Virgin boyfriend/Husband

shrewd

i over heard my co-workers today...,i'm not being noisy but apparently there's is this new guy in town. has a job,real gentleman, average looking but he is virgin.
how they know that he is a virgin i don't know but one of them was so sure of this, maybe she know him before. i don't know either. But
the moment she mentioned he is a virgin. They are seem to lose interest. Very strange to me considering the opposite effect of hearing such news
have on us men.

my curiosity is now is do women like a virgin man?, (I mean one that hasn't done it before)
is being a virgin equate non-experience/non-fun?
Ladies, what's your take on this

babs78

Personally, at that age I am (early 30s) and presuming that the guy was roughly in the same age bracket, I wouldn't be keen at all on sleeping with a virgin. In fact, I wouldn't. Shallow I know, but would rather a guy that knew what buttons to press.

If I was 10 years younger and so was he, I wouldn't think too much of it. It all depends on his age really. For me anyway.

Raze_them_all

Jesus as a lad I can say the thought of a virgin doesn't excite me at all tbh!

Sardonicat

shrewd wrote: »

i over heard my co-workers today...,i'm not being noisy but apparently there's is this new guy in town. has a job,real gentleman, average looking but he is virgin.
how they know that he is a virgin i don't know but one of them was so sure of this, maybe she know him before. i don't know either. But
the moment she mentioned he is a virgin. They are seem to lose interest. Very strange to me considering the opposite effect of hearing such news
have on us men.

my curiosity is now is do women like a virgin man?, (I mean one that hasn't done it before)
is being a virgin equate non-experience/non-fun?
Ladies, what's your take on this

Indeed, how do they know he is a virgin? And, more to the point, what business is it of theirs? What a nasty pack of vipers to be discussing someone's private business like that. What a horrible thing to do to a "real gentleman"? I hope he doesn't loose to any of them.

I'm in the market for a real gentleman, don't care if he's a virgin or has been out to stud in the past. If he is a gent now, that's all that matters. How he has mangaed his private life and his reasons are nobody's business but his own.

Faith

Depends on his age really. I've a crush on a guy at the moment who's a year or so younger than me. If I found out that he was a virgin, I'd be surprised, but then excited about the idea of moulding him exactly how I want him . But if he was older, like late twenties/early thirties, I would be hesitant. I'd wonder why, mainly. If it was religious reasons, I'd be put off straight away. If it was that he'd never found that someone special, I'd still be a bit put off tbh.

Dudess

I love when a guy is experienced but then again, everyone's different in terms of their sexual preferences, so one person's fantastic lover might be another's meh lover. I don't think I'd be bothered by him being a virgin at all, once he's eager to learn and he's relaxed about things and not uptight (although some nerves I'd understand).
That said, I don't understand why virginity is so "prized" - especially female virginity among men (apparently). It (or the absence of it) is only one aspect of a person - surely it's the sum of all the parts that should be the decider?

Maple

Meh, i've slept with some alleged self proclaimed stud muffins who've turned out to be nothing more than damp squibs in the boudoir.

Once a guy is sound, enthusiastic, sweet, chilled out, funny and attractive to me what do I care how many people he's been with/not been with.

And just because a guy has had multiple partners doesn't mean he's necessarily going to know what turns me on, it's different with everyone.

Dudess

+1

There's no reason why a guy who's a virgin or very inexperienced can't be fantastic in bed merely due to his virginity - sure, there's an increased likelihood of him not being very expert, but I don't think there's necessarily a correlation between your sexual experience and your "expertise". I think it's more about being in tune with and understanding what your partner enjoys. And sometimes this can be purely instinctive.

