Was I an idiot?

abouttobebanned

I was in the bookies today....actually I was in about 4...basically registering in all of their free comps for the soccer season ahead. They know me in all of them cause a few years ago I frequented them one too many times. Anyway, while I was picking out my players for a comp in one shop my attention was taken by a conversation that was starting beside me.

It transpired that the father was supposed to meet his 13-14 year old daughter at 3pm but she was 45 minutes late...in that time, while waiting around, the father - probably trying to win more more to do something nice with the daughter - lost all his money. She was giving out to him saying she was well used to being let down by him etc...

He told her that he had his last tenner on a horse that was about to run - Captain McGarry, intrigued by this I stayed to watch the race, and the horse get beaten by a head. The feeling of having that last roll of the dice throwing up the wrong numbers was one I knew too well. He left with his daughter...I followed him out and called him over pretending I knew him, and then gave him €50 without the daughter seeing.

This is something that I know will provoke revulsion in most people as there are a lot more people out there who'd need the money more. I dunno...I guess I can't explain it.

phasers

Yeah

My name is URL

No, that was quite a nice thing to do

maybe he'll be touched by it and take heed not to do the same again

Michellenman

Yes.

abouttobebanned

phasers wrote: »

Yeah

Sorry I didn't provide some pictures with that post dude. Next time though, when you're covering up your inability to read, it's probably best that you wait a couple of minutes before posting.

€1 to daughter, €49 to more bets

phasers

abouttobebanned wrote: »

Sorry I didn't provide some pictures with that post dude. Next time though, when you're covering up your inability to read, it's probably best that you wait a couple of minutes before posting.

What?

abouttobebanned

bluewolf wrote: »

€1 to daughter, €49 to more bets

My thinking was that he wouldn't come back in cause she was with him. Naive im sure

philologos

Genuine compassion there OP, well done.

Saibh

Nice thing to do, but wondering what did he do with the €50. Did he go into another bookies and waste the money, hope he didn't.

lucky-colm

what odds did you get on him going back into the bookies

abouttobebanned

phasers wrote: »

What?

I'll throw out an apology to ya mate if you admit that you're just a lightening fast reader...oh wait...while I was putting the poll together you could see the thread couldn't you? Ah...ok, here's that apology I owe ya. xxx

donmeister

€50 says that didn't happen

abouttobebanned

donmeister wrote: »

€50 says that didn't happen

:pac: I assure you it did sir. I actually hope that the daughter is not a boards user.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

There is, unfortunately, the chance that he will lose a bit of that money, but hopefully he had some sense and used it to take his daughter to do something nice. Whatever it went towards, I think it was a nice gesture, and fair play to you!!

Fajitas!

I don't think you're an idiot at all - It was a nice thing to do, I just hope yer man appreciates it, and does something nice with the daughter. And keeps clear of the bookies with it.

Fair dues.

Mayoegian

What a lovely, selfless, kind, just lovely thing to do!!:)

Maith an buachaill!

Wertz

Fair play to you OP.
That was a very selfless thing you did...but being a gambler yourself you know that you haven't really helped the father (I know you did it for the daughter moreso) and realistically the only way he can learn a lesson (and move towards stopping) is to be saddled with that overwhelming guilt that only loosing everything can provide.
Highly unlikely you'll see your 50...I don't know if that's important to you, probably not.

WindSock

That was a nice thing to do. Did he say to her he had no money left? She might be wondering where the cash appeared from. What did he say to you?

I'm sure he won't forget it anyway. At least you tried, he gets to spend a day with his daughter with less restiction than before, you never know, it might have been a wake up call for him.

TheZohanS

You should have given the €50 to the daughter.

Fizman

Should have just given her the 50. She could have bought a new dad online.

AckwelFoley

It was a nice thought, however it teaches the bollox nothing.

You should have given the daughter the money to buy a watch

abouttobebanned

Just thinking of it now...i spoke some shiiite to him when I was pretending I knew him to give him the money...he just stood there saying "I don't understand"...I can't blame him. I dunno...I guess in my head I was thinking he could go back to the daughter, then along the way say oh I forgot about the 50 i put away or something. Or he could just say I was paying back money i owed to him. Giving the money straight to the daughter would have just been rubbing his nose in it i think

Gambling really is a horrible game though the face of the daughter really stuck with me.

wudangclan

well done op.
nice spontaneous gesture of humanity.
the world needs more like you.

