Uncontrollable Laughing

kfallon

Nothing worse than it in work ffs! Mate sent me a classic of a text and I've basically been biting my tongue ever since, it's not one that can be repeated either.

It's given me a fit of the 'giggles' was sweating like a whore in a church trying to keep it in!

Any idea how to cure it???

thebigbiffo

text or GTFO

Kiera

Think of your Mam and Dad having sex.

thebigbiffo

Kiera wrote: »

Think of your Mam and Dad having sex.

he wants a cure for the giggles not a trigger for psycosis

kfallon

Kiera wrote: »

Think of your Mam and Dad having sex.

:eek:
Ok now a thread about uncontrollable crying..........

strobe

I'm afraid there is no cure my horse riding friend. In fact trying to cure it only makes it worse. You have now entered 'THE GIGGLE LOOP!!!!!'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDdYM1nMmuc

Get this guy here to cook you lunch. You will be amazed how powerful an incentive suffering from THAT is for holding laughter in.

fakearms123

Avoid spicy food and leave toilet roll in the fridge.... oh wait sorry that's advice for if you had diarrhea

kfallon

Deleted User wrote: »

Get this guy here to cook you lunch. You will be amazed how powerful an incentive suffering from THAT is for holding laughter in.

Yeah but if I am sitting around after the dinner and start laughing I may end up with a little 'tea stain' on me kaks!!!

Hasmunch

was sweating like a whore in a church trying to keep it in!

Why would a whore be sweating in a church?

GavRedKing

kfallon wrote: »

Nothing worse than it in work ffs! Mate sent me a classic of a text and I've basically been biting my tongue ever since, it's not one that can be repeated either.

It's given me a fit of the 'giggles' was sweating like a whore in a church trying to keep it in!

Any idea how to cure it???

Staple your nuts to the desk, you want be laughing or having kids in a hurry.

Although others may laugh at you.

kfallon

kfallon wrote: »

Yeah but if I am sitting around after the dinner and start laughing I may end up with a little 'tea stain' on me kaks!!!

Alternatively just let it all out (the laughter not the other thing) in one big crazy burst, and then just Stop and continue working as if nothing happened.

Not only will your problem be solved, but you find people in work do not mess with you as often as they did, and there is always a suddenly clear path to the coffee machine every time you head that way.

Hasmunch

Hasmunch wrote: »

Why would a whore be sweating in a church?

They tend to dress up for church, which is a lot more than they are normally used to wearing at work.

kfallon

Deleted User wrote: »

Not only will your problem be solved, but you find people in work do not mess with you as often as they did, and there is always a suddenly clear path to the coffee machine every time you head that way.

Don't worry, people know not 'annoy' me in here, I've perfected the non-approachable look after many years!

And I don't drink coffee!

chakotha

Think about calculus.

Da Bounca

What's the joke ffs

bigneacy

thebigbiffo wrote: »

text or GTFO

Da Bounca wrote: »

What's the joke ffs

+1

Princess Peach

I'm a little bit sad today. Share the laugher

Sykk

Princess Peach wrote: »

I'm a little bit sad today. Share the laugher

Don't worry, Bowser is all out of viagra and mario is on the way.. You won't have to endure much longer.

Princess Peach

Sykk wrote: »

Don't worry, Bowser is all out of viagra and mario is on the way.. You won't have to endure much longer.

You think sad and horny are the same thing. You must be great in relationships.

kfallon

It was actually horse racing related but it's in pretty bad taste!

Sykk

Princess Peach wrote: »

You think sad and horny are the same thing. You must be great in relationships.

Username: Princess Peach... You don't get the joke. You must have a fantastic personality.

curlzy

kfallon wrote: »

It was actually horse racing related but it's in pretty bad taste!

Just tell us, go on go on go on go on go on go on go on etc etc

Maniacle

Do iiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttt
Tell us

Princess Peach

Sykk wrote: »

Username: Princess Peach... You don't get the joke. You must have a fantastic personality.

This made me even sadder. Thank you.

Mc Love

Nothing worse when its in church! Went to christmas mass once with my mate and his family and I swear my face was blue keeping the laughter in!

Sykk

kfallon wrote: »

It was actually horse racing related but it's in pretty bad taste!

You're not actually Kieren Fallon are you?... :eek:

kfallon

Sykk wrote: »

You're not actually Kieran Fallon are you?... :eek:

Kieren......and no!

Princess Peach

I don't want to hear it anymore. You've built it up to much and I think we'll just all be disappointed.

Sykk

kfallon wrote: »

Kieren......and no!

/sadface!

C'mon, spill the beans anyway!

ibarelycare

Yeah I bet the joke is shite and you'll just look stupid if you tell us.

/reverse psychology

Sykk

Ok, Kfallon.. If you don't entertain, I will!

Where do you take a sick horse?

To the Horspital!

/Skips away

Zynks

Come on Kieren, it can't be as bad as the one above!

kfallon

Sykk wrote: »

Ok, Kfallon.. If you don't entertain, I will!

Where do you take a sick horse?

To the Horspital!

/Skips away

Did you get the same text????

ibarelycare

What's a horse's favourite TV show?

Neeeeeighbours

kfallon

Riding the favourite at Cheltenham, the jockey is well ahead of the field. Suddenly he’s hit on the head by a turkey and a string of sausages. He manages to keep control of his mount and pulls back into the lead, only to be struck by a box of Christmas crackers and a dozen mince pies as he goes over the last fence. With great skill he manages to steer the horse to the front of the field once more when, on the run in, he’s struck on the head by a bottle of sherry and a Christmas pudding. thus distracted, he succeeds in coming only second. He immediately goes to the stewards to complain that he has been seriously hampered.

