WAR between scientists!

Trance

1) Physicists/Mathmaticians
2) Chemists
3) Biologists
4) Computer Scientists

At a massive and worldwide televised conference for scientists, a discussion about which science has been the most beneficial to mankind becomes volatile. An arguement breaks out and as a result, 7 scientists are shot live on air. This causes uproar in the scientific community and a full scale global war erupts.
Which group ultimately would reign victorious, wiping out all who appose them?

I believe it's the physicists. We would control all heavy weapons and machinery. We have nukes at our disposal and satellites to spy on our enemies. The biologists would get completely wiped out, erradicated and squashed. They'd have absolutely no way of retaliating.

Trance

Trance wrote: »

The biologists would get completely wiped out, erradicated and squashed. They'd have absolutely no way of retaliating.[/COLOR]

Biological weapons?

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

surely mathematicians could just divide by zero, ultimate suicide bomb.

Creature

Chemists. Every good chemist carries a vial of hydrogen cyanide for situation such as this.

sunnyjim

Creature you imbecile, we're hardly gonna kill of them pesky number crunchers by topping ourselves :mad:

I think the physicists have us on this, what with the lasers and the nuclear bombs and the gloyvan! We'll let them think they've won - and we'll be underground, with our hands waiting to turn the valves so that tons of nerve gases are released into the atmhosphere...

MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Morbert

Trance wrote: »

I believe it's the physicists. We would control all heavy weapons and machinery. We have nukes at our disposal and satellites to spy on our enemies. The biologists would get completely wiped out, erradicated and squashed. They'd have absolutely no way of retaliating.

To fire the missiles, we'd need some sort of guidance system software.

hobochris

Morbert wrote: »

To fire the missiles, we'd need some sort of guidance system software.

sounds like a possible alliance between the Physicists & the computer scientists...the plot thickens

hobochris

hobochris wrote: »

sounds like a possible alliance between the Physicists & the computer scientists...the plot thickens

What about fuel for the rock propulsion? Chemists may need to be involved too...

amen

Physicists would win of course

all the other sciences can be explained in terms of physics/maths and in fact they couldn't do their job without our breakthroughs.

Of course the physicists/maths might have to have a war afterwards!

KnifeWRENCH

Boring answer: They're all interdependent and of equal importance.

Boards answer: Physics = Win.

Overheal

computer geeks would google everyone else's work and put it together like some twisted chimera of a doomsday weapon. Or simply program skynet and laugh from a bunker somewhere.

tenacious-me

Biological sciences!

Bioweapons-Microbiology
super soldier army-genetics
Chemi-bio weapons(Ricin)&(VX Gas)- Biochemistry
Etc...

Akrasia

Trance wrote: »

1) Physicists/Mathmaticians
2) Chemists
3) Biologists
4) Computer Scientists

At a massive and worldwide televised conference for scientists, a discussion about which science has been the most beneficial to mankind becomes volatile. An arguement breaks out and as a result, 7 scientists are shot live on air. This causes uproar in the scientific community and a full scale global war erupts.
Which group ultimately would reign victorious, wiping out all who appose them?

I believe it's the physicists. We would control all heavy weapons and machinery. We have nukes at our disposal and satellites to spy on our enemies. The biologists would get completely wiped out, erradicated and squashed. They'd have absolutely no way of retaliating.

nuclear weapons would be useless in this kind of conflict as they are too indiscriminate. Biologists could potentially develop a kind of virus that could attack the higher mathematical function of the brain (but they would have to have been planning this war in secret for years to develop that kind of technology)

Manach

The Geologists would win of course, with the secret army of cloned dinosaurs. Did ye not see Jurassic Park?

taram

Manach wrote: »

The Geologists would win of course, with the secret army of cloned dinosaurs. Did ye not see Jurassic Park?

Ah but that'll be mostly biology, which will ultimately conqueur all. (Mwhahaha) Naturally :P biologists have a plethora of weapons at their disposal, we'll just withhold food, medicine and alcohol, maybe even sex if we can get some anti-viagra genetically modified into your food :P

Capt'n Midnight

taram wrote: »

we can get some anti-viagra genetically modified into your food :P

It already exists. It's called wedding cake.

Futurism

Can't everyone just get on?

Capt'n Midnight

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/cuttlefish.png


Unless the CS students finish the robot revolution before you finish the cephalopod one.

tatabubbly

I reckon phyicists or chemists.... crush the biologists like flies...

