Have you ever been robbed?

Pighead

Pighead has. They took his bicycle. And it wasn't just any old bicycle. It was the best bicycle out of all the bicycles in the nearby area. It was a British Eagle mountain bike and it had 21 gears and was metallic black with beautiful strokes of silver lightly brushed through various points of the bodywork. It was an absolute work of art and every time Pighead sat on it's saddle he felt like a superhero or sometimes a cowboy.

Everybody in the village used to call Pighead "The Eagle". It was the greatest nickname a young child could ever dare to hope for. Especially considering the fact that the rest of the gang consisted of Fathead, ratface, horse(he had a ridiculously long face) and ET(extra thin).

Anyway one day "The Eagle" was gliding down to the village shop when he seen a donkey in distress in a nearby field. The poor fcuker was caught up in a load of barbed wire and was crying it's little donkey eyes out. Jumped off the bike, laid it down in the ditch and heroically strode across the field and freed the donkey from its torment. The donkey nodded as if to say "Cheers Eagle, nice one buddy"

Walked back to the ditch where the bike had been laid but it was nowhere to be seen. The bike was gone. It had been stolen. Pighead cried and cried and cried some more. Never ever got the bike back. The robbers had stolen not just a great bike but a great nickname as well. The Eagle was dead and was to be replaced by Donkey Lover.

So whats the greatest thing that the robbers have stolen from you?

connundrum

I crashed my project car when I was 19, and it was wrote off.

I hadn't got it insured fully comp so I was getting nothing back. I had to strip the car and sell everything - wingmirrors, bootlid, stereo etc. I had taken off the alloys and stacked them at the back of the house for a mate to come and collect them the next day, and just to be extra safe I padlocked a chain around them.

I woke up the next morning to find a track through the back yard and onto the road where the 'burglar' had dragged all four wheels (stacked as they were).

I had a certain amount of respect for a man who would put so much effort into anything. But I was devasted as the €700 I would have made from the sale of them would've had me living like a king for 12 - 14 weeks

For months after I'd still be looking at other people's alloys as they drove by, in the hope that I'd spot mine and finally be reunited. I even got in a war of words with a young lad who I thought had them, I backed off when he showed me the receipt for the purchase. Bad times

Pighead

connundrum wrote: »

I had a certain amount of respect for a man who would put so much effort into anything.

This bit reminds me of the old Jack Handy quote "Even though he was an enemy of mine, I had to admit that what he had accomplished was a brilliant piece of strategy. First, he punched me, then he kicked me, then he punched me again."

Zadkiel

I feel your pain Pighead
Never had anything robbed, a Junkie tried to mug me once and stuck a knife in me.
That ruined my day that did :mad:

Pighead

Ass wrote: »

taking one for the team bro.

Another mindless cliche! And worse still it's not even an Irish cliche. It's a robbed American cliche.

Whatever will you come up with next. Pighead reckons you're gonna hit him with the razor sharp "Ah sure Pighead, thats the way the cookie crumbles" or maybe the classic "Takes one to know one"

You're an unoriginal sham American wannabee Arse!

Insect Overlord

I had my first bike robbed when I was 6 or 7. I left it down in the front garden, went into the house for dinner, and when I went looking for it the following morning it was gone, never to be seen again.

I had my second bike stolen 10 weeks ago, but it was taken from the back garden so it was much more worrying :mad: I did replace it with a much faster, much sleeker model though

Nodin

Pighead wrote: »

Everybody in the village used to call Pighead "The Eagle".

...suprised some fvker didn't try to poison ye.

Dave!

Guess what Pighead? Your old pal Dave has gone and made your day. When you go home this evening, there may be a little surprise waiting for you in the living room I'll say no more! But hurry home after work! You're welcome buddy

LoveDucati2

A friend of mine was mugged in Dublin a few years ago.
Junkie came up to him at a bank machine with a syringe, my friend dropped his wallet on the ground and dumb junkie bent down to pick it up, silly junkie received 1 or more kicks about his person and got stabbed more than once with his own syringe in the face.

Pighead

Dave! wrote: »

Guess what Pighead? Your old pal Dave has gone and made your day. When you go home this evening, there may be a little surprise waiting for you in the living room I'll say no more! But hurry home after work! You're welcome buddy

Is this gonna be a Surprise Surprise moment where you reunite Pighead with that donkey he saved all those years ago? Please let it be so.

dlofnep

I am saddened by your loss, but also humoured by your creativity. I'm overwhelmed by feelings. But most importantly, I hope these dastardly bastards return your loved possession.

