Things you said you shouldn't have

Lando Griffin

When working in this place once I had to photocopy a page from a manual to give to a customer. Using the photocopier was a new girl in the office and not used to her job. She was coping a pages from some sort of draft thing, and came across a blank page. She looked at it puzzled and asked should she include this?
I replied "You better, but I doubt there is any white ink in the copier" and walked off smugly.
Later that day I was called into the Managers office, a fierce man with a reputation and got an all mighty boll**ing and given an official warning as the girl had asked someone where she could get the white ink for the copier.
Actually, the next Xmas party I hooked up with this girl and we are now 7 years together, so I suppose every cloud has a silver lining.
Have you ever put your foot in it or have any good stories about work.

PK2008

Lando Griffin wrote: »

Actually, the next Xmas party I hooked up with this girl

Did you offer to show her where your white ink was?

seamus

Is your girlfriend going to be happy that you've publically declared that she's "not the brightest tool in the box"?

Oh, and I accused a girl in work of being slutty. I was trying to make a jokey friends reference, but I was drunk and she wasn't, so it came out all wrong...

Mr Benevolent

seamus wrote: »

Is your girlfriend going to be happy that you've publically declared that she's "not the brightest tool in the box"?

Oh, and I accused a girl in work of being slutty. I was trying to make a jokey friends reference, but I was drunk and she wasn't, so it came out all wrong...

If it's true then she won't notice.

phill106

Lando Griffin wrote: »

When working in this place once I had to photocopy a page from a manual to give to a customer. Using the photocopier was a new girl in the office and not the brightest tool in the box. She was coping a pages from some sort of draft thing, and came across a blank page. She looked at it puzzled and asked should she include this?
I replied "You better, but I doubt there is any white ink in the copier" and walked off smugly.
Later that day I was called into the Managers office, a fierce man with a reputation and got an all mighty boll**ing and given an official warning as the girl had asked someone where she could get the white ink for the copier.
Actually, the next Xmas party I hooked up with this girl and we are now 7 years together, so I suppose every cloud has a silver lining.
Have you ever put your foot in it or have any good stories about work.

Hehe like your girls dim do you? :P
Or shall i say easily fooled?

rebelpebble

Lando Griffin wrote: »

Using the photocopier was a new girl in the office and not the brightest tool in the box.

Does she know you think she's stupid?

Paulyh

Lando Griffin wrote: »

When working in this place once I had to photocopy a page from a manual to give to a customer. Using the photocopier was a new girl in the office and not the brightest tool in the box. She was coping a pages from some sort of draft thing, and came across a blank page. She looked at it puzzled and asked should she include this?
I replied "You better, but I doubt there is any white ink in the copier" and walked off smugly.
Later that day I was called into the Managers office, a fierce man with a reputation and got an all mighty boll**ing and given an official warning as the girl had asked someone where she could get the white ink for the copier.
Actually, the next Xmas party I hooked up with this girl and we are now 7 years together, so I suppose every cloud has a silver lining.
Have you ever put your foot in it or have any good stories about work.

Looks like you've done it agin OP

Menengroth™

Chips. Knew I should've said Daddy. fml

Lando Griffin

Paulyh wrote: »

Looks like you've done it agin OP

Edited it now, I wasn't thinking and actually she turned out intelligant in the end.

vonnie10

Really put my foot in it one time when i thought these two lads were really good friends when in reality they couldn't stand each other. Anyway we were out one night and i was chatting away to one of the lads and he started slagging the other chap off but in a really funny way he was hilarious about it slagging his clothes and his accent. I just thought it was a bit of banter cos i know in my group of friends we constantly slag each other off in that way. Anyway later on that night i got chatting to the other lad and started telling how Lad no 1 does this hilarious impression of him and the like thinking that as they're mates he would find it equally hilarious... Unfortunately this was not the case and as soon as i opened my mouth he got really defensive and started asking what else this guy has been saying behind his back. The guy then marches up to the other chap and starts arguing with him about how he has been slagging him off behind his back and why doesn't he just come up to his face and say it !! I totally nearly caused them to start fighting and i later learned that one of the lads had started seeing the others ex-girlfriend and things weren't rosy at all. Definitely wished i'd kept my mouth shut there

Hasmunch

Ill just stick the tip in

longshanks

brightest tool in the box?? sharpest son, sharpest. c'mon, its not rocket surgery.....

Darksaga87

seamus wrote: »

Is your girlfriend going to be happy that you've publically declared that she's "not the brightest tool in the box"?

Oh, and I accused a girl in work of being slutty. I was trying to make a jokey friends reference, but I was drunk and she wasn't, so it came out all wrong...

What does a bright tool have over a dull tool?

I guess hes not the sharpest bulb in the box.

Kimono-Girl

whenever i open my mouth i say things i shouldn't have ...so much said so little after hours..

i suppose calling x-factor viewers braindead morons has offended the most people in my life...:o

NothingMan

Not only using a socially and comically reprehensible phrase but in the worst possible way.

Saying a "Yore ma" comment to a VERY close friend who's Mothers funeral I was at only months before. Luckily he saw it as the fuck up it was and didn't hold it against me.

