What's the most insulting present you ever got?

kelle

Right, it was my birthday yesterday - I am now 39. A lot of miles on the clock I know, but I look and feel a lot younger. Sure, last weekend I was at a nightclub dancing till 4am! I'm fitter and slimmer than I was at 20.

Anyway I was pleased to have people telling me yesterday that I look nowhere near 39 - that was enough of a birthday present for me!

Until I arrived home from work today to find a card and a present from my mother-in-law. The present? Olay anti-wrinkle provital tinted moisturiser for mature skin!!!!!! FFS, this stuff is for over-70s!! I'm tempted to ask her did she leave her new moisturiser behind by accident. But I'll just have a rant on Boards instead!

So what's the worst birthday present you ever got?

4zn76tysfajdxp

Well you know, turning 39 now is a lot different to her day when they were considered pretty much past it. Perhaps her perception of people in their late-30s hasn't shifted as the times changed? The present was kind of thoughtful too, certainly better than a card on its own. Happy birthday btw.

Oryx

My worst presents are a toss up between a dyson vacuum cleaner and bog standard trivial pursuit. Both from my oh at different times.

My mil always gives me money, even though I tell her not to. Feels awful getting a card with money in, but still its kind. Still Im sure yours meant well..... Could have been worse. She could have got you a pair of belly control pants or some tena lady.

kelle

Thanks Frada! TBH, I'd have preferred a bar of chocolate from her.

Oryx wrote: »

She could have got you a pair of belly control pants or some tena lady.

THAT'LL BE PROBABLY FOR MY BIG ONE NEXT YEAR!

aoibhebree

A friend of mine got an epilator off her husband for Christmas once!

Oryx

aoibhebree wrote: »

A friend of mine got an epilator off her husband for Christmas once!

The only answer to that is to use it on him.

metaoblivia

A blue tooth.

It probably doesn't sound so bad, but in the weeks leading up to my birthday, my mother asked me what I wanted and I gave her a bunch of options that were all under $50 and easy to find (our family is really into birthday/Christmas lists - we're not big on surprises). And she asked if I would like something like a blue tooth or something for my phone because she had just gotten a blue tooth and she really liked it. So I told her that, no I didn't want a blue tooth, I rarely used my phone to begin with and never in the car.
She decided to buy me the blue tooth anyway, sent it to me (along with the receipt - so even if she had already bought the blue tooth before asking me what I wanted for my birthday, she could have returned it. And why bother asking what I want for my birthday anyway if you've already bought me something?) and sent along a note saying she hoped I changed my mind and if not, give it to someone else.

It wasn't so much the gift itself that was insulting, moreso the fact that she completely ignored me. And it wasn't the first time something like this had happened. So I called her and we exchanged words. She threatened to never send me a present again and I said that was fine, I was a big girl and I didn't need presents, but I did need a mother who would listen to me. I sent the bluetooth back to her and that was that.

I know some people will think I'm just ungrateful. But I feel I was in the right. And it turned out to be a win-win. Ever since, she has listened to me and bought me wonderful presents that I can actually use and enjoy, and that has made the both of us happy.

bronte

This didn't happen to me, but my dad once bought my mum a bathroom shelf. For Valentine's Day. Which is also their anniversary.

And people wonder why I'm not too keen on marraige.

P.s. No my mum is not some kind of bathroom enthusiast.

Handsome Bob

A medicine ball from my parents. Yeah I was at my heaviest, but still, better to approach the issue directly.:pac:

stiff kitten

wrong age on birthday card

Nevyn

A pink dress.

Xiney

I got "Life Strategies for Teens" the self help book written by dr phil's son for my 16th birthday from a neighbour.


Who the hell buys an unsolicited self help book for someone for their birthday!?

Khannie

lol kelle. That is indeed a sh!t present.

aoibhebree wrote: »

A friend of mine got an epilator off her husband for Christmas once!

Haha. I got asked for one for Christmas once by a girl I was going out with. I bought it too!

On topic: I actually can't remember what the most insulting present I've ever gotten was. Maybe I've never been insulted by a present. More likely that my brain is crap and I just can't remember. There are times when having a crap brain is useful, and this is probably one of them.

4zn76tysfajdxp

metaoblivia wrote: »

Ever since, she has listened to me and bought me wonderful presents that I can actually use and enjoy, and that has made the both of us happy.

Like a gold tooth?

sam34

i never got something particularly insulting.
my father did get me one of those cardboard concertina filing yokes once "for all your documents" he said - useful, but not a nice present.

my sisters mother in law gave her a weight loss dvd one year called "lose the fat for life"! my sis was disgusted. ironically enough she separated from her husband that year, and took great pleasure in telling his mother that she had indeed lost the fat - all 13stone of him!

sillyputty

For secret santa in school once i got a pen from a boy in my class - it was used - how did i know? - the lid had teeth marks

aoife161

When I was younger my little brother was at the age where he had enough money saved up by Christmas to buy people presents. It was his first Christmas to do this and I remember he was very excited. There's 9 of us in the family so we all knew we'd be getting small presents, as he only had a certain amount of cash.

