Sexism

Orla K

I've been thinking about this ever since the tread in after hours about the RSA ad and my other tread here about attitudes to women drivers (which ended up being locked, hopefully this one will fair better but I've a feeling it will go the same way)

I don't think there is any clear boundries on what is and isn't sexist but I do think a lot of people have a sexist mindset. For example lifting a heavy object and someone says 'that's too heavy for a woman/girl to lift' alright they are trying to spare someone strain but if there reasoning behind it is too heavy for a woman well there are female weight lifters so I think it would make more sence to just call the person in question too weak. I think it's only mildly sexist but it would still show that the mindset of women can't do X because they are X.

Also I've been looking at day to day interactions with men/women and I was wondering when it comes down to it what is really sexist and what is just slagging and I can't seem to figure out which is which.
I had to get a punture in the spare tire sorted and drove to the garage and parked outside, the guy said to pull into the garage and I said no it's only the spare tire I need to get done. He said, and I'll add this was when the other two treads were going strong, 'can you not reverse it?' I did get slightly agitated and said 'I can reverse but I'm not bothered and I've it turned off now anyway' but appartly he just didn't want to go out into the light drissle of rain and that's where all that stemed from, so I don't think that was sexist.

I'm just wondering what other people think of this, in day to day life what is sexist? I am over thinking this but I really can't help it.

MagicMarker

I don't see why you couldn't have pulled into the garage, why make him fix a puncture in the rain? I probably would have given a smart arse reply also.

Khannie

Orla K wrote: »

For example lifting a heavy object and someone says 'that's too heavy for a woman/girl to lift' alright they are trying to spare someone strain but if there reasoning behind it is too heavy for a woman well there are female weight lifters so I think it would make more sence to just call the person in question too weak. I think it's only mildly sexist but it would still show that the mindset of women can't do X because they are X.

I think that's probably because, kilo for kilo, men are stronger than women are. I don't think there's anything wrong with offering help like that.

The other day I stopped (walking) to offer a woman help whose chain had come off her bike. Did I think she was incapable of getting her chain back on? No. I thought she probably cared more about dirty hands than me though. Maybe she didn't, but my own experience with women is that they generally care more about greasy hands than the average male.*

Men and women are different in lots of ways. I don't see anything wrong with that and I don't think that acknowledging those differences means sexism.



*yes, it's a generalisation and therefore there will be plenty of exceptions

shellyboo

Orla K wrote: »

Also I've been looking at day to day interactions with men/women and I was wondering when it comes down to it what is really sexist and what is just slagging and I can't seem to figure out which is which.

Well, something can be both - someone can slag you in a sexist way. Not really sure what you're getting at with this post, tbh!

Nevyn

Orla K wrote: »

I don't think there is any clear boundries on what is and isn't sexist but I do think a lot of people have a sexist mindset. For example lifting a heavy object and someone says 'that's too heavy for a woman/girl to lift' alright they are trying to spare someone strain but if there reasoning behind it is too heavy for a woman well there are female weight lifters so I think it would make more sence to just call the person in question too weak. I think it's only mildly sexist but it would still show that the mindset of women can't do X because they are X.

Yes there are women weight lifters but they have been trained and conditioned to life things the reason why women are usually not expected to lift things over a certain weight is because you have a womb.

It is because you are a woman and it is not sexist but acknowledging that you have a womb which you may want to use some day to you know bring new life into the world and out of respect for your womb so that you don't do yourself an injury that you are not expected to lift things which are that heavy.

Yes different people have different abilties, I am pretty strong for a woman and can out lift a lot men but there is a limit to that as I respect my body and the fact I am not a man and that I have a womb.

Sorry but you are throwing the baby out with the bath water on that one.

Orla K wrote: »

Also I've been looking at day to day interactions with men/women and I was wondering when it comes down to it what is really sexist and what is just slagging and I can't seem to figure out which is which.
I had to get a punture in the spare tire sorted and drove to the garage and parked outside, the guy said to pull into the garage and I said no it's only the spare tire I need to get done. He said, and I'll add this was when the other two treads were going strong, 'can you not reverse it?' I did get slightly agitated and said 'I can reverse but I'm not bothered and I've it turned off now anyway' but appartly he just didn't want to go out into the light drissle of rain and that's where all that stemed from, so I don't think that was sexist.

Who wants to change a tire in drizzel not me, and really asking you to reverse in is not sexist and a lot of people male and female have issues reversing, you made his job harder cos you felt he was being sexist when a lot of people would have rolled their eyes at you not being able to change a tyre yourself.

