Beyonce's new song "if i were a boy"

120_Minutes · 22-01-2009 12:26pm #1

...doesnt contain the lyric " I'd pi$$ standing up"

I was dissapointed.

Discuss.

oh and following the trend of all my AH threads

IBTL

banshee_bones · 22-01-2009 12:27pm

hardly a "new" song, iv been hearing that around since before christmas!

really dislike the song so couldnt care less about whats in or not in the lyrics!

120_Minutes · 22-01-2009 12:29pm

tis new to me as i dont listen to ****e. just caught it on the radio this morning.

MagicMarker · 22-01-2009 12:31pm

If she were a boy I'd still roide the arse off her.

Beyonce FTW.

Jesus Wept · 22-01-2009 12:34pm

Pissing standing up is overrated.

tbh · 22-01-2009 12:35pm

Meatloafs new song says he'd do anything for love, but he wouldn't do that. However, he neglects to tell us what "that" is. It's one rule for faded rock stars and another for the rest of us.

MagicMarker · 22-01-2009 12:35pm

The-Rigger wrote: »

Pissing standing up is overrated.

Depends on what you're standing on.

Gillo · 22-01-2009 12:39pm

Thats because most Americans on account of having an illicit relationship with food now have a bastard lovechild called obesity, as a result their haven't seen wee willy winky for years. It's easier for them to just sit and pi$$.

Brian · 22-01-2009 12:40pm

Props for use of the subjunctive.
Beyonce ++

coconut5 · 22-01-2009 12:46pm

tbh wrote: »

Meatloafs new song says he'd do anything for love, but he wouldn't do that. However, he neglects to tell us what "that" is. It's one rule for faded rock stars and another for the rest of us.

Actually, he explained that. The lyric is: 'But I'll never forget the way you feel right now, oh no, no way, and I would do anything for love but I won't do that."

Mossy Monk · 22-01-2009 12:46pm

New song?

Ass · 22-01-2009 12:46pm

The-Rigger wrote: »

Pissing standing up is overrated.

Say that when you're miles away from the nearest toilet and you have to hover above the ground magically and you can't shake.

I feel bad for women who need to take a piss. At least they're fearless when it comes to taking a shit in a public toilet. Then again, women probably don't piss on the seat.

funk-you · 22-01-2009 12:47pm

Dear miss Beyonce (if that is your real name),

We get it, men suck...oh oh oh oh oh oh oh. We really regret it and should have married you oh oh oh oh oh oh. Life just isn't that tough for us as it is for the average bunny boiler oh oh oh oh oh oh...high pitched vocal riff...bum wiggle.

Sincerely,

Manbastards.

Turd Ferguson · 22-01-2009 12:56pm

I heard Michael Jackson wants to cover the song

Mint Sauce · 22-01-2009 12:59pm

funk-you wrote: »

Dear miss Beyonce (if that is your real name),

We get it, men suck...oh oh oh oh oh oh oh. We really regret it and should have married you oh oh oh oh oh oh. Life just isn't that tough for us as it is for the average bunny boiler oh oh oh oh oh oh...high pitched vocal riff...bum wiggle.

Sincerely,

Manbastards.

still would though

speedboatchase · 22-01-2009 1:01pm

Meatloaf won't let you **** on his chest, not even for love

Dragan · 22-01-2009 1:01pm

MagicMarker wrote: »

If she were a boy I'd still roide the arse off her.

Beyonce FTW.

Ah come off it, she's fugly.
:pac:

It should contain the line

"If i were a boy, then Jay Z would have to be openly ghey".

This post is sponsored by Nas.

Biggins · 22-01-2009 1:02pm

Beyonce sucks big time. Over-rated and hyped up by the PR industry.

funk-you · 22-01-2009 1:06pm

irish-stew wrote: »

still would though

Really, really wouldn't.

-Funk

Dudess · 22-01-2009 1:10pm

funk-you wrote: »

Dear miss Beyonce (if that is your real name),

We get it, men suck...oh oh oh oh oh oh oh. We really regret it and should have married you oh oh oh oh oh oh. Life just isn't that tough for us as it is for the average bunny boiler oh oh oh oh oh oh...high pitched vocal riff...bum wiggle.

Sincerely,

Manbastards.

