[HELP] Attention all romantic brained boardsies!

WopTittyPop

I have absolutely no idea what forum to put this thread in, so like I always do, I'm putting it in the After Hours just because that's generally where most of us "hang around"!

Ok so I need those of you with the romantic brains to put all that brain power together and help me

I'm in Australia at the moment, and I'm coming home for Christmas. I have a girlfriend at home, and I want to come home to her in a romantic lovey dovey way, but I'm trying to wrap my head around different plans!

I'll be arriving in Dublin at 8pm on a Friday night. It takes roughly about an hour - an hour and a half depending on traffic to get home. I'll more than likely be getting a taxi back to her place first and then back to mine. She has two sisters I can contact in order to make sure she'll be at home when I get there. She doesn't like flowers, so no flower ideas, unless it's a really good one! :P

Any and all ideas will be much appreciated

Go! :pac:

kaizersoze

WopTittyPop wrote: »

I have absolutely no idea what forum to put this thread in, so like I always do, I'm putting it in the After Hours just because that's generally where most of us "hang around"!

Ok so I need those of you with the romantic brains to put all that brain power together and help me

I'm in Australia at the moment, and I'm coming home for Christmas. I have a girlfriend at home, and I want to come home to her in a romantic lovey dovey way, but I'm trying to wrap my head around different plans!

I'll be arriving in Dublin at 8pm on a Friday night. It takes roughly about an hour - an hour and a half depending on traffic to get home. I'll more than likely be getting a taxi back to her place first and then back to mine. She has two sisters I can contact in order to make sure she'll be at home when I get there. She doesn't like flowers, so no flower ideas, unless it's a really good one! :P

Any and all ideas will be much appreciated

Go! :pac:

Two sisters eh?!?!

barleybooley

Sorry to tell you mate, but chances are you won't get an answer here, take it to Gift & Festivity & Party Ideas

latenia

I'd make sure she's not pregnant by your best friend first before splashing out.

slavetothegrind

barleybooley wrote: »

Sorry to tell you mate, but chances are you won't get an answer here, take it to Gift & Festivity & Party Ideas

Nonsense, stay where you are OP, pighead will be along soon with sound advice!;)

WopTittyPop

Jeeze, you guys are awesome

WopTittyPop

latenia wrote: »

I'd make sure she's not pregnant by your best friend first before splashing out.

I vote you as the Romeo of this thread so far!

MarkR

Send her some lube in the post and tell her you'll be home when the nightclub shuts.

WopTittyPop

MarkR wrote: »

Send her some lube in the post and tell her you'll be home when the nightclub shuts.

latenia, you have been replaced!

Terry

Take her for a romantic meal in Highway 66, then a few drinks in the Middle Shop or the Loft (€3.50 a pint Monday to Friday), maybe a trip to Zinc followed by a snack box from Sammy's.

Then take her home, pop a viagra and ride the fúck out of her for a few hours, because that's what she will really be waiting for.

Basq

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9HloS9Ukto

bleg

Dick in a wrapped box?

battries not included

[QUOTE=WopTittyPop;68641063]


http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056067668

PanchoVilla

Make sure her new boyfriend isn't at her place when you arrive. That would be uncomfortable.

Wolfe Tone

kick her in the face

starbelgrade

Bring her home a kangaroo.

Marcus.Aurelius

Bonk the shit out of her
















Duh.

Overheal

Bust the door down, riding on the back of a kangaroo, before a shoulder-launched wallaby lunges at your loveness and maims her. Oh, and the kangaroo's pouch is full of roses.

Customs might have a problem with this, but fcuk'em, you're riding a kangaroo, who the hell do they think they are?

anniehoo

barleybooley wrote: »

Sorry to tell you mate, but chances are you won't get an answer here,

Hellooo...theres a few of us romantic sods floatin around here.Few and far between i admit.

WopTittyPop wrote: »

She doesn't like flowers, so no flower ideas, unless it's a really good one! :P

Unless shes allergic then every girl likes flowers.Seriously.

Right if it was me (dreaming away here) this is what id like.Simple but classic and id love it.

