Staying Safe

Nevyn

I have been accosted and attacked by more men over the years then women.
So your statics fail.

Thoie

I'm with Thaedydal.

Gauge

JaneyMc wrote: »

I usually just carry my keys in my hand and have the pointy bits sticking throught the my fingers. Makes me fell a little safer.

My Mam always told me, if anything ever happens, boot them as hard as possible in the nads, when they go to grab themselves in pain, jab them in the eyeballs, then run like hell.

This, I've been told that the two most effective weapons you can have on you are a) a set of keys and b) your thumbs.

WindSock

I was accidently kicked in the fanny once, it hurt like hell.

Sangre

Weird the way most men would never take these precautions despite being much more likely to be subject to a violent (or any) crime. Obviously they are less likely to be the subject of sexual crimes though.

Thoie

Sangre wrote: »

Weird the way most men would never take these precautions despite being much more likely to be subject to a violent (or any) crime. Obviously they are less likely to be the subject of sexual crimes though.

Maybe that's why men get picked on more?

Also, women don't generally learn a code of "fighting fair" in the playground, so we're generally much happier to go for the nose, land blows wherever we can reach, use keys...

FruitLover

Thoie wrote: »

If you absolutely feel you must punch someone, use your elbow, not your fist.

Use your palm heel if you can, rather than your elbow. Elbows require close contact. Also, if you have sharp nails, use 'em (eyes).

Popinjay wrote: »

The KravMaga course is pretty damn good but pricey for a one weekend jobby.

You might be thinking of the rip-off course in i]martial arts training centre which can not be named on these boards due to legal threats[/i. There are a few KM guys on the SD/MA board who can probably suggest somewhere which is better value. As physical SD goes, KM is very good IMO.

dotsman wrote: »

I'd just like to point out the blatant sexism of everybody's (well, at least most people's) posts.

You all seem to assume you're going to be attacked by a bloke!

I would estimate that serious assaults are far more likely to be committed by men.

Nevyn

Sangre wrote: »

Weird the way most men would never take these precautions despite being much more likely to be subject to a violent (or any) crime. Obviously they are less likely to be the subject of sexual crimes though.

Cos generally speaking boys/men are meant to be strong/capable enough to look after themselves if they end up in a physical altercation and generally speaking if a woman ends up in a physical altercation with a man she is out done when it comes to strenght/muscles.

Which is why male victim of assalt and rape have a harder time coming forward cos men are ment to be able to look after themsevles and sure wimmin are delicate lil flowers....:rolleyes:

I think everyone should be 'aware' on a night out, best way out of a fight or physical altercation is to see it brewing and get out of the way.

Pen1987

*hasnt read the thread*

*dies laughing at the idea that a number of salt satches would be of use in defending yourself* "just wait a minute there Mr.Attacker while I tear these and pour them neatly into my palm so I can throw them in your eyes."

GirlInterrupted

I always reverse into a parking space so that I can get away cleanly if I'm in a situation in a car park. Multi storeys in particular seem very ominious at night..

Other than that, I avoid walking alone late, and I always have a trusted means of getting home planned and organised. The fact that I'm only an occasional drinker means I'm usually the designated driver anyway.

Nevyn

Gauge wrote: »

This, I've been told that the two most effective weapons you can have on you are a) a set of keys and b) your thumbs.

C) the will to use them.

Until you are in such a situation most people don't know if they will react in a fight or flight manner.
Again it is best to not get if possible in such a situation in the first place.

Scarinae

When I was younger, my mum used to do home-selling of personal alarms. You kept it in your handbag and if someone tried to mug you, you'd pull the pin out and it made the most godawful noise! Not sure how useful it would be if someone was trying to rape you though.

Apparently armpits are another place to go for if you're in a situation where you're close enough to not be able to kick properly... Pinch some of the skin in his armpit and pull as hard as you can

Larianne

Thoie wrote: »

I'd disagree with that. I don't make prolonged eye contact, and I certainly don't stare, but keeping your head down and not looking

a) makes you look vulnerable
b) means you mightn't see someone coming at you

I find head held high, shoulders back, casual sweeping glances to both sides gives off a far more relaxed and less vulnerable air. Horses for courses maybe.

Well I meant more what you have said here. Keep alert but not eyeball someone walking past like Moonbaby has said. That's just asking for some loon to say "what you staring at?!?!?".

Moonspell

Thaedydal wrote: »

C) the will to use them.

Until you are in such a situation most people don't know if they will react in a fight or flight manner.
Again it is best to not get if possible in such a situation in the first place.

