middle of the road.

Dravokivich

Think we need a house mates forum...

Mint Sauce

Dravokivich wrote: »

Think we need a house mates forum...

I think we do already

holystungun9

when he is out and drunk one night, follow him and when you get the chance bundle him into the boot your car. Drive out into the sticks and beat the living crap out of him, strip him of his clothes and poo on him. Tell him that you heard he hasn't been a very good housemate. When he returns and asks about it, lie.

mikerowsopht

Princess Peach wrote: »

Try having an adult conversation about the issues.

that would be impossible

MIRMIR82

Tell the other 2 lads its time to grow a pair and fcuk him out. Simples:pac:

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

thebigbiffo

step 1: grow up

step 2: act like a man

step 3: tell him you want him out.

seriously, you think you're the first guy in the world with an asshole housemate. just grow a set...

edit: obviously i'm talking to your 'friends' in the first person

jimthemental

Lad you're making more bad threads than most of us post these days, those two picture innuendo ones were useless.

And I do know this is hypocritical from me due to only having made one thread but feck it.

Reloc8

mikerowsopht wrote: »

So what can we do to get rid of this guy ? without pooing in his pillow or emptying bins in his bed etc....

Do you expect someone else to turn up and poo in his pillow/empty our bins in his bed ?

Do you think this will just happen if you sit down, close your eyes real tight and really, really, really, really hope it will ? Like a small child with no money staring into the window of a toy shop hoping that if they're really, really good some kind stranger will buy them that dolls house they always dreamed of ?

Do you think the rest of us, when we're not enjoying the fact that we actually have testicles and are busy crapping in our annoying housemate's pillows have the time and spare turds to call around to your friend's house, go upstairs and share the wealth in this guys pillow ?

Wishing isn't doing, and the sooner you and your mates get around to manning up and taking ownership of this guys pillow and bed the sooner you'll be able to sit down, crack open a couple of tins and laugh about the fact that he woke up with poo in his hair and a load of used sanitary towels and shampoo bottles (because you're worth it) where his teddy bear used to be.

jester77

Keep paying his bills and tidying up for him and it will be grand!

youcancallmeal

Just get the snip and don't tell them about it

Reloc8

youcancallme>al wrote: »

Just get the snip and don't tell them about it

'Things you would do to not have children, be dishonest to your partner and be posting in the wrong thread'

MIRMIR82

youcancallme>al wrote: »

Just get the snip and don't tell them about it

LOVE IT!!:pac::pac::pac:

ejmaztec

Dravokivich wrote: »

Think we need a house mates forum...

This thread would be better in the "I'm pretending that I have friends" forum.

faceman

Whatever you do, dont talk to him about it. It will just make things more uncomfortable in the house.

If he doesnt do housework then hes probably doing you a favour. he could be terrible at housework, so as you mother would tell you, if you want something done right you got to do it yourself.

He should be allowed to watch tv. I mean someone is paying for sky digital, it may not be him, but feck it, its paid for so he should watch what he wants.

Car in the driveway, hes right. You are as much to blame if he gets done by the gardai for not covering for him.

he is very considerate with his washing, i wish more people could be like that. He removes his clothes from the washing machine, freeing it up, and puts his clothes somewhere unoccupied instead of throwing it over something in use, such as the toaster or kettle.

So in summary, dont talk to him direct about it. And certainly dont tell him he should move out. Imagine he did move out and you get someone new in who doesnt empty the washine machine after him/her?? It could be hell on earth!!

Plek Trum

Is is that hard?

Try this: " Listen, we've had enough of living with you and its really not working out.. at all. We've given it a go but nothing has improved.
This is your one month notice, have your stuff gone by
1st December and you can leave the key behind you. Sorry it didn't work out mate".

Full stop. The End.

scientific1982

Move all his stuff to the living room and move all the stuff in the living room to his room. It wont solve anything but its funny as ****.

Agent Smith

I'd call Joe duffy if i were you OP

FatherLen

roll him up in a carpet and throw him off a bridge!!!!