I got a mirror and a hairbrush. HA HA HA... I know it seems innocent, but I couldn't help but wonder if he was trying to tell me something.

Not the worst present I've every received but certainly one that i'll always remember with a smile.

metaoblivia

Davina Deafening Desert wrote: »

Like a gold tooth?

No, although I may add that to my Christmas list for 2009.

pikachucheeks

It wasn't a Birthday present, but one I got for Christmas!

My grandmother used to always insist on buying me clothes - all of which were awful looking and ended up being given to a charity shop, once I'd been bribed into wearing them around her once!

One Christmas, she got me a jumper - don't recall details, I just remember it was hideous and that it was four sizes too big

To add to insult, my dad then tried it on, to try and cheer me up ... and it was swimming on him!

Then he pointed out "Everyone's given you clothes in large sizes and smelly stuff for the bath - I think they're trying to send you a message!"

Que hysterical sobbing on Christmas Day

Nightwish

My mother gave me a Gillian McKeith book a few years ago. She knows I despise the woman, seeing as she's a shyster and secondly, I dont diet and nor do I need to. The book went in the bin that very day.

Dudess

It wasn't insulting, it was just "wtf?!" - drawer liners for Christmas from my aunt when I was 26/27-ish. And she normally gives me fairly cool pressies. They were lily of the valley and my gran adores lily of the valley, so I really think my aunt got our parcels mixed up... I hope

Granted, I didn't hear anything about my gran getting a La Senza voucher that year :pac:

4zn76tysfajdxp

I also wasn't insulted but slightly bemused by the present of a multimeter one christmas from my older brother when I was around fifteen or sixteen.



I also got a kite from another brother that same year.

Nightwish

But kites are cool!

Dudess

LOL
What IS that thing?

Dudess

Actually I've just realised "drawer-liners" might read as "knicker-liners" to some. If so, no (shame on you - scented knicker liners for my gran :eek:), they were literally drawer-liners - scented sheet-things you put in a drawer:

4zn76tysfajdxp

Nightwish wrote: »

But kites are cool!

That was kinda cool. Never got to use it though, it was lost by the time summer came around.

Dudess wrote: »

LOL
What IS that thing?

I'm not sure, so I checked Wikipedia:

Wikipedia wrote:

A multimeter or a multitester, also known as a volt/ohm meter or VOM, is an electronic measuring instrument that combines several measurement functions in one unit. A typical multimeter may include features such as the ability to measure voltage, current and resistance.

I still haven't the foggiest...

Pat the Patriot

a weighing scales for the bathroom from my Mother for my 30th birthday.......I think she reckoned I was putting on weight. Shes about as subtle as a sledgehammer ;-)

Secret santa at work, I got a candle holder that I saw in Lidl for 2.50 EUR the next day.....the limit for gifts was a fiver.

Khannie

Dudess wrote: »

LOL
What IS that thing?

I got a multimeter as a christmas present from a girlfriend once.

It's actually a very handy piece of kit and has in fact saved me from being electrocuted more than once (DAMN YOU SHODDY ELECTRICIANS!), but it takes some learning to know how to use it properly.

Ok ok....I'll stop trying to justify it now.

Dudess

Phew! You've saved me from the awkwardness of having to stop you!

My wonderful husband once gave me - on mothers day - a card with two scratchcards in it. Apparently it was because, even though I gave birth to his children, I'm not his mother .

He hasn't made that mistake since.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Deleted User wrote: »

Apparently it was because, even though I gave birth to his children, I'm not his mother

Well he's right, you're not his mother. That would be weird...

Davina Deafening Desert

Davina Deafening Desert wrote: »

Well he's right, you're not his mother. That would be weird...

but kinda kinky

4zn76tysfajdxp

Deleted User wrote: »

but kinda kinky

Yeah, you're right. Then every day would be mother's day.

Silverfish

A multimeter is a great pressie. You never know when you'll need a multimeter til you don't have one, and then what?


My parents got me a teapot and a skirt for work for my 18th. Bad enough, but then....

My sister got a Mitsubishi Pajero for hers.

Handsome Bob

Silverfish wrote: »

My parents got me a teapot and a skirt for work for my 18th. Bad enough, but then....

My sister got a Mitsubishi Pajero for hers.

Did your parents somehow come into money between your and your sister's 18th? :pac:

Xiney

oh yeah, forgot about (blocked out all memory of?) all the makeup I used to get as presents as a teenager.


As if the reason I was a much closer approximation to daria (complete with remarks drier than the gobi) as opposed to quinn was the fact that I didn't have makeup...

