Is it poisoned or something?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

My sister's boyfriend, generally known for being a nice guy but a bit of a prick (couple of shades more pleasant than say...Rex off Big brother) has just brought me up a big plate of beans and toast and mushrooms, and a cup of tea, completely unsolicited. Not just any cup of tea either-MY cup of tea, made just the way I like it. This is the second time in two days he's pulled this stunt! Wtf is going on? Should I eat the food? Ask for more? See if he'll clean the house or something? Maybe he's after something and when he asks for it and I say no he'll go "ah go on you have to, I made you tea!" any lads ever butter up the sister in law for any specific reason care to give me an insight into the male psyche?

Jimbo

Sex. Specifically a 'sister sandwich'.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

he's hoping for a 3some

Epic Tissue

Sounds like a nice guy.

edit: nevermind, obviously wants a 3sum

Dord

He's lookin' for a threesome. That's the only logical answer.

gino85

chances are your sister is pregnant and he want to get on ur good side before he brakes the news

that or take note of the 2 posts above me

Jimbo

This doesn't happen to be you and you sister, does it?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Good, coz I ate the food (and it was nice). And I should have seen the threesome thing coming (hna), sucks to be him though, they're minors like so my hands are tied

Caoimhín

He wants the two of yous to spit roast your sister.

Id say give it a shot, what have you got to lose?

And your sister gives good head so you should call the mouth.

Good luck on that OP.

Caoimhín

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

Good, coz I ate the food (and it was nice). And I should have seen the threesome thing coming (hna), sucks to be him though, they're minors like so my hands are tied

Minors?

Hands tied?

Where do you live?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

jimbo78 wrote: »

This doesn't happen to be you and you sister, does it?

Yup yup

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

caoibhin wrote: »

Minors?

Hands tied?

Where do you live?

Austria

D'uh

Loopy

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

My sister's boyfriend, generally known for being a nice guy but a bit of a prick

Is this not a total contradiction

KnifeWRENCH

He's obviously just trying to earn yhour trust before he makes the fatal strike and kills you.

I say you must kill him first. Do it. NOW

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

looptheloop wrote: »

Is this not a total contradiction

Not at all, he's a sound out guy, just doesn't take any ****e like, and he's not good at pretending to like people he doesn't...nobody's ever described him as "lovely" let's just say

Black Swan

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

Rex off Big brother

:eek:

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

square_igloo wrote: »

He's obviously just trying to earn yhour trust before he makes the fatal strike and kills you.

I say you must kill him first. Do it. NOW

He's really tall! I'm just a girl

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

:eek:

It's okay, he's not ginger

KnifeWRENCH

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

He's really tall! I'm just a girl

Tall people cannot be killed by girls?
So Kill Bill was all fictional? :eek:

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

square_igloo wrote: »

Tall people cannot be killed by girls?
So Kill Bill was all fictional? :eek:

No, see she was a badass girl, I'm only little and weak in comparison. Also, killing people does seem to be your answer to everything....sister's boyfriend being nice, world hunger etc...it's becoming a theme :pac:

rhapsody!

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

My sister's boyfriend, generally known for being a nice guy but a bit of a prick (couple of shades more pleasant than say...Rex off Big brother) has just brought me up a big plate of beans and toast and mushrooms, and a cup of tea, completely unsolicited. Not just any cup of tea either-MY cup of tea, made just the way I like it. This is the second time in two days he's pulled this stunt! Wtf is going on? Should I eat the food? Ask for more? See if he'll clean the house or something? Maybe he's after something and when he asks for it and I say no he'll go "ah go on you have to, I made you tea!" any lads ever butter up the sister in law for any specific reason care to give me an insight into the male psyche?

Evidently he suspects you think he's a prick and he's trying to win your approval. xD

Either that or he's knocked her up!

MagicMarker

Wait..... Beans on toast.... with MUSHROOMS!!!!! WTF???

I say kill him, kill him dead.

You have turned your back on the scared code of the elder sibling.
Instead of looking after your little sisters welfare in a clued in, and painful manner that your parents never could.
You've been fighting her corner, and this little gob****e now has a dry place to use as a shagpad.

You deserve everything you get for disrupting the laws of nature!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Moonbaby wrote: »

You have turned your back on the scared code of the elder sibling.
Instead of looking after your little sisters welfare in a clued in, and painful manner that your parents never could.
You've been fighting her corner, and this little gob****e now has a dry place to use as a shagpad.