Horse_box

Are people really that shallow that they give a sh1te if a guy is a virgin or not

If I was with a girl who was a virgin, I wouldn't think of her any differently. As long as I got on with the girl and felt comfortable with her, I wouldn't even give it a second thought

People can learn how to get good at sex. It's not as easy to unlearn being a shallow ****

SeanKev

Faith wrote: »

Depends on his age really. I've a crush on a guy at the moment who's a year or so younger than me. If I found out that he was a virgin, I'd be surprised, but then excited about the idea of moulding him exactly how I want him . But if he was older, like late twenties/early thirties, I would be hesitant. I'd wonder why, mainly. If it was religious reasons, I'd be put off straight away. If it was that he'd never found that someone special, I'd still be a bit put off tbh.

You frighten me.

holystungun9

Sardonicat wrote: »

Indeed, how do they know he is a virgin?

He wears white socks, duh

Dudess

I don't think it would necessarily be shallowness that puts people off those who are virgins, but I do think it's perhaps a bit hasty.

FoxT

...is worth a ton of experience. Pretty much applies to all fields of human endeavour, I would think.

OP, you need to find some nicer coworkers!

- FoxT

darad

I think we equate virginity in an older person as slightly odd, as if theres something wrong with them that no one else would have sex with them. If hes rather attractive then we would think he has serious issues but maybe not if he is less attractive. Terribly judgemental I know but probably human nature.

Xiney

Ok so at first I might have a bit of a "hmm that's a bit odd" reaction, but I doubt it would put me off tbh.

One of my best girlfriends was her (now) husband's first sexual partner... he was in his late 20s when they got together. He'd just never found the right person before her (they'd known each other for over a decade, he was her brother's friend). He's a good looking guy, too... so it wasn't that he couldn't get any. He just wanted to wait until he was in love.



I thought it was really sweet. But I'm a sucker for romance


(She's due their first baby in a few short weeks!)

naughto

Raze_them_all wrote: »

Jesus as a lad I can say the thought of a virgin doesn't excite me at all tbh!

its prob shoveltooth

Links234

hey well I'm a virgin, for obvious reasons I've never, you know and I hope that when things are sorted out for me and I'm ready that she'll be understanding and it won't be an issue for her.

LegacyUser

Going unreg for this cos I haven't asked the OH if I can post this online!

He was a virgin when we got together, and it didn't bother me at all. In fact, I was his first proper kiss as well (he was 19). He was a bit embarrassed admitting his lack of experience, but he knew that I understood and wasn't judging him. Maybe other people in my position would have minded, or thought that it was strange, but I don't think it's anyone else's business really.

When we decided to go for it, we got into bed and kissed and things for ages so he'd get a feel for things (no pun intended!) I'd said to him that we didn't have to have sex, which I think took the pressure off a bit. We did in the end, three times that night. Of course he wasn't entirely sure what he was doing at first but he got the hang of it quickly enough! I think it was probably ideal circumstances and I kinda wish I'd lost my virginity the same way

I'd only slept with two people before him, but he's definitely the best lover I've had. He's really considerate and likes to make sure I'm getting maximum enjoyment, something I think many guys lack! He's also not afraid to experiment Just because I'm the only person he's slept with, it doesn't mean we're having boring vanilla sex!

The Lovely Muffin

Tbh, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

So long as he treated me properly etc, then whether or not he is experienced wouldn't matter.

starlit

Personally, I wouldn't sleep with a virgin unless he has had some kind of intimate experiences. I prefer men who aren't virigns and have some level of experience.

LegacyUser

I'm still a virgin at 24. Its one of those things that kinda annoys me. I've been out with a few girls in the past including going out with one girl for over a year when we were 16 but we were both quite shy and never got past oral. I now feel self conscious going up to girls because I know if we ever get that far that I'll be considered a freak for not having had sex at this age.

Would being a virgin at 24 be seen as being very old? I've recently being trying to go out more and get a girlfriend as its been a while but am self conscious that I'll be considered a freak!

Dudess

On average, it's probably a small bit late, but really not that late. 40 for instance is late. To those your age and younger, yeah it would seem quite old, but to those older than you, it's very young yet. I'm 32 and to me, a person being a virgin at 24 is not in the least bit shocking. It probably seems like everyone your age is doing it, but you can be certain not everyone is.

doesntbotherme wrote: »

He was a virgin when we got together, and it didn't bother me at all. In fact, I was his first proper kiss as well (he was 19). He was a bit embarrassed admitting his lack of experience, but he knew that I understood and wasn't judging him. Maybe other people in my position would have minded, or thought that it was strange, but I don't think it's anyone else's business really.