Wertz

abouttobebanned wrote: »

Gambling really is a horrible game though the face of the daughter really stuck with me.

It doesn't stick with him though and I'd be fairly confident it's not the first (nor the last) time he'll see it.
Gambling is one of those huge silent problems that festers in Ireland and creates untold damge in families.

MagicMarker

Yeah OP, fair play man.

Any more fiddy's goin?

Mayoegian

snyper wrote: »

It was a nice thought, however it teaches the bollox nothing.

You should have given the daughter the money to buy a watch

Maybe you could take a leaf out of the OP's book and be a bit more understanding. Gambling is an addiction, some people can't control it-many need help. Don't judge, especially when you don't know all the facts.

Dave!

It's a nice thing to do when you give a homeless person some money, but there's a good chance that they'll spend it on drugs, so it's probably better to give them food or something.

Perhaps you could have given him info for gamblers anonymous instead?

It was a nice gesture, but in the long (or even short) term it didn't do him any good

WindSock

How do you know she was his daughter and not some teenage prostitute? :eek:

Mayoegian

WindSock wrote: »

How do you know she was his daughter and not some teenage prostitute? :eek:

We should really have a thumbs down button on boards.ie......

The Big Red Button

Wertz wrote: »

Highly unlikely you'll see your 50...I don't know if that's important to you, probably not.

I don't think he's expecting to ever see it again!

Fair play to you OP, I can't see myself being compassionate enough to do the same in the situation. (Granted I am very very poor and can't remember the last time I saw a fifty euro note in real life.)

You'll never know whether he gambled it ten minutes later, or spent it on a nice day out with his daughter having learned his lesson; no harm in choosing to believe the latter.

If there were more people in the world like you who showed a bit of understanding and generosity, maybe less people would end up turning to drink, drugs, gambling etc.

Fizman

WindSock wrote: »

How do you know she was his daughter and not some teenage prostitute? :eek:

You just had to go there didn't you?

tut tut

anniehoo

Yep you were an idiot! Knowing his daughter disapproved he still went ahead and spent all his money. Maybe having none wouldve thought him a lesson.Gambling can be an addiction and ruin families just like any other addiction.

Hagar

OP Banned - we don't want your sort around here.













Nicely done, lad, nicely done

Kiera

Maybe try earwig less, might save you a few quid.

Random

Meh .. mixed feeling about this really...

I'm gonna go with idiot ... unless you really have €50 to be giving away and don't value money. I really don't think it was a great thing to do. He's not learning from his mistakes and the daughter is being given false impressions of her father possibly beating a gambling addition and may not help out as much?

Wertz

Mayoegian wrote: »

Maybe you could take a leaf out of the OP's book and be a bit more understanding. Gambling is an addiction, some people can't control it-many need help. Don't judge, especially when you don't know all the facts.

In fairness to snyper though, he's right, if a little blunt.

It's like giving a chronic alcoholic a cold shower, a cure for their hangover and a gift voucher for O'Brien's Off license...it gets them out of the mess temporarily, but it doesn't impart anything that the addict will learn from...how about the next time the guy goes and blows his wallet; stuck at the back of his mind now will be the time that guy gave him a nifty...and also stuck at the back of that mind will be the possibility that it might happen again.

Fizman

Having looked at your poll, it dawned on me that you could have bought too bottles of sex panther with that 50. Just thought i'd fire that out there OP. :pac:

AckwelFoley

Mayoegian wrote: »

Maybe you could take a leaf out of the OP's book and be a bit more understanding. Gambling is an addiction, some people can't control it-many need help. Don't judge, especially when you don't know all the facts.

oh i know enough about gambling and ive seen the destruction caused by it. It certainly is an addiction. Problem is with gambling is that if you are a drunk you can spend only so much before liver damage kicks in and you die.

Gambling is perhaps the worst. You could bet any amount of money you have earned or ever will earn and put it on black.

It doesnt change the fact that the father is a bollocks. He needs to cop on.

Mayoegian

Random wrote: »

Meh .. mixed feeling about this really...

I'm gonna go with idiot ... unless you really have €50 to be giving away and don't value money. I really don't think it was a great thing to do. He's not learning from his mistakes and the daughter is being given false impressions of her father possibly beating a gambling addition and may not help out as much?

Maybe a better term to use is, he values money, but values the lives and problems of others above it-hence he gave a 50 euro note to him.....