Arrange to meet your GF in your place,hotel... etc.You ring and explain the flight has been delayed by hours,(cue ranting etc) but thats shes to go into her/the bedroom because theres an apology there (lily/rose/tulip lying on the pillow).The friend/hotel will have to get involved to make that work . This has to happen very smoothly and quickly, basically because you'll be outside then.You dont want to leave it too long and get into the pissed off,taking the makeup off ,PJs on scenario lol...

So, while still chattin on the phone, the doorbell goes (go you). "Hey hun,its me!"

Cheesy vanilla flavoured cheese....but simple and id love it.

Mr Benevolent

anniehoo wrote: »

Cheesy vanilla flavoured cheese....but simple and id love it.

I'd play down any hygiene problems tbh.

alwaysadub

anniehoo wrote: »

Unless shes allergic then every girl likes flowers.Seriously.

Em..i don't.


Anyway OP, i'd suggest booking a hotel room for the night seen as how she seems to live with her family, but if you're just arriving in from your flight, you might conk out soon as your head hits the pillow and she'd only have the tv to keep her entertained.

Take her dogging maybe, that way if you pass out, someone else can take over!

anniehoo

alwaysadub wrote: »

Em..i don't.

Really?
If a guy you're mad about bought you a beautiful bunch of flowers you'd be like..."meh"?

gurramok

Get thee to Travelodge. I heard its a fairly respectable hotel for unmarried couples who need some me time!

alwaysadub

anniehoo wrote: »

Really?
If a guy you're mad about bought you a beautiful bunch of flowers you'd be like..."meh"?

Well i wouldn't throw them back at him or anything, specially if it was like a 1st date or something! But if we were going out with each other, i'd accept them the 1st time but after that i'd let it be known at some stage that i'm not mad on them so he knows he doesn't have to buy them.

They don't do anything, and they shed all over the table and then die a couple of days later!

Jaxxy

anniehoo wrote: »

Really?
If a guy you're mad about bought you a beautiful bunch of flowers you'd be like..."meh"?

I don't like flowers either. I don't own a vase and, well, they die. What's the point?

I'd rather he brought me a bottle of wine and some sexy surprises. I do like the hotel idea though. Sorting out something private just for the two of you might be a nice idea OP. I'd appreciate that much more than a tulip on the bed.

Saila

WopTittyPop wrote: »

I'm in Australia at the moment, and I'm coming home for Christmas. I had a girlfriend at home, and I want to....

Fyp.

anniehoo

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

I don't like flowers either. I don't own a vase and, well, they die. What's the point?

Jaysus.Scrap the flowers so...im on my ownio with that one strangely

Jaxxy

anniehoo wrote: »

Jaysus.Scrap the flowers so...im on my ownio with that one strangely

Ah lots of ladies love flowers, I know my mother does, but usually if a girl says she isn't pushed on them I don't see a reason to disbelieve her. Personally for me if someone wants to treat me or do something nice for me I'd rather they spend the €50 or whatever they were going to drop in the florists on booze or toward a nice meal, followed by booze, because that's my idea of a good time.

Each to their own though! And OP you know your girlfriend better than anyone else here, so really you should already have a fair idea of what she might enjoy.

MardiB

Ok op, first of all if you haven't told her the actual date home you are on a winner, if you have you know have to make up a reason why the date has been moved back a couple of weeks. You then get her sisters to get her somwhere for your arrival time. She is sad and missing you, you come in sweep her up and give her a big smooch......


..... Then get rid of said sisters or maybe not depending on what your all into;) But honestly go with the first part of the post

bronte

Terry wrote: »

Take her for a romantic meal in Highway 66, then a few drinks in the Middle Shop or the Loft (€3.50 a pint Monday to Friday), maybe a trip to Zinc followed by a snack box from Sammy's.

Then take her home, pop a viagra and ride the fúck out of her for a few hours, because that's what she will really be waiting for.

A sound plan if ever I saw one. :cool:

starbelgrade

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

Ah lots of ladies love flowers, I know my mother does, but usually if a girl says she isn't pushed on them I don't see a reason to disbelieve her.