Menengroth™

candlelover wrote: »

i suppose calling x-factor viewers braindead morons has offended the most people in my life...

Nothing wrong with speaking the truth though.

funk-you

Told my mate to stop being a bufty and come for a pint. Only remembered a few second later that he'd 'come out' to me earlier that day.

-Funk

Paulyh

Lando Griffin wrote: »

Edited it now, I wasn't thinking and actually she turned out intelligant in the end.

ah no, it was funnier the first way

Andrew33

Worst thing I ever said?

"I DO":D

Archeron

Once ordering lunch in a deli I asked the very attractive Spanish girl serving whether or not she had brown baps. Everyone else in the queue laughed, but she didnt get it.

Banned Account

Slightly arse ways here but I was working in a pub in corak years back, two rather tasty looking Spanish girls came in, spent a few minutes looking at the spirit shelves, called me over and said

"Hello, erm, we have two black bushes .."


Needless to say, I laughed quite loudly

alwaysadub

i'm forever putting my foot in it with people. I can't remember any of the big fcuk ups i've made for some reason-i think i've buried them deep down!

jcrowbar

I used to work as a life guard part time when in college.

Anyway one morning I had to ask a pregnant woman to stop diving into the swimming pool as it wouldn't have been the safest thing to do in her condition.

She wasn't pregnant!

Banned Account

jcrowbar wrote: »

I used to work as a life guard part time when in college.

Anyway one morning I had to ask a pregnant woman to stop diving into the swimming pool as it wouldn't have been the safest thing to do in her condition.

She wasn't pregnant!

So who did you ask instead? Was this like a daily target you had set for you? How did you get out of this dilly of a pickle?

yoshytoshy

If you decide to send out wedding invitations ,send them out on black paper with white ink:D

ocokev

It seems women are the cause of severial boll**ings for you?

Lando Griffin wrote: »

I was driving in our village Saturday and I spotted this honey walking in shorts and a lovely blouse, long flowing brown hair and a great tan.
I slowed down to have a gawk at the front at which time she turned, saw me and yelled
“wha the fu** ar ya lookin at you fu**en boll**”
Classy girl?

jcrowbar

Fitzcaraldo wrote: »

So who did you ask instead? Was this like a daily target you had set for you? How did you get out of this dilly of a pickle?

There was only one woman! All I can guess is that she had an odd shaped beer belly

Needless to say I didn't hang around.

happyfriday

I have a terrible habit of asking people at funerals who are closly related to the deceased how they are in like a greeting kind of way. As soon as it comes out of my mouth I want to grab it back. I'm sure some day someone will scream 'how the **** do you think I am' back at me. I might then learn not to be such an idiot if they do. I'm always saying really stupid things at funerals though, I try to keep my mouth shut but it's not always possible.

Darksaga87

Im forever making inappropriate jokes around people who not really "friends" But we would have a laugh, and im the one who always says something that just kills the mood for them.

My proper friends on the other hand would know that im joking and laugh about it. But when im not being monitored..... im lucky im not in jail.

Le King

Told the missuses father to fu*k off about two years ago after we had an argument over a birthday present.

He's still a wa*ker but I shouldn't of said that.


Still doesn't sit down very well

Darksaga87

"Dad?"

Lentil

Was working in a restauraunt one night. Quite low lighting to add to the general ambience (and to camoflage the dinge). Walked up to a table of 2 people, and said "Right gents, what can I get for you". It was in fact a guy and his girlfriend, who had short hair.

Hid out the back until they left. For shame.

easyeason3

Started a new job & one of the female supervisors looked pregnant so I asked her when she was due.

I don't trust my eyes anymore

She hates me but to be honest I doubt we would have had much in common anyway...she's a ginger person & looks like she ate a small island.

Nervous Wreck

A few years ago, two friends of mine - a couple - were going through bad times and were nearing a break-up. We could all see it coming, even them, but they were desperately clinging on. So they were sitting in a couple of chairs one day with a chair between them. They were turned in towards each other and chatting. A friend with a penchant for cringe humour completely forgot their relationship difficulties and sat smack down in between them on the middle chair and demanded-attempting comedy- "Oh, I'm sorry, am I getting in the way of your FAILING RELATIONSHIP!?!?!?"

Took him 15 minutes to realise what he'd done.... How we laughed.

Scarydoll

easyeason3 wrote: »

Started a new job & one of the female supervisors looked pregnant so I asked her when she was due.

I don't trust my eyes anymore

She hates me but to be honest I doubt we would have had much in common anyway...she's a ginger person & looks like she ate a small island.

You don't like ginger people?

easyeason3

scareydoll wrote: »

You don't like ginger people?

Does anyone???:D

Scarydoll

easyeason3 wrote: »

Does anyone???:D

:eek:

sbsquarepants

Osu wrote: »

Told the missuses father to fu*k off about two years ago after we had an argument over a birthday present.

He's still a wa*ker but I shouldn't of said that.