Orla K wrote: »

I'm just wondering what other people think of this, in day to day life what is sexist? I am over thinking this but I really can't help it.

Yes you can over it think it and end up far to pc and making life a misery, yes men and women are different and those differences should be respected.

JC 2K3

Thaedydal wrote: »

Yes there are women weight lifters but they have been trained and conditioned to life things the reason why women are usually not expected to lift things over a certain weight is because you have a womb.

It is because you are a woman and it is not sexist but acknowledging that you have a womb which you may want to use some day to you know bring new life into the world and out of respect for your womb so that you don't do yourself an injury that you are not expected to lift things which are that heavy.

Yes different people have different abilties, I am pretty strong for a woman and can out lift a lot men but there is a limit to that as I respect my body and the fact I am not a man and that I have a womb.

Sorry but you are throwing the baby out with the bath water on that one.

Excuse my ignorance, but how can lifting damage your womb?

Nevyn

In the same way that doing press ups like a bloke does can, there are physiological difference between men and women.
Anyone who will have done a manual handling course which all employees should have done if there is any lifting in the work place even down to a full box of photocopy/printer paper will have had this explained to them.

Orla K

I will admit that I do say things in a confusing way, I really can't help it.

But to hopefully clear things up and not confuse further I will add.

I know there are differences between men and women and men are generally stronger but I still don't think the reason for not lifting something heavy should be because someone is a certain sex, it would make more sense to me to say it is because the person is weak. Anyone male or female can be weak or strong.

The car thing he wasn't changing the tyre just fixing a puncture in the spare tyre, which I was even going to carry in for him, I wasn't expecting him to walk out in the 'rain'. I wouldn't have even called it that, I stood out in it wearing a t shirt while he looked at the tyre(inside) and I wasn't even wet.

I overthink everything, and I'm far from pc. With this I just haven't come to a concluesion yet, I don't know what to make of it.

JC 2K3

Thaedydal wrote: »

In the same way that doing press ups like a bloke does can, there are physiological difference between men and women.

I'm pretty sure there was a thread in Fitness which I read that totally debunked the myth that guy push ups are bad for women. I'll try and find it....

Ah, there we go:
http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055525208

Zangetsu

Orla K wrote: »

I've been thinking about this ever since the tread in after hours about the RSA ad and my other tread here about attitudes to women drivers (which ended up being locked, hopefully this one will fair better but I've a feeling it will go the same way)

I don't think there is any clear boundries on what is and isn't sexist but I do think a lot of people have a sexist mindset. For example lifting a heavy object and someone says 'that's too heavy for a woman/girl to lift' alright they are trying to spare someone strain but if there reasoning behind it is too heavy for a woman well there are female weight lifters so I think it would make more sence to just call the person in question too weak. I think it's only mildly sexist but it would still show that the mindset of women can't do X because they are X.

Also I've been looking at day to day interactions with men/women and I was wondering when it comes down to it what is really sexist and what is just slagging and I can't seem to figure out which is which.
I had to get a punture in the spare tire sorted and drove to the garage and parked outside, the guy said to pull into the garage and I said no it's only the spare tire I need to get done. He said, and I'll add this was when the other two treads were going strong, 'can you not reverse it?' I did get slightly agitated and said 'I can reverse but I'm not bothered and I've it turned off now anyway' but appartly he just didn't want to go out into the light drissle of rain and that's where all that stemed from, so I don't think that was sexist.

I'm just wondering what other people think of this, in day to day life what is sexist? I am over thinking this but I really can't help it.

I wouldn't worry about it, you might go grey...

d'Oracle

JC 2K3 wrote: »

Excuse my ignorance, but how can lifting damage your womb?

It can't.

Its a MASSIVE misconception.
(probably a bad choice of words.)
Probably of sexist origin.

Nevyn

It can if you do it wrong, I have already explained that if you are trained to do it right and know your limits you are fine.

d'Oracle

Thaedydal wrote: »

It can if you do it wrong, I have already explained that if you are trained to do it right and know your limits you are fine.

How?

Find me evidence to suggest that the womb can be hurt by lifting.