Sleipnir

I got one of those car valet kits with all the polishes, sprays and cleaners in a bag. Here is it actually

Yeah, okay, that's not too bad really except the following items weren't in it;
Super Resin Polish 325ml
Jumbo Car Wash Sponge
"8 pieces Perfect Polishing Cloth"
Quick Clear Screenwash
36 page full colour Car Care guide

and the intensive cleaner had dried liquid all around top and was half empty!

i.e, it had been used and I'd been given whatever she didn't want!

byhookorbycrook

earrings..my ears are not pierced..and from someone who knew me very well.

nesbitt

I think the le crueset casserole dish (very good bye the way) and set of kitchen knives from my ex... LOL!

I got an anti aging face cream too once but it was Lancome so what the hell it was lovely product....

Dudess

byhookorbycrook wrote: »

earrings..my ears are not pierced

But "all you need is a thumbtack and a whole lot of paper towels"...

4zn76tysfajdxp

Silverfish wrote: »

My parents got me a teapot and a skirt for work for my 18th. Bad enough, but then....

My sister got a Mitsubishi Pajero for hers.

I remember one christmas I asked for a particular model of mobile phone from the folks. They refused becuase it was "too expensive."

My younger brother later got the phone I wanted that very same year...a week early.

Dudess wrote: »

But "all you need is a thumbtack and a whole lot of paper towels"...

Are we still talking about the Multimeter?

Dudess

Silverfish wrote: »

My parents got me a teapot and a skirt for work for my 18th. Bad enough, but then....

My sister got a Mitsubishi Pajero for hers.

God yeah, I'm only remembering now the mountains and mountains of preparation-for-a-life-of-domestic-bliss pressies for little girls which I got from my parents (and my nana who was quite forward-thinking for a woman of her generation): the dustpan and brush set, the bigger sweeping brush set, the saucepans set, the casserole dish set, the acres of teasets, the Sindy kitchen appliances.

:mad:

Oh well, it didn't pay off - I'm useless at housework :pac:

The beast that raised my ex, once almost gave me an illumious pink chenille scarf that obviously came from a charity shop.
That her sister had given her for christmas.
After much scarve twirling and mulling she decided not to, and told me she didn't like the perfume I had given her anyway.
Even though it was her perfume.
And one of the other girlfriends inherited the scarf.

tman

Last Crimbo there was a lucky dip of unmarked presents doing the rounds... The one I ended up opening? Tea tree foot powder...

It wasn't meant for anyone in particular, but I still found it pretty damn insulting... To this day I haven't found out who wrapped it up in the first place:p (I'm guessing my 7 year old nephew)

Jules

Hagar please read the charter before you post, next time will be an infraction.

Gauge

A Family Guy calender off my parents for Christmas I don't know what made them think I like Family Guy, I never watch it, I never speak of it. And now I have a calender on my desk that I'm going to have to rip all the days off before my mother visits in August.

An ex gave me a present of a teddy bear and a necklace- while I feel guilty complaining because he certainly didn't HAVE to- all they did was prove how little he knew about me because anyone who's known me for more than five minutes could have told him that I'm just not the type of girl who is won over by generic Hallmark teddies and tacky diamond-style necklaces from Argos.

4zn76tysfajdxp

tman wrote: »

Last Crimbo there was a lucky dip of unmarked presents doing the rounds... The one I ended up opening? Tea tree foot powder...

Maybe it was for the christmas tree? It was "tree foot" powder after all...

Hagar

Apologies Jules.

Salome

I remember my brother got my mother a deep fat fryer for her birthday once.

I also recall a colleague who got an ironing board cover for her Secret Santa present...nice :rolleyes:.

Dudess

I'm sorry for all the Simpsons' references but this one is too appropriate:

Marge: Oh Homey, look at that watch! I've always wanted a watch like that!
Homer: Well maybe someone will give you one for Christmas!
(thinking) Now she'll really be surprised when she opens that ironing board cover!

Will

my worst present was the non present

when i turned 21 my god mother called over to the house to stinge some free cake and drink i presume. I knew what she's like so wasn't expecting anything at all from her. Was totally fine by that.

Anywho she took me aside and said "I will have your present for ya when I see ya next, don't worry".

Cue this going on for the next 8 months (I kid you not) and each time saying the same exact thing. I would rather she said that she isn't gonna get me anything, but she kept drawing it out longer and longer. Every time it was harder and harder to not say anything to her, but somehow i managed to crack a smile.

We called over one evening, think it was my cousins graduation from secondary or something. She calls me out into the garden. I knew what was coming, well i thought i did, the same old excuse, but she hands me 2 €5 notes and says ''happy birthday, told ya i wouldn't forget you!''.

Again, I cracked a smile and said as genuinely as i could "thank you". Dunno how I didn't throw it back at her. They're minted by the way, but that isn't the point I suppose.