Agreed. If I may be serious for a moment, that song is utterly reprehensible sexist, misandrist drivel.

She's hot though. Even if she's not someone's type that hardly makes her ugly...

Dragan · 22-01-2009 1:18pm

Dudess wrote: »

Even if she's not someone's type that hardly makes her ugly...

I disagree, two people that i genuinely find so unattractive that i consider them to be ugly are her and Jennifer Lopez.

Just something about them i want to slap.

Biggins · 22-01-2009 1:23pm

Dragan wrote: »

I disagree, two people that i genuinely find so unattractive that i consider them to be ugly are her and Jennifer Lopez.

Just something about them i want to slap.

Add Mariah Carey to that list.

MagicMarker · 22-01-2009 1:23pm

Dragan wrote: »

Just something about them i want to slap.

I hear ya

winston82 · 22-01-2009 1:25pm

So if beyone was naked in front of you, you would still think she was fugly and wouldn't roide her? I doubt that. They only thing i'd slap would be her arse..

Dragan · 22-01-2009 1:30pm

winston82 wrote: »

So if beyone was naked in front of you, you would still think she was fugly and wouldn't roide her? I doubt that. They only thing i'd slap would be her arse..

Oh right, now i get it. When someone that i consider ugly is naked, because they are naked and female i am supposed to think they are hot?

Or is it that i am supposed to think they are hot because you do?

If i found either of them in front of me nekkid i would assume two things.

1) I'm having a nightmare, better dream me up an axe and get to work.
or
2) I am having a really bad trip, a few less micrograms next time!

Dudess · 22-01-2009 1:32pm

Dragan wrote: »

Oh right, now i get it. When someone that i consider ugly is naked, because they are naked and female i am supposed to think they are hot?

Agreed. I think it's refreshing when guys don't drool over the usual generic suspects.
At the same time though, I've no time for people saying "so and so is pug-ugly" as if it's a definitive statement, just because they don't personally fancy them. Not directing that at you, Dragan, just saying it general.

winston82 · 22-01-2009 1:38pm

Dragan wrote: »

Oh right, now i get it. When someone that i consider ugly is naked, because they are naked and female i am supposed to think they are hot?

Or is it that i am supposed to think they are hot because you do?

If i found either of them in front of me nekkid i would assume two things.

1) I'm having a nightmare, better dream me up an axe and get to work.
or
2) I am having a really bad trip, a few less micrograms next time!

So you're more of a roseanne kinda person? :rolleyes: the more arm fat the better eh...!!

Earthhorse · 22-01-2009 1:38pm

Look, this thread is getting really confusing with Dragan and Dudess posting back and forth.

Dragan wrote: »

Ah come off it, she's fugly.
:pac:

It should contain the line

"If i were a boy, then Jay Z would have to be openly ghey".

This post is sponsored by Nas.

Like, I was thinking, how does Dudess know who Nas is? Isn't she the mod of Alternative/Indie?

Biggins · 22-01-2009 1:38pm

winston82 wrote: »

So if beyone was naked in front of you, you would still think she was fugly and wouldn't roide her? I doubt that. They only thing i'd slap would be her arse..

Nope, wouldn't touch her with a barge pole as the saying goes.

Give me someone like Katie Melua who can actually sing, pick up an instrument and entertain people for hours on end - without having strip an show body parts, shake her ass and other things besides actually displaying real talent!

American over-hyped talentless twats, the lot of them. Useless dumbed down brain fodder for the masses.

MagicMarker · 22-01-2009 1:41pm

Biggins wrote: »

Nope, wouldn't touch her with a barge pole as the saying goes.

Give me someone like Katie Melua who can actually sing, pick up an instrument and entertain people for hours on end - without having strip an show body parts, shake her ass and other things besides actually displaying real talent!

American over-hyped talentless twats, the lot of them. Useless dumbed down brain fodder for the masses.

I'm not a fan of Beyonce's music, but if you think she can't sing then you've clearly never heard her before.

''Popular'' doesn't necessarily mean ''talentless''.

JC 2K3 · 22-01-2009 1:41pm

Baza210 wrote: »

Props for use of the subjunctive.
Beyonce ++

Props for use of postincrement.

Dudess · 22-01-2009 1:41pm

winston82 wrote: »

So you're more of a roseanne kinda person? :rolleyes: the more arm fat the better eh...!!

