AH is crap tonight, but its getting better! NSFW Post#50 - Disgusting stuff!

FearDark

Normally you lot keep me entertained, not tonight, I wished MyNameIsUrl happy birthday an hour a go and since then nothing.

When did AH people start responding to "J1 Visa closing date?" threads and Zombie threads!?

Someone, do somthing interesting.

brummytom

Everyone's in bed for school tomorrow

My name is URL

There's a severe lack of sharpies and poopers alright

It's monday !

Overheal

its because im not off work yet.

FearDark

I suggest brummytom tells a story, theyre always good for a giggle...

Can a mod just ban someone for no reason and we'll all just wait in the help desk and wait for the carnage?

Alternatively can somebody just ring me and entertain me??

bbbBooooored :mad:

Sharpshooter

My name is URL wrote: »

There's a severe lack of sharpies and poopers alright

I'm here.

/watching..:pac:
/wishing I could play....

galwayrush

I apologise , i'm sober.:o

K4t

I blame the mod crackdown on 'Yore Ma' replies.

AlmightyCushion

Just do what I do and play mafia wars on facebook.

FearDark

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Just do what I do and play mafia wars on facebook.

Its all happening on farmville...

Latchy

I'm watching '' 20 minutes that changed America '' on C4 ( 9/11 ) ...adverts are on now ......just so you know

galwayrush

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Just do what I do and play mafia wars on facebook.

I must try that, seems most people on my list are playing it.

AlmightyCushion

FearDark wrote: »

Its all happening on farmville...

Yeah I'm playing that as well but it's not as good as mafia wars.

FearDark

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Yeah I'm playing that as well but it's not as good as mafia wars.

Its your lucky day, I need one more neighbour to photograph their farm...

MagicMarker

I'm masturbating.

brummytom

FearDark wrote: »

I suggest brummytom tells a story, theyre always good for a giggle...

I can tell you the story of my mom trying to ask if I was a gay; or the story of me ejaculating onto my own face.

And no, those two things are not linked

Latchy wrote: »

I'm watching '' 20 minutes that changed America '' on C4 ( 9/11 ) ...adverts are on now ......just so you know

Snap

AlmightyCushion

You can add me if you like. Link is in my sig. You better gift me something good though.

Tar.Aldarion

You should double your efforts with one of your hobbies. I suggest ****.

jumpguy

Go and get a life you internet hippies!

FearDark

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

You can add me if you like. Link is in my sig. You better gift me something good though.

Ill do it in a min, sweet.

Nothing worse than gifting your mate a horse only to recieve a cherry tree in return!

35notout

FearDark wrote: »

Normally you lot keep me entertained, not tonight, I wished MyNameIsUrl happy birthday an hour a go and since then nothing.

When did AH people start responding to "J1 Visa closing date?" threads and Zombie threads!?

Someone, do somthing interesting.

Well I'm flashing you guys and flicking the bean.....interests me

Iang87

brummytom wrote: »

I can tell you the story of my mom trying to ask if I was a gay; or the story of me ejaculating onto my own face.

And no, those two things are not linked

i'm intrigued to hear the gay story, anyone who claims they haven't ejaculated on there own face is a liar

AlmightyCushion

FearDark wrote: »

Ill do it in a min, sweet.

Nothing worse than gifting your mate a horse only to recieve a cherry tree in return!

Actually, if you want, sent me a cherry tree. I need one.

FearDark

brummytom wrote: »

I can tell you the story of my mom trying to ask if I was a gay; or the story of me ejaculating onto my own face.

And no, those two things are not linked



Snap

The story with your ma... anythin to do with your ma is hawt!

magicianz

FearDark wrote: »

Alternatively can somebody just ring me and entertain me??

bbbBooooored :mad:

ASL?




:pac:

phasers

I'm watching Shameless, make your own entertainment damnit

Kiera

FearDark wrote: »

Normally you lot keep me entertained, not tonight, I wished MyNameIsUrl happy birthday an hour a go and since then nothing.

When did AH people start responding to "J1 Visa closing date?" threads and Zombie threads!?

Someone, do somthing interesting.

Its all going down on msn right now. You're missing it :P

We'll be back after the phasers strip-show.

FearDark

magicianz wrote: »

ASL?