That is complete tosh! When I met my missus, it was before Valentines Day. She told me that she didn't go for all that romantic nonsense. So I didn't get her a card, or flowers or anything.

7 years later, she still hasn't forgiven me.

Lads, if a lady says she doesn't like flowers / chocolate / romantic gestures... what it really means is that she's grand at the minute. That doesn't mean that she won't want them at some point in the future.

Chances are you'll miss the exact point when she decides that she'd like some flowers / chocolate / romantic gestures & even though you are not a mind reader, well, you should have bloody well known.

And don't go trying to make up for the missed opportunity that you didn't even know had happened, because if you do, it'll be too bloody late to make up for it with flowers / chocolate / romantic gestures.

Take it from me. I know these things only too bloody well.

minidazzler

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

I don't like flowers either. I don't own a vase and, well, they die. What's the point?

I'd rather he brought me a bottle of wine and some sexy surprises. I do like the hotel idea though. Sorting out something private just for the two of you might be a nice idea OP. I'd appreciate that much more than a tulip on the bed.

1. Buy a dozen roses
2. Throw one away
3. Replace with 1 plastic
4. Tell significant other when last pettle falls from last rose naturally your love will fail.......let them know there is one plastic one.
5. Recieve awesome sex.
6. ???????
7. What, awesome sex isn't profit enough?

starbelgrade

minidazzler wrote: »

1. Buy a dozen roses
2. Throw one away
3. Replace with 1 plastic
4. Tell significant other when last pettle falls from last rose naturally your love will fail....

I just puked all over my screen. Had to wipe some off just to see what I was typing.

00112984

starbelgrade wrote: »

That is complete tosh! When I met my missus, it was before Valentines Day. She told me that she didn't go for all that romantic nonsense. So I didn't get her a card, or flowers or anything.

7 years later, she still hasn't forgiven me.

Lads, if a lady says she doesn't like flowers / chocolate / romantic gestures... what it really means is that she's grand at the minute. That doesn't mean that she won't want them at some point in the future.

Not true! I love flowers but hate getting them or anything for Valentine's day. It's a made-up ****e hawk of a Hallmark holiday etc. etc. blah blah blah.

My ex got me flowers for Valentine's day every year we were together despite me asking him not to as it's not an occasion I think should be acknowledged let alone "celebrated". Now, that's not the reason I dumped him but it was just another little thing that grated on me- I asked him not to waste money getting me stupid half-dead flowers, he did and while I did thank him he couldn't understand why I wasn't rushing out the door to walk around town with them looking misty-eyed.

Anyway, this is turning into a rant but some women like flowers, some don't and some genuinely do not like Valentine's day and want nothing to do with it. Men, if you have a new girlfriend and want to err on the side of caution by all means get the flowers the first year but be prepared to be told thanks-but-no-thanks on future occasions.

OP, as for your romantic act. Show up with a bucket of lube, a chicken and three midgets. She'll get the surprise of her life.

If you really want to ramp it up a gear, try the Houdini

If you're an old-fashioned man but have been spoiled by the sheep in Australia, just remember that it's not technically rape if you shout "surprise!!" first.

00112984

minidazzler wrote: »

1. Buy a dozen roses
2. Throw one away
3. Replace with 1 plastic
4. Tell significant other when last pettle falls from last rose naturally your love will fail.......let them know there is one plastic one.

You're a disgrace to man human kind.

mcmoustache

Overheal wrote: »

Bust the door down, riding on the back of a kangaroo, before a shoulder-launched wallaby lunges at your loveness and maims her. Oh, and the kangaroo's pouch is full of roses.

Customs might have a problem with this, but fcuk'em, you're riding a kangaroo, who the hell do they think they are?

You're drunk too, aren't you?

Overheal

mcmoustache wrote: »

You're drunk too, aren't you?

No I'm just a strange man sober.

mcmoustache

Overheal wrote: »

No I'm just a strange man sober.

*ponders*
.
.
.
.
.
*passes out*

Gummy Panda

Get some bath stuff from lush (should be in Australia), have a bath together and enjoy soapy tit

Longboard

If you can get a santa outfit, 4 midgets, a ford fiesta with the roof cut off, 7 deer, 500m of cable and a harrier jump jet, then i might just have the plan for you.

