Living in Oz but so homesick..

Overheal

http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/electronic/c7b4/?pfm=Carousel_Rovio_2

Bascially a Webcam and Microphone on wheels. Roam around the family stead, play with the dogs, etc

KilOit

Australians are not nice people and nice weather looses it's attraction after afew months, i have been all over the world and Ireland really is a great country.

Can't really say move back or not you really need to discuss it with your partner about jobs and uprooting kids etc etc.

Pretty_Pistol

If it was just yourself I would say come home but you need to discuss it with your husband. I lived in another country for nearly a year and I was so homesick I was miserable and regret not coming home earlier.

The economy is pretty bad here. A family member of mine works within the HSE and she's not even allowed to hire replacements for her department (not nursing).

Nuttzz

have to work, pay the bills, endure peak hour traffic, put the kids in childcare, pay the rent as house prices are insane so no hope of buying, etc etc..

Would you have to work here?

Is the traffic any better in Dublin?

Would you kids not needed to be minded here?

Are the banks lending for mortgages these days?

Are houses in Dublin priced reasonably yet?

What does your husband think?

What would you kids think?

miss niamh

adamski8 wrote: »

miss niamh wrote: »

Hi guys,

Im originally from Dublin and emigrated to Brisbane, three years ago with my husband and two kids. I know there are probably a lot of people who would kill to be where i am now, sunshine, beaches, outdoor life blah, blah, blah...
Yep its got all that but you also have to work, pay the bills, endure peak hour traffic, put the kids in childcare, pay the rent as house prices are insane so no hope of buying, etc etc..
/QUOTE]
Your in brisbane, i feel sorry for you! just move somewhere else in austrailia

Brisbane is the cheaper of the australian cities to live in, we'd have no chance of eventually buying a house in sydney, melbourne or perth, prices there are gone through the roof. They're still overpriced here but at least more affordable than the other cities.

miss niamh

oops sorry, above post was in reply to adamski's question

miss niamh

syklops wrote: »

Ive been away nearly a year and do get bouts of serious homesickness. Sometimes its based about one particular thing, sometimes its more general. Like I miss the random conversations you have with people on public transport.

Around the time of the Thierry Henry hand ball I got very homesick. The next day I know the entire nation was talking about it. Every office, pub and workplace was a buzz but I went into my office and no one even knew about it.

I suggest you find some Irish friends and hang out with them a bit. There is an irish bar near where I live, and I am going there to for a few pints tonight and to talk to a few people I have met who are Irish. I dont think I have ever been a regular in bar where everyone was genuinely pleased to see me when I went in. Maybe find a similar niche of Irish? Be it a bar, or a club or something.

I read in an expat survival guide that homesickness comes in about 4 different phases and that the final phase occurs 3-5 years in the country. According to the article it is concidered the worst of all the phases, but once you get over it, people generally settle down and homesickness fades away for good. I dont know if it is true, and obviously everyone is different, but it sounds to me like you are in that phase.

Economically, you would be mad to consider going home right now. However never say never. I think if you say to yourself your never going home, that would make things feel worse.

Is there anything in particular that you miss?

I've had bouts of homesickness since ive been here but this is definately the worst. Thats interesting about the survival guide, it kind of makes me feel a bit better knowing this.

The main thing i miss is the family, missing out on all the family occasions, wedings, births etc. I feel bad that my children are so far away from grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins

miss niamh

Nuttzz wrote: »

Would you have to work here?

Is the traffic any better in Dublin?

Would you kids not needed to be minded here?

Are the banks lending for mortgages these days?

Are houses in Dublin priced reasonably yet?

What does your husband think?

What would you kids think?

Yes of course i would have to do all those things in ireland. I just wanted to point out that australia is not the utopia that a lot of people seem to think it is. When i tell friends in Ireland that i want to move back i get the ususal 'are you mad', 'but australia is gorgeous, the sun, beaches, what a life'
ya know????? well if its so great here then why are they still in ireland, grrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!

miss niamh

Cullen82 wrote: »

Agree with the Come Home Call.....Life's too short to spend it on the other side of the world from where you want to be. Was in Oz for long enough myself and eventually ended up feeling the same way.