TentCrasher

You cant seriously contact Joe Duffy in regards to this petty problem.
Get real

Sykk

Blast him with piss

Snakeblood

mikerowsopht wrote: »

that would be impossible

This I would believe.

CdeC

One of the housemates should start buying him romantic gifts and sending love notes.
But then say nothing to his face. he'll get weirded out and move out

Snakeblood

CdeC wrote: »

One of the housemates should start buying him romantic gifts and sending love notes.
But then say nothing to his face. he'll get weirded out and move out

If all the other housemates just start riding each other in the living room, I think he might move out. hand jobs, fisting. The lot.

FatherLen

Snakeblood wrote: »

If all the other housemates just start riding each other in the living room, I think he might move out. hand jobs, fisting. The lot.

nice

Bonito

phasers wrote: »

Tell him to fcuk off?

Princess Peach wrote: »

Deja-vu

Princess Peach wrote: »

Try having an adult conversation about the issues.

Cuddlesworth wrote: »

Kill him. Solves all your problems.

senordingdong wrote: »

Pics or GTFO

Ruu wrote: »

Put his bed and belongings in the middle of the road.

MIRMIR82 wrote: »

Tell the other 2 lads its time to grow a pair and fcuk him out. Simples:pac:

thebigbiffo wrote: »

step 1: grow up

step 2: act like a man

step 3: tell him you want him out.

seriously, you think you're the first guy in the world with an asshole housemate. just grow a set...

edit: obviously i'm talking to your 'friends' in the first person

jester77 wrote: »

Keep paying his bills and tidying up for him and it will be grand!

youcancallme>al wrote: »

Just get the snip and don't tell them about it

scientific1982 wrote: »

Move all his stuff to the living room and move all the stuff in the living room to his room. It wont solve anything but its funny as ****.

Agent Smith wrote: »

I'd call Joe duffy if i were you OP

FatherLen wrote: »

roll him up in a carpet and throw him off a bridge!!!!

Sykk wrote: »

Blast him with piss

Do all of the above, in no particular order. Sure make a lucky dip of what you'll start with.

I'm an opportunist, me.

MajorMax

TentCrasher wrote: »

You cant seriously contact Joe Duffy in regards to this petty problem.
Get real

Sarcasm Fail!

flyton5

TentCrasher wrote: »

You cant seriously contact Joe Duffy in regards to this petty problem.
Get real

Understanding After Hours Fail...

Snakeblood

FatherLen wrote: »

nice

If it's any consolation my parents view me as a terrible disappointment.

the_syco

mikerowsopht wrote: »

My Best Mate rents his granny's house

This means he's the landlord, and I doubt he gave any of the others a contract. If he has, he can kick the sponger out for not paying his bills. If not, he can give him 5 hours notice to get the f**k out of the house.

FatherLen

Snakeblood wrote: »

If it's any consolation my parents view me as a terrible disappointment.

It is.

phasers

Bonito wrote: »

Do all of the above, in no particular order. Sure make a lucky dip of what you'll start with.

I'm an opportunist, me.

Don't start with the carpet one, it would make it very hard to have that adult conversation.

Bonito

phasers wrote: »

Don't start with the carpet one, it would make it very hard to have that adult conversation.

I think carpet licking while being blasted with piss and fúcked off the edge of a cliff is definitely the right time to be having adult conversations and heart-to-hearts.

FatherLen

back to serious advice......

....eh

joe duffy!! definately!!!

sensibleken

Sleep with his ma

ScumLord

Just give an ultimatum either he moves out or you do.

sdanseo

Ring revenue and the department of Transport and report him for driving with no NCT and no tax. He'll pay a few hundred in fines then

This guy sounds like the sort of waster that really should be wiped from the earth.

DO NOT CALL JOE DUFFY, he should also be wiped from the planet and takes priority over your mates housemate in that respect!!

MistyCheese

Buy a pair of earplugs.