Scumbag Romance

redout

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

Lexus1976

redout wrote: »

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

ha

How Soon Is Now

God if there where no ''Scumbags'' around what would half of ya s talk bout on here ?

BluesBerry

Probably Dublin 4 peoples romances."loike do you want to totally get engaged blossom"





There is snow on the ground

Canard

And they'd have lirrul Anto, and Liamo, and Johno, and Chantel...

Keano

Dublin City Forum that way

---

>

Dancor

Curious question, but does anyone actually know anybody by the name of ''Jacinta''?

Ive come accross my fair share of scobes in life and never met anyone by that name.

Caoimhín

Sieg Heil Mein Führer!

Sterilization is the key.;)

How Soon Is Now

Dancor wrote: »

Curious question, but does anyone actually know anybody by the name of ''Jacinta''?

Ive come accross my fair share of scobes in life and never met anyone by that name.

Ya i worked with a girl from talla called Jacinta she aint a scumbag either still mates with her

keano_afc

\Frada "Which town"? \Frada

Jet Black

Dancor wrote: »

Curious question, but does anyone actually know anybody by the name of ''Jacinta''?

Ive come accross my fair share of scobes in life and never met anyone by that name.

Yep and she 'got it into her' by half the office.

Dyr

The old virgin mega store is scumbag central alright,

Palmerstown_guy

There is nothing better/worse than Dublin scumbags that are in love...sure they only create even more scumbag babies and around it goes...;)

stovelid

redout wrote: »

Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta"

There must be millions of teenage Jacintas in Dublin, even though I've never met one or heard of one. Yet they seem to feature in every scumbag story on boards.

Strange.

AnonoBoy

stovelid wrote: »

There must be millions of teenage Jacintas in Dublin, even though I've never met one or heard of one. Yet they seem to feature in every scumbag story on boards.

Strange.

Indeed. And they regularly seem to be riding Antos. Odd that.

I feel sorry for the lad. He did a Feeky McGee on it, put himself out there and went for the prize and got shot down in a cruel public fashion.

Chin up old boy, your day will come.

de_mirelurk

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Chin up old boy, your day will come.

I'm unclear on this last point. Do you mean the day of the conviction or the day of the sentencing?

Jesus Wept

redout wrote: »

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

An addidas dedicated scumbag and a nike scumbag getting together?
That's a Christmas miracle right there.

funk-you

Keano A Legend wrote: »

Dublin City Forum that way

---

>

keano_afc wrote: »

\Frada "Which town"? \Frada

Just because it happened in Dublin doesn't make the topic Dublin specific.

-Funk

g-whizz

funk-you wrote: »

Just because it happened in Dublin doesn't make the topic Dublin specific.

-Funk

why do you feel the need to sign every post you make?
stevie wonder can see who you are!

monkeypants

redout wrote: »

"I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta."

Possibly the best rejection ever.

funk-you

g-whizz wrote: »

why do you feel the need to sign every post you make?
stevie wonder can see who you are!

Why do you feel the need to have a big signature taking up more of my screen? Oh, I geddit. It's only annoying if it's above the line. Seriously dude, get a hobby.

-Funk

Boom_Bap

stovelid wrote: »

There must be millions of teenage Jacintas in Dublin, even though I've never met one or heard of one. Yet they seem to feature in every scumbag story on boards.

Strange.

I was working in Kenya a couple of weeks back and got chatting to a security guard of the building. She told me her name was Jacinta and i near pee pee'd myself. So i know more Jacinta's in Kenya than i do in Ireland.

hinault

Judge not, lest ye be judged.

stovelid

AnonoBoy wrote: »

I feel sorry for the lad. He did a Feeky McGee on it, put himself out there and went for the prize and got shot down in a cruel public fashion.

Some of the scumbag spoof tales often have dramatic merit but are fatally compromised by the lack of research in topical working class names.

Bluscreendream

Caoimhín wrote: »

Sieg Heil Mein Führer!

Sterilization is the key.;)

Absolutely... Let's usher through that neutering bill

MagicMarker

The-Rigger wrote: »

An addidas dedicated scumbag and a nike scumbag getting together?
That's a Christmas miracle right there.

It's the sequal to ''Across the Barricades''.

Kradock

redout wrote: »

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

Alot of pissing oneself going on in Dublin. No wonder the place stinks.:pac:

Kradock

Boom_Bap wrote: »

I was working in Kenya a couple of weeks back and got chatting to a security guard of the building. She told me her name was Jacinta and i near pee pee'd myself. So i know more Jacinta's in Kenya than i do in Ireland.

It's now happening in Kenya, though it is described in a more juvenile manner.

Fuhrer

Caoimhín wrote: »

Sieg Heil Mein Führer!

Sterilization is the key.;)

I agree!

arybvtcw0eolkf

The-Rigger wrote: »

An addidas dedicated scumbag and a nike scumbag getting together?
That's a Christmas miracle right there.

Nope, this is the magical spirit of Christmas!.

bullets

When the third matrix film was on in the cinema had a knacker couple sit
in the seat directly in front of me (even though there were plenty of others)

The decided to wear the face off each other and more! they had their hand
jammed down each other's crotches where she was giving yer man a tug job,
and he looked like he was trying to start a fire with the friction of his hands on her bush. She Finished him off, before cleaning her hands by flicking her fingers, he proceeded to open a bottle of coke and smell his own fingers,
and yer wan looked up and said rather loudly Oi! that's Keano Reeves! before
leaving the cinema. Yer man give's me dagger eyes as if to say what your problem!

