What do you read on the toilet?

giftgrub

If i'm at home its a book, right now i'm cr***ing my way through The Silver Swan by Benjamin Black

But in work i tend to print stuff out from the papers or sutes like Slate or Salon

We get newspapers where i work, somepeople bring them in when theyre going for a sit down, i think thats disgusting....

If I'm stuck i'll read a shampoo bottle, or look up something on my phone

Any thoughts on crapper reading material?

cuppa

reading this.

Captain Havoc

4-4-2 or a book ("In search of Robert Millar" at the mo)

okioffice84

Shampoo bottles

WIZE

I normally read the back of Shampoo bottles or Shaving cream or what ever I can find . Shower gel is quite interesting

messrs

magazine or play my DS :eek:

Sea Sharp

The bible. It can also be used for toilet paper.
(Stephen busting tip)

Bumble32

Surf the web:D

Long Onion

I arrange the hair on my thighs into a neat French plait.

Prof.Badass

I only shit when i need to. I never understood this thing of sitting on the toilet for 5 minutes, aren't there better things you could be doing with your time .

Theta

vinylmesh wrote: »

I only shit when i need to. I never understood this thing of sitting on the toilet for 5 minutes .

Yeah same, out in 2 mins.

civis_liberalis

I don't read on the toilet. I find it a weird thing to do.

AnonoBoy

vinylmesh wrote: »

I only shit when i need to. I never understood this thing of sitting on the toilet for 5 minutes, aren't there better things you could be doing with your time .

5 minutes? You've got to be kidding me lad.

A good 10 every morning is the only healthy option.

petes

Whatever comes to hand. Be it soap or toothpaste. I don't purposely bring something to read when I go to the bog!

Captain Havoc

vinylmesh wrote: »

I only shit when i need to. I never understood this thing of sitting on the toilet for 5 minutes, aren't there better things you could be doing with your time .

Like what? Sometimes I even stay on the jacks to finish the page, article or chapter I'm reading.

orourkeda

I usually read the toilet paper after i'm done. God only knows what you'd find on that.

orourkeda

giftgrub wrote: »

If i'm at home its a book, right now i'm cr***ing my way through The Silver Swan by Benjamin Black

But in work i tend to print stuff out from the papers or sutes like Slate or Salon

We get newspapers where i work, somepeople bring them in when theyre going for a sit down, i think thats disgusting....

If I'm stuck i'll read a shampoo bottle, or look up something on my phone

Any thoughts on crapper reading material?

Was this your attempt at a pun?

Aidric

101 Greatest Dumps.

NothingMan

I usually play word warp on my iPhone, or check facebook.
I always hate sitting down for a constitutional and realising my iPhone is downstairs. I've already read every bottle of product in the bathroom.

Although I used to have a book called the Big Toilet reader, it had thousands of articles of all different lengths for the amount of time you'll be in there. Learned lots of random stuff from that one.

demag

Boards.ie on the phone. Can be in there for ages if I find a good thread.

FlutterinBantam

Wouldn't read much, just clean out the bell butter off me todger with whatever toothbrush is handy.

Lux23

Nothing. I would never be in there that long, the idea of people reading in the bog appalls me.

cornbb

iPhone - it'll change the way you sh*t forever. They don't say it in the ads but every iPhone owner will tell you this.

Diabhal Beag

It takes me 2 minutes to **** at most. That's not long enough to read anything

Archeron

Homer Simpsons book of wisdom. Read it hundreds of times, but its good jax material.

phasers

I keep several books and magazines in the crapper which I update weekly.


It's a little thing called hospitality, look it up some time you guys

Bobeagleburger

I just look at pictures

rainbowdrop

I tend to read 'Viz' magazine whilst on the bowl. Love the 'Reader's Top Tips' section. My favourite include -

- Increase blind people's electricity bills, by turning on all their lights when their guide dogs are not looking!

- Motorists! I find that pressing the break pedal when approaching a bend helps to slow your vehicle down.

Or my favourite tip EVER:

- Parents! Child choking to death on an ice cube? DON'T PANIC! Simply pour a jug of boiling water down it's throat, and the blockage
will be dislodged immediately.

:D

Don't know about Viz helping me to s***, but I would certainly be p***ing myself whilst reading it!!

Agricola

Its hard to sh!te, fap and read all at once. Somethins gotta give and its usually reading

BrokenArrows

how long do you people spend on the toilet ffs.

Im never in there long enough to have time to read anything. I only go to the toilet when there is an immanent chance of crapping myself. So once my cheeks hit the seat there is no waiting around. haha.

phlegms

How can you multi-task like that?!?
If I do both at once my head will melt...