LOL
Sure... he doesn't fancy Beyonce or Jennifer Lopez so that MUST mean he fancies Rosanne...

winston82 · 22-01-2009 1:44pm

Biggins wrote: »

Nope, wouldn't touch her with a barge pole as the saying goes.

Give me someone like Katie Melua who can actually sing, pick up an instrument and entertain people for hours on end - without having strip an show body parts, shake her ass and other things besides actually displaying real talent!

American over-hyped talentless twats, the lot of them. Useless dumbed down brain fodder for the masses.

So talent is a factor? if Katie Melua couldn't sing, dance or play an instrument she wouldn't get to touch off your barge pole?

Biggins · 22-01-2009 1:44pm

MagicMarker wrote: »

I'm not a fan of Beyonce's music, but if you think she can't sing then you've clearly never heard her before.

''Popular'' doesn't necessarily mean ''talentless''.

I've heard her sing and once I heard her (multiple times - against my will) I came to the same conclusion as before. She's a one trick pony.
Every subsequent song just ends up boring and flatless.

Dudess · 22-01-2009 1:47pm

Doesn't mean she can't sing. She has a fantastic voice.

Dante · 22-01-2009 1:49pm

120_Minutes wrote: »

Beyonce's new song "if i were a boy

How in ****s name can you call this song new....?
its been out about 4/5 months....unless you live in a cave.

Biggins · 22-01-2009 1:51pm

winston82 wrote: »

So talent is a factor? if Katie Melua couldn't sing, dance or play an instrument she would get to touch off your barge pole?

Well, to be honest, if I am going to pay a large amount of hard earned cash for concert tickets, I at least want to see natural musical talent, not natural skin and bones!
If I wanted to see something in a skimpy outfit shaking it's ass at me, I'd go to a genuine strip bar. Not go to a politically correct lesser show with a one trick pony prancing about on a stage so that some can get their sexual kicks.

As for Katie Melua touching my barge pole - that don't enter the equation.
I regard talent as a skill - not because I get a turn on just from seeing her.

Dragan · 22-01-2009 1:56pm

winston82 wrote: »

So you're more of a roseanne kinda person? :rolleyes: the more arm fat the better eh...!!

Well now, thats just a fantastic leap of logic there Watson, it really is.

I would be more of a Monica Belluci, Framke Jansen kind of guy myself.

But no, you are right, because i don't like two of the same women as you then i must like all the women you don't. You sir, are some kind of idiot savaunt, i swear.

@ Dudess, whilst i understand where you are coming from Dudess the simple fact of the matter is the pictures of them would be avoided, if they were ( hypothetically as i don't watch it ) on the tv i would switch it over. I find them past the point of not being attractive and towards the point of being a turn off, hence i consider them to be ugly in my opinion, the same way as i am sure I am ugly in the opinion of a fair few people. Just the way life is, i don't need to sit here and tow the line of "everyone is beautiful" because not everybody is.

As for his voice, it's ****ing fantastic and the singer in me wishes to god she would start working with some decent producers and writers.

winston82 · 22-01-2009 1:59pm

Dragan wrote: »

Well now, thats just a fantastic leap of logic there Watson, it really is.

I would be more of a Monica Belluci, Framke Jansen kind of guy myself.

But no, you are right, because i don't like two of the same women as you then i must like all the women you don't. You sir, are some kind of idiot savaunt, i swear.

@ Dudess, whilst i understand where you are coming from Dudess the simple fact of the matter is the pictures of them would be avoided, if they were ( hypothetically as i don't watch it ) on the tv i would switch it over. I find them past the point of not being attractive and towards the point of being a turn off, hence i consider them to be ugly in my opinion, the same way as i am sure I am ugly in the opinion of a fair few people. Just the way life is, i don't need to sit here and tow the line of "everyone is beautiful" because not everybody is.

As for his voice, it's ****ing fantastic and the singer in me wishes to god she would start working with some decent producers and writers.

WOW, i think you might need to chill a bit buddy. This is AH so was just having a bit of fun. A classic case of 'roid rage is the diagnosis here, my dear watson...:p

Adamcp898 · 22-01-2009 2:00pm

New song??

Earthhorse · 22-01-2009 2:01pm

Dragan wrote: »

Well now, thats just a fantastic leap of logic there Watson, it really is.

