Crossdressing again...

e04bf099

Pisslips and Spastafarian, do you hate his wife? Do you hate women and think they should be taught what the correct emotions are. Obviously discomfort is the wrong emotional reaction to a husbands cross-dressing. Surely if people don't know how to be reasonable and rational they should be forced. "We will force you to be free" as Robespierre might proclaim.

I would hope that there is more depth to the relationship of a married couple than to be so willing to break up over something so small.

He should not stay in a marriage if it completely restricts his ability to express himself the way he wants to. But if he can save the marriage and do both then so be it.

Your point, Pisslips, is that if she divorces him it is her fault for not loving him enough to get past the "small" matter of him wearing women's clothes. Conversely, over the same, suddenly much more important issue of him wearing women's clothes, he should divorce her in triumph and freedom from tyranny, prejudice and ignorance. In which case the condemnation so firmly laid at her door, just two breaths past, of not being loving enough, has strangely no relevance.

Your real reason for saying this is obvious. That reason is, of course, that it is HIS life, not hers, and HIS marraige, not hers, and HIS clothes, not...

He has not been deceitfull, he told her before

Despite the deceit, although we all decieve and hide our shame, his first priority is still himself.

You don't care about her at all! That is why you can't possibly add anything helpful here. You can't give any legitimate advice. You are a ignorant to the point of negligence. You don't think she is important but guess what Pisslips... OP DOES!!!

This is a relationship issues. He could very easilly have put this thread in with the personal issues if he'd wanted to. But he didn't, because despite his deceit, he cares for and loves his wife and wants to reconcile his fetish with his female.

This isn't a game. This isn't a competition to see who can get the OP to do what they want him to do. Don't start messing with people's narrative reason if you're not gonna reason anything through yourself.

Spastafarian, you haven't even the faintest idea what you're talking about. I can't believe I have to explain these things to another retard. If he was comfortable wearing womens clothes in public or had a comfortable place to do it then that would be fine, he wouldn't need councelling. As I have said a thousand times, it is my opinion that there is nothing wrong with men wearing womens clothes.

Unfortunately, because you're a retard and didn't read the thread, you didn't quite grasp the fact that the OP is deeply ashamed of wanting to wear womens clothes. He also can't speak to his wife about it, for two reasons. 1) He can only speak of it in an erratic compulsive manner & 2) his wife shuts down because she isn't comfortable with it.

That said, the best way for him to understand what he is doing, in order to help him speak about it with his wife is to go to councelling.

I know I sound like a demented bat with how intense I'm getting about this. But f&%k-it:cool:, I give good, reasoned & considered advice and I don't need to be called a retard for it.

Spastafarian, if you have any comments on what I have, please read the previous posts first. On second thoughts, don't. It would take you far too long and you probably have homework to do or something.

Taltos

OP,

I have read and re-read some of the above posts - hope you are still here.

I am going to try to keep this simple.
Try to talk to your wife again, keep re-assuring her that you love her. Also explain that while you thought you had this under control when the stress levels build it is an instant release for you and under no circumstances does it change how you feel about her.
Also apologise profusely for not being totally open with her. I think most people can understand that fear is a great motivator. Fear of rejection. Fear of her leaving you.
Finally - if she does have an issue with you doing this in your home - who knows maybe she just cannot handle it. Suggest then that when the pressure does build to this level that you will book yourself into a cheap hotel. Or alternatively offer a trade-off - after each time you feel the urge you treat her to something she really wants.

Obsessions can be funny things - by denying yourself this outlet you are instead causing internal pressures to build. This is not good for you, your relationships or your health. Don't wait so long, try to find a compromise, no matter how small. But pressure / stress is a killer.

Silverfish

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Thank you.

pisslips

e04bf099 wrote: »

Your point, Pisslips, is that if she divorces him it is her fault for not loving him enough to get past the "small" matter of him wearing women's clothes. Conversely, over the same, suddenly much more important issue of him wearing women's clothes, he should divorce her in triumph and freedom from tyranny, prejudice and ignorance. In which case the condemnation so firmly laid at her door, just two breaths past, of not being loving enough, has strangely no relevance.

THe point I am making is that while this cross-dressing has a major impact on his life and is clearly important to him and his future happiness, he must accept it and include it as part of his life, so he can move on and be a contructive member of society.
My related point is, that if she loves him, she should be willing to see this. He will not be able to live a happy productive life, if he doesn't face and incorporate these new facets of his character.He did not choose to have these urges or desires any more than she chose for him to have them. He is not selfishly or purposely hurting her.

Ideally they both need to compromise but she is not compromising one bit, she won't even discuss it. She's obviously in denial that it's even happening. But it is and it exists and he has to do it. If he doesn't cross dress or find another outlet, then their relationship will be ruined for sure.

Your real reason for saying this is obvious. That reason is, of course, that it is HIS life, not hers, and HIS marraige, not hers, and HIS clothes, not...

You don't care about her at all! That is why you can't possibly add anything helpful here

You don't care about him at all. This is his relationship issue, isn't it?
Or is it yours?

Anyway, this doesn't help the OP, so I'm sorry. I won't speculate on e04bf099's motive. I wasn't even refering to other posters before this. In fact, you can ignore everything I said if you want, the truth is I don't care, thats why it's a usefull impartial opinion.