The way I see it people that complain about living here (In Ireland) either

1. Have not travelled or lived abroad for a decent length of time

2. Really don't know themselves what makes them feel happy

or

3. Just complain about everything because they can & because everyone else does!

THANK YOU!

amybabes

it was probably a huge decision to move your family to australia in the first place, and will be a huge one if ye do decide to go home for good.

I'm in sydney a year now, and can say that i talk to my family and friends so much (phone, text, skype, facebook etc) that i do not get seriously homesick.
Over the next 18 months i will miss my little brother's 21st, my sisters confirmation, my cousins wedding and my parent's 25th wedding anniversary.... that are the hardest things as you said.

My uncle and his wife moved to Perth from Ireland over 30 years ago and their 3 kids were raised here. They had no family here other than themselves, but they still came home once every 2 or 3 years.
Myself, i think Australia is a gorgeous country, and a great place to raise a family in.....so many opportunities here for kids that aren't at home.


Best of luck, i hope everything works out for you! xx

miss niamh

amybabes wrote: »

it was probably a huge decision to move your family to australia in the first place, and will be a huge one if ye do decide to go home for good.

I'm in sydney a year now, and can say that i talk to my family and friends so much (phone, text, skype, facebook etc) that i do not get seriously homesick.
Over the next 18 months i will miss my little brother's 21st, my sisters confirmation, my cousins wedding and my parent's 25th wedding anniversary.... that are the hardest things as you said.

My uncle and his wife moved to Perth from Ireland over 30 years ago and their 3 kids were raised here. They had no family here other than themselves, but they still came home once every 2 or 3 years.
Myself, i think Australia is a gorgeous country, and a great place to raise a family in.....so many opportunities here for kids that aren't at home.

Best of luck, i hope everything works out for you! xx

Hi Amy, thanks for your reply.

I would be interested to hear the opportunites that are here for kids and not in Ireland. Thanks

syklops

miss niamh wrote: »

I've had bouts of homesickness since ive been here but this is definately the worst. Thats interesting about the survival guide, it kind of makes me feel a bit better knowing this.

The main thing i miss is the family, missing out on all the family occasions, wedings, births etc. I feel bad that my children are so far away from grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins

For me its not grandparents, but my parents. My dad is over 70 and my Aunt around 75, and I am terrified that I will return in a year or 3 and basically come back to a different person(or lose them while Im away). Both have health problems, and while I might hve another 10 great years with them, I could get a call tomorrow that one of them has fallen off their perch and I would never forgive myself.

Niamh, tell us about your reasoning to go to Australia. Why did you go? Whose idea was it?

I'm not trying to shift blame or point fingers but maybe if you tell us why/how you went you might start remembering some of the reasons that attracted you to the country in the first place. Talk of uprooting kids, changing jobs, moving around the globe. You have done it once already, and one would imagine it is easier to do it if your going home(Its probably not, it just feels easier).

Eve_Dublin

Hi OP, I know nothing about Australia...the Australians I have met have been a mixed bag just like any other nationality I've come across including my own (d-heads have no nation, after all!) but I've been in and out of Ireland since 2004 and have lived abroad for most of that time (currently in Spain). I know myself when I feel homesick and I can be very negative towards my host country (I'm living in Madrid now) and I tend to pick out every negative aspect of that country just to justify my reasons for wanting to return home. I think it was just after Christmas that I was having a total "hate parade" for Spain and everything associated with it...nothing was right, the people were rude and everything irritated me and I'd put Ireland up on some stupidly high pedastal. This soon died down and I've been here 8 months and I love the place. I realised my negative feelings were down to the fact that I was sad about leaving family and friends after Christmas and I was just venting that frustration.

