Where Has The Ex Gone??!

El Diablo 101

Hello ladies!

Just wanting a womens opinion on where your ex has gone to. Do you still speak to him? Are you guys friends? Best friends? Maybe you are enemies .

What category do you put him in? Friend zone? Randomer? A what-was-I-thinking category?

Where has yours gone?

krudler

What an utterly random question...

princess-lala

My last two 1. Hes dead 2. Im texting him now, things didnt work out but hes one of my best friends & no friends with benefits either!

Where has yours gone??

Orla K

Only one and he died

Stargazer7

We were friends for a few months before we started going on...went out for a year and a bit. Had lots of fun together but ended messily with him breaking it off...once half-heartedly and then again a few months later for good. Stayed friends all the way through even though I was pretty upset....I took about 6months to get over it.

Still friends now, in fact probably best friends. It's down to sticking it out and him really wanting the friendship no matter what. As do I.

psycho-hope

1. bad break up so we dont talk anymore
2. still talk to , still good friends

Clare Bear

I don't talk to any of my ex's. I just find it easier that way. Especially the 3 year relationship, that hit me hard and even though it ended 4 years ago I'm still scared of even bumping in to him...I'm sure he'd be happy to see me but it took me a long time to get over him so I don't want to revisit that pain again. The others I wouldn't mind saying hello to if I saw them and have a quick catch up but that's about it really. I'd love to be one of these people that can be friends with their ex's but that's not me.

MissIT

Texing him now first time we have had contact in a good while. Id put him in the not friends, what the hell was Ithinking, but still miss him catagory.

Wolflikeme

Clare Bear wrote: »

I don't talk to any of my ex's. I just find it easier that way. Especially the 3 year relationship, that hit me hard and even though it ended 4 years ago I'm still scared of even bumping in to him...I'm sure he'd be happy to see me but it took me a long time to get over him so I don't want to revisit that pain again. The others I wouldn't mind saying hello to if I saw them and have a quick catch up but that's about it really. I'd love to be one of these people that can be friends with their ex's but that's not me.

Snap. My last ex called it with me (after I'd broke up with her and we got back together and then she broke up with me for the same reason I broke up with her in the first place! :mad:) and I just wouldn't be interested in being friends. I've a 'leave it in the past' type of attitude. Not forget, but rather remember it and leave it there, in time. As lame as that sounds! :pac:

Having said that I do speak to one, we kind of grew up together and our family's are friends so...

Pretty_Pistol

With my last ex we stayed friends for awhile until he said he wanted us to go out again. I wasn't interested at all as he became a what-was-I-thinking. I would have been happy to stay friends but he got very pissed off when I didn't want to go back out with him so we havin't spoken since. Meh

Joey the lips

I have only ever had one girlfriend... Complicated.... I was considering being a priest for years... I know..:rolleyes:. I fancied the traveling to save the world. not in a religios sense..:p

anyway I married her. we have been through a lot... I am not easy to live with.

The funny thing is I get on better with her ex's then she does. She thinks I am strange. I figure I am lucky as I have her.

anyway. I hope I never have to answer this question truly.

Faith

I've no significant ex's, but of the not-significant ones, I'm only in contact with 1 (well, 2 maybe). The others were out of my life as soon as we finished. The one I'm in contact with, I rarely speak to these days, and I'd rather not bump into him in the pub or anything. I don't know why; I just don't want to see him. Then I've another friend who I was in love with, and we briefly got together but it didn't last. We're still friends, but not a fraction as close as we used to be.

Novella

My first boyfriend - first, I won't say love, but the first person I ever had major feelings for - he's on msn at the moment. He just asked me what would I eat if I could only eat one thing for the rest of my life. I wouldn't really classify him as a friend. Is that terrible? I don't know. We broke up, it was horrible, I was devastated. We didn't speak for ages and then one day last summer, he sent me a message on Bebo and now we chat about the tiniest of things, but have never once discussed us being together or breaking up. Talking to him now is like talking to a completely different guy than the one I sat beside, terrified, in his parents car when he was learning how to drive.

