What if.....

..... this is as good as it gets?

Jack asked it in the film of the same name and it never got answered....

so answer it!

icywind1980

It can't be. There are 77 virgins waiting for me in heaven. They all have milk and honey strapped to their arses.

icywind1980

icywind1980 wrote: »

It can't be. There are 77 virgins waiting for me in heaven. They all have milk and honey strapped to their arses.

Thought it was 72? And did anyone ever mention what SEX the virgins were???? Or WHY they spent this long staying virgins against the odds of modern life?

And are you ready for 72 mothers in law?

Wolfe Tone

Then I want my money back!

icywind1980

Deleted User wrote: »

Thought it was 72? And did anyone ever mention what SEX the virgins were???? Or WHY they spent this long staying virgins against the odds of modern life?

And are you ready for 72 mothers in law?

Are the MIL virgins too? Oh wait..

alwaysadub

Well if this is as good as it gets, i'm jumping off a bridge tomorrow.

icywind1980

alwaysadub wrote: »

Well if this is as good as it gets, i'm jumping off a bridge tomorrow.

Dun forget your swimmies, mate.

alwaysadub

alwaysadub wrote: »

Well if this is as good as it gets, i'm jumping off a bridge tomorrow.

Are talking brooklyn or liffey? Its very important to clarify these things for a statement to have any effect

alwaysadub

Deleted User wrote: »

Are talking brooklyn or liffey? Its very important to clarify these things for a statement to have any effect

Well if you wanna buy me a ticket to New York, i'll choose the Brooklyn..

icywind1980

alwaysadub wrote: »

Well if you wanna buy me a ticket to New York, i'll choose the Brooklyn..

You'll get shot before you even approach the bridge.

orourkeda

icywind1980 wrote: »

It can't be. There are 77 virgins waiting for me in heaven. They all have milk and honey strapped to their arses.

Mine have bovril smeared on their tits

icywind1980

orourkeda wrote: »

Mine have bovril smeared on their tits

Mmmmm tasteh...

orourkeda

orourkeda wrote: »

Mine have bovril smeared on their tits

Never has the phrase "one mans heaven is another mans hell" rang so true.

icywind1980

Deleted User wrote: »

Never has the phrase "one mans heaven is another mans hell" rang so true.

Hey, if the man likes salty goo, let him to it xD

Rented Mule

Deleted User wrote: »

..... this is as good as it gets?

Jack asked it in the film of the same name and it never got answered....

so answer it!

It sure as hell beats the alternative.

icywind1980

Rented Mule wrote: »

It sure as hell beats the alternative.

Living in the middle east?

Rabies

icywind1980 wrote: »

It can't be. There are 77 virgins waiting for me in heaven. They all have milk and honey strapped to their arses.

do you plan on eating or fvcking them?

Asphyxia

Well if this is as good as it gets you better make the most of life. I've been feelings great these passed months everything has just fell into place and is going the way I want it so I'm not going to think about bad stuff, way to happy.

icywind1980

Rabies wrote: »

do you plan on eating or fvcking them?

A little of column "A" and a little of column 2.

lisaface

amacachi wrote: »

This isn't as good as it gets because I'm listening to a female friend on the phone to her foreign foreign boyfriend literally as I was typing this and said she wouldn't be with him in a long-distance thing. Yet this is life and it's ****ing awesome. I found out today I passed my repeats and found out it today.

Life is fantastic, you just have to open your mind and see it and realise that even though you meaning nothing in the universe you're also the only thing that matters.



Oh Christ I feel like an awful hipster after that.

Hmmm did this post come with a side order of Alcohol? :P

Oooh an OP
Things can only get better!!

It was time.

robbie_998

just watched this movie the other day for the first time on dvd and i was actually quite surprised = excellent movie indeed

but it got better for jack through out the movie... it did infact get better for him

johnmcdnl

As a college student I quite like life as it is so yeah - this is good as it is

getthegarglein

icywind1980 wrote: »

Living in the middle east?

heh heh... both humorous and interesting

amacachi

lisaface wrote: »

Hmmm did this post come with a side order of Alcohol? :P

Oooh an OP
Things can only get better!!

Damn, deleted my post then realised I'd been quoted, I shan't be looking at this thread again because I'm just starting to sober up a tiny bit and don't want to know what I was saying. :pac:

EDIT: Wow, reading over my post I have literally no idea what point I was trying to make. I shouldn't be left alone.

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

Are talking brooklyn or liffey? Its very important to clarify these things for a statement to have any effect

There's actually plans to erect a big net underneath the Brooklyn Bridge, if I remember correctly. Supposedly the suicide rate off that bridge is so high that it's the only way to prevent it.

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

There's actually plans to erect a big net underneath the Brooklyn Bridge, if I remember correctly. Supposedly the suicide rate off that bridge is so high that it's the only way to prevent it.

Be fun if they then just left them there. You could look over the bridge and see this net with arms and legs sticking out all over the place.