Don't get me wrong,I DO love Ireland but there's a definite feeling of negativity in the country right now is pretty unbearable, particularly if you can't find a job. I was lucky to get a job last Summer for a few months but all the talk about the recession was doing my absolute head in. There's not a good vibe in the country at the moment and it's contagious....I became a right grumpy, moany arse during the few months I spent there. I've got some friends and family who are on anti-depressants because they lost their jobs, are bored out of their minds and got really down about it all. I know I'm painting a terrible picture of Ireland right now but this is just my own experience. Reality kicks in eventually wherever you go.

People are always commenting on how it must be like being on an extended holiday living in Spain but I'm up at 6am most days, teach for peanuts (thank God for private classes) and am home late at night and then I have to plan classes for the following day....but the good aspects of living here faaaaaar outweigh the bad. Food is great, people are actually lovely once you get past their gruff exterior, nightlife is brilliant, it's cheaper, the city is beautiful,mot of my students are sound, transport is deadly, weather is unbelievable and I spend more time outside than inside because of it etc etc. TRY and focus on the positives, OP and don't let your rose-tinted glasses version of Ireland make you miss out on them. As other posters suggested, maybe move city?

Saying all that, you might just be a home bird and in that case, move home. I can see myself returning to Ireland in the future but definitely not at the minute 'till the economy sorts itself out.

Xavi6

Kaidan wrote: »

Australians are not nice people and nice weather looses it's attraction after afew months, i have been all over the world and Ireland really is a great country.

Can't really say move back or not you really need to discuss it with your partner about jobs and uprooting kids etc etc.

Nothing beats a good sweeping generalisation. Well done :rolleyes:

davepatr07

Homesickness can be a tough one, especially when you leave behind family and close friends. I have traveled a fair bit and have lived in 2 countries outside Europe (currently in the 2nd one) Of all the places I have been to there is nothing like home. Even with all the **** going on thanks to our useless Government there is some good in Ireland that I just cant ignore. I guess it's because I'm Irish through and through and the connection is helped by the fact my family still live there. Even the 2 countries that Ive lived in they are regarded as the top places in the world for good standard of living yet I can still see flaws in their systems. No country is perfect, certainly not Ireland but it's the people that count and sometimes being with our close friends and family can outweigh any negativities around us. Ireland just needs to shift into top gear at the mo. People need to start saying this is it we'll take action and stop moaning.
Stay in Oz if you want to but what does your heart tell you, your gut instinct?

Best of luck with your decision.

What about your husband and kids?
Are they homesick? or do they like it there?

What would you and your husbands job prospects be here?
What about your childrens future? Would you rather they grew up here in Ireland or in Australia?

mfceiling

Op - think about home and weigh up is it worth it.
Ireland is fcuked - we are on the verge of going bankrupt.
We are borrowing almost half a billion euros a week to keep afloat.
There are no jobs here - none, zilch, nada
I know homesickness is a bugger but at least you have a job there and a reasonable climate.
The last 8 months here we have had record flooding, freezing temperatures, loads of snow - a few nice days of sun.

I have a brother who left home for brisbane 7 years ago.
He came home for my oul lads 60th birthday last year - he couldn't wait to get back - yeah it was great to see him but after a couple of days he said he could feel old routines, habits etc from home just creeping in.
He said the locals in the pub were still in the same seats, telling the same stories - almost like a time warp.

What about coming home for a holiday to see does the feelings wear off?

I came home from oz 9 years ago cause my missus (then girlfriend) missed her mum.
I would go back in the morning even though she wouldn't.
Great country for kids - loads to do outdoors.

Just my tuppence worth!!

OS119

miss niamh wrote: »

...I would be interested to hear the opportunites that are here for kids and not in Ireland. Thanks

going outside?

not living in a state that will experience 25% spending cuts for the next 10 years (education, health, social services, law enforcement etc..), not living in one of the most politically corrupt and incompetently managed states in Europe?

feeling homesick might be a drag, but you probably didn't move out there on a whim and for no reason. whatever those reasons were, the ecomonic and political situation in Ireland just made them ten-fold.