The second major earner of my affections, well, I wouldn't consider us friends anymore either, sadly. We're on speaking terms. We broke up. We spoke every day, then it became five days a week, four, two, once a week. Now it's a quick hello if I see him on the street. Now it's lying in bed wondering if he remembers what we were doing this time three years ago, wondering if maybe it never happened at all and that's why it feels like I'm the only one who cares, who still feels it. Jesus, when did I become bitter?!

The third, the one who mattered the most and never knew it. Funnily enough, we don't speak at all!

krudler

Oh, people are going along with this, alright then

last one, is engaged to the guy she started seeing after me, but I have a strong suspicion she got together with him before we broke up, seemed to much of a coincidence that she wound up going out with a guy that worked with her in a job she only started a month before we broke up, shes his problem now We havent spoken since the night we broke up, a 3 year relationship ended on saturday night, she called over to collect what stuff was at my place the sunday while i was at work, left her key there, havent ever met or spoken since, cleanest breakup ever

One before that got dumped as she cheated on me,met her out one night and she broke down in flood of tears saying how sorry she was and she'd never met anyone afterwards she felt about like me, didnt have a bit of sympathy for her, she should have realised that when she was ramming her tongue down some other guys throat, cheaters deserve their misery.

My important ex. We aren't talking right now, because it wasn't helping the moving on being friends.
I hope that isn't it though. I would like to be friends in future, when we are settled with other people.

My fall back guy....You know....the one worth a do over..... The grasshole just got married. :eek:

SeekUp

Don't talk to/am not friends with/am not around any of my ex-boyfriends. I don't have and hard feelings for any of them - or any feelings at all, really - or anything like that, they're just in the past, and we've gone our separate ways.

princess-lala

Moonbaby wrote: »

My fall back guy....You know....the one worth a do over..... The grasshole just got married. :eek:

I had one of them too, he got engaged and the night of his party the missus got locked - he text me to see was there any chance of a jump :rolleyes:

Wolflikeme

princess-lala wrote: »

I had one of them too, he got engaged and the night of his party the missus got locked - he text me to see was there any chance of a jump :rolleyes:

Idiot. I actually feel sorry for people like him.

princess-lala

Wolflikeme wrote: »

Idiot. I actually feel sorry for people like him.

I think its so funny that they cant be happy with one person!

El Diablo 101

princess-lala wrote: »

I think its so funny that they cant be happy with one person!

I agree. I kinda feel sorry for them in a way!

Wolflikeme

princess-lala wrote: »

I think its so funny that they cant be happy with one person!

It's a curse I tell ya!

I always think I want more and messed things up in the passed because of it. When I'm with the right person though, it's easy. She's gone now. The b!tch! Just kiddin'.

I mean who'd get engaged if you were like that? Do they wake up one day and decide they're going to live a lie?!

sleepyescapade

Still see the main one as he's in my class, don't talk much anymore but it's not awkward just different friends/interests etc.

princess-lala

Wolflikeme wrote: »

I mean who'd get engaged if you were like that? Do they wake up one day and decide they're going to live a lie?!

I dont understand it at all! Hes married now and up on one of her best friends!! Its all madness!

Now I know why Im single!

PCPhoto

recently got back with an ex (we were together for about 12months - 3/4yrs ago)

Anyway - I broke it off last time and recently we got talking and ....well... decided to give it a go.... am still in contact with some of previous girlfriends, I try to stay friends, most of my previous relationships kinda ended smoothly - relationship had run its course.

my only problem is I was making moves on a girl a couple of weeks before myself and GF got back together and I've had to explain to the other girl that I had gotten back with an Ex, that I did like her but now that I'm in a relationship I cant see her...or send flirty text etc. (its a half regret that I never got the chance to find out what could have been....but ...

when life offers a second chance with someone you get along with perfectly.... you either grab it with both hands ...or let it slip through your fingers.

Wolflikeme

princess-lala wrote: »

I dont understand it at all! Hes married now and up on one of her best friends!! Its all madness!

Now I know why Im single!

Oh my God!! Jeez. I mean it's all going to come to a head. So not worth the hassle!