Btw that wasn't it

Princess Peach

kfallon wrote: »

Riding the favourite at Cheltenham, the jockey is well ahead of the field. Suddenly he’s hit on the head by a turkey and a string of sausages. He manages to keep control of his mount and pulls back into the lead, only to be struck by a box of Christmas crackers and a dozen mince pies as he goes over the last fence. With great skill he manages to steer the horse to the front of the field once more when, on the run in, he’s struck on the head by a bottle of sherry and a Christmas pudding. thus distracted, he succeeds in coming only second. He immediately goes to the stewards to complain that he has been seriously hampered.

Btw that wasn't it

You are such a tease!

*touches his arm, giggles and bats eyelids*

kfallon

A jockey went into the paddock and the trainer said to him 'You need to win this race because my wife has had a pony on and i have had a monkey on the horse'. The jockey replied 'how am going to fit on then?'

kfallon

Kieren Fallon is in the parade ring discussing race tactics with the horses trainer. The trainer tells Lester that this is the worst horse he has in training, it has had 23 races and finished last in all of them, if it doesn't win today the milkman will be using it for deliveries in the morning. Kieren mounts up and takes the horse down to the start.
The race begins and Kieren is 30 lengths last after half a furlong, he gives the horse an almighty backhander on the behind, nothing, he then gives him a series of sharp slaps down the shoulder, nothing, he then gives him two wallops right on the bollocks, the horse comes to a sudden stop, turns round to Kieren and says "for christ sake will you turn it in with that whip I have to be up at half four in the morning to deliver the milk"!

Standard Toaster

Try thinking about Michael Buble's bollix. :pac:

kfallon

Standard Toaster wrote: »

Try thinking about Michael Buble's bollix. :pac:

The giggling/laughing has passed already but thanks for that mental image :eek:

argosy2006

kfallon wrote: »

Riding the favourite at Cheltenham, the jockey is well ahead of the field. Suddenly he’s hit on the head by a turkey and a string of sausages. He manages to keep control of his mount and pulls back into the lead, only to be struck by a box of Christmas crackers and a dozen mince pies as he goes over the last fence. With great skill he manages to steer the horse to the front of the field once more when, on the run in, he’s struck on the head by a bottle of sherry and a Christmas pudding. thus distracted, he succeeds in coming only second. He immediately goes to the stewards to complain that he has been seriously hampered.

Btw that wasn't it

i saw that race it was the
The Christmas Parties at Dundalk Handicap
1m 2f 150yds , Race Value: €8,500

Asphyxia

I remember it happening a lot in school, you laugh at something silly and then wouldn't be able to stop and in the end you're laughing because you're laughing. I got giving out to more times over it

kfallon

Pocketfizz wrote: »

I remember it happening a lot in school, you laugh at something silly and then wouldn't be able to stop and in the end you're laughing because you're laughing. I got giving out to more times over it

Yeah, thing thing that triggers it off might not be hilarious but for some reason you can't stop no matter how much you try!
It once happened to me in work a few years ago, had to take an early lunch.....at 11am :eek:

Louisayankee2

Yes,I must admit, it has overcome me a few times, to the point where I had to actually dwell on it a few days later! I thought ,"Why could I not control my laughter, especially at such a somber or serious affair?"

Well, to be honest, I have to remember back to ALL the times I had done it.....thank goodness not too many...

I do believe it happened because I had been too serious too many days before the occasion at which I needed to be serious. I think our bodies are designed not to be able to take anything serious too long..... so this is like a release of steam from the pressure cooker!

I have to remember to be diligent to try some good old fashioned laughter , right before a serious occasion again.
The reason? I last did it right before my wedding vows were taken!!

I got laughing and giggling so hard , and the man about to marry us said in a very serious way, " If you continue on in this way,.....I'm afraid I will not allow you two to get married."

I got very serious right away, however, FEAR replaced the emotion of silliness..........
Please don't ask how long we stayed married....

Irish Guitarist

I used to work in an electrical/DIY shop. One day a fridge freezer fell off a stand and broke. Everyone was standing around in awe but for some reason I just went into fits of laughter. All I could do was go to the other end of the shop and laugh before the manager saw me. He still managed to see me laughing though. I have no idea why I found it so funny.

James T Kirk

If you're a man - catch ballbag in zip.

Woman - give birth.

Kiera

I got this a few weeks ago with one of the girls. We still dont know what we were laughing about but it was like we'd smoked a tone of weed. We just couldnt stop for about 20 mins and then on and off for the rest of the night every time we looked at each other.

Love those proper belly laugh moments

kfallon

Btw I still have the text saved on me phone

laura.

Oh God, you just brought back the best memory with this thread... So we were all in chapel for my grandads anniversary mass. myself and my brother were sitting beside each other and my mam was sitting beside me. I cant even remember how it happened , but i looked at my brother and we both just started laughing que the STARE from my mam, made us worse, i thought i was goin to choke trying to keep my laugh in, my mam started nippin up to shut us up but made us both worse, wouldn't mind if we were 9 or 10 but i was 25 my brother 18...in end up my brother had to leave the chapel after a really loud PAHAHAHAHA at communion time haha. my day has suddenly brightened up after remembering that, thanks OP

PS..got SERIOUS bollicking from the mother, she said grandad would be so dissappointed and i felt like 10

TeddyTedson

Those times when your with your mates and you all get a fit of the giggles can be quite painful. Love it though! Laughter is most defiantly contagious. :D:D:D:D:D