If there was a war, computer scientists would freak out... there'd be no electricity to turn on the computer....

velocirafter

tatabubbly wrote: »

I reckon phyicists or chemists.... crush the biologists like flies...

If there was a war, computer scientists would freak out... there'd be no electricity to turn on the computer....

I think you're on to something, the computer scientists are too relient on infastructure, with a few targeted hits from the physicists they could take out the electric grid and the internet.... but if the computer scientists were clever enough they would have taken a copy of Wikipedia before the physicists had time to strike....their retaliation would rely on their ability to absord relevant information and adapt to new forms of non technological warfare, but I think it's too much to ask.


The biologists haven't a chance against the chemists, they'll be trying to evolve some giant fly trapper plants while the world is crumbling around them. The chemists should be able to throw some cyanide/chloroform/napalm together and wipe them out before breakfast.


So the final stage.....we can assume at this stage that most infrastructure, technological and physical, has been destroyed or severly damaged. The physicists should have been able to construct some crude but effective medievil style weapons, crossbows, catapults and that sort of thing.
The only chance I can see for the chemists is if they can get some guys in behind enemy lines and poison some prominent figures in the physics movement. They have no way of deploying a chemical weapon to cause widespead damage so if they get into a fistfight the physicists have them by the balls.


In summary I think the physicists would win

Capt'n Midnight

tatabubbly wrote: »

I reckon phyicists or chemists.... crush the biologists like flies...

If there was a war, computer scientists would freak out... there'd be no electricity to turn on the computer....

UPS FTW

Technician 1: Wat a minute! We can just shut off the power!
Technician 2: No such luck. It's solar powered.
Technician 1: [disgusted] Solar power. When will people learn?

Capt'n Midnight

velocirafter wrote:

The chemists should be able to throw some cyanide/chloroform/napalm together and wipe them out before breakfast.D

Aren't you forgetting about Pneumonic plague ?

Of course throwing bees nests at people so the bears will go for the honey

velocirafter

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Aren't you forgetting about Pneumonic plague ?

Of course throwing bees nests at people so the bears will go for the honey

If they release a plague they will wipe themselves out aswell, it'll will take far too long to engineer it to infect only people who studied physics/chemistry/computer science. In the mean time the chemists could have slipped some LSD into their cornflakes.

Capt'n Midnight

no engineering needed it's natural ,
all they need is a vaccination OR they can just infect everyone and only treat themselves.

IrishKnight

Biological FTW...

How do you think H1N1 came about?! :P

thebouldwhacker

As an ex-chemist I am confident us lab rats would win...(can one become an ex-chemist, or a non-practicing chemist, perhaps lapsed chemist???) we know how to melt your flesh off just using everyday house hold products. All we would need to do is for each of us to hide in a kitchen press of our chosen enemy and when they open the said press and reach in for a tasty snack BOOM your a bio stain in your own home. Victory would be swift.

Fluffybums

Biologists: transfect some bacteria with a sequence for some deadly toxin (which has an antidote) and the codes to allow expression. Transfect some other bugs to express the antidote. The basic chemistry required to extract the antidote would be well within the capabilities of most biologists. Provide the antidote to the biologists and release the toxic bugs voila!

Of course, the bilogists would be making use of their chemistry, physics and computer science capabilities so I guess the question is moot:o.

jumpguy

I'm gonna stick up for biologists here! Biologists can use diseases and genetical engineering (imagine giant attack suicide monkeys invading a city - you are F**CKED). Or super-soldiers.... Biologists also have lethal disease attacks. If anthrax was released, it was devastate everywhere and render cities and countrysides uninhabital for decades. Best of all, there is no chance of it spreading to your country (unless your backstabbed by a fellow biologist).

A physicist can only use nukes and heavy armoury, all of which have a defence - missile shields, heavy, heavy-duty bunkers. It's just conventional war really.

dfx-

Chemists. One big vat of HF poured over physicists and their pesky instruments & the biologists and computer engineers would see sense and run:cool:

HF rulez :pac:

the_syco

By Computer Scientists, you mean hackers, yes?

JC 2K3

Lol. Computer Scientists, easily.

How are the Physicists, Chemists or Biologists going to fight when the computers controlling their nukes, satellites, biological weapons, chemical weapons etc. have all been taken down - or used against them?

Computers are far, far too pervasive for there to be any other outcome.