This is so true...

Did Karate for 4 years when young and started because my mother thought it would be good if I knew how to defend myself if ever needed.
Thankfully this never happend, and I do hope it never does. Sure I can say I can defend myself, but who's to say that even with all the "experience" in fighting I have I won't just freeze on the spot? Don't think I will but I don't know for sure... in the end is down to each one's ability to react to the situation!

challengemaster

Manties wrote: »

I dont mean to come off sounding sexist or anything here, but the self defence course dosent always work. I have a friend who is a guard, So she has had all that training. Out of interest one night i asked her to show me the "take down" move they use.... Didn't work at all, and shes not a 4 foot nothing size 6 girl.

Yeah, everyone knows how that one turned out anyway.. :pac:

Pen1987 wrote: »

*hasnt read the thread*

*dies laughing at the idea that a number of salt satches would be of use in defending yourself* "just wait a minute there Mr.Attacker while I tear these and pour them neatly into my palm so I can throw them in your eyes."

lulz

WindSock wrote: »

I was accidently kicked in the fanny once, it hurt like hell.

First of all - lol. Secondly, how the hell were you accidentally kicked in the gee?

Oh, and re: kicking a guy in the nads - that's fine.. if he's sober. If he's highly intoxicated or on drugs, then he probably wont feel a thing. A full force strike with the palm of your hand to the face (nose) will probably stun him for a few seconds, cause the eyes to water, etc. Keys then are good idea..

Anti

WindSock wrote: »

I was accidently kicked in the fanny once, it hurt like hell.

Ouch !!

Larianne

Larianne wrote: »

That's just asking for some loon to say "what you staring at?!?!?".

If someone trots out that line, it is likely they are hell bent on causing you trouble anyways.

Thaedydal makes a good point. I hope I never have to find out how effective my self defense strategies are.

dotsman

Thaedydal wrote: »

I have been accosted and attacked by more men over the years then women.
So your statics fail.

Thoie wrote: »

I'm with Thaedydal.

OK, I agree, my statistics weren't exactly scientific!

But, even amongst my friends, none of the girls have ever have ever been assaulted or even threatened by guys, whereas a few have been by girls.

As a matter of interest (if your willing to discuss), were any/many/all the guys who have accosted/attacked you been known to you? Were any of them the actual "random stranger follows you down a dark alley" etc. Did anybody come to your assistance?

fonpokno

JaneyMc wrote: »

I usually just carry my keys in my hand and have the pointy bits sticking throught the my fingers. Makes me fell a little safer.

I do that keys thing! Always let someone know I'm in a taxi on the way home or whatever and I'm wary as bejaysus. I'm also always the less drunk one looking out for all my ridiculous friends who get f*cked drunk and piss me off no end by randomly disappearing with random guys cos they're idiots. :mad:

Some girls I know just haven't got a clue. I'm terribly trusting but ridiculously full of suspicion at the same time somehow. The poor boyfriend is always convinced I'm going to be murdered whenever I'm out, the poor dote.

Thoie

dotsman wrote: »

As a matter of interest (if your willing to discuss), were any/many/all the guys who have accosted/attacked you been known to you? Were any of them the actual "random stranger follows you down a dark alley" etc. Did anybody come to your assistance?

PM sent with some details, but essentially in all cases they were strangers. In my case most were attempted muggings.

Nevyn

Most were not known to me at all and I know better then to be walking down dark alleys.

dotsman

Thoie wrote: »

PM sent with some details, but essentially in all cases they were strangers. In my case most were attempted muggings.

Do not mess with this girl!!!

Pol Pot

Thaedydal wrote: »

I have been accosted and attacked by more men over the years then women.
So your statics fail.

Pol Pot was a doorman for 8 years in dublin. He was attacked by many ladies so many that in fact he think they equalled attacks by men. Did that surprise you?

luckily for you liberals - pol pot believes in equality and they all went down.
except for that one guy in temple bar who tried to bite pol pot (in the face...not the face!!! yes the face) he went down and out and then out again....

On a more serious matter - Pol Pot is dismayed at the level of violence in this thread. In both ways. The perceived threat of violence and the reaction of people to this.

He is amazed that some many of you (who from other posts seem rational) feel afeared to such an extent as to carry a weapon of some kind or to wield an item as a weapon. or be constantly aware of "i might be attacked".

Pol Pot wonders if perhaps the level of violence of over hyped. Has media / political coverage elevated "random" violence to a level greater than it's rightful place in the order of events in society.