Jumpy

miss niamh wrote: »

definately dave, irish people are definatley more genuine and real, .

You have got to be taking the piss. Its a rare trait here that you get someone who actually says stuff to your face.

Jumpy

Kaidan wrote: »

Australians are not nice people and nice weather looses it's attraction after afew months, i have been all over the world and Ireland really is a great country.

Can't really say move back or not you really need to discuss it with your partner about jobs and uprooting kids etc etc.

Actually, we are incredible bull**** spotters. We spot it and our attitude to you will reflect just that. Plus a lot of people have the "big man in a small county" syndrome when they visit, so rate very high on the bull**** meter.
Dont mistake honesty for "not being nice".

amybabes

hey,

yeah exactly what the previous posters have said - being able to spend so much time outdoors, all the clubs and facilities that are here, the events and family oriented festivals
my housemate is a primary school teacher here and the schools seem so much better than home, better curriculum, activities, opportunities.

Even university wise - i came straight here after doing my degree at home and am so sorry i didnt look into doing it in oz....so much choice in my area, better subjects, more opportunitites.

I see your point - when my partner and i start having our family, it will be very tempting to return to ireland to have the support of family and friends, but i do think raising a family here would be in our best interests, at least for the next 10 years (by the sounds of how bad things are at home)

Eve_Dublin

Jumpy wrote: »

Actually, we are incredible bull**** spotters. We spot it and our attitude to you will reflect just that. Plus a lot of people have the "big man in a small county" syndrome when they visit, so rate very high on the bull**** meter.
Dont mistake honesty for "not being nice".

An even worse trait of the Irish is our propensity to knock each other down. I don't see how pointing out the negative traits of Irish people is a good argument not to move home. There's obviously very good reasons why you've chosen to live in the country. EVERY nation has it's faults...sometimes I found the Australian "say it like it is" attitude tactless and borderline rude. Choose your battles carefully: make a stand when there is a need but otherwise what's the point, you're just provoking a negative reaction for the sake of it or being controversial and wreaking the heads of those around you in the process. I'm certainly not a b-shytter and neither are my friends...but I know plenty. Maybe it has something to do with having to "put up and shut up" for a very long time throughout our history.

Poloman

Niamh

I (myself and my fiance) have just sent forms to Australia for emigration.. not for a work visa but for permenant residency. I have a great job here and my own home etc but I want out. The way this country is being run sickens me.. you wouldn't believe the corruption going on here.

Yes Ireland is not a bad place to live but there is so much to gain in Australia even for cost of living and value for money.

What I will miss the most is my parents.. i.e. how many more times will I actually see them before they pass away.. but thats somethign you have to weigh up. I will try and get them to move over to Oz and they can come visit for a month at a time as they are retired now. I'm just retiring from playing sports now and I will miss that but they will have that there too! I will miss premiership matches unless I stay up until all hours watching them down under but I will grow out of that and get in Sydney Rugby Super 14's or something. I know we will make friends wherever we go its just a matter of making the effort. And I will have my partner with me as do you. Even for the weather alone I think its worth moving. Watching your kids play outside is a lot in life.

Everyone is different and of course I will miss Ireland and my friends here but when I have kids I want whats best for them and I think australia has far more opportunities. Is it really worth considering moving home to... nothing. The cost of everything here is a joke. There is less money here and prices keep increasing. Its so hard to do anything.

Think of the reasons you moved there in the first place. Remember.. you have your family now.. you will have your kids birthdays, graduations etc all that to look forward to. You have made a big step to leave Ireland for a reason. Sit yourself down and refresh your memory of why you did this.

