whats the funniest football chants you ever heard

Dues Bellator

i really like the liverpool fans one ,he,s quick he,s red, he talks like father ted ,robbie keane, robbie keane pure class.



they also had this not so good one .he,s big he,s dutch we like him very much westervelt ,westervelt ...........cringe

ive loads more just tought id get the thread started

Nalz

dont blame it on carra, dont blame on hyypia, dont blame it on dudek

blame it on traore

he just cant
he just cant
he just cant control his feet

_blank_

@ Derry City fans

What's it like to, what's it like to, what's it like to have a queen, what's it like to have a queen.

@ Refer Alal Kelly

Does your mother, does your mother, does your mother do your hair, does your mother do your hair?

KdjaCL

Pats fans to the tune of Karma Chameleon

Dessie Dessie Dessie Byrne he comes and goes he comes and goes.



kdjac

oobydooby

shit Dublin suburb, you're just a shit Dublin suburb...:rolleyes:

_blank_

KdjaCL wrote: »

Pats fans to the tune of Karma Chameleon

Dessie Dessie Dessie Byrne he comes and goes he comes and goes.



kdjac

:eek:

Soccer posters to kdjac to the tune of Karma Chameleon.

Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac The Mo-oh-oh-oh-od, where have you been, where have you beeee-eee-eeen.

KdjaCL

Des wrote: »

:eek:

Soccer posters to kdjac to the tune of Karma Chameleon.

Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac Kdjac The Mo-oh-oh-oh-od, where have you been, where have you beeee-eee-eeen.

afk?



kdjac

Boggles

There is one that tops them all, explained from wikipedia.

After it was reported in the press that Goram had a mild form of schizophrenia, fans responded with a chorus of "Two Andy Gorams, there's only two Andy Gorams" This chant quickly gained popularity, and became the title of a book documenting humorous football chants

_blank_

Small town in Munster, you're just a small town in Munster.

Two Liam Kearneys, there's only two Liam Kearneys.

20 Times 20 Times

KdjaCL wrote: »

Pats fans to the tune of Karma Chameleon

Dessie Dessie Dessie Byrne he comes and goes he comes and goes.



kdjac

you certainly come and and gooooooooooooooooooo

20 Times 20 Times

Very simple , after the maxi episode.

Burn baby burn

few years ago , in my season ticket days we used to sing :
There's only one Bobby Petta
He was ****e now he's better
We took him to mass
He's now masterclass
Walking in a Petta wonderland

20 Times 20 Times

Chelsea to Norwich. We're Owned by Abramovich, Your owned by an evil witch!
Norwich to Chelsea. We're Owned by a master cook, Your own by a Russian Crook!

Insect Overlord

"Cheer up Kevin Keegan, [originally Peter Reid ]
Oh what can it mean
To a sad Geordie b@stard and a
Crap football team?"

The Stretford End gave that one a good blast against the Toon recently, for all the good it did us...

_blank_

It's "shíte football team".

Insect Overlord

Des wrote: »

It's "shíte football team".

My apologies, that is correct. It's just I was 13 the first time I heard it, the fella who chanted it must've toned it down for the school yard! So, yeah, I've always thought of it with the other word used instead.

OPENROAD

Arsenal fans to Frank Lampard.


http://www.fanchants.com/football-videos/arsenal-v-villa-rocket-pub-went-to-lift-frank-lampard/

_blank_

OPENROAD wrote: »

Arsenal fans to Frank Lampard.


http://www.fanchants.com/football-videos/arsenal-v-villa-rocket-pub-went-to-lift-frank-lampard/

Actually, the Arsenal fans to Ashley Cole one is pretty funny too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ES5EWE_CLVk

OPENROAD

Des wrote: »

Actually, the Arsenal fans to Ashley Cole one is pretty funny too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ES5EWE_CLVk

The old bloke sitting behind that chap does not look that impressed

_blank_

OPENROAD wrote: »

The old bloke sitting behind that chap does not look that impressed

lol, I was going to stick that in my post.

It's great at the end of the video where the whole crew behind him is singing.

Look for the mother and son a bit behind the old dude too. I don't think the woman knows what to be doing.

Edit : You can't beat a good old offensive chant at football, imo. Obvioulsy not racism but anything designed to put the opposing player off is fair game. I spent a whole half abusing a player once, screaming my head off at him, calling him every name under the sun, he was a winger and he was very obviously drifting away from me as the game wore on, it was great. I even got a few laughs from his own bench.

I met the same player in a bar later in the season and asked him if he remembered it. "Christ, what did I do to that lad, murder his family?" was his reaction "I'd love to meet him" he said.

When I told him he just had, he started laughing his head off and shook my hand. Top bloke.

OPENROAD

Des wrote: »

Look for the mother and son a bit behind the old dude too. I don't think the woman knows what to be doing.

Just saw that, think he is asking his mother what they are singing about She doesn't know where to look.


Our away support is far more vocal then home support, suppose that is the same for most teams.

TedKelly

Man City fans singing...... " We all live in a Robbie Fowler house, a robbie fowler house, a robbie fowler house " to the tune of yellow submarine is class.

Xavi6

City fans -

"A wanker and his brother,
Made love to one another,
Sucked c*ck just like the mother,
The Neville family"

Love this one from last season -

"We don't need no Phil Scolari,
We don't need no Mourinho,
HEY THAKSIN!
Leave our Sven alone"

grenache

''Ah ah Ah Azerbaiiijaaan, Azerbaiiiijaaan, yeah yeah'' sung to the tune of 'Hey Jude' by Forest fans towards the Cardiff fans after Wales had been beaten by Azerbaijan the previous Wed nite.

Dues Bellator

you have got to see the yanks wind up celtic supporters in the states, shower of idiots but kinda funny lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDfnKzXzK7Q

Publin

Some that spring to mind:

"Who needs Abramovich, we sold our football pitch"
Also, "Six-fingered banjo players" - same tune

"We're from Dublin and we're better, than you,
we're from Dublin and we're better, than you,
we're better than you, we're better than you,
we're from Dublin and we're better than you"

"Singh when we're winning, we bring on Singh when we're winning" (upon Harpal Singh coming on as a sub when we're cruising to victory).

Dues Bellator

he,s big he,s flash he smokes the crack and hash ferdinand , ferdinand......... city supporters city v man u , was in sticthes in the away end.

Xavi6

Actually, my favourite one of ever has to be the one we always sang at Tolka to Brian Kerr -

"Brian Kerr's a wanker, he wears a wanker's hat,
When Jayo went to Poland he didn't fancy that,
He played an English bastard but Clinton couldn't score,
He's just a Pats knacker, f*ck off to Inchicore!"

It was especially great when Kerr was in the ground. An all time classic!

Publin

Xavi6 wrote: »

Actually, my favourite one of ever has to be the one we always sang at Tolka to Brian Kerr -

"Brian Kerr's a wanker, he wears a wanker's hat,
When Jayo went to Poland he didn't fancy that,
He played an English bastard but Clinton couldn't score,
He's just a Pats knacker, f*ck off to Inchicore!"

It was especially great when Kerr was in the ground. An all time classic!

Reminds me of the one during the friendly -v- Sunderland

Roy Keane is a traitor, he wears a traitors hat,
When he was brought to Saipan, he didn't fancy that,
He could have played for Ireland in Korea and Japan,
But he's just an English b*stard and he's not an Irish man" :cool:

A few more that I've remembered:
(To the tune of The Beautiful South - Rotterdam)
"This could be Tolka Park, the RDS, Dalymount or Milltown
Cause Rovers will play anywhere,
Cause they've no f*cking home,
They've no f*cking home".

This one also:
"Ernie Crawford, he's our friend,
He's our friend, he's our friend
Ernie Crawford, he's our friend
He hates Rovers

Dig him up to kill some more,
Kill some more, kill some more,
Dig him up to kill some more,
He hates Rovers"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ernie_Crawford

One Cold Hand

'He's small, he's quick, he's got a massive dick,
Ashley Younggggggggg!!!'

Villa fans after a story emerged about Young waving his slong around on the net!

Xavi6

Publin wrote: »

Reminds me of the one during the friendly -v- Sunderland

Roy Keane is a traitor, he wears a traitors hat,
When he was brought to Saipan, he didn't fancy that,
He could have played for Ireland in Korea and Japan,
But he's just an English b*stard and he's not an Irish man" :cool:

:eek: How have I not heard that before?! My new favourite!

Always a funny one at Dalyer -

"Hill, Hill, Davey, Davey Hill
He's got no hair but we don't care
Davey, Davey Hill"

The countdown for the amount of years since Rovers won the league is great, culminating in "X years and won fuck all, doo da, doo da"

Mr.Nice Guy

(To the tune of Monster)

"What's that coming out of your sock, is it your ankle? Is it your ankle?"

I believe this chant was by Villa fans a few matches after the Eduardo horror tackle.

Probably not one I could bring myself to sing as I'd fear the karma but I did LOL.

Guy:Incognito

Mr.Nice Guy wrote: »

(To the tune of Monster)

"What's that coming out of your sock, is it your ankle? Is it your ankle?"

I believe this chant was by Villa fans a few matches after the Eduardo horror tackle.

Probably not one I could bring myself to sing as I'd fear the karma but I did LOL.

Theres the monster one for Chopra too.

"Whats that coming over the hill, it's Micheal Chopra"

One Cold Hand

Mr.Nice Guy wrote: »

(To the tune of Monster)

"What's that coming out of your sock, is it your ankle? Is it your ankle?"

I believe this chant was by Villa fans a few matches after the Eduardo horror tackle.

Probably not one I could bring myself to sing as I'd fear the karma but I did LOL.

Yeah Villa fans sang that. Funny you should mention Karma, a week later Curtis Davies did his ACL!

Mr Alan

The Everton fans have one for Gerrard to that Monster tune to, after rumours his missus had an affair with a local criminal....

"whos that cumming over your bird, is it a gangster? is it a gangster?"

Also, Xavi, your one with the about the Neville family, i've heard it with different lyrics, but similar in a similar vein (incest)

Xavi6

Actually that other Gerrard one was class too -

"You transfer in,
You transfer out,
In, Out, In, Out, Shake it all about,
You do the Stevie Gerrard and you turn it around,
And thats what its all about.
Oh scouse bastards, oh scouse bastards, oh scouse bastards
In, Out, In, Out, shake it all about."

Mr Alan

I like the old Liverpool one for Duncan Ferguson too;

"in for a week, out for a month,
in for a week and out for a month,
in for a week and out for a month,
in for a week and out for a month,
Duncan is a tampon"

cournioni

"We paid for their home,
We paid for their ho-o-ome,
What a waste of council tax,
We paid for their home.

They don't even go,
They don'e even go-o-o,
What a waste of council tax,
They don't even go."

- Aimed at City fans for the lack of attendance at the City of Manchester Stadium (the council house)

"This Is How It Feels To Be City
This Is How It Feels To Be Small
This Is How It Feels When Your Team Wins Nothing At All"

- Again, United fans toward City, says it all but funny when you listen to the original song.

"Feed the Scousers,
Let them know it's Christmas time,
Feed the Scousers,
Let them know it's Christmas time..."

- Gets you in the Xmas spirit.

Xavi6

"When you're sat in Row Z
And the ball hits your head
It's Zamora"

"Singing aye-aye-yippee,
Sun Jihai,
Singing aye-aye-yippee,
Sun Jihai,
Singing aye-aye-yippee,
His dad's got a chippy,
Aye-aye-yippee Sun Jihai."



This one is a mid 90s classic -

"You've lost Ndlovu and Whelan" to Coventry fans when both players were sold

Can't beat the ol 'Team of Gary Breens' either

KevIRL

Leeds v Ipswich in the early Premiership days. Ipswich were almost mathematically certain to go down, Leeds were in 15th/16th spot and coming to the end of the season.

Leeds fans - "Going down, going down, going down"

Ipswich fans - "So are we, so are we, so are we"

Im_No_Superman

Trilla wrote: »

dont blame it on carra, dont blame on hyypia, dont blame it on dudek

blame it on traore

he just cant
he just cant
he just cant control his feet

My favourite!

This was very popular a couple of years ago when I saw Utd vs Pool game at OT.

Steve Gerrard, Gerrard,
He kisses the badge on his chest,
Then puts in a transfer request,
Steve Gerrard, Gerrard...

cournioni

Ha, I remember in the same game Crouch was coming on as substitute and the United fans started singing "What the fcuk, what the fcuk, what the fcukin hell is that?! What the fcukin hell is that?"

Im_No_Superman

PORNAPSTER wrote: »

Ha, I remember in the same game Crouch was coming on as substitute and the United fans started singing "What the fcuk, what the fcuk, what the fcukin hell is that?! What the fcukin hell is that?"

Ha ha remember that too.

Mr Alan

was that the game when he scored and knocked ye out of the FA cup?

should have got rival fans to abuse him more in that case

death1234567

Mr.Nice Guy wrote: »

(To the tune of Monster)

"What's that coming out of your sock, is it your ankle? Is it your ankle?"

I believe this chant was by Villa fans a few matches after the Eduardo horror tackle.

The week after the horror tackle and they also sang this:

"Eduardo, ohh ohh,Eduardo, ohh ohh, he used to have the skills, now he walks like heather mills, Eduardo, ohh ohh..."

Xavi6

Stekelly wrote: »

Theres the monster one for Chopra too.

"Whats that coming over the hill, it's Micheal Chopra"

Also after rumours of Gerrard's missus having a bit on the side -

"What's that cummin over your bird, is it a gangster, is it a gangster?!"

Mr Alan

check about 10 posts up Xavi :rolleyes:;)

Im_No_Superman

Mr Alan wrote: »

was that the game when he scored and knocked ye out of the FA cup?

should have got rival fans to abuse him more in that case

Afraid not, when we beat ye 2-0 at Old Trafford, Scholesy gave a masterclass that day.

Xavi6

Mr Alan wrote: »

check about 10 posts up Xavi :rolleyes:;)

Ah well. So good they posted it twice!

Necronomicon

One Cold Hand wrote: »

Yeah Villa fans sang that. Funny you should mention Karma, a week later Curtis Davies did his ACL!

I think that was actually the same game O_o

Fratton Fred

Reading fans to pretty much anyone north of Watford

In your Northern Slums, In your Northern Slums
you go through the dustbins for something to eat
you find a dead cat and you think its a treat
In your northern slums.

I like the one England sing to the Dutch

"If it wasn't for the english you'd be krauts"

therecklessone

death1234567 wrote: »

The week after the horror tackle and they also sang this:

"Eduardo, ohh ohh,Eduardo, ohh ohh, he used to have the skills, now he walks like heather mills, Eduardo, ohh ohh..."

I remember hearing both songs at Spurs shortly after the incident, and thinking back I'm almost certain it was at the Carling Cup final two days later. So I'm claiming them for the Yids...:D

We don’t need no drunken drivers,
No baggage stealers in our team,
No lying Judas or cocaine dealers
Wenger leave those kids alone
HEY WENGER,LEAVE THOSE KIDS ALONE,
all in all your just another prick from Arsenal.

Olden but golden.

Who's got a big fat Wife,
Who's got a big fat Wife,
Ian Wright
Ian Wright
He's got a big fat Wife

Can also be "who's got a big fat mum" [SWP] or "who's got a lovely wife" [Danny Murphy + Jamie Redkrapp]

Here for the sailors

Spurs fans away at Pompey to our good friend rSol. Had a chat with a couple of Pompey fans after our game there last December..."you really don't like Campbell do you?"...:D