I got two shows for the price of one! :eek:

~B

de_mirelurk

The-Rigger wrote: »

An addidas dedicated scumbag and a nike scumbag getting together?
That's a Christmas miracle right there.

It's practically intercultural, I wonder if a potential hybrid resulting from this rare coupling would be something akin to either Reebok or Umbro dedicated baglings.
/me rushes off to find some early works of Richard Dawkins.

Found something:

Richard Dawkins, The Blind Watchmaker, Chapter 6, opening lines wrote:

Chance, luck, coincidence, miracle. One of the main topics of this chapter is miracles and what we mean by them. My thesis will be that events that we commonly call miracles are not supernatural, but are part of a spectrum of more-or-less improbable natural events. A miracle, in other words, if it occurs at all, is a tremendous stroke of luck. Events don't fall neatly into natural events versus miracles.

There are some would-be events that are too improbable to be contemplated, but we can't know this until we have done a calculation. And to do the calculation, we must know how much time was available, more generally how many opportunities were available, for the event to occur. Given infinite time, or infinite opportunities, anything is possible.

Why it's almost as if Dawkins is talking about these scumbags isn't it?

Malice

funk-you wrote: »

Why do you feel the need to have a big signature taking up more of my screen?

You can turn off signatures - go to your user control panel, select Edit Options from the left hand side and in the Thread Display Options section, untick the Show Signatures box.

On topic, I know two Jacintas, one Anto and one Deco who are all from Galway. I don't know any Chantelles though .

AnonoBoy

I slept with a girl called Jacinta once.

qvsr46ofgc792k

bull**** story if ever i heard one! You should write for fair city!

Jay P

Paris Embarrassed Radiance wrote: »

bull**** story if ever i heard one! You should write for fair city!

Who cares if it's real or not? It's funny!

qvsr46ofgc792k

you think thats funny..well you should watch fair city!

arybvtcw0eolkf

Paris Embarrassed Radiance wrote: »

bull**** story if ever i heard one! You should write for fair city!

+1.

I don't think too many of us believed it, but it was worth a snigger all the same.

Keano

Paris Embarrassed Radiance wrote: »

bull**** story if ever i heard one! You should write for fair city!

Maybe he does and its a cunning plan to see what people think of the story!

mawk

i work with a jacinta. She seems nice. But i figure she'd steak of ya if she felt inclined.

Tends to look really angry even when being nice

AckwelFoley

I can imagine the honeymoon.

They go into their travel agent and request a suitable foreign holiday..

"How about a romantic shoplifting honeymoon in Bray?"

Blazer

angerfist2009 wrote: »

God if there where no ''Scumbags'' around what would half of ya s talk bout on here ?

it's Dublin...there's about a million of the fúckers there

Trekker09

" I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta".

"Fook off, never touched the scabied b***h"

"I saw yez"

"Fook off. Wha woz I wearin then?"

"Didas tracky, yer Argos chain and ya had yer Reeboks on"

"Fook off, that could've been Anto, Deco or Shaymo ya stuuupid fookin b***h"

I love OP.

rossie1977

Dancor wrote: »

Curious question, but does anyone actually know anybody by the name of ''Jacinta''?

Ive come accross my fair share of scobes in life and never met anyone by that name.

there is a girl in my hometown called jacinta, she was even in college with me

dylano_k

bullets wrote: »

When the third matrix film was on in the cinema had a knacker couple sit
in the seat directly in front of me (even though there were plenty of others)

The decided to wear the face off each other and more! they had their hand
jammed down each other's crotches where she was giving yer man a tug job,
and he looked like he was trying to start a fire with the friction of his hands on her bush. She Finished him off, before cleaning her hands by flicking her fingers, he proceeded to open a bottle of coke and smell his own fingers,
and yer wan looked up and said rather loudly Oi! that's Keano Reeves! before
leaving the cinema. Yer man give's me dagger eyes as if to say what your problem!

I got two shows for the price of one! :eek:

~B

Did you not learn your lesson after seeing matrix 2??

and tbh...you have to smell your fingers

Hank_Jones

redout wrote: »

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

Thanks for the story, just pissed myself laughing in a computer room full of strangers.

Only in Dublin...

dylano_k

He should sang...

You and me could have scumbag romance,
whhooooaaa

Or...

rossie1977

Hank_Jones wrote: »

Thanks for the story, just pissed myself laughing in a computer room full of strangers.

Only in Dublin...

never been to athlone i see

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oZTW30fAQY

j1974

redout wrote: »

In town tonight walking along the quays outside the old Virgin megastore drinking a bottle of water and I saw two young scumbags wearing the face off one an other as I approached. Nothing wrong with that in itself. The bloke was wearing the classic adidas 3 stripe tracksuit with matching baseball cap at about 45 degrees and the young wan in nike tracksuit bottoms and matching hoodie.

Just as I got to them the bloke stopped kissing her and said in a typical scumbag tone "Do ya wanna get engaged flower". I immediately spat out my water and began pissing myself laughing. Maybe you had to be there but it was pure comical. Then it got even better when the young wan answered " I'm not marrying you, you were riding Jacinta". At that point two Dublin bus drivers presumably on a break standing nearby started pissing themselves also. The scumbag then started on the bus drivers with his "fiance" having to try pull him away. All in all it was better than a night at the improv. I love Dublin

classic!!! you wouldn't read that in a roddy doyle book. :P

RobbieTheRobber

rossie1977 wrote: »

never been to athlone i see

That video cracks me up.

"why do you ride hippos"
"Why do you ride fat women that look like men"

"because I'll ride anything I can get, does that answer your question"

:D

Loves it I do, I forgot about that video