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Your most embarrasing drunken story?

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2

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    #32
    wudangclan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,883 ✭✭✭wudangclan


    Fringe wrote: »
    I was getting sick out of a window and my friend was helping me. I then accidentally farted in his face.

    possible freudian slip?


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    #33
    Sir Gallagher
    Registered Users Posts: 6,836 ✭✭✭Sir Gallagher


    I had a piss out of my window into my back garden one night when i was too drunk to go to the bathroom, woke up the next morning and realised i had pissed on all the clothes on the washing up line.


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    #34
    Testament1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,580 ✭✭✭Testament1


    gettin sick in the kitchen then topping it off by goin for a piss in the corner of the kitchen afterwards


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    #35
    minidazzler
    Registered Users Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    FearDark wrote: »
    Details on this.

    The other is a glass eye, it comes out alot at inopertune moments!!!! I was drunk and stupid. Luckily I did not have sex with her, I think now all the women of boards will think alot differently of me. I didn't expect so many thanks for that post:o


    I saw some of our mutual friends on the bus today and they didn't say anything except "Hi Mini, haven't seen you since "B's" Bday, what time did you go home." While one laughed the other, a good friend of mine gave me the evil eye:(

    It's OK Now though because I have sworn off scoring girls when I am drunk. Not going off with another girl until I am sober while doing so. I hated myself severely after my episode with the Glass eyed Pirate.

    She is a nice girl, just not attractive in anyway!!


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    #36
    Nichololas
    Registered Users Posts: 1,186 ✭✭✭Nichololas


    Came home one night and got into bed. Head starting spinning one way and everything in the room spun the other. Realised I wasn't going to make it to the bathroom in time to puke and my only options were to lie there and puke on my own face or stagger across to the window. I eventually managed to reach the window where I evacuated everything I had drunk the previous few hours, including beer, whisky, red wine.. Woke up feeling pretty good until I went outside and saw a giant red stain from my (2nd floor) window down to the ground at the front of the house. It looked like I'd decapitated a would-be burglar with my window. :(


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    #37
    Daragh101
    Closed Accounts Posts: 585 ✭✭✭Daragh101


    Enlil_Nick wrote: »
    Came home one night and got into bed. Head starting spinning one way and everything in the room spun the other. Realised I wasn't going to make it to the bathroom in time to puke and my only options were to lie there and puke on my own face or stagger across to the window. I eventually managed to reach the window where I evacuated everything I had drunk the previous few hours, including beer, whisky, red wine.. Woke up feeling pretty good until I went outside and saw a giant red stain from my (2nd floor) window down to the ground at the front of the house. It looked like I'd decapitated a would-be burglar with my window. :(


    that happened b4 to me but, my dad came into the room in the process, also i was only 17:o:P


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    #38
    powerzjim
    Closed Accounts Posts: 153 ✭✭powerzjim


    iv pissed on my friends leg


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    #39
    Randy Shafter
    Registered Users Posts: 345 ✭✭Randy Shafter


    Back in February i went to a gig in The Village and was drinking alot of havana clubs and cokes in fairly quick succession. Cue the end of the night in the taxi and puking into my lap... Pay the soilage fee and stumble into the house. Get to my room start to take off my clothes and have to run to the loo to puke. At this stage im only in my socks and i puke all over the bathroom floor. My parents wake up to see their son in his fleshy glory and putting his foot into the fresh warm puke on said floor. Then i forgot to take my phone out of my trousers pocket and it got washed...

    It was an expensive night to say the least and i got an earfull from the gf the next day for not texting her that i got home safe and sound.

    Oh, i recently put on the jacket i wore that night to find it had a nice layer of dry puke on it.... Lovely.:o


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    #40
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    minidazzler wrote: »
    She is a nice girl, just not attractive in anyway!!

    How was her box though?


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    #41
    AlmightyCushion
    Moderators, Education Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 35,059 Mod ✭✭✭✭AlmightyCushion


    Oh another one. Being woken up by my mum while sleeping on the toilet. Luckily I wasn't actually going to the toilet and just needed a sit down.


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    #42
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    AlmightyCushion wrote: »
    Oh another one. Being woken up by my mum while sleeping on the toilet. Luckily I wasn't actually going to the toilet and just needed a sit down.

    Could be worse, my father caught me having a **** on my window sill, arse cocked out the window and all...


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    #43
    Daragh101
    Closed Accounts Posts: 585 ✭✭✭Daragh101


    FearDark wrote: »
    Could be worse, my father caught me having a **** on my window sill, arse cocked out the window and all...


    begs the question.."what was wrong with the toilet"?


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    #44
    lycopodium123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 72 ✭✭lycopodium123


    DarkJager wrote: »
    I woz drunk once in Amsterdam, and I went to dip the lolly in the candy shop if ya get the drift. Too many pints of course, so I was like a ****in rabbit with no dick tryna horse it in. She said to me "Ya know you only have 2o minutes?" and I was all like "Ya ho, I know that **** 4 real, 2o mins all I need to make you scream ho". So anyway, therre I was doin some serious Ron Jeremy **** behind the closed door when there was ;ike a knock or some **** on the door. I said to the ho "yo who the **** is dat??!!" and she get all up in my face like "that my hustla fooollll". So i got my clothes and ****, made sure my paper was still stackin up in the wallet and I got my mother****in stroll on, walkin out da door like it wasn't ****. Its only when this old granny lady ho started staring at me in da street that I realised like my almighty cock was on show for the whole RLD. Gave it a little wave and all for the nosey beeatches...


    what? can you re-do this in english please>


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    #45
    dellas1979
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭dellas1979


    minidazzler wrote: »

    While one laughed the other, a good friend of mine gave me the evil eye

    Ahahahahahaha her eye, his eye ahahha what in the feck is up with you and eyeballs.