Gauge

That's one that confounded me too- when I had to move to another desk in the office recently I carried my CRT monitors to the new spot myself- I know how to pick up and carry stuff properly so it wasn't a big deal, but I immediately got given out to by a co-worker who told me that lifting a monitor could damage my womb. If that's true then my womb is probably beyond repair at this stage... I haven't noticed any ill effects.

d'Oracle

Gauge wrote: »

That's one that confounded me too- when I had to move to another desk in the office recently I carried my CRT monitors to the new spot myself- I know how to pick up and carry stuff properly so it wasn't a big deal, but I immediately got given out too by a co-worker who told me that lifting a monitor could damage my womb. If that's true then my womb is probably beyond repair at this stage... I haven't noticed any ill effects.

Thats nice of them, to be concerned for your womb.

Nevyn

/sigh

It is not the organ of the womb it's self that is short hand for saying the ligaments of the pelvic floor which hold and support the womb. Damage to them may result in a greater chance of miscarrying when you are pregnant and as the pregnancy advances.

Gauge

d'Oracle wrote: »

Thats nice of them, to be concerned for your womb.

Yeah, it didn't occur to me until about five hours later just how weird that was.

g'em

Thaedydal wrote: »

/sigh

It is not the organ of the womb it's self that is short hand for saying the ligaments of the pelvic floor which hold and support the womb. Damage to them may result in a greater chance of miscarrying when you are pregnant and as the pregnancy advances.

Push-ups can NOT cause a prolapsed womb.

Heavy lifting, if done for extended periods or using very, very bad form, may in rare cases contribute to a prolapsed womb.

d'Oracle

/sigh

Anyone can injure the pelvic floor lifting things poorly.
Men or women.

Studies only indicate that womb damage due to pelvic prolapse relate to "prolonged heavy lifting".

There is virtually no evidence to suggest lifting a monitor or a tyre now and again will damage the womb.

Edit: I shouldn't have bothered. Knew g'em would sort this one.

Nevyn

A womb doesn't have to be prolapsed or semi prolapsed to causes issues with carrying a pregnancy to term.
I don't have an issues lifting CRTs or changing a tyre personally.

If a woman knows how to left things properly and feels she can and isn't in a heap with cramps then great but the not expecting women to do so is about consideration, after all should a woman have to explain that she is not up to lifting something due to cramps and bleeding from the crotch and should work collegees have to hear it?

It's easier and better manners to offer and if you don't need assistance to politely refuse and take the offer as being well meaning and considerate and not sexist.

MagicMarker

Doing push ups can damage any number of muscles if done wrong. Why exactly are we talking about the womb?

If I ask a women if she needs help lifting something, it's not because she might get a boo boo in her womb. It's because I think she might need help lifting stuff.

d'Oracle

MagicMarker wrote: »

Doing push ups can damage any number of muscles if done wrong.

OP I think this thread has gone wayward.

Orla K

Thaedydal wrote: »

A womb doesn't have to be prolapsed or semi prolapsed to causes issues with carrying a pregnancy to term.
I don't have an issues lifting CRTs or changing a tyre personally.

If a woman knows how to left things properly and feels she can and isn't in a heap with cramps then great but the not expecting women to do so is about consideration, after all should a woman have to explain that she is not up to lifting something due to cramps and bleeding from the crotch and should work collegees have to hear it?

It's easier and better manners to offer and if you don't need assistance to politely refuse and take the offer as being well meaning and considerate and not sexist.

Would it not be easier to ask for help when needed and not have people offering all the time (and some people would take advantage of others offering help all the time). Most don't ask for a reason and wouldn't want one anyway. Even so I'll still lift things on my period (don't see what difference cramps make) but I will be a bitch about it (but at that time I'm a bitch about everything)

MagicMarker

d'Oracle wrote: »

Please tell me you're joking?

Orla K

d'Oracle wrote: »

OP I think this thread has gone wayward.

I agree.

Nevyn

Because not everyone who needs assistance will ask for it, that is why it is good manners to offer and good manners to refuse poilety and not get your knickers in a knot, it's nice and it's nice to be nice.

d'Oracle

MagicMarker wrote: »

Please tell me you're joking?

Please tell me how that can be a joke?

Khannie

MagicMarker wrote: »

Doing push ups can damage any number of muscles if done wrong.

What now? I am yet to see a push up related injury*, though I have rarely seen a push up done correctly.



*sore muscles the next day do not count as an injury in my book, else I'm constantly in a state of injury. I've had sore muscles from hard work somewhere on my body for the last week or more.

d'Oracle

I actually reckon you could do it.
But you would have to actually try.
If you dropped your chest faster than your arms and sort of bounced at the bottom, you might do your rotor cuff.

