Favorite Chat Up Lines..

Jesus Juice

Personally mine is ''Just get in the van''....70% of the time,it works all the time....

So Whats your favorite chat up line that you use to woo the opposite sex??

n1ck

Jesus Juice wrote: »

Personally mine is ''Just get in the van''....70% of the time,it works all the time....

So Whats your favorite chat up line that you use to woo the opposite sex??

What?

donmeister

n1ck wrote: »

What?

Anchorman Quote?

Its actually 60% of the time.....

Jesus Juice

donmeister wrote: »

Anchorman Quote?

Its actually 60% of the time.....

I fuckin' knew it...i changed it about 5 times trying to decide!!

jon burrows

My face or yours!!

Bluebluesky

Lol - Well fellas beat this. I was in a well known Dublin bar last Saturday night. A guy stopped me and asked me if I had a seat. I said yes and he asked me would I give it to him as he was tired of standing - AND THEY SAY ROMANCE IS DEAD!!!

Piste

Haha that guy is my hero. I don't have any lines because I don't chat up strangers. I actually don't approach strangers unless I'm looking for directions or they're working in a shop.

Bluebluesky

I know the guy is a legend! I was actually so shocked that I think I for a mili second was actually into him....women are nuts lol

Overature

have you seen the back seat of a 98 corolla

Bluebluesky

I don't believe I have ever even been in a Corolla - but I can tell that you are about to hit me with a real charmer....

sock puppet

Bluebluesky wrote: »

Lol - Well fellas beat this. I was in a well known Dublin bar last Saturday night. A guy stopped me and asked me if I had a seat. I said yes and he asked me would I give it to him as he was tired of standing - AND THEY SAY ROMANCE IS DEAD!!!

Haha that guy's a legend. Personally I'm too cool for chat up lines. I'm also afraid of women:(

Bluebluesky

Too cool for chat up lines That guy was brave I will give him that

RHRN

"You'll do" (Foolproof :cool:)

*Hold out your sleeve* "Feel that material. Do you know what that material is? Boyfriend material."

Then if you get rejected:
"Lower your standards. I did."
Or if she says:
" No. I have standards" you say " I don't. Thats why I asked you"

Bluebluesky

RHRN wrote: »

"You'll do" (Foolproof :cool:)

*Hold out your sleeve* "Feel that material. Do you know what that material is? Boyfriend material."

Then if you get rejected:
"Lower your standards. I did."
Or if she says:
" No. I have standards" you say " I don't. Thats why I asked you"

Lol - You'll do - Too funny!

They are great - I like them

GalwayKiefer

RHRN wrote: »

*Hold out your sleeve* "Feel that material. Do you know what that material is? Boyfriend material."

Brilliant

Strictly for a joke I used this once: "I may not be the best looking guy in the club...but I'm the only one talking to you."

Bluebluesky

Again all good stuff here ...

"I may not be the best looking guy in the club...but I'm the only one talking to you." - Am actually going to give this one to my male friends to use!

callaway92

Do you spit or swallow

ciaranmul

Are ya on the pill?

Bluebluesky

callaway92 wrote: »

Do you spiut or swallow

ciaranmul wrote: »

Are ya on the pill?

It's spit not spiut moron

2 charming individuals!

MikeStrutington

"Do you wanna head back to mine? We can do this the easy way or the me-f'ucking-your-decapitated-head-in-the-ear way"

callaway92

Bluebluesky wrote: »

It's spit not spiut moron

2 charming individuals!

Reported

Bluebluesky

I'm reported????

aoibhebree

Me: All we need here is a six foot penguin
Him: ... why??
Me: To break the ice!!

Love it

Bluebluesky

MikeStrutington wrote: »

"Do you wanna head back to mine? We can do this the easy way or the me-f'ucking-your-decapitated-head-in-the-ear way"

bet u get lucky with the ladies all the time....lol

MikeStrutington

Bluebluesky wrote: »

bet u get lucky with the ladies all the time....lol

Not so much lucky as brought to court

Bluebluesky

Nice work my friend - lol

callaway92

Bluebluesky wrote: »

I'm reported????

Ya for calling me a moron..:cool:

MikeStrutington

Bluebluesky wrote: »

Nice work my friend - lol

F'uckin tellin ya!

Bluebluesky

callaway92 wrote: »

Ya for calling me a moron..:cool:

Maybe I should have said WANKER!