Still doesn't sit down very well

Did you kick him in arse too?:eek:

easyeason3

scareydoll wrote: »

:eek:

Another thing I shouldn't have said.

minidazzler

Darksaga87 wrote: »

Im forever making inappropriate jokes around people who not really "friends" But we would have a laugh, and im the one who always says something that just kills the mood for them.

My proper friends on the other hand would know that im joking and laugh about it. But when im not being monitored..... im lucky im not in jail.

I'm that guy in my group, even my friend find it cringey, but by now I just don't care and just hate myself after I leave their presence! ha

Was mocking a friends mam, had done it previously, this night he decided to tell me that his mother had been dead for 7 years! Cringe!!

A friend of mine was chatting up an American girl who had a bit of girth about her, perfect for him really, and she was telling him she is an Au Pair for an autistic boy, my friend says to her "So you are basically a labrador?" in a jokey way...she didn't get the joke!

stovelid

Got into an argument with a women who had taken a disabled space and she started screaming at me to mind my own business and that she wasn't going to spend all day looking for a normal space.

I said something along the lines of my apologies, you actually do appear handicapped so work away.

Not my most PC moment.

easyeason3

stovelid wrote: »

Got into an argument with a women who had taken a wheelchair space and she started screaming at me to mind my own business and that she wasn't going to spend all day looking for a normal space.

I said something along the lines of my apologies, you actually do appear handicapped so work away.

Not my most PC moment.

Report the bItch in future.
My blood boils when I see that **** happening.

Nice bitchy comment though!

PK2008

stovelid wrote: »

Got into an argument with a women who had taken a disabled space and she started screaming at me to mind my own business and that she wasn't going to spend all day looking for a normal space.

I said something along the lines of my apologies, you actually do appear handicapped so work away.

Not my most PC moment.

Ha! Rookie mistake on her part

If you park in the handicapped zone you should at least drag your leg when you walk to the shop

NothingMan

PK2008 wrote: »

Ha! Rookie mistake on her part

If you park in the hanicapped zone you should at least drag your leg when you walk to the shop

Or do a Larry David and put on a stammer.

Raiser

Archeron wrote: »

Once ordering lunch in a deli I asked the very attractive Spanish girl serving whether or not she had brown baps. Everyone else in the queue laughed, but she didnt get it.

Archeron wrote: »

Was in a deli with a coworker a wee while ago, and queuing at the counter, noticed this really gorgeous Spanish looking girl serving. Yer man in front was next, and she smiled at him and asked if wanted a sambo or a roll, and his reply to her was "Do you have brown baps?" Neither of them noticed the slip of the tongue, but 3 or 4 people behind broke out laughing.

You ever say innocently throw a funny double entendre out in your daily conversation?

Remembered this from November 2007 (For some odd, odd reason)

- The thing you 'shouldn't have said' was that it was you that had said it :P

saywhatyousee

candlelover wrote: »

whenever i open my mouth i say things i shouldn't have ...so much said so little after hours..

i suppose calling x-factor viewers braindead morons has offended the most people in my life...:o

i fell into that hole too. got a horsewhipping for giving out about it one evening by the mother sister girlfriend all in the room at the time

El_Dangeroso

Raiser wrote: »

Remembered this from November 2007 (For some odd, odd reason)

- The thing you 'shouldn't have said' was that it was you that had said it :P

That is a ridiculously good memory you have there, who remembers a thread from 2007? I sometimes go to thank old posts only to realise I was the one who wrote them.

sbsquarepants

Raiser wrote: »

Remembered this from November 2007 (For some odd, odd reason)

- The thing you 'shouldn't have said' was that it was you that had said it :P

Your honour, the prosecution rests!!

Nicely done sir!:D

witnessmenow

I was talking to guys in the class below me in college in a lab about how hard a subject was. I was saying that I had put loads of time into it and got C and one my friends says "Dont lie, you didnt nothing for that subject" to which i replied without even thinking "Shut the fck up, i worked like a black for that subject", no noticing the two guys in the class below me originally from Nigeria were behind me. Felt really bad about it

Must be an Athlone thing, Marry O'Rourke said something similar about her campaign workers after her last election, we all must be racist in the midlands

Queen-Mise

Friends of mine from college were sharing a room for the first time. She was 22 and he was 18. On hearing this I said - so do you get the double bed and a cot in the corner for the boyfriend. Thank fcuk they took it in good humour - it was a bit sharp.

annie87

I worked in a pub when i was 18, and once there was a couple (female) in there who flirted with me and asked me out as i was cleaing their table. I was quite disturbed because they were in their forties, not good looking, and one looked extremely manly,( and I was shallow...and straight) so I declined their offer.

Cut to abot a week later when I was out in with the people I worked with after a meal. We sat at the bar and started telling stories about work, each out doing each other with our 'hilarious' anecdotes. So, I tell everybody about my encounter with the lesbians, totally exagerating, making them out to be way uglier/hairier/butcher/fatter/ more boggerish than they were. Who do you think decided to stand behind me and order a pint at that moment?:eek:

I was wondering why everybody had gone rather quiet. It was incredibly unfortunate timing, and there's no way they couldn't have heard me as the bar was quiet. I was mortified.