Or you could faceplant doing clappy pushups.

gillo_100

d'Oracle wrote: »

Or you could faceplant doing clappy pushups.

http://www.break.com/usercontent/2007/12/Faceplant-Push-up-clap-goes-wrong-414794.html

Orla K

Thaedydal wrote: »

Because not everyone who needs assistance will ask for it, that is why it is good manners to offer and good manners to refuse poilety and not get your knickers in a knot, it's nice and it's nice to be nice.

I think that's where you and me differ, I will agree it is nice to be nice and if I see someone struggling with something I will offer help. But anyone who knows they need help and won't ask I deem as an 'idiot'. I find your way a bit too pc for me, I tend to go with men and women do the same work (maybe not in the same quanity) it's probably from being raised in a family full of guys and the women were 'in charge' and did as much (maybe more) than the guys.

MagicMarker

Khannie wrote: »

What now? I am yet to see a push up related injury*, though I have rarely seen a push up done correctly.



*sore muscles the next day do not count as an injury in my book, else I'm constantly in a state of injury. I've had sore muscles from hard work somewhere on my body for the last week or more.

Obviously I'm not saying you'll break your arm if you do a push up wrong, but of course there are minor injuries that can happen during any kind of exercise.

This is all besides the point, which is that offering to help a woman lift something because she may damage her womb and cause proplems later on in life during pregnancy, is really kinda silly.

Terodil

I am yet to witness a woman offering to help carry something heavy when the man in question is weak.

'Hey, you look as if you're ready to fall over, let me help you, weakling?'

Sexism? Yes.

---

On more general terms, as long as nobody is getting damaged mentally or physically, I think it takes some really bad experiences or serious malevolence to construe nice gestures as sexist. E.g. opening the doors, pulling the chair back, taking the coat off etc. Yes I know you can do all that stuff yourself. I'm not doing it because I'm a man and you're a woman, I'm doing it because I appreciate you and want you to be comfortable :rolleyes:

d'Oracle

MagicMarker wrote: »

Obviously I'm not saying you'll break your arm if you do a push up wrong, but of course there are minor injuries that can happen during any kind of exercise.

This is all besides the point, which is that offering to help a woman lift something because she may damage her womb and cause proplems later on in life during pregnancy, is really kinda silly.

I think the thread wants to be about push-ups.
Its taken its own direction.

Its alive.....

Orla K

Orla K wrote: »

'can you not reverse it?'

To be fair alot of people can't.

I remember going too by my first car, and being abused by this salesman because I didn't want a micra. :mad:

I really like to see the politeness that is chilivary, It puts me in such good form.
For something to be sexism, there has to be a desire to degrade the individual in my opinion.
Frankly I just ignore those people, because the best answer for them is to get on with my own business.

Once I asked about opportunities for career advancement in an interview. I was told that "The lads like those jobs".
And to be fair it saved me wasting my time with company.

kayos

God reading this thread makes me think even holding the door open for someone and that someone happens to be feamle could be deemed sexist. I'll do it for any one male or female. To me its just manners...

Have we come so far as to now think that what is done out of manners or curtisy is now being viewed by some as a sexist thing? I really hope not or I'm in trouble.

Khannie

Orla K wrote: »

But anyone who knows they need help and won't ask I deem as an 'idiot'.

It's very rare that somebody actually "needs" help. Most of the time people can get by without it. I don't see the harm in being offered it though.

Let's pretend for a minute......

I see you're about to lift a heavy item and I'm pretty certain that you're gonna struggle a bit doing it. Now let's say I think it'll be f*ck all effort for me to lift the same item. I'm gonna offer to lift it for you. That's how I was brought up and I'm glad of it.

Are you seriously gonna be offended by that?

Nevyn

Terodil wrote: »

I am yet to witness a woman offering to help carry something heavy when the man in question is weak.

I have, it's good manners and considerate.

Terodil wrote: »

'Hey, you look as if you're ready to fall over, let me help you, weakling?'

I would never say that, but would say "Hey do you need a hand with that, it may be easier with two people".

Terodil wrote: »

On more general terms, as long as nobody is getting damaged mentally or physically, I think it takes some really bad experiences or serious malevolence to construe nice gestures as sexist. E.g. opening the doors, pulling the chair back, taking the coat off etc. Yes I know you can do all that stuff yourself. I'm not doing it because I'm a man and you're a woman, I'm doing it because I appreciate you and want you to be comfortable :rolleyes:

I would say it depends, offering to lift something or help to lift something in the work place is nice, but someone offering to take my coat or pull back a chair for me in the work place would bother me, that type of behaviour while out of a date or with a partner is wonderful mind.