:pac:

16/f/Cali

Latchy

phasers wrote: »

I'm watching Shameless, make your own entertainment damnit

Ok so , i have edited below

Iang87 wrote: »

i'm intrigued to hear the story, anyone who claims they haven't ejaculated on somebody elses face is a liar

That's entertainment .....anttttttttttttttttttt

phasers

Kiera wrote: »

Its all going down on msn right now. You're missing it :P

We'll be back after the phasers strip-show.

I decided to perform through the medium of interpretive dance tonight

FearDark

phasers wrote: »

I decided to perform through the medium of interpretive dance tonight

Phasers is a girl?? :P

Kiera

FearDark wrote: »

Phasers is a girl?? :P

Is he fúck. He's a hot piece of manly ass!

brummytom

FearDark wrote: »

The story with your ma... anythin to do with your ma is hawt!

It's neither funny nor interesting, I just had it in my head; but you asked :P

Well we were on holiday up in Scotland last summer. The olympics were on at the time so I sat down to watch that; my mom stayed in the caravan while my dad and brothers went out somewhere.
I think it was the gymnastics on or something, not quite sure.

Out of nowhere, mom turns to me.
"Tom, you got a girlfriend?" she says
"No! (In a sort of 'Look at me, I'm a moose.. how could I?!' way, but in hindsight, I think she thought it was 'Girl? eurghh' way).

Then she says "Well have you got a boyfriend? You know I wouldn't mind don't you, you can tell me anything". :eek:

"NO!" I protested.
She answers "Oh ok then.. if you ever want to talk to me, I'm your mother, i'll love you regardless"
I reiterated, "Mom, I'm not!!"

Now all the time she''ll go, "look at that girl, Isn't she pretty?"
or "Isn't he handsome?"


I'm not giving her any clues. If she wants to think I'm a fairy, then so be it.

I need a tutu

phasers

FearDark wrote: »

Phasers is a girl?? :P

How dare you!

I'm the manliest man going, surpassed only by Frada

magicianz

Ahh well im 16/f/cork and my name is crystal =\

galwayrush

MagicMarker wrote: »

I'm masturbating.

I think the OP is looking for something that will keep him entertained more than 15 seconds.

Latchy

FearDark wrote: »

Phasers is a girl?? :P

She is ? it can be really hard to tell who is and who isin't at times .

Usernames are not the best of guides

FearDark

brummytom wrote: »

It's neither funny nor interesting, I just had it in my head; but you asked :P

Well we were on holiday up in Scotland last summer. The olympics were on at the time so I sat down to watch that; my mom stayed in the caravan while my dad and brothers went out somewhere.
I think it was the gymnastics on or something, not quite sure.

Out of nowhere, mom turns to me.
"Tom, you got a girlfriend?" she says
"No! (In a sort of 'Look at me, I'm a moose.. how could I?!' way, but in hindsight, I think she thought it was 'Girl? eurghh' way).

Then she says "Well have you got a boyfriend? You know I wouldn't mind don't you, you can tell me anything". :eek:

"NO!" I protested.
She answers "Oh ok then.. if you ever want to talk to me, I'm your mother, i'll love you regardless"
I reiterated, "Mom, I'm not!!"

Now all the time she''ll go, "look at that girl, Isn't she pretty?"
or "Isn't he handsome?"


I'm not giving her any clues. If she wants to think I'm a fairy, then so be it.

I need a tutu

Ok, that was good but I cant help thinking I chose the wrong story to tell, tell us the one where you cum in your face :P

Lol... your poor mother, sure next time your watching porn just leave your bedroom door open and turn the volume up on your computer!

Rabies

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Just do what I do and play mafia wars on facebook.

FearDark wrote: »

Its all happening on farmville...

I'm on both too. Mafia wars becomes a bit of a pain later on. loads of back tracking

Tar.Aldarion

I did everything there was in mafia wars, then I just found a bug and went to level 1400-1500 before I got banned for exploiting it. :pac:

4zn76tysfajdxp

phasers wrote: »

How dare you!

I'm the manliest man going, surpassed only by Frada

I'm so manly, I started the rumour that phasers is a girl to further accentuate my manliness in comparison to...him.

That's not an example of insecurity in my masculinity, but a display of good old fashioned hairy-sacked competitiveness.