Certainly Pot Pot has come accross many situations where people say such and such place is a kip. But when challenged they can't actually claim to have been there in the first place. is this the same with our understanding of society. Certainly there is an image of dublin as being this vacous wasteland where the natives are coked up drunkards who rape and pillage their lives away. When lets be rational about this: it's not the case.
And limerick?? well that's another day.... You get my point!

Pol Pot assumes that this violence , you (as in people in general) fear is what the media describe as "random violence"
There is a perception that it's a warzone out there and Pol Pot challenges that perception.

his time as a doorman (mostly in dublin city centre) taught him many things. But 1 point he must stress is that he is finding it hard to remember a "random" act of violence. The is usually an prelude to an attack where the situation is able to be diffused.
In nearly all occasion , each party had the opportunity to walk away. pride hurt but physically intact.

Pol pot is male - perhaps ladies experience a different threat that he is unaware of. And by no means is pol pot is denying that violence against people exists but that perhaps it's perception has risen to the frenzy of histeria akin to the "peado on every corner" that was previlant in society a number of years ago.

Pol pot shakes his head. Maybe he is too old.

Stheno

challengemaster wrote: »

First of all - lol. Secondly, how the hell were you accidentally kicked in the gee?

Can't answer for Windsock, but it happened to me playing rugby, mother of god it was painful

Completely OT: Has Pighead invaded the lounge disguised as Pol Pot??? :eek:

Thoie

dotsman wrote: »

Do not mess with this girl!!!

But I'm the nice one!

Pol Pot - there are many situations that can be diffused with a "sorry" or "whoops". Many fights start out with a push - and at that stage things can usually be calmed down. There are also many situations without a prelude - someone coming up behind you and grabbing you as you walk somewhere, for example.

My preference in all cases is "getting away" - whether that be by diffusing the situation with talk, or running like f***. However being aware of your surroundings, having your keys ready so you don't stand fumbling in your handbag for 10 minutes are simple precautions similar to locking your front door when you leave the house. It is unlikely that someone will walk in to your house if you leave the door unlocked, but you don't take that chance, do you?

A lot of situations can be diffused by having a confident (not cocky) attitude. If it gives people confidence knowing that they have a plan in mind (be it nails in the eyes, or screaming fire), then this isn't a bad thing.

dotsman

Pol Pot wrote: »

On a more serious matter - Pol Pot is dismayed at the level of violence in this thread.

Same here (with regards the violence against the ladies)! I guess the ladies in my life have had a sheltered life (or have just been very lucky!)

Pol Pot wrote: »

But 1 point he must stress is that he is finding it hard to remember a "random" act of violence. The is usually an prelude to an attack where the situation is able to be diffused.
In nearly all occasion , each party had the opportunity to walk away. pride hurt but physically intact.

I have to say I disagree with this (I admit that many fights/assaults that I have witnessed did have a build up where one party could have walked away). Bu in my own ecxperiences, I have only ever been involved in 4 incidents and can categorically state that all 4 were random.

The first was a guy with a hurley who lunged at a bunch of us (put 2 guys in hospital), before we overpowered him.
The second was a guy (who I had never seen before) just charged up behind me a landed a dig in the back of my head. He was so drunk he immediately tripped over me before a bunch of lads(strangers) who were next to me "joined me" and seeing what he was up against, ran away cursing at all of us.
The third was a guy who did the whole "what are you fookin' starin' at" thing. I stood my ground, not saying a word and just staring him in the eyes (which really pissed him off), before his more sensible friend pulled him away, apologising to me.
The fourth was when a bunch of knacks (girls and guys) attacked a couple. I witnessed the whole thing and between seeing 2 girls kicking another girl while on the ground, 2 guys kicking the guy in the head on the ground with a third girl screaming "kick him in the nuts" while trying to stamp on his manhood with her high heels, I (foolishly in hindsight) ran over from across the street roaring and actually scared them off! Don't know why, there was only 1 of me and, although not a lightweight, am certainly no incredible hulk! From talking to the victims afterwards, they were attacked suddenly and there was no real lead up to the attack.

EamonnKeane

Thaedydal wrote: »

Cos generally speaking boys/men are meant to be strong/capable enough to look after themselves if they end up in a physical altercation and generally speaking if a woman ends up in a physical altercation with a man she is out done when it comes to strenght/muscles.

Which is why male victim of assalt and rape have a harder time coming forward cos men are ment to be able to look after themsevles and sure wimmin are delicate lil flowers....:rolleyes:

I think everyone should be 'aware' on a night out, best way out of a fight or physical altercation is to see it brewing and get out of the way.