Auldloon

Get someone to tell her flight delayed a few hrs. She will prob get pissed off at you then and let the fella she has been riding while you were away around for a another last shag.
You meanwhile are hiding in the shadows with the axe.
After he enters....the house, give them about 5 mins to get stuck in.
Kick in door, apply axe with gusto.

Swampy

Stick a finger in her ass when she least expects it. That'll suprise her.

ebixa82

Bang the **** out of her on the kitchen table, if possible try get her 2 sisters involved for a bit of a 3some...seeing as it's Xmas her mother might be feelin frisky...she'd probably be the safest one to creampie on account of her age....just dirty Sanchez the rest. Try to make sure their father is around so you have someone to be high fiving as all this is unfolding....maybe get her brother to record it all so that they can all sit down on Xmas day and watch it as they digest dinner. Much better than Titanic!!!

WopTittyPop

Right....

Terry wrote: »

Take her for a romantic meal in Highway 66, then a few drinks in the Middle Shop or the Loft (€3.50 a pint Monday to Friday), maybe a trip to Zinc followed by a snack box from Sammy's

Pfft.. You Hillers and your ideas of romance..

PanchoVilla wrote: »

Make sure her new boyfriend isn't at her place when you arrive. That would be uncomfortable.

The Devil's threesome - Supposedly always uncomfortable!

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

OP you know your girlfriend better than anyone else here, so really you should already have a fair idea of what she might enjoy.

Like I said I have a few ideas, I'm just trying to get some other ideas as well. Think of it as if I'm making the cake of ultimate ideas

starbelgrade wrote: »

Lads, if a lady says she doesn't like flowers / chocolate / romantic gestures... what it really means is that she's grand at the minute. That doesn't mean that she won't want them at some point in the future.

She likes romantic gestures etc. She just doesn't like flowers because, like people have already said, she doesn't see the point in them as they just die!

Also, you do know there's a difference between a cliché romantic gesture, and going through effort to do something thoughtful, right?
Maybe she hasn't forgiven you 7 years on because you don't realise that buying a chick chocolates and a card doesn't say anything at all to her except "here, eat these and while you're at it check out this hilarious card I picked out!"

Longboard wrote: »

4 midgets

00112984 wrote: »

three midgets.

I didn't even mention a thing about her extreme midget fetish. You guys are good!

WopTittyPop

ebixa82 wrote: »

Bang the **** out of her on the kitchen table, if possible try get her 2 sisters involved for a bit of a 3some...seeing as it's Xmas her mother might be feelin frisky...she'd probably the safest one to creampie on account of her age....just dirty Sanchez the rest. Try to make sure their father is arou d so you have someone to be high fiving as all this is happening....maybe get her brother to record it all so that they can all sit down on Xmas day and watch it as they digest dinner. Much better than TItanic!!!

Who the fcuk watches Titanic on Christmas day??

00112984

Swampy wrote: »

Stick a finger in her ass when she least expects it. That'll suprise her.

Finger in the ass is sooooo 1993.

ebixa82

00112984 wrote: »

Finger in the ass is sooooo 1993.

All about the double fist these days, I blame the recession...

Longboard

WopTittyPop wrote: »

I didn't even mention a thing about her extreme midget fetish. You guys are good!

The umpa lumpa aviatar gave it away

WopTittyPop

Longboard wrote: »

The umpa lumpa aviatar gave it away

Are you high man? That's no oompa loompa! Why, that's a Grunka Lunka!

Mr Benevolent

gurramok wrote: »

Get thee to Travelodge. I heard its a fairly respectable hotel for unmarried couples who need some me time!

Travelodge is crap. Crowne Plaza/Ritz Carlton is where it's at.

XxMCRxBabyxX

Does she know when you're meant to be back?

If not, get one of the sisters to take her out for a bit while the other sister lets you into the house, when your girlfriend and her sister come back you're just sitting there. Nothing crazy or ott but a nice surprise!

Did something like that for my boyfriend once when we hadn't seen each other for ages. He loved it!