PaulieD

Thanks for the fiddy, brought herself home and headed straight back down to the bookies. Won a fortune, I post this from the Costa Del Sol. Chao!

RugbyFanatic

abouttobebanned wrote: »

I was in the bookies today....actually I was in about 4...basically registering in all of their free comps for the soccer season ahead. They know me in all of them cause a few years ago I frequented them one too many times. Anyway, while I was picking out my players for a comp in one shop my attention was taken by a conversation that was starting beside me.

It transpired that the father was supposed to meet his 13-14 year old daughter at 3pm but she was 45 minutes late...in that time, while waiting around, the father - probably trying to win more more to do something nice with the daughter - lost all his money. She was giving out to him saying she was well used to being let down by him etc...

He told her that he had his last tenner on a horse that was about to run - Captain McGarry, intrigued by this I stayed to watch the race, and the horse get beaten by a head. The feeling of having that last roll of the dice throwing up the wrong numbers was one I knew too well. He left with his daughter...I followed him out and called him over pretending I knew him, and then gave him €50 without the daughter seeing.

This is something that I know will provoke revulsion in most people as there are a lot more people out there who'd need the money more. I dunno...I guess I can't explain it.

You just fell for the oldest trick in the book pal.

waitinforatrain

I voted yes before I read the post.

Mayoegian

snyper wrote: »

oh i know enough about gambling and ive seen the destruction caused by it. It certainly is an addiction. Problem is with gambling is that if you are a drunk you can spend only so much before liver damage kicks in and you die.

Gambling is perhaps the worst. You could bet any amount of money you have earned or ever will earn and put it on black.

It doesnt change the fact that the father is a bollocks. He needs to cop on.

He's not, he's just a man with a serious, sometimes uncontrollable problem, which he can and should get help with.

Wertz

Dave! wrote: »

It's a nice thing to do when you give a homeless person some money, but there's a good chance that they'll spend it on drugs,

"But that's what I was going to spend it on"

WindSock

Mayoegian wrote: »

We should really have a thumbs down button on boards.ie......

Why? It is possible.

The Big Red Button

Wertz wrote: »

In fairness to snyper though, he's right, if a little blunt.

It's like giving a chronic alcoholic a cold shower, a cure for their hangover and a gift voucher for O'Brien's Off license...it gets them out of the mess temporarily, but it doesn't impart anything that the addict will learn from...how about the next time the guy goes and blows his wallet; stuck at the back of his mind now will be the time that guy gave him a nifty...and also stuck at the back of that mind will be the possibility that it might happen again.

But there's nothing to say that this man definitely had a chronic gambling problem. He was waiting for his daughter who was 45 minutes late, he might have decided to throw on a few euros as a once off thing, and next thing all his money was gone.

(As for her giving out to him about being used to being let down by him all the time, come on, she's a 13-14 year old girl! It's all part of the daily "I hate you/you've ruined my life/nobody understands me" rant.)

If you want to be really optimistic - and I'm just in that kind of mood right now - you could assume that he made a one-off mistake, learned his lesson hard, but thanks to the kindness of a stranger, no damage was done. But hopefully he won't do it again.

Yes I'm aware that the chances of this scenario being true are very slim, but I'll choose to believe it anyway

Mayoegian

Regardless of what the man was doing, the OP should be congratulated and praised for giving €50 of his own money to benefit someone else. It was selfless, it was generous and above all it was unbelievably considerate. So he's not an idiot, the opposite really. If there were more people like him, the World would be a great place!

TheZohanS

chatterpillar wrote: »

But there's nothing to say that this man definitely had a chronic gambling problem. He was waiting for his daughter who was 45 minutes late, he might have decided to throw on a few euros as a once off thing, and next thing all his money was gone.

Normal people wait in coffee shops or go for a walk.

Mayoegian

WindSock wrote: »

Why? It is possible.

How? Which button do I press?

AckwelFoley

Mayoegian wrote: »

He's not, he's just a man with a serious, sometimes uncontrollable problem, which he can and should get help with.

i understand where you are comming from, however, ive seen too many people.. some in my family, and close friends whos lives were destroyed by addictions, but more unfortunate is the lives of those around them that have been destroyed. Im not grouping all addictions as the same because there are some exceptions, but i look at gambling as somewhat a "voluntary addiction" ie, you are not under the influence of any drug when you walk into the bookies to throw away your weeks wages and money to feed your family and children. Ive seen it happen. Ive seen the excuses.

Until you go and get help, you are a bollox.