Dravokivich

If this is as good as it gets... I'm doing pretty dam good...

curlzy

Hmmm for me yeah, got a great job, perfect man, loadsa pets and a big holiday planned for next year (2 months of travelling around the USA) so yeah life is fecking great, but I think it's going to get even better!:D *curlzy wanders off humming "things can only get better*

kfallon

curlzy wrote: »

but I think it's going to get even better!:D *curlzy wanders off humming "things can only get better*

You reckon you're up the spout then??? :eek:

There goes the US Holiday, the pets and maybe the job :pac:
Your man might run a mile too when he realises you've been sabotaging his contraception

candy-gal1

As said by pocketfizz, if this is as good as it gets then im happy!

curlzy

kfallon wrote: »

You reckon you're up the spout then??? :eek:

There goes the US Holiday, the pets and maybe the job :pac:
Your man might run a mile too when he realises you've been sabotaging his contraception

Whoosh!!! Explain please? Also defo not preggers, I'm surfing the crimson tide to get classy about it And the pets no way!!! I'd get rid of the baby before I'd get rid of my puddytats, snake, hedgehog, turtle and guinea pigs, I've got my principles!!!!

kfallon

curlzy wrote: »

Whoosh!!! Explain please? Also defo not preggers, I'm surfing the crimson tide to get classy about it And the pets no way!!! I'd get rid of the baby before I'd get rid of my puddytats, snake, hedgehog, turtle and guinea pigs, I've got my principles!!!!

Phew! Enjoy the holiday so :pac:

kfallon

curlzy wrote: »

I'd get rid of the baby before I'd get rid of my puddytats, snake, hedgehog, turtle and guinea pigs, I've got my principles!!!!

Keep an eye on that snake otherwise he might get rid of all the rest of your pets for you!!!

NothingMan

For christ sake Tax, 2 women on the go and they get it on with you at the same time. A beautiful new daughter and you're wondering if it's as good as it gets? Maybe you should do the lottery, you'd probably win.

curlzy

kfallon wrote: »

Keep an eye on that snake otherwise he might get rid of all the rest of your pets for you!!!

LOLs, yeah we make sure they're never out together, although, she's only a cutsie-wutsie little corn snake so she'd only really be a threat to the guineas, the hedgehog wouldn't make a good meal at all :eek:

curlzy

NothingMan wrote: »

For christ sake Tax, 2 women on the go and they get it on with you at the same time. A beautiful new daughter and you're wondering if it's as good as it gets? Maybe you should do the lottery, you'd probably win.

I second this!!!! Come on now, you've 3 fab females in your life and you want to know if it gets better??? :eek: You should totally work on being content with your lot (and yours is alot:D) in life!!!!

phill106

icywind1980 wrote: »

It can't be. There are 77 virgins waiting for me in heaven. They all have milk and honey strapped to their arses.

Hopefully they are all men...

flyton5

phill106 wrote: »

Hopefully they are all men...

Or nuns....

curlzy

curlzy wrote: »

I second this!!!! Come on now, you've 3 fab females in your life and you want to know if it gets better??? :eek: You should totally work on being content with your lot (and yours is alot:D) in life!!!!

NothingMan wrote: »

For christ sake Tax, 2 women on the go and they get it on with you at the same time. A beautiful new daughter and you're wondering if it's as good as it gets? Maybe you should do the lottery, you'd probably win.

Sorry! I felt it was time I tried to start a thread and... well to pardon the pun... this was as good as it got

NothingMan

Deleted User wrote: »

Sorry! I felt it was time I tried to start a thread and... well to pardon the pun... this was as good as it got

If I were you I'd have just started a thread saying "I get to make sweet love with 2 women whenever I want" and just left it at that.

The general rule is if you start a thread you kick it off with your own opinion. So to say, for example, "What if this is it? For me, I'm happy with my lot etc... How do you all feel about your lot in life."

Kicks off the discussion a bit better and stops people from thinking you're just whinging.

NothingMan

NothingMan wrote: »

If I were you I'd have just started a thread saying "I get to make sweet love with 2 women whenever I want" and just left it at that.

Ive been reading AH long enough to know that a thread started with that title would.... not be pretty

Im half tempted to try it just to see the carnage that would ensue.

curlzy

Deleted User wrote: »

Ive been reading AH long enough to know that a thread started with that title would.... not be pretty

Im half tempted to try it just to see the carnage that would ensue.

LOL,:D do it!!!! Oh the vitriolic rage that would spew in your direction would be hilarious I'd say!!! Just stand well back from your computer!!!

Although saying that it could just turn into a very interesting thread, or you could just get continual pats on the back, hmmmm, probably a mixture of all three.

DO IT, DO IT, DO IT.

curlzy

curlzy wrote: »

LOL,:D do it!!!! Oh the vitriolic rage that would spew in your direction would be hilarious I'd say!!! Just stand well back from your computer!!!

Although saying that it could just turn into a very interesting thread, or you could just get continual pats on the back, hmmmm, probably a mixture of all three.

DO IT, DO IT, DO IT.

Again I am tempted, but I would only post something honest in the content after posting that subject line. I couldnt just post the subject and run

curlzy

curlzy wrote: »

LOL,:D do it!!!!

I did it just for you

NothingMan

Deleted User wrote: »

I did it just for you

Good to see peer pressure is alive and well. That thread didn't last too long at all. I quite enjoyed the Crystal Swing jibe though.

I am too naive to get the reference, and the first google link I found was something to do with country music so I ran. Care to explain, or is it better I remain an ignoramous on this one?

NothingMan

Deleted User wrote: »

I am too naive to get the reference, and the first google link I found was something to do with country music so I ran. Care to explain, or is it better I remain an ignoramous on this one?

Crystal Swing are a family group of Mother, bro and sister who do very over the top show tune type stuff. Made famous through a youtube and live appearance on Ellen. Many incestuous jibes are made on account of them looking like the mother had a few sprouts with at least her first cousin and the bro and sis making googly eyes at each other when they perform.

Ah.... euw..... erm.....

No

Actually I have never had a thread locked before. I feel sort of... soiled somehow now..... like I need to take a few showers. I guess it passes?

TouchingVirus

No. You slip biko some thanks in a brown envelope and the thread magically re-opens