Yeah I hear ya, life's a lot less complicated these days!

shivvyban

My policy is avoidance!! :rolleyes:

Creamy Goodness

Gone to Poland to do a phd.

akamossy

I don't speak to any of my exs anymore, used to speak to the only significant one up until recently but it got a bit messy so decided to stop that for my own sake

Ickle Magoo

I have no idea. I don't stay friends with exes, I have plenty of friends - I don't want or need the complications of being friends with someone I have been in love with or who has an intimate knowledge of me.

I have an good to okay relationship with my ex husband id even go so far as to say we are friends...when we split up first i was inclined to wallow in self pity... woe is me and all that..then i realised that i was beginning to enjoy the victim role a bit too much!....

iv had a few relationships after that.. one ex i use to meet for lunch and we'd txt and talk a bit..don't know what i think about that maybe wasn't healthy..hes move too far away for us to meet much up much anymore...the others well i never feel out with any of them so id get the odd txt....one was a bit odd and i didn't want to keep in touch with him....one wanted to be friends with me but couldn't get over his ego so he just annoyed me..

im now in a relationship and im going to spend the rest of my life with him..so thats it realy

sorrywhat

Havent a clue where the first one is but over the years where I have seen him, he has gotten fatter He was a pr!ck towards the end of the relationship.

The other one was my best friend but when I broke up with him we didnt talk for years. Only started talking again last year and we text every now and then. Slowly building back up a friendship.

smileysurfer

Still chat occasionally to a few ex's, my last one however , havent heard from since dumping day, who knew he was such a bast@*d! :eek::(:mad:

Now that feels better!

jellie

im presuming my ex is still where he always was & hopefully he stays there & i never have to see him again.

Kinetic^

I don't know where they're gone but I'm happy I've not seen either of them ever again, weirdos. 3rd time is a charm

That_Guy

2 ex's.

1- Not sure tbh.
2- Don't care.

I've had unbelievably bad luck with girls. Two meaningful relationsips and two texts to say I'm dumped. Bleedin' joke. Don't really give a toss about them and I don't wanna ever talk to them again tbh.

Smart Bug

Clare Bear wrote: »

I don't talk to any of my ex's. I just find it easier that way. Especially the 3 year relationship, that hit me hard and even though it ended 4 years ago I'm still scared of even bumping in to him...I'm sure he'd be happy to see me but it took me a long time to get over him so I don't want to revisit that pain again. The others I wouldn't mind saying hello to if I saw them and have a quick catch up but that's about it really. I'd love to be one of these people that can be friends with their ex's but that's not me.

Don't usually post here but I had to when I read this - I'm exactly the same but I thought I was the only one (well I seem to be out of my mates anyway)!

The only problem is I sometimes meet the one serious ex of 4 or something years ago when I'm hammered and in happy-friendly-drunk mode. Even though I did the breaking up it hit me hard at the time, & the last time I met her she tore lumps outta me. The others I'd just have the few words with, it weirds me out being friends with someone I danced the horizontal tango with.

Sephiroth_dude

I dont speak to any of my exs Im better off without them.

Wibbs

2 major ones. The first we would be in contact maybe once a year? The second? Well that was a headwreck of epic proportions. I think the mechanism broke after that one Cant see myself in another long termer again TBH.

LadyMayBelle

1st: Went out for over a year, met once after we broke up( about two years after) for a drink and a catch up. Friends with his sister but no idea what he is at now.

2nd: In the UK and we have occasional birthday/ christmas facebook contact. That was only a summer fling anyways but he was so lovely, a real gent.

Funny how you can spend so much time with one person and then never see them again.

Maple

1 - not a month goes by when I don't hear from him in some shape or form but we can't keep it friendly. There is too much history there, we broke up over life choices and not because we fell out of love which was infinitely hard. It just gets complicated and drags us backwards so every few months we stop talking but the longest that's ever lasted is 6 months despite us breaking up 6/7 years ago. Have so much love and affection and respect for him. He's great.

2. Nothing. Zip. Nada. Doesn't bother me at all either, am just indifferent to his existence and there are times I wonder how we went out at all. It's terrible but I don't really count it as a relationship, eek.