Opening doors seems to be a minefield tbh, but if that is part of someone's good manners I won't disrespect them or myself by being rude about it.

shellyboo

Terodil wrote: »

I am yet to witness a woman offering to help carry something heavy when the man in question is weak.

'Hey, you look as if you're ready to fall over, let me help you, weakling?'

Sexism? Yes.

I'd say that's fairly disingenuous now, tbh. I highly doubt that there are many women out there who would let ANYONE, man or woman, struggle to the point of falling over without offering to help.

On a less extreme scale, sure it happens. My 17 year old brother, who's skinny as a rake, often carries things for me, and I'd imagine I'm a good bit stronger than him. But he offers and I think it'd be rude to refuse politeness like that, especially when he's at the age he's at, it's nice that he even thinks of it.

There's a lot of etiquette issues tied up with this - I mean, would you not be offended, Terodil, if a woman offered to carry something for you if you weren't really struggling? I can't think of too many men I know who wouldn't take that as an insult or a dig.

Terodil wrote: »

On more general terms, as long as nobody is getting damaged mentally or physically, I think it takes some really bad experiences or serious malevolence to construe nice gestures as sexist. E.g. opening the doors, pulling the chair back, taking the coat off etc. Yes I know you can do all that stuff yourself. I'm not doing it because I'm a man and you're a woman, I'm doing it because I appreciate you and want you to be comfortable :rolleyes:

I'm right with you on this though. I completely appreciate chivalry and politeness and good manners, it's a real winner for me. If a man is thoughtful enough to do any of these things, I'm sold.

d'Oracle

kayos wrote: »

God reading this thread makes me think even holding the door open for someone and that someone happens to be feamle could be deemed sexist.

I'm not sure where you got that......

In fairness the thread started. Went more or less to plevic injuries and lifting, then pushups then a few guys saying its ok to help girls. No girls protesting much.

JC 2K3

Thaedydal wrote: »

A womb doesn't have to be prolapsed or semi prolapsed to causes issues with carrying a pregnancy to term.
I don't have an issues lifting CRTs or changing a tyre personally.

If a woman knows how to left things properly and feels she can and isn't in a heap with cramps then great but the not expecting women to do so is about consideration, after all should a woman have to explain that she is not up to lifting something due to cramps and bleeding from the crotch and should work collegees have to hear it?

It's easier and better manners to offer and if you don't need assistance to politely refuse and take the offer as being well meaning and considerate and not sexist.

You can't just change your original premise of why you believed women should not be lifting things. You distinctly referred to a woman's womb as the reason, now you seem to have backed down and brought up period cramps, which are completely unrelated to what's being discussed.

Your original post was quite clearly perpetuating a myth. (Although, if you can link to something reputable which indicates that women lifting things carries a serious risk to their ability to carry a pregnancy to term, then I will stand corrected and accept your point.)

Btw, it is indeed good manners to offer help to others who may need it, but gender should not come into that.

Otis Driftwood

I would consider myself to be a little old fashioned in some respects.Eg,if I saw a woman carrying a couple of shopping bags I would ask if she needed a hand.Absolutely nothing sexist in my offer because as Khannie pointed out,by and large,men are physically stronger than women yet on more than one occasion I was told to F off.Why is this?Do women think that when a guy offers her some assistance that he is going to mug her or something?

Same as if Im out and the bar is crowded.If I had a seat I would always offer it to a female standing nearby,whether I knew them or not but again,on more than one occasion I was told to stick it.

Dont get me wrong,more often than not,the abouve 2 examples would be well received but it does happen that Ive gotten rude responses by simply trying to be a decent human being.I believe thats because of 1 of 2 things.

1.The "im a female,I dont need a mans help"
2.They think that as a bloke,I have some other agenda for making the offer.

They are both sexist reasons.

Even on this very forum there is a "men are wusses" thread.Sexist,no?

If someone went onto the BGRH forum or even AH and started a similar thread only directed at women,how would that go down?

Im not naive enough to think that men are more sinned against than sinning when it comes to sexism.The fact is,the level of the 2 are poles apart.There is the blatant and obvious sexism ie the womans place is in the home,Im a man,Id never change nappies,thats the womans job etc.Both absolute nonsense but unfortunatly things like this do exist.My own father God bless him would be very much of this mindset.Its not his fault,he grew up in a rural area where that was and still is,to a certain extent anyway,the norm.