When we decided to go for it, we got into bed and kissed and things for ages so he'd get a feel for things (no pun intended!) I'd said to him that we didn't have to have sex, which I think took the pressure off a bit. We did in the end, three times that night. Of course he wasn't entirely sure what he was doing at first but he got the hang of it quickly enough! I think it was probably ideal circumstances and I kinda wish I'd lost my virginity the same way

I'd only slept with two people before him, but he's definitely the best lover I've had. He's really considerate and likes to make sure I'm getting maximum enjoyment, something I think many guys lack! He's also not afraid to experiment Just because I'm the only person he's slept with, it doesn't mean we're having boring vanilla sex!

In my opinion, the only surprising thing about that is that he felt embarrassed about a lack of experience at the grand old age of 19.

Had two virgin boyfriends after I was "experienced". Wasn't a problem. You just tell them what to do, and if they're enthuiastic, will be just as good as a "stud". Had an older boyfriend who thought he was going to "teach me and show me" (he was 22 and I was 19!) and it turned out I'd had a more active sex life than he ever had.

In my experience, it isn't practice that makes a lover, it's enthuiasm! I have no problem with virgin boyfriends.

amacachi

Dudess wrote: »

In my opinion, the only surprising thing about that is that he felt embarrassed about a lack of experience at the grand old age of 19.

What's surprising about it? Do you think that teenage males are unlikely to boast or exaggerate about their sexual prowess?

Dudess

No.

I find it surprising that someone would feel embarrassed about a lack of sexual experience at 19.
28 for instance I could understand, but not 19.

Novella

I wouldn't be put off at all by a guy being a virgin. I think it's pretty horrible that people are discussing the fact that the guy you mention in the opening post is a virgin... I mean, so what? Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Raze_them_all

Dudess wrote: »

No.

I find it surprising that someone would feel embarrassed about a lack of sexual experience at 19.
28 for instance I could understand, but not 19.

Different times, I've only slept with one person in the best part of a year yet nobody believes me because of what I used to be like.

Everyone always says that boys brag and lie about sexual encounters and blah blah blah but these days in my experience most of the time they are not.

amacachi

Dudess wrote: »

No.

I find it surprising that someone would feel embarrassed about a lack of sexual experience at 19.
28 for instance I could understand, but not 19.

Guessing you didn't get the main thrust of my post. Of course if he knew the actual experience most people get by that age he wouldn't have been worried, but I doubt he knew an awful lot of other fellas who didn't claim to have been riding rings round themselves since they were in their early teens.

sallymae

what a strange post to put up some people surprise me all the time

Dudess

What post are you talking about, Sallymae?

Raze_them_all wrote: »

Everyone always says that boys brag and lie about sexual encounters and blah blah blah but these days in my experience most of the time they are not.

Oh I certainly don't believe all young lads who say they've ridden all round them are lying (wishful thinking by those who say they're lying methinks ) however some definitely do - as confessed to me a number of years later by some males who would have had you believe they were Mick Jagger Mk II when they were younger... :pac:

Shivers26

A virgin would hold no appeal to me at all tbh.

I briefly dated a guy a while back and we had a couple of dates, things going ok but no major sparks. Anyway this one weekend he came over and we watched a movie and we had a couple of drinks and when bed time came the look of horror when he realised I didn't have a spare bedroom for him. I was by no means expecting sex but thought a kiss and cuddle would have been nice. I copped on pretty quick he was a virgin (he was 31) and he slept next to me fully clothed in the fetal position. Not attractive at all, i'm afraid. He was petrified of the whole situation. It went pretty much downhill from there.

I do know of a couple who married quite young and both were virgins. I did think that was sweet but the playing field was equal in this situation.