I have never been robbed.

Wagon

I remember a lad i know chained his bike outside his gaff every night after he got home from work. Eventually, he lost the key and the bike just sat there for a while. A few weeks later he went outside and the saddle was missing. He was angry but he couldn't find teh key anywhere so he decided to get it sorted when he could.

The next day, the handlebars were gone. Then the day after that he was down some peddles and a chain. Then the front wheel, back wheel the next day...eventaually all that was left was the frame. A poxy frame shaped like a mountain bike.

The next day, he went out side and he saw the sadistic cúnts sawed through the chain and took the frame. Over the course of a week, they robbed his bike piece by piece. Like that Johnny Cash song, except the Irish version.

mazroo

i came out monday morning to drive my car to work..... went to drive it............. two wheel on the left side were stolen..AND they had the cheek to rob all the bolts off the other side!!!!

my first car window was broken, radio robbed, the week after... my car was no more... ROBBED AND WRECKED!!!!!

So now im back on my bike:( frozen...

enda1

mazroo wrote: »

i came out monday morning to drive my car to work..... went to drive it............. two wheel on the left side were stolen..AND they had the cheek to rob all the bolts off the other side!!!!

my first car window was broken, radio robbed, the week after... my car was no more... ROBBED AND WRECKED!!!!!

So now im back on my bike:( frozen...

don't rub it in man

VivGrise

LoveDucati2 wrote: »

A friend of mine was mugged in Dublin a few years ago.
Junkie came up to him at a bank machine with a syringe, my friend dropped his wallet on the ground and dumb junkie bent down to pick it up, silly junkie received 1 or more kicks about his person and got stabbed more than once with his own syringe in the face.

Too good for him! if anyone ever came up to me with a syringe i would do my best to put them in A&E at least. Scum of the earth. I give money to charity and i can barely afford to get by, and some scumbag tries to mug me by infecting you with god knows what?!?


Fair play to you friend!


On topic, i was once approached by a load of knackers who tried to mug my (ex) girlfriends purse and handbag so i gave them a few flogs and got a few in return, they didnt get anything but i got two teeth knocked out!

Guards picked them up and turns out they were already after muggging someone that day aswell.

stovelid

Held up twice - once with a (replica, didn't know at the time) pistol, and once with a syringe.

Had about three bikes stolen in town, two from inside TCD.

Pighead

Pighead wrote: »

The Eagle was dead and was to be replaced by Donkey Lover.

So whats the greatest thing that the robbers have stolen from you?

You sure it wasn't Pighead, Pighead?

Had my wallet and passport robbed on a football trip when I was 16. Had them in my room stupidly in a drawer..... everyone else did too in fairness. So fúcking annoying having to go to an embassy so you could get out of the country. :mad:

Pighead

stovelid wrote: »

Held up twice - once with a (replica, didn't know at the time) pistol, and once with a syringe.

Had about three bikes stolen in town, two from inside TCD.

Getting one bike stolen is unfortunate, two is careless but three is indefensible. Did you not learn from your previous mistakes?

You remind Pighead of Sideshow Bob in the Simpsons episodes where he continuously got struck on the face because he continuously stood on rakes. From now on you shall be known as Sideshow stovelid.

UnderpantsGnome

Yes, I have.


Dey turk mah jerb!!! :mad::mad::mad:

togster

my wallet by some gypsies

ZiMZuM

My old car was broken into bout 1 1/2 yrs ago and all they took were my seat covers and floor mats,didnt even try to hot wire it or take the radio!!

worst thing was to get into the car they shoved something in the top of the door and bent it away from the car completly,cost of a new door was alot more than a couple of mats and seat covers!!!gits :mad::mad::mad:

ejmaztec

mazroo wrote: »

i came out monday morning to drive my car to work..... went to drive it............. two wheel on the left side were stolen..AND they had the cheek to rob all the bolts off the other side!!!!

my first car window was broken, radio robbed, the week after... my car was no more... ROBBED AND WRECKED!!!!!

So now im back on my bike frozen...

It wouldn't be a 21 gear British Eagle mountain bike, with an OTT metallic black/silver paint job, by any chance would it? :rolleyes: I'm telling on you. :P

bigeasyeah

I get robbed every week according to my payslip

stovelid

Pighead wrote: »

Getting one bike stolen is unfortunate, two is careless but three is indefensible. Did you not learn from your previous mistakes?

Even worse is that one of the times, I locked it to this chain-fence thingy in TCD that could be unhooked at one end. Easiest robbery ever.

banshee_bones

Had my mobile stolen a good few years ago, when i was in the gym. Thieves were kids, who got a crisis of consience when the guards got brought in. Yay for sign in sheets in sports facilities!

Two roma gypsies accosted me at the atm machine late one night last summer, covered the screen with a newspaper, hit the 200e button hoping to keep me distracted by continually asking fro change. I grabbed the money and called the guards on their sorry asses. They were arrested and i had to make a statement. and apparantly there were a gang of them picked up that same night.

So two near misses. . . .

Ciaran187

Let me tell you the story of The Blue Ba$tard. My blue 1995 peugeot 106. Loved that car. So much fun. Some scumbag in my apartment block put in the window and took my stereo and new led zeppelin album. Glass everywhere and the only piece of the window still in place was home to a quicker that said, somewhat ironically, Autolock Protected.

God I miss that car. And that album.

Lolabugs

I had a knacker come up to me in town and just yank my chain off!!!
Didnt argue... woman was the same age as my mother and looked like she was on something :eek:

Also a friend woke up one morning to go to work to find somebody had taken the alloys of her car and had put the thing on bricks!!! WTF??
Would have loved to see how they did that one!

Blazer

Lolabugs wrote: »

Also a friend woke up one morning to go to work to find somebody had taken the alloys of her car and had put the thing on bricks!!! WTF??
Would have loved to see how they did that one!

ah women...would't know a trolley jack if it came up and bit them on the ass.

Earthhorse

Pighead wrote: »

Pighead has. They took his bicycle. And it wasn't just any old bicycle. It was the best bicycle out of all the bicycles in the nearby area. It was a British Eagle mountain bike and it had 21 gears and was metallic black with beautiful strokes of silver lightly brushed through various points of the bodywork. It was an absolute work of art and every time Pighead sat on it's saddle he felt like a superhero or sometimes a cowboy.

I too know the pain of losing such a beautiful piece of engineering.

In first year in college I used to get the bus from outside my house down to Bird Avenue, which still left me with a good 20 minute walk to campus. Often, the bus would go by full, leaving me stranded in the rain or cold. And it was a smelly and slow commute whenever I did manage to board.

Come second year, with my 18th birthday approaching, I decided enough was enough. A moutain bike for me please - the first "big" present I'd ever asked for and a handy way of putting the bus behind me; both figuratively and literally. A British Eagle; black with silver streaks, just like yours - only 18 gears mind, but that was good enough for me. It was sleek, fast, comfortable and for two weeks I flew down the hill to college like some kind of king.

Then, one fateful day, I forgot my bike lock; but as I pulled into the bike racks I met a friend and had him lock our bikes together. That was the last I saw of my British Eagle.

We couldn't afford a replacement so instead I shopped around for a second hand bike. Like my British Eagle this bike came with 18 gears; unlike it, only two of them were designed for people who weren't Lance Armstrong. I still remember the look of joy on the family I bought it from as I test drove it by doing laps of their front driveway, you could see it written on their faces; "This guy, this guy is desperate enough to buy this off us."

bluto63

Had my phone pickpocketed a couple of times, always while drunk beyond the capacity of comprehending the situation.
Actually I recently learned that one of the times when I was pickpocketed, I was almost incapable of walking and my friend had taken my phone for safe keeping. While he was holding it, someone pickpocketed him! Took his time to admit it to me too

Pighead

That's a beautiful yet tragic story Earthhorse. Pighead can understand exactly what you must have went through. The British Eagle was just a phenomenal piece of machinery. Non Eagle owners can't even begin to understand the beauty and sheer wonder of those bikes.

Imagine the most comfortable seat you've ever sat on and then imagine that seat being carried by four winged speeding fantastic looking angels. And imagine the best film director in the world is capturing all this movement on camera in super sexy slow motion with the obligatory close up of your smooth shiny flowing hair blowing in the wind and a smile of pure satisfaction. Imagine that and you're somewhere close to the feeling of riding a British Eagle.