I would see the above as being forgivable though,men in his age group come from a totally different generation and its near impossible to change a life long mindset.What does annoy me is when I hear men of a similar age group to me spouting this retro BS.FFS,its 2009,not the 1950s.Or when a woman comments on this attitude some people automatically assume she is a bra burning feminist or something ridiculous like that.

I do think sexism on some level will always exist,certainly for the rest of my lifetime but its up to us as parents and future parents to do our level best to raise our kids in a less phalocentric society.

(the above might seem a little muddled,Im tired.:o)

gillo_100

shellyboo wrote: »

There's a lot of etiquette issues tied up with this - I mean, would you not be offended, Terodil, if a woman offered to carry something for you if you weren't really struggling? I can't think of too many men I know who wouldn't take that as an insult or a dig.

Can't say its ever happened me, but I would just think it odd as opposed to being offended.
The same way that I would think it odd to offer to carry something for a woman if she wasn't struggling in any way.

Khannie

shellyboo wrote: »

I'm right with you on this though. I completely appreciate chivalry and politeness and good manners, it's a real winner for me. If a man is thoughtful enough to do any of these things, I'm sold.

/me takes note for sexytime seduction at the karaoke beers

shellyboo

Khannie wrote: »

/me takes note for sexytime seduction at the karaoke beers

o_0

It's not nice to tease, Khannie!

Terodil

shellyboo wrote: »

I'd say that's fairly disingenuous now, tbh. I highly doubt that there are many women out there who would let ANYONE, man or woman, struggle to the point of falling over without offering to help.

Hmm, I'm honestly not trying to build up a point here, I genuinely haven't seen it happen that way around yet... I think. Or if I have it must have been so rare that I can't remember.

Besides my made-up quote was to demonstrate two things: The sexism involved in the failure of some women to offer help (according to my experience) and the sexism involved in men regarding it as utter humiliation to be helped by a woman.

shellyboo wrote: »

There's a lot of etiquette issues tied up with this - I mean, would you not be offended, Terodil, if a woman offered to carry something for you if you weren't really struggling? I can't think of too many men I know who wouldn't take that as an insult or a dig.

Exactly, that's what I was trying to get at with my imaginary quote. And that is sexism, whatever way we want to turn it. Most things can easily be carried together, so it's not a 1/0 choice anyway

Running Bing

Oh get over it, I'll always help a women lift something heavy, hold the door for them or let them enter into a room first. If your too insecure to accept that fair enough but I was raised to treat women right. :rolleyes:

Nevyn

Cos periods have nothing to do with a woman having a womb :rolleyes:

JC 2K3

Thaedydal wrote: »

Cos periods have nothing to do with a woman having a womb :rolleyes:

The argument that women shouldn't lift heavy things because they might damage their pelvic floor ligaments has absolutely nothing to do with periods or cramps.

Nevyn

You always seem to want to argue with me JC 2K3, I really don't know why.

JC 2K3 wrote: »

The argument that women shouldn't lift heavy things because they might damage their pelvic floor ligaments has absolutely nothing to do with periods or cramps.

And the argument was both*, and both are related to having a womb.

*as in lifting things incorrectly when you have not been trained and which are too heavy

bakkiesbotha

The reason it is considered gentlemanly to help women with certain physical activities, such as opening doors or lifting things, is not because a gentleman believes that a woman is incapable of doing these things themselves, it is out of politeness. It is a way of sparing her blushes and keeping alive a fictional image of a woman.

A gentleman recognises the difficulty in maintaining the elaborate house of cards that is a woman in public. It demands fierce concentration to make sure that your face is tilted at the right angle, your stomach is tucked in, your ass is minimised, your back is straight, your walk is just so, and your face is displaying an carefree expression, as if none of this is actually going on. And a woman can't afford to take her mind off the job for a second, or the whole complicated edifice will come crumbling down.

Also, many women squeeze themselves into clothes that don't fit and that look ridiculous in all but one or two poses, so they need to hold these poses all night, and can't afford to move normally.

Just like a gentleman walks on the outside of the pavement in order to shield his companion from any splashes from the passing traffic, he performs these little courtiesies like opening doors and lifting boxes for her so that she doesn't have to lean clumsily in one direction and reveal a flabby tricep, or have to bend over and display an enormous ass.

Just like someone said, a gentleman does this so as not to draw attention to a woman's less attractive features, like bleeding at the crotch.