No, his name is winston. There really should be some rule about members of boards having to start their name with a unique letter.

Earthhorse · 22-01-2009 2:02pm

winston82 wrote: »

A classic case of 'roid rage is the diagnosis here, my dear watson...:p

No, his name is Dragan. Jesus, this thread.

MagicMarker · 22-01-2009 2:02pm

Adamcp898 wrote: »

New song??

Yes we get it, it's not really a new song.

Dragan · 22-01-2009 2:06pm

winston82 wrote: »

WOW, i think you might need to chill a bit buddy. This is AH so was just having a bit of fun. A classic case of 'roid rage is the diagnosis here, my dear watson...:p

Nope, roid rage is when i don't respond at all because i have thrown my laptop through the window, stipped to my undies and the followed it out to hunt for human flesh.

As for the whole "It's not new song" thing, i hadn't even heard of it. The whole not listening to the radio or watching MTV to protect myself from terrible music thing i guess.

So, like Charles Manson says* "If i haven't seen it, it's new to me!"

* in Family Guy

SoWatchaWant · 22-01-2009 2:12pm

Yep, Beyoncé's song is sexist drivel, and the same thing directed at women would not be tolerated, and rightly so. Not that the song bothers me, it says more about Beyoncé than it does about men.

winston82 · 22-01-2009 2:14pm

so the thread title should be 'Beyonce's 3 month and 14 day old song "if i were a boy"?

Loomis · 22-01-2009 2:43pm

tbh wrote: »

Meatloafs new song says he'd do anything for love, but he wouldn't do that. However, he neglects to tell us what "that" is. It's one rule for faded rock stars and another for the rest of us.

"After a while you'll forget everything
It was a brief interlude and a midsummer night's fling
And you'll see that it's time to move on
I won't do that! no i won't do that!"

"I know the territory, i've been around
It'll all turn to dust and we'll all fall down
And sooner or later, you'll be screwing around
I won't do that! no i won't do that!"

That is all. I care not for Beyonce's 'new' song.

Insect Overlord · 22-01-2009 5:10pm

You know what's worse than Beyonce's "If I Were A Boy"?
Beyonce's "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)".

They make me want to tear down radio stations with my bare hands.

Dudess · 22-01-2009 5:19pm

Dragan wrote: »

@ Dudess, whilst i understand where you are coming from Dudess the simple fact of the matter is the pictures of them would be avoided, if they were ( hypothetically as i don't watch it ) on the tv i would switch it over. I find them past the point of not being attractive and towards the point of being a turn off, hence i consider them to be ugly in my opinion, the same way as i am sure I am ugly in the opinion of a fair few people. Just the way life is, i don't need to sit here and tow the line of "everyone is beautiful" because not everybody is.

No no, that's not what I'm saying - my comment wasn't directed at you specifically anyway. What I mean is, if a person finds someone unattractive then they find them unattractive. If they find them ugly, then that's their personal view. However, some people seem to think their view on attractiveness/unattractiveness is the definitive one - that if they personally find, e.g. Katie Holmes ugly then that means she's definitely ugly, no two ways about it. But it's subjective.

I don't go by the cliché that "everyone is beautiful" either but I do think most of the time beauty or ugliness is subjective... and occasionally there are times when both are objective.

Jumpy · 22-01-2009 5:21pm

Pfft, what a 'heartbreaking' piece of trash. If she really wanted to be a boy then I would explain exactly how difficult it is to take a dump with morning woody.

Is she trying to say being a man/boy/manboy is easy? For Shaaaaame.

Earthhorse · 22-01-2009 5:22pm

Dudess wrote: »

No no, that's not what I'm saying - my comment wasn't directed at you specifically anyway. What I mean is, if a person finds someone unattractive then they find them unattractive. If they find them ugly, then that's their personal view. However, some people seem to think their view on attractiveness/unattractiveness is the definitive one - that if they personally find, e.g. Katie Holmes ugly then that means she's definitely ugly, no two ways about it. But it's subjective.

I don't go by the cliché that "everyone is beautiful" either but I do think most of the time beauty or ugliness is subjective... and occasionally there are times when both are objective.

Eh, why are you arguing with yourself?

Beyonce's new song "if i were a boy"

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