The single greatest chat up line ever: 'Are you from Jamaica? 'Cos Jamaican me crazy!'.

Piste

Bluebluesky wrote: »

Maybe I should have said WANKER!

Or maybe you should have said nothing at all and y'know. not got that there infraction. If you go around abusing other members you're going to earn yourself a banning.

illiop

aoibhebree wrote: »

Me: All we need here is a six foot penguin
Him: ... why??
Me: To break the ice!!

Love it

The better version of this is when you radomly shout "FAT PENGUIN!!" at someone...then explain what your acutally at.

There's also the good auld: "Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven?" <- You can be sure he's a keeper:cool:

Insect Overlord

"Did you know that the distance from here *puts hand on right shoulder* to here
*puts hand on middle of back* is the exact same as the distance from here *tap middle of back again* to here *move closer and put hand on other shoulder*"

Aisling(",)

An File wrote: »

"Did you know that the distance from here *puts hand on right shoulder* to here
*puts hand on middle of back* is the exact same as the distance from here *tap middle of back again* to here *move closer and put hand on other shoulder*"

i love that one
another of the same type:
if you were a pirate would you wear your parrot on this shoulder*touch closest one* or this one *the other one.*

Insect Overlord

Aisling(",) wrote: »

i love that one
another of the same type:
if you were a pirate would you wear your parrot on this shoulder*touch closest one* or this one *the other one.*

Quality!

One of my college buddies came out with an absolute gem yesterday:

"Would ya like to go halves on a ba$tard?"

D4RK ONION

I preferred
"I have some terrible news, my cock died, can I bury it in your ass"

Crude yet effective

Insect Overlord

Did the guy who said that end up winning that competition?

D4RK ONION

I believe he did... Are we allowed to discuss such things here?

Insect Overlord

Not really... Off-topic discussion goes here.

Now, more chat-up lines!

"Do you come here often?"

D4RK ONION

Or, my personal favourite...

*points to woman's crotch*
Do you cum here often?

(that's my own creation, use at your own risk)

Crumble Froo

Ginja Ninja

use at your own risk:

but for a laugh one of the lads tried

""i've got a knife and an erection,lets not turn this rape into a murder""

he was nearly sure she'd get him arrested for that

aoibhebree

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat slut.



Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: There's no need to get on your knees and suck on my cock just yet



Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and Ill go to mine.
Man: That's cool, cause after I'm done shagging you in the back of my
car, I don't give a **** where you go.



Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: That explains the moustache then!




Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilised.
Man: No problem, Ill just shoot my load up your arse.



Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is
impossible to shake off once you've been shagged.



Man: Would you like to dance?
Woman: Id rather eat glass.
Man: I think you misheard me. I said you look fat in those pants.



Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Fortunately, somewhere else.
Man: Just as well cos I've been shagging your mum while your dad watches.


Man: You're pretty
Woman: Piss off.
Man: Don't interrupt, You're pretty... ugly, you fat bitch.


Man:did it hurt?
Woman:what?when i fell from heaven??
Man:no,when you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch along the way!

Rozabeez

"I like your hair, lets score somewhere the Canadian can't see."

That one worked, high fives!

Aisling(",)

nice legs what time do they open

hows your belly for a lodger

and my personal favourite up for a fcuk?:rolleyes:

c4cat

Excuse me, would you hold it against me if I just told you that you got a fantastic looking body?

Which ever she/answers your in

GalwayKiefer

Aisling(",) wrote: »

up for a fcuk?

I have actually heard this being used on a female friend of mine in Ennis, she was so stunned (he was being serious) that all she could mumble was "Eh, no thank you." I stood there crying laughing as the guy then turned around to one of her friends and repeated his poetry.

Back on topic,
I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into the cheap hotel around the corner.

My name is milk, and I wanna do your body good!

*reaches over and checks jacket/top tag/label*
Girl: What the hell are you doing?
Guy: I just wanted to see if all angels were made in Heaven. :cool:

tolosenc

I wish I was your derivative...

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

cautioner

For 17-year-olds only:

I HAVE A CAR I CAN BUY YOU DRINK I HAVE A CAR.

Piste

cautioner wrote: »

For 17-year-olds only:

I HAVE A CAR I CAN BUY YOU DRINK I HAVE A CAR.

*swoon*

Synods

And for the mathematic fanatics......

Are you the square root of two? Cos your makin me irrational.....