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    #46
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    Daragh101 wrote: »
    begs the question.."what was wrong with the toilet"?

    This is the "I was drunk" thread not the excuses thread.


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    #47
    minidazzler
    Registered Users Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    dellas1979 wrote: »
    Ahahahahahaha her eye, his eye ahahha what in the feck is up with you and eyeballs.

    Her eye actually. And I didn't mean that pun at all:(


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    #48
    Local-womanizer
    Registered Users Posts: 3,798 ✭✭✭Local-womanizer


    FearDark wrote: »
    This is the "I was drunk" thread not the excuses thread.

    Exactly!Many a nights I've p1ssed out the window!


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    #49
    minidazzler
    Registered Users Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    How was her box though?

    Average at best. Wouldn't go back really.


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    #50
    G_R
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 5,026 Mod ✭✭✭✭G_R


    hmmm...

    well i was coming back from a wedding with two of my mates at around three in the morning. From what i'm told, i was dosing in and out of consiousness, then all of a sudden i puked all over the back of the passenger seat and myself, then fell asleep, sitting there in my own puke.

    still haven't lived it down:(


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    #51
    dellas1979
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭dellas1979


    Ahahaha Im sorry mini you are too funny *wink wink*


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    #52
    martinr5232
    Registered Users Posts: 2,298 ✭✭✭martinr5232


    minidazzler wrote: »
    I was at a friends 21st 2 months back and I was pissed.

    Long story short I ended up going down on her friend at 6 am on a public laneway that is used alot in the early morning. Her friend has one eye and is ginger. I regret it majorly because the next day I told a friend so now EVERYONE knows about it, and the girl I went down on is not attractive at all.


    Was this her ?

    leela.jpg


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    #53
    G_R
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 5,026 Mod ✭✭✭✭G_R


    martinr5232 wrote: »
    Was this her ?

    leela.jpg

    leela's not a ginger!!


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    #54
    Professey Chin
    Registered Users Posts: 51,054 ✭✭✭✭Professey Chin


    martinr5232 wrote: »
    Was this her ?

    leela.jpg
    Id do leela.....wait shes a drawing.Ooooooo papercuts :(

    Totally worth it :cool:


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    #55
    minidazzler
    Registered Users Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭minidazzler


    dannym08 wrote: »
    leela's not a ginger!!

    And she's hot!!!:D


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    #56
    Notorious
    Registered Users Posts: 2,167 ✭✭✭Notorious


    I think the worst I've got happened after myself and a mate got off work early. We hit the local public house, and drank for about five hours while waiting for the rest of the gang to finish. Not long after our colleagues had joined us, me, being in bits attempted to have a smoke; I had the end you light in my mouth and was trying to light the filter. After an argument with a sober mate about said cigarette, I dragged him out of the closet to about twenty people who had absolutely no idea he was in there. Fun times.


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    #57
    ch750536
    Registered Users Posts: 3,736 ✭✭✭ch750536


    Was turning up to the Donnington rock festival many moons ago. Turns out they had banned glass bottles this year, fine the year before.

    Anyway, I necked a litre of Vodka straight.

    I remember the first act coming on, would be about 2pm.
    I woke after the last act, where my friend told me what had happened.

    1. Tried to start a fight with everyone, telling people I had 'spider DNA'.
    2. Shat on the floor next to a woman who then beat me.
    3. Swallowed a wasp that stung me in the mouth.
    4. Passed out.

    At this point my friend had to stand watch over me for 8 hours, occasionally checking I was breathing. He stopped people from stealing my clothes.

    Oddly, the second I awoke I was completely sober. It was a long walk back to the car, when we got there I had to ride home naked in the back as all my piss, **** & puke stained clothes were bagged up.

    We had a gas.


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    #58
    Professey Chin
    Registered Users Posts: 51,054 ✭✭✭✭Professey Chin


    Notorious wrote: »
    I think the worst I've got happened after myself and a mate got off work early. We hit the local public house, and drank for about five hours while waiting for the rest of the gang to finish. Not long after our colleagues had joined us, me, being in bits attempted to have a smoke; I had the end you light in my mouth and was trying to light the filter. After an argument with a sober mate about said cigarette, I dragged him out of the closet to about twenty people who had absolutely no idea he was in there. Fun times.
    What kinda stupid pub has closets for people to hide in?..............


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    #59
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    ch750536 wrote: »

    1. Tried to start a fight with everyone, telling people I had 'spider DNA'.
    2. Shat on the floor next to a woman who then beat me.
    3. Swallowed a wasp that stung me in the mouth.
    4. Passed out.

    We should meet up for a few pints lol.


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    #60
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,221 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    Ultimate Chin wrote: »
    What kinda stupid pub has closets for people to hide in?..............

    Not "The George" ;)


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    #61
    smk89
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,163 ✭✭✭smk89


    the very first night i drank (late starter at 18) i got concussion from having a vodka bottle smashed over my head. i normally wouldn't mind but i had my a levels the next week and me brain dont work since then.

    Next night i went out drinking my drink was spiked (with speed) by my best friend and i ended up projectile vomiting and having an exitential crisis (or so im told). with friends like that...


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