My advice is to stay put or move somewhere other than Brisbane. And forwhoever said the weather gets boring after a while sorry pal Australia is measured on an outdoors lifestyle. How many days of the year have we rain here? Eg you can plan to have a BBQ at a weekend not wake up hoping its not raining in the middle of june and july! :rolleyes:

PS.. I saw a program before about emigrating and returning. Three families came back to ireland.. they sold up and went to oz, then sold up and came home so they lost a lot of money (this is your childrens inheritence). And.. all three returned to oz as they couldnt believe they came back to Ireland! You have this romantic idea of Ireland now that we are all holding hands and singing songs in the pub every week. 2 weeks ago I was threatened to be stabbed by some knacker on the street. There are lots of idiots, in every city all over the world. Simple as.

LoanShark

Sisko wrote: »

Whats so bad about the aussies anyway?

UM....Well, Aussie, Kinda, Take, A, Long, Time, To, Say, A, Scentence, And, Stuff!!...And they have big Ass Spiders!

OP Seriously, If you and your husband have good steady jobs, Stay where you are for at least another year/two years max...

Everything is going to the wire..
Brisbane isn't the worst place on Gods planet, The way of life in Oz is brilliant.. I was there two years ago when travelling, Had I known then what I now know,I would still be there...I came April 2008 and I have only worked 9 months (contract work) out of the last 24..I have been sitting out of work for the last eight months..

It is depressing..Stay put for another while..

MrsA

I have not read all the replies, but, I WAS you. I was in Melbourne with a baby and one on the way.

We came home because we missed home and Ireland and all that, and wow what a mistake. I miss Melbourne every day.

We have now moved to Canada and the plan is to move back to Australia when the opportunity arises.

Come home for a long holiday, but, don't give up on your life over there, it really is better. I have done both!

Satyr_The_Great

stay where you are..OZ is a good spot to be in. A cousin of mine is a fitter out there and doing well, and a friend of mine is moving out there at the end of next month. Say hi to Alf from home and away for me while yer at it :-P

LegacyUser

Lemme tell you something. A 'lifestyle' cannot replace 'people'. Great, you have sunshine and BBQs and beaches but who do you share them with? Who do you want to share them with?
99% of people will tell you it's not where you are, it's who you're with that matters.
It's all well and good people saying you have it handy in Brisbane but your parents, siblings etc are not there.
I lived in Oz for 5 years, I liked the country. I did not miss Ireland but I did miss my family and for me, that's what mattered more. My parents were getting on, my sister was ill and they meant more to me than any cheap booze or guaranteed summers.

On an economic point, now is not a good time to come back to Ireland, but save as much as you can and see how the land lies in a couple of years' time.

eth0_

Kaidan wrote: »

Australians are not nice people and nice weather looses it's attraction after afew months, i have been all over the world and Ireland really is a great country.

How the hell can you say Australians on the whole are "not nice people"? If you said Africans or Indians "are not nice people", the mods would be down on you like a ton of bricks.

You can't generalise about an entire country in that way.

OP I think you'd be crazy to move back to Ireland. I've been back here for 5 months and I can't wait to get out again. I think once you've lived away from Ireland for a while you can see even more clearly the level of incompetence, ineptitude and corruption that is creeping through this country like a disease.

LegacyUser

The HSE has had a recruitment freeze for the last 2 years. The Assoc of Directors of Nursing & Midwifery said the other day that there is a shortage of 5000 nurses in the country and they are not being replaced as they retire/emigrate. The recruitment freeze is likely to carry on for as long as we have this government and maybe into the next government too. The budgets are continuously overrun so there won't be much agency nursing either.

Unemployment is rising, there's less money for education, all the public service has had pay cuts including nurses. They want to bring in water charges. The conditions of work in the HSE are so crappy and the pension lump-sum will be taxed so everyone who can take early retirement is taking it, leaving us even more short-staffed.

You don't say how old your kids are, or what your husband works at.

Read the Irish newspapers!

miss niamh

Jumpy wrote: »

You have got to be taking the piss. Its a rare trait here that you get someone who actually says stuff to your face.

Sorry jumpy, you are of course correct.

See what mad nonsense gets into my head in the grip of homesickness?
I have now removed the rose tinted specs for a while.