Conversing with females.

xp0

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

Hagar

Wrong forum, sits back and waits.:D

Fear Uladh

Money usually helps OP.

xp0

69 wrote: »

Wrong forum, sits back and waits.:D

What section should I of posted in?

Lil' Smiler

Maybe this doesn't help...

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=64142346&postcount=9

biko

You should try Personal Issues OP.

xp0

Lil' Smiler wrote: »

Maybe this doesn't help...

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=64142346&postcount=9

and then again maybe it does, some women like to be dominated.

biko

How would you know?

Dave!

Try "I like your boobs"

Women love compliments

Glad to help

Regards

Dave

WindSock

xp0 wrote: »

and then again maybe it does, some women like to be dominated.

So what are you nervous for exactly? Do you idolise women so much or do you despise them to the point of feeling threatened?

xp0

Dave! wrote: »

Try "I like your boobs"

Women love compliments

Glad to help

Regards

Dave

I tried this once, followed by a quick grab. This resulted in a slap.

Trashbat

xp0 wrote: »

I tried this once, followed by a quick grab. This resulted in a slap.

Thats your problem right there. Never go for the grab after verbally drawing attention to that part of the body.

Be ninja, surprise is your friend.

Although also be aware, this type of behaviour is never not creepy.

OutlawPete

Is Abi awake?

podgemonster

Maybe take the advice given to Ben Stiller in Something about Mary; Clean the pips/interrogate the prisoner/flog the dolphin before going out that way you aint got it on the brain. If your 26 and havn't gotten a ride you must be pretty handy at it by now...

xp0

Trashbat wrote: »

Thats your problem right there. Never go for the grab after verbally drawing attention to that part of the body.

Be ninja, surprise is your friend.

Although also be aware, this type of behaviour is never not creepy.

I occasionally go into nightclubs and perform this practice on drunk girls, they don't fight back..

stovelid

You have a brightly coloured tail hidden under your arse bone. When you see a suitable female, spread it out and wave it in their direction.

Result: sex storm.

xp0

podgemonster wrote: »

Maybe take the advice given to Ben Stiller in Something about Mary; Clean the pips/interrogate the prisoner/flog the dolphin before going out that way you aint got it on the brain. If your 26 and havn't gotten a ride you must be pretty handy at it by now...

I have several subscriptions to porn websites, it's all I have..

star.chaser

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

thanks for making me laugh first thing monday morning.

ibarelycare

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

Awww this reminds me of one of my first kisses.

Then he came in his pants

xzanti

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

xp0

:pac:

Kiera

Dave! wrote: »

Try "I like your boobs"

Women love compliments

Glad to help

Regards

Dave

Do this is you want a swift kick to the nads!

Sea Sharp

Go abroad. Your sexy Irish accent is a guaranteed ice-breaker.

Caoimhín

If there is even a hint of attraction I turn into a bumbling idiot.

But then im a bumbling idiot anyway.

quad_red

ibarelycare wrote: »

Awww this reminds me of one of my first kisses.

Then he came in his pants

You must be seriously good.

OutlawPete

quad_red wrote: »

You must be seriously good looking.

FYP

Kiera

Caoimhín wrote: »

If there is even a hint of attraction I turn into a bumbling idiot.

But then im a bumbling idiot anyway.

^^^ this is me. Cant for the life of me talk to someone i fancy the pants off!

orourkeda

Howya love?

Hows your box?

Works for me

Hagar

So that's why you avoid me.

Kiera

69 wrote: »

So that's why you avoid me.

bluiman loakdngf frianlf kialehn

Yes

Trashbat

Maybe you should buy this t-shirt

If you think you can handle that much poon

WindSock

orourkeda wrote: »

Howya love?

Hows your box?

Works for me

'Wanna go halves on a bastard?' always does it for me

ibarelycare

quad_red wrote: »

You must be seriously good.

Oh I am

ibarelycare

[Serious answer]

OP you should spend a lot of time practising talking to girls that you aren't attracted to and build up your confidence from there.

Abi

OutlawPete wrote: »

Is Abi awake?

Sorry Pete, can't help the lad. There wouldn't be much conversing :cool:

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

bonerm

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

Just imagine them with their clothes off. Oh wait, you're already doing that.

j1974

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

noticeable erection? noticeable to who?? you or them?? this is funny. If this is a serious issue or mail, ignore all the other posts of ridicule and go see someone who deals in anxietly dissorders, that's what this sounds like.
I find some men hold women way too high in their regard, so high that it seems quite surreal if the women interacts with them. women are just as bothered, worried, insecure and nervous as any man can be. Take them off the pedastal and treat them like you've no agenda. If you weren't imagining them all naked you'd be less nervous. Jack Nicholson grew up in a house full of women as the only guy in the house. Forget the looks thing, dont dwell on it. Have you ever noticed some guys in work go out with cracking girls they met (in work)and they're not that handsome and you wonder, hey??? howd that happen. Usually cos the girl is working with the guy and so gets so know him over weeks, the person, then she starts to fancy him and the rest writes itself!! girls are not as shallow as ya think. bottom line I believe, women love to be made laugh and feel at ease. They also love a good ride, but thats a different kettle of fish, if indeed you keep your fish in a kettle. strange tasting tea, not too good for the fish I imagine!

Kold

One thing you should remember when speaking to a woman... They're usually weaker than you.

Kiera

Kold wrote: »

One thing you should remember when speaking to a woman... They're usually weaker than you.

:eek: oh no he didnt!

WIZE

Kold wrote: »

One thing you should remember when speaking to a woman... They're usually weaker than you.

Not in the Mind .

I will always give up an Arguement with my Girlfriend. She knows how to Win

im weak:(

Pepe LeFrits

roffle Kold

jester77

You need some tips from Jeff Murdoch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBSnlADrbyY

Lux23

ibarelycare wrote: »

[Serious answer]

OP you should spend a lot of time practising talking to girls that you aren't attracted to and build up your confidence from there.

A 26 year old virgin would fine every female attractive, maybe he could practice on cross dressers.

Fratton Fred

Go see a professional. It could be the €100 you ever spend.

Dun laoire

stovelid wrote: »

You have a brightly coloured tail hidden under your arse bone. When you see a suitable female, spread it out and wave it in their direction.

Result: sex storm.

if that fails you can always leave your scent on lamposts outside the likes of your abrekebabra's, burger kings etc....

Bonito

YO OP.

http://daviddoctorrose.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/getsomenuts.jpg

FlutterinBantam

xp0 wrote: »

Hi.

I'm 26 and sadly to admit still a virgin I've never even got the shift. I find talking to girls hard, quite literally.. I get a noticeable erection and the shakes, and I just can't concentrate on what they're saying.

Has anyone any tips on talking to girls? I really need help.

Thanks in advance.

xp0

Just pull out the chopper and wave it around , the bang of helmet cheese will have them frothing like bottled bass in no time.

Good bang of sour helmet always loosens them up.

WindSock

Fratton Fred wrote: »

Go see a professional. It could be the €100 you ever spend.

It looks like your avatar is personally endorsing your statement :pac:

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Just give up OP.

Women are like car parking places.
All the good ones are gone and the rest are handicapped.

force majeure

This idea is too be considered with caution.
Smile nicely at a woman [stress the word woman as you would not want to get caught with some scared stiff young one] give her a mild wink and then return to reading your paper. If every so often you look up from said paper give her a one second glance, no STARING dammit, unless you are a total pug ugly she should return you a nice smile while flicking through her hair. All going to plan pass her by around now and say Hi their what time is you next lunch break.
I well let you work out the rest. :cool:

PS if she is married it may get messy if she is a lisbo you have my apology.

Blitzkrieger

Jacoby Panicky Self-preservation wrote: »

Women are like car parking places.
All the good ones are gone and the rest are handicapped.

But if you think nobody's looking you'll stick it in anyway?