That makes no sense; in a fight, one person is going to lose.

nouggatti wrote: »

Can't answer for Windsock, but it happened to me playing rugby, mother of god it was painful

Completely OT: Has Pighead invaded the lounge disguised as Pol Pot??? :eek:

Evil twin created when Pighead stood in the middle of the LHC beam hoping for superpowers.

Pen1987 wrote: »

*hasnt read the thread*

*dies laughing at the idea that a number of salt satches would be of use in defending yourself* "just wait a minute there Mr.Attacker while I tear these and pour them neatly into my palm so I can throw them in your eyes."

"Ha! You want more? I've got vinegar AND mustard too! That's it, run away!"

Macha

Pol Pot wrote: »

Pol Pot wonders if perhaps the level of violence of over hyped. Has media / political coverage elevated "random" violence to a level greater than it's rightful place in the order of events in society.

...

Pol pot is male - perhaps ladies experience a different threat that he is unaware of. And by no means is pol pot is denying that violence against people exists but that perhaps it's perception has risen to the frenzy of histeria akin to the "peado on every corner" that was previlant in society a number of years ago.

Pol pot shakes his head. Maybe he is too old.

According to the UN:

Violence against women and girls is a problem of pandemic proportions. At least one out of every three women around the world has been beaten, coerced into sex, or otherwise abused in her lifetime — with the abuser usually someone known to her.

http://www.unifem.org/campaigns/vaw/facts_figures.php

While rates of violence are higher in countries such as Saudi Arabi and Egypt, it happens here. According to Irish Health:

Between January 1996 and the end of June 2005, 109 women were murdered in Ireland, 72 of these in their own homes. In those cases which have been resolved (up to the end of June 2005), all were perpetrated by a man and almost half were perpetrated by the woman's partner or ex-partner.

So yes, a lot of the violence in Ireland is done by a person the woman knows but about half of it doesn't.

Having said that I HATE those fear-mongering email scams. Know the facts and know how to stay safe, don't live in fear.

Popinjay

Thaedydal wrote: »

I think everyone should be 'aware' on a night out, best way out of a fight or physical altercation is to see it brewing and get out of the way.

This can never be stressed enough. It's great to know what to do in unavoidable situations but far better to recognise how to avoid the (IMO) far more common ones where you can just get the hell out of it - or better again recognise how not to put oneself in certain situations in the first place.

Pol Pot wrote: »

He is amazed that some many of you (who from other posts seem rational) feel afeared to such an extent as to carry a weapon of some kind or to wield an item as a weapon. or be constantly aware of "i might be attacked".
[...]
Pol Pot assumes that this violence , you (as in people in general) fear is what the media describe as "random violence"
There is a perception that it's a warzone out there and Pol Pot challenges that perception.

There's a difference between being aware of what might happen and being constantly afraid that you're going to be attacked. And this from the idiot who used to carry the knife (See my first post in this thread).

Dublin is by no stretch of the imagination a 'war-zone' or anything similar but the sad fact of the matter is that attacks can and do happen. Now, sometimes, but I would think, not often, attacks happen anyway but their occurence would be far less frequent if more people knew what to look for and what to do to avoid it.

I would also like to point out to the ladies that carrying a knife is probably the worst thing you can do. As I was reminded in a book* last night, if you pull a knife and your bluff is called suddenly you've got very few options and [here's the important bit] they're all the wrong ones.

*Spot prize for whoever guesses the book. I'll give you a clue, it's Terry Pratchett.

Awayindahils

I used to have a rape alarm, and then that broke. Then I got a 6ft4" boyfriend, but now he's gone and I'm pretty sure I'm just as unobservant now as I was when I was with him. Must work on that.

I'm probably ridcilously unsafe. I just about don't walk down dark lanes alone. It's not that I'm unaware that there are dangers and more that I'm so used to living in Dublin that I just feel safe. I currently work on Talbot St. and when people find that out I get all the ooh Druggie land/so unsafe/please tell me you don't go near such and such a shop, but it's now normal for me I suppose.

At night I tend to get the nitelink as my major nod to safety. I live near UCD so there are always people about, seriously at 3 in the morning 2 weeks ago a girl offered to share her umbrella with me, and the street is fairly well lit.

Occassionally I note down the number of taxis, but I rarely get into one without someone having seen me. If I feel its dodgy I ring someone while I'm in the taxi and chat to them.