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How not to do it.

Oryx · 2010-07-01 10:29:00

Apologies if this has been mentioned before, but I think this is brilliant. http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ A competition to find the worst opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels. A homage to Edward Bulwer-Lytton, who has the dubious honour of having written the often copied but never equalled:

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#32 08-07-2010 06:33PM

dr.bollocko

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"The pain wouldn't stop, and Vern still had three cats left"

Inspired.

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#33 08-07-2010 10:50PM

angelll

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ToasterSparks wrote: »

How about this?

That's brilliant!

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#34 09-07-2010 05:43PM

Oryx

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I had a go at this today, and have now written 1100 words of complete dirge. Its amazing how easy it is. My only concerns are that its not bad enough, unless I edit out certain details I may have to mark it nsfw, and that after this I may never be able to write properly again.

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#35 09-07-2010 10:48PM

dawvee

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I don't really have any ideas for a story, but I'd love to see one with a male romantic lead named Mike Hunt.

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#36 12-07-2010 01:34AM

Antilles

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Has there been any movement on setting a date and wordcount for this?

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#37 12-07-2010 08:33AM

pickarooney

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I think I'll kick it off today with a 1500 max count and running until 31st July if that suits.

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#38 12-07-2010 01:48PM

[Deleted User]
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So is the purpose to write the worst story possible?

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#39 12-07-2010 02:37PM

ToasterSparks

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The countdown had stalled at T minus 69 seconds when Desiree, the first female ape to go up in space, winked at me slyly and pouted her thick, rubbery lips unmistakably--the first of many such advances during what would prove to be the longest, and most memorable, space voyage of my career.

--Martha Simpson, Glastonbury, Connecticut (1985 Winner)

You know, I'd quite like to read more of this story!

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#40 12-07-2010 02:43PM

pickarooney

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The thread for VOAT 5 is up now here.

Feel free to sig it

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#41 12-07-2010 02:57PM

Aoibheann

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ToasterSparks wrote: »

How about this?

Mind if I rob that for my sig?

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#42 12-07-2010 05:19PM

ToasterSparks

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Of course not, I made it so everyone can use it. Rob away!

Thanks for helping with the comp, too!

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