3. Occasional email and it's always him who initiates contact. But the relationship was a trainwreck of the hugest proportions, I actually couldn't have him in my life anymore. It would be just too much....too much feeling to have around. I want to get to a stage where I feel about him like I do about number 2 but I dont know if I ever will.

G86

I've dated a few guys casually over the past 2 years since I split with my ex of 5 years but I wouldn't really consider many of them actual exes, because few of them got to the stage where I'd refer to them as boyfriends, if that makes sense?! I was happy being single and dating and I never really met anyone who held my interest for long enough (til I met the amazing guy I'm with now that is -ccheeesssse! ). I'd still speak to a few of those guys though on facebook or whatever and it's grand because it was never serious and no-one really got hurt.

It's funny this thread came up though because yesterday one of those guys told me that his new girlfriend blew a fuse when she found out he still chatted to me, and told him he wasn't allowed to anymore - I thought that was a bit mental! I was chatting to my boyfriend about it and he was asking why I was pissed off about it as the guy wasn't a close friend or anything, but I think I was just a bit pissed off that some random chick I didn't know decided someone couldn't chat to me anymore with no good reason! I just told the guy it was grand though, I mean who am I to get the way way of true love eh:pac: (not that I realised I was in the way at all!)

I never speak to my long term ex anymore, the breakup was down to me and he just wasn't in the headspace to go on as friends so I had to respect that.

Kya1976

My first Irish bf I still text now and then, we are on alright terms. But I wouldn't consider him a friend as such.

My ex husband I talk to on a weekly basis, we were together for ten years and its just over about a year.
I wouldn't say we are on great terms but we can talk.
I was hoping it was gonna be easier to get on after we broke up but there's too much water under the bridge.:(

El Diablo 101

Wibbs wrote: »

2 major ones. The first we would be in contact maybe once a year? The second? Well that was a headwreck of epic proportions. I think the mechanism broke after that one Cant see myself in another long termer again TBH.

Awh man, that sucks. Not being in a long-termer again is a direct result of the headwreck?

Raze_them_all

Let's see, 1 ex I completely cut contact with. Another I think the the only words spoken in the last two years was the word ****.

Apart from them I'm pretty much in contact with all my ex's, would consider most of us friends and sometimes have a throw back with one or two

Malari

There was only one important ex. He's not in the country. We have mutual friends, but I try to avoid him. I have nothing to say him to him any more. Out of indifference rather than any animosity.

Snowie

ones doing a phd in phscoligy or something mad..the others in australia getting very drunk i would presume.

BraziliaNZ

i broke up with someone last week after 18 months on and off, due to long distance issues mainly, she in England now. I feel pretty depressed about it but I think she's right. Anyway I've decided not to talk to her anymore. It'll only upset both of us. Thus begins a new chapter!

Wibbs

El Diablo 101 wrote: »

Awh man, that sucks. Not being in a long-termer again is a direct result of the headwreck?

yep pretty much. Not so much cynicism but just meh. I seem to have one of those one, maybe two shot hearts going on. Its not a woe is me thing though. I just cant see it happening again. Hey it might happen tomorrow!

Joey the lips

Wibbs wrote: »

yep pretty much. Not so much cynicism but just meh. I seem to have one of those one, maybe two shot hearts going on. Its not a woe is me thing though. I just cant see it happening again. Hey it might happen tomorrow!

I though it terriable as well but I catch your drift now.... They say thats when you find it.... When your not looking

barbiegirl

One I think is still in his home town, no contact and no interest really.
Second lives I think here in Dublin still and a friend said she saw him last year with a girl and child, unsure if it was his child. Whilst curious I've no interest in seeing him.
As to other less serious boyfriends I'm still friends or at least talk to them when I see them, which can be quite regularly, I'm from a small town.
I've not really fallen out with anybody just moved on to my gorgeous hubbie :-)

ERR!

hmmm my ex is living with his current girlfriend am not bothered by it at all.. we dont really talk anymore nothing really left to talk about! the 2nd ex we dont talk bad break up, i wasn't in love with him anymore he did not take it very well