MizzLolly

Tar.Aldarion wrote: »

I suggest ****.

That's no way for a lady to talk.! :eek:

mehfesto2

I could tell yiz a story.
But it'd only gget me banned.
It's true and it involves a biro

Tar.Aldarion

MizzLolly wrote: »

That's no way for a lady to talk.! :eek:

I apologise my lady friend, whatever overcame me.

*flutters eyelashes*

FearDark

mehfesto2 wrote: »

I could tell yiz a story.
But it'd only gget me banned.
It's true and it involves a biro

Did u put it in your bum?

mehfesto2

No.
It's hilarious, it does involve an arse though.

brummytom

Go on, tell it

FearDark

Someone post "play him off keyboard cat" because AH is crap tonight and im goin upstairs to annoy the girlfriend!

mehfesto2

Alright,

So my shy mate gets a new girlfriend. And well, she's known for being a bit loose,, but we say nothing coz even though she's a bit dirty, he's well punching above his weight here.

Anyway, we go out drinking and usually he's the quiet one, but after a few pints he opens up about his sex-life out of the blue. Pure deranged stguff. Tying this to that and upsoide-down parts and what have you. Mad stuff. Pretty sure some of it was illegal.

Anyway, in a non-chalant manner he turns to me and goes:

"bu', like, the maddest yolk was when she goes, 'd'ye wanna try it... in anoter place', an' I'm all like.... aaaaw deadly." Turns out though she's been down this road before, and knew the ropes. She tells him to start off small.

He looks at me again "an' there;'s no bleedin' way Im stickin' me finger up there, like. So I says to her, I have something for yeh." He grabbed the nearest, thinnest thing to him.

A biro.

And he injects it ...pointy end first. Oddly enough, she kinda gets into it. If you knew the girl, this wouldnt really shock you.

Unfortunately, half-way through ...*ahem*... "windmilling" her, the pen gets too hot and bursts. There's ink everywhere. "Shes an' arse like a baboon and this stage". He continues to bash away, undetered.

She gets a bit panicked at the feeling of the ink, premsuming it to be blood and starts writhing around the place, him shouting at her to sit still while he attempts to pluck the biro back. He pulls out, but to his dismay, only half the pen comes out. The rest had somehow broken in half during the task.

The plastic casing was in his hand, but the middle bit, was sticking out, making her "look like some sort of firework, or tha', y'know?"

Eventually, after "a good look", he got it all out. All the "little bits and that".

They're still together. And have moved onto weirder things.

MizzLolly

mehfesto2 wrote: »

Alright,

So my shy mate gets a new girlfriend. And well, she's known for being a bit loose,, but we say nothing coz even though she's a bit dirty, he's well punching above his weight here.

Anyway, we go out drinking and usually he's the quiet one, but after a few pints he opens up about his sex-life out of the blue. Pure deranged stguff. Tying this to that and upsoide-down parts and what have you. Mad stuff. Pretty sure some of it was illegal.

Anyway, in a non-chalant manner he turns to me and goes:

"bu', like, the maddest yolk was when she goes, 'd'ye wanna try it... in anoter place', an' I'm all like.... aaaaw deadly." Turns out though she's been down this road before, and knew the ropes. She tells him to start off small.

He looks at me again "an' there;'s no bleedin' way Im stickin' me finger up there, like. So I says to her, I have something for yeh." He grabbed the nearest, thinnest thing to him.

A biro.

And he injects it ...pointy end first. Oddly enough, she kinda gets into it. If you knew the girl, this wouldnt really shock you.

Unfortunately, half-way through ...*ahem*... "windmilling" her, the pen gets too hot and bursts. There's ink everywhere. "Shes an' arse like a baboon and this stage". He continues to bash away, undetered.

She gets a bit panicked at the feeling of the ink, premsuming it to be blood and starts writhing around the place, him shouting at her to sit still while he attempts to pluck the biro back. He pulls out, but to his dismay, only half the pen comes out. The rest had somehow broken in half during the task.

The plastic casing was in his hand, but the middle bit, was sticking out, making her "look like some sort of firework, or tha', y'know?"

Eventually, after "a good look", he got it all out. All the "little bits and that".

They're still together. And have moved onto weirder things.

...holy f*ck :eek: