faking it!

scarymoon1

how many girls faked it during sex? i know i did with my ex!. im 26 and he was 27. i would moan loudly etc and fake it SOMETIMES! he never knew! do many other girls do this?

petes

Why bother?

Would you not just tell him what you want so that you can both enjoy yourselves?

scarymoon1

i only did it when i was tired and didn't want to offend him! was easier just to fake it.

monkeyfudge

I've done it.

If it's proving particularly boring or unstimulating then just saying you're done is the best way to finish up. No point in getting into a debate about it or possibly hurting someones feelings if you lose interest half way through.

petes

monkeyfudge wrote: »

I've done it.

If it's proving particularly boring or unstimulating then just saying you're done is the best way to finish up. No point in getting into a debate about it or possibly hurting someones feelings if you lose interest half way through.

I've done it before also but I got found out!!

ntlbell

What makes you think he would be offended?

Does he have delusions that he's don juan?

ntlbell

Insurgent wrote: »

I've done it before also but I got found out!!

did you forget to curl your toes?

miaowsky

sometimes no matter what he does it wont happen, so i think it's better to fake in those situations, that said i do feel awful for faking

petes

ntlbell wrote: »

did you forget to curl your toes?

No it was evident for a time afterwards that I didn't cum!

ntlbell

miaowsky wrote: »

sometimes no matter what he does it wont happen, so i think it's better to fake in those situations, that said i do feel awful for faking

you'd be surprised how little he probably cares.

he would be asleep before ye said

"it's not..."

ntlbell

Insurgent wrote: »

No it was evident for a time afterwards that I didn't cum!

amateur

petes

ntlbell wrote: »

amateur

Tell me about it, but we learn from our mistakes

Wibbs

I don't see the point of faking it for a few reasons. For a start if this happens a lot, then you're missing the pleasure of full sexual release. He won't learn. And if he can't tell whether you are or not, then he's not very open to your sexual responses. If a woman told me she faked in a relationship, then I would be irritated. First at her for not having the cop on to tell me it wasn't working for her and then at me for missing the fact.

Sleipnir

AH, guys can fake too. How many of you check the evidence?

scarymoon1

My Ex NEVER faked it. fact! guess i was better than him!! ha

ntlbell

Sleipnir wrote: »

AH, guys can fake too. How many of you check the evidence?

"where is it?"

"I hit the curtain, I'll get it in the morning ZzzZZzzZ"

spinandscribble

never ever faked it and never will. its negative encouragement.

chickenhawk

scarymoon1 wrote: »

he never knew!

He probably did but decided not to mention it.

I'm a guy and I've faked it. And I've had girls fake it. I don't think people should take it personally unless they do it frequently. Sometimes people are just not in the mood or are under stress about something else.

Dudess

If a guy gets upset because the girl he's doing isn't moaning, god bless his insecure little socks.

anonymous_joe

What's the point? The guy get's what he wants, you're the one who suffers. Sex isn't exactly a challenge, you just need to work out what both of you like.

nomorebadtown

scarymoon1 wrote: »

My Ex NEVER faked it. fact! guess i was better than him!! ha

you say that in a way that praises yourself and puts him down.

think about it.

he was getting satisfied everytime and thought he was the sex king (due to all your porno moaning). while you were lying there, never cumming and making dying whale noises.

more fool you.

Wibbs

Dudess wrote: »

If a guy gets upset because the girl he's doing isn't moaning, god bless his insecure little socks.

Well just maybe he gets upset, because she's not getting the full effect of love making and he feels bad about that. For her.

nomorebadtown wrote:

you say that in a way that praises yourself and puts him down.

think about it.

he was getting satisfied everytime and thought he was the sex king (due to all your porno moaning). while you were lying there, never cumming and making dying whale noises.

more fool you.

Have to say Im with you there. It would be like leaving your car in for a service and coming out and "Ha! they never found my dodgy brakes".

Ok I think I've scraped the barrel with that analogy. On a few levels:D

scarymoon1

i only faked it SOMETIMES. anyways the "porno moaning" as ya put it - i liked it

Polleta

I have never faked it. If I haven't come (which hasnt happened that often for me) then I've still enjoyed the ride(pardon the pun).

Faking it doesn't help anybody. There were times with my ex that one or the other didnt come.. generally due to an extra long session but neither or us were offended or upset by the lack of orgasm. I was be way more upset if I'd found out he faked.

midlandsmissus

Wibbs wrote: »

Well just maybe he gets upset, because she's not getting the full effect of love making and he feels bad about that. For her.

That's not true Wibbs. Guys want women to moan, not primarily because they want US to feel good, it is because it makes THEM feel good when we moan. It strokes their ego, it makes them feel the man.

I have had this conversation with every guy i've been with, and they all said 'men love it when women moan because men love the feeling of power that they get' My ex asked me to be more vocal, and I said 'no if i'm not feeling it, i'm not doing it'. A) I'm NOT feeling that great and you want me to act like i'm feelin that great just so you can feel great. Not fair.

Back on thread, i never fake and i really cant understand women who do. It just seems like the stupidest thing you could do.
1) He has come
2) You haven't come
3) You're telling him you like something he's doing that you don't, which will mean he will get the wrong idea and do it again
4) Why on earth can you not just say ' i won't come this time', if you can't come just tell them!

carolmon

I asked my partner once did he ever worry that I was faking it........his response????
"Hell No! You wouldn't be that nice!

Wibbs

midlandsmissus wrote: »

That's not true Wibbs.

well it is for me and other blokes I know.

Guys want women to moan, not primarily because they want US to feel good, it is because it makes THEM feel good when we moan. It strokes their ego, it makes them feel the man.

In many case I'm sure it does and that's all there is. In many other cases it also feeds their ego in another more healthy way because they made the woman they're with happy. I work on the (actually selfish) principle, if they're sexually happy, they'll go out of their way to do the same for me. Plus in the pantheon of things I want my lover to stroke, my ego is way down the list:D

I have had this conversation with every guy i've been with, and they all said 'men love it when women moan because men love the feeling of power that they get'

Power? :eek: Jeeebus. ok.....

My ex asked me to be more vocal, and I said 'no if i'm not feeling it, i'm not doing it'. A) I'm NOT feeling that great and you want me to act like i'm feelin that great just so you can feel great. Not fair.

well yea.

Back on thread, i never fake and i really cant understand women who do. It just seems like the stupidest thing you could do.
1) He has come
2) You haven't come
3) You're telling him you like something he's doing that you don't, which will mean he will get the wrong idea and do it again
4) Why on earth can you not just say ' i won't come this time', if you can't come just tell them!

Agree on this point.

bennyblanco

Wibbs wrote: »

Well just maybe he gets upset, because she's not getting the full effect of love making and he feels bad about that. For her.

+1
Is that so hard to believe?
For me it's you're both getting really into eachother and turning eachother on more and more in a "holy sh1t this is deadly woah mmmmmmmmmmmmYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!!"
kind of way.I think it's technically like a feedback loop type deal but I think moaning sounds nicer.I hear her,which turns me on more which turns her on more which turns me on more which turns her on mo...well you get the picture.
Power doesnt really rank high

LolaLuv

I've faked it before, and I'm sure I will again. Sometimes I'm in the mood for sex but don't really feel like orgasming. With some dudes, no matter how many times you tell them that they won't relent. In those cases, I fake it. If the sex were repeatedly bad I'd do something to fix it, but for a once-off here and there I really don't see the problem.

who007

Does it really matter either way? Ye'll be at it again and again so everyone will end up satsified on more than one occasion. An orgasm isn't the be all and end all of sex anyway..

aoibhebree

Right.

We're "doin the dirty thing." He's being polite ... "ladies first". While I had been in the mood for sex, and he's doing everything right ... sometimes it just doesn't happen. What harm is there in faking one - which will only urge him on?! To be fair, with ladies (with me anyways) occasionally it's just not going to happen, through no fault of his own. So why make him feel bad about it?

masonman

Sleipnir wrote: »

AH, guys can fake too. How many of you check the evidence?

I have faked NOT having one..:D

lilminx

aoibhebree wrote: »

Right.

We're "doin the dirty thing." He's being polite ... "ladies first". While I had been in the mood for sex, and he's doing everything right ... sometimes it just doesn't happen. What harm is there in faking one - which will only urge him on?! To be fair, with ladies (with me anyways) occasionally it's just not going to happen, through no fault of his own. So why make him feel bad about it?

I've faked it... and i've kicked myself afterwards sometimes. I think it depends on the circumstances. Like with my current relationship i faked it once and then thought to myself, minx honestly - ya want a long term thing with this guy and if ya start doing the faking now - it's just as one poster put it 'negative enforcement'. I just put the time and effort into talking him through what made me get there.. and i've gotten there.. every single time...

I think what put the pressure on it was the first time was one of those mind-blowing, everything happened in the right order, I was so turned on to begin with, oh my god oh my buddah oh my krishna *i'm a non-denominational cummer*.. that the first time it wasn't that frantic.. i felt pressure to keep the aural support going.. but as I lay there going.. oh will ya just cum already... I realised I was doing both him and me a dis-service...

so after a little bit of 'that's good but if ya move to the left a little.. ohhhhhhhhh and now move away from there for a bit ahhhhhhhhhhh now it's better for both of us.. he knows when i moan it's cos he's doing something great... and he loves it... and so... do... I..

feck my fella living in Dublin!!! *sobs*

Crumble Froo

midlandsmissus wrote: »

That's not true Wibbs. Guys want women to moan, not primarily because they want US to feel good, it is because it makes THEM feel good when we moan. It strokes their ego, it makes them feel the man.

I have had this conversation with every guy i've been with, and they all said 'men love it when women moan because men love the feeling of power that they get' My ex asked me to be more vocal, and I said 'no if i'm not feeling it, i'm not doing it'. A) I'm NOT feeling that great and you want me to act like i'm feelin that great just so you can feel great. Not fair.

no way, im not buying that one. well, im gonna agree that it does happen, but strongly protest the generalisation of it being most guys. only guy i've been with who liked it for the ego/power element, was ... well... a manipulative, power-loving creep.

most of my partners that i've talked about this with have said that they enjoy the moaning as it's positive encouragement, that they're doing something right. though maybe im just lucky but most of those guys are the kind whose favourite bit of lovemaking is making the woman happy.


personally though, don't think i've ever faked it. certainly never while in a relationship.

Wibbs

aoibhebree wrote: »

Right.

We're "doin the dirty thing." He's being polite ... "ladies first". While I had been in the mood for sex, and he's doing everything right ... sometimes it just doesn't happen. What harm is there in faking one - which will only urge him on?! To be fair, with ladies (with me anyways) occasionally it's just not going to happen, through no fault of his own. So why make him feel bad about it?

TBH I can see why you would in this case.

K-9

aoibhebree wrote: »

Right.

We're "doin the dirty thing." He's being polite ... "ladies first". While I had been in the mood for sex, and he's doing everything right ... sometimes it just doesn't happen. What harm is there in faking one - which will only urge him on?! To be fair, with ladies (with me anyways) occasionally it's just not going to happen, through no fault of his own. So why make him feel bad about it?

I suppose a little white lie now and again is no harm.

Crumble Froo wrote: »

no way, im not buying that one. well, im gonna agree that it does happen, but strongly protest the generalisation of it being most guys. only guy i've been with who liked it for the ego/power element, was ... well... a manipulative, power-loving creep.

most of my partners that i've talked about this with have said that they enjoy the moaning as it's positive encouragement, that they're doing something right. though maybe im just lucky but most of those guys are the kind whose favourite bit of lovemaking is making the woman happy.


personally though, don't think i've ever faked it. certainly never while in a relationship.

Yep moaning would be positive feedback for most men and we like hearing and seeing a women getting pleasure.

It does flatter the ego too!

NewFrockTuesday

I had a thread up a while back about my nightmare (ex) housemate. One of the many many things she done to make life very uncomfortable was to be very loud in bed with her much older fat tinker boyfriend. Yep – I said tinker – it’s the only way to describe him. She used to moan so loudly it was cringeworthy and very obvious she was faking. Looking back now, I can see why he wouldn’t give a hoot as he was still getting his end (he was 43 she was 21), but for the other housemate and myself it was just awful having to listen to it and then when I mentioned it to her I was laughed at like a big joke and I honestly think that she took it as a compliment on her bedroom prowess that we were asking her to tone it down. It was like Debbie does Doneycarney every night from 3.30am onwards – he worked as “sekkurrity” (read big fat knacker bouncer on one of the roughest dives in town) at night and landed at the house every night @ 3.30am.

Worst 3 months ever.

OksanaLV

Deepsense wrote: »

I had a thread up a while back about my nightmare (ex) housemate. One of the many many things she done to make life very uncomfortable was to be very loud in bed with her much older fat tinker boyfriend. Yep – I said tinker – it’s the only way to describe him. She used to moan so loudly it was cringeworthy and very obvious she was faking. Looking back now, I can see why he wouldn’t give a hoot as he was still getting his end (he was 43 she was 21), but for the other housemate and myself it was just awful having to listen to it and then when I mentioned it to her I was laughed at like a big joke and I honestly think that she took it as a compliment on her bedroom prowess that we were asking her to tone it down. It was like Debbie does Doneycarney every night from 3.30am onwards – he worked as “sekkurrity” (read big fat knacker bouncer on one of the roughest dives in town) at night and landed at the house every night @ 3.30am.

Worst 3 months ever.

OMG! speaking of which. I once shared a house with a girl like that. He was Irish and she was from Sweden. Every night around 11pm both of them would come home. Half an hour later a big argument would break out and by 1am both of them would be having sex. She was loud, i mean really loud. It was like she was being tortured or something. This was on sync every night. You could time your clock by them down to the exact minute. After warning them to lower the volume, everything was quite for a couple of months. 2 months later they were at it again. One Wednesday morning about 2am they were at it again. I completley lost it. I grabbed the sweeping brush ran downstairs, kicked in their door, broke the brush off the headboard and screamed at them to shut up.

They left soon afterwards.

Partizan

OksanaLV wrote: »

OMG! speaking of which. I once shared a house with a girl like that. He was Irish and she was from Sweden. Every night around 11pm both of them would come home. Half an hour later a big argument would break out and by 1am both of them would be having sex. She was loud, i mean really loud. It was like she was being tortured or something. This was on sync every night. You could time your clock by them down to the exact minute. After warning them to lower the volume, everything was quite for a couple of months. 2 months later they were at it again. One Wednesday morning about 2am they were at it again. I completley lost it. I grabbed the sweeping brush ran downstairs, kicked in their door, broke the brush off the headboard and screamed at them to shut up.

They left soon afterwards.

Sweet Jesus :eek:

TheDollyParton

aoibhebree wrote: »

Right.

We're "doin the dirty thing." He's being polite ... "ladies first". While I had been in the mood for sex, and he's doing everything right ... sometimes it just doesn't happen. What harm is there in faking one - which will only urge him on?! To be fair, with ladies (with me anyways) occasionally it's just not going to happen, through no fault of his own. So why make him feel bad about it?

Totally, that was my reasoning in the past...I've faked it, I'm not proud of it, and I'm hoping not to do it again. I'm hoping that I can be little more honest and confident sexually in future relationships. Since I broke up with my ex a year and a half ago I'm a lot more sexually experienced and I'm optimistic about using what I've learned in future and being more direct about what I like and don't like...and I hope that if I'm having one of those "It's just not going to happen" moments, I'll just say, "It's not going to happen and it's not your fault. It's just not going to happen."

Princessa

My Oh thinks i fake it but i actually dont, im just tight and hes very well equiped so i can moan a tad loud sometimes. I wouldnt be bothered with all the faking ****, if i aint getting anything i just aint why lie to him?

Black Swan

scarymoon1 wrote: »

do many other girls do this?

Read awhile back about a Cosmos survey that concluded only 30 percent of women have theirs when with him on the average. It further suggested that many of the 70 percent that did without faked it to make him feel good about himself.

Didn't get to review the survey methodology or sampling techniques, so I am uncertain about the rigor of the survey in terms of validity, reliability, or representativeness. It could be error filled bias rubbish, then again, it would be pretty sad if there was any truth to it...

Nope, I'd feel ridiculous making all those noises! I'm sure he'd notice and then I'd feel really stupid. I prefer to be honest, it's easier overall imo.

Joey the lips

who007 wrote: »

Does it really matter either way? Ye'll be at it again and again so everyone will end up satsified on more than one occasion. An orgasm isn't the be all and end all of sex anyway..

Oh yes it is! Can think of anything better than after an hour of loving she ends and I end not necess together on a nice tender orgasm.:o

DubLass

Only ever faked it over the phone, soooooooo easy

panda100

Oh ya I've faked it,particularly with oral sex. Sometimes their trying so hard, god love 'em, and you want to make them feel good about all the hard work they've put in so you give a little moan and a satisfied sigh.

Most guys I've been with have known when Im faking it. I must just be a really bad actress!

Star Lord

midlandsmissus wrote: »

I have had this conversation with every guy i've been with, and they all said 'men love it when women moan because men love the feeling of power that they get'

Then they were either comparing notes or it was written above your headboard

I also think that you must keep going for the same kind of guy if this is the case, as I (and I believe most men) would rather it be honest, so that it could develop and get better as time goes on so that both parties are satisfied. And if it's just not happening, then it's just not happening, don't lie about it!

me_right_one

ntlbell wrote: »

What makes you think he would be offended?

Does he have delusions that he's don juan?

OF COURSE he'd be offended!!!!!!!! What makes you think a lad wouldnt?

shellyboo

me_right_one wrote: »

OF COURSE he'd be offended!!!!!!!! What makes you think a lad wouldnt?

A basic level of maturity?

Most men (note, MEN) know that sometimes it's just not happening for a girl and won't be offended. Anyway, it's not like it's a personal slight - "How dare you not be able to bring me to orgasm!! How rude!!"

Most often it's the girl who feels bad. If you're with a guy who knows what he's doing and it's not happening, it's just not happening. He's not going to get offended. If you're with a guy who doesn't know what he's doing, the LAST thing you should be doing is faking it - he's never going to learn what works in that case.

Dudess

scarymoon1 wrote: »

i only did it when i was tired and didn't want to offend him!

"You've offended me because you didn't come - and it's YOUR fault you didn't come so feel responsible dammit!" Sorry, I just don't see the logic...

miaowsky wrote: »

sometimes no matter what he does it wont happen, so i think it's better to fake in those situations, that said i do feel awful for faking

So you do something that makes you feel awful... to stop you feeling awful?

Wibbs wrote: »

Well just maybe he gets upset, because she's not getting the full effect of love making and he feels bad about that. For her.

I'm probably misreading you Wibbs but are you saying it would be better so for a woman to fake it in order to stop a guy from feeling upset that he hasn't turned her on enough?

bennyblanco wrote: »

+1
Is that so hard to believe?
For me it's you're both getting really into eachother and turning eachother on more and more in a "holy sh1t this is deadly woah mmmmmmmmmmmmYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!!"
kind of way.I think it's technically like a feedback loop type deal but I think moaning sounds nicer.I hear her,which turns me on more which turns her on more which turns me on more which turns her on mo...well you get the picture.
Power doesnt really rank high

So you wouldn't care if she was faking it as long as she moaned?

Partizan wrote: »

Sweet Jesus :eek:

The person who burst into the noisy couple's room to get them to shut the **** up seeing as they were keeping them awake? Not something I'd do but we all have our breaking point - fair play to that person for taking a stand against the inconsiderate *****.

Quality

Faking it, Is the worst thing you can ever do...

What ever about lying to him

But lying to YOURSELF??


You deserve better girl