You deserve everything you get for disrupting the laws of nature!

Not quite sure what you're talking about, but if disobeying the laws of nature gets me food, I'm going to go for a fly later I like food.

phasers

She is so pregnant

KnifeWRENCH

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

No, see she was a badass girl, I'm only little and weak in comparison. Also, killing people does seem to be your answer to everything....sister's boyfriend being nice, world hunger etc...it's becoming a theme :pac:

Ah yes, ending world hunger by killing all the starving people.
I thought that was a rather inspired idea on my part :pac:

markos79

jimbo78 wrote: »

Sex. Specifically a 'sister sandwich'.

brilliant jimbo lmfao:D

Dublin1600

Never drink a cup of tea from a stranger, I used to piss in the kettle when my brothers friends were over

markos79

Dublin1600 wrote: »

Never drink a cup of tea from a stranger, I used to piss in the kettle when my brothers friends were over

you are one sick puppy!!

ninty9er

phasers wrote: »

She is so pregnant

+1

or he fancies you.

How old exactly are there.....there is one other possible reason.

MagicMarker

Probably not poisoned, just jizzed all over it.

northdubgal

MagicMarker wrote: »

Probably not poisoned, just jizzed all over it.

lovely, beans with mayo :eek:

flanum

its this....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZOoKCOWlbs

"its fizzing"...LOLS!

jackbutler

MagicMarker wrote: »

Wait..... Beans on toast.... with MUSHROOMS!!!!! WTF???

I say kill him, kill him dead.

hear hear!
stab him twice for me :]

AARRRGH

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

Good, coz I ate the food (and it was nice).

I take it you couldn't taste the semen, or...?!

antodeco

Maybe Yore Ma turned him down? Or maybe she didnt. Quadsum FTW

ninty9er

I think it's now safe to say she's been poisoned since we haven't heard back. She may be in hospital or she may be dead, or maybe she's run off to Scotland to get hitched to the little sis's fella:D:D

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

I'm still here, not poisoned as far as I can tell, though I do have to go brush my teeth a lot now after reading the jizz theories, and I'm also curious about what else ninety9er thinks it may be....bye

ninty9er

My other theory is really age dependent....they might want to tell your parents they want to have sex and be looking for some guidance;)

ninty9er

So what was it....we spent time coming up with outrageous and not so outrageous conspiracy theories....we demand answers gawdammit:D:D

Aodan83

here here. its been a week and we still dont know whats goin on. do you know whats goin on?
i just had a terrible thought, maybe he just felt like being nice to you. no, your sis put him up to it. i wonder how deep this particular rabbit hole goes?!?!!

Davidius

He killed your sister.

Though you've probably noticed by now.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Haven't seen him much since, I've been away...ninety9er, on the sex thing, they're definitely already getting jiggy with it, neither of them have asked me to cover for them, put in a good word for them, or even buy them alcohol recently I did steal his watch though, in an attempt to force a resolution, but no luck so far. Where's the wanker now that's what I want to know, I'm starving

(alternative post to follow)

Xavi6

Vance Gigantic Rank wrote: »

Haven't seen him much since, I've been away...ninety9er, on the sex thing, they're definitely already getting jiggy with it, neither of them have asked me to cover for them, put in a good word for them, or even buy them alcohol recently I did steal his watch though, in an attempt to force a resolution, but no luck so far. Where's the wanker now that's what I want to know, I'm starving

(alternative post to follow)

He's behind you crackin one out.

Seriously, just give him what he wants.

Rayven199

Dont eat the mushrooms.....

Steve_o

Mmmm sister sandwich with beans....:eek:

Energizeer

What does ANtiFreeze taste like?

andrew

Your sister put him up to it because she gets the impression that you don't like him.

Either that or she's up the Duff.

Or he wants a sister sammich.

Dragan

gino85 wrote: »

chances are your sister is pregnant and he want to get on ur good side before he brakes the news

that or take note of the 2 posts above me

Agreed. He has knocked up your sister and it hoping if he feeds you ya won't batter him.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Right, so he finally worked up the nerve to tell me what's going on. Apparently he wants my help approaching the sis on a sensitive issue, as in he wants me to subtly sound her out about something to see if she'll completely freak out it before he raises the subject.
So, a while back, he (let's call him Fabio) was staying over at a mates house with another one of their friends. They were all after a few, and apparently, after lights out, things got a bit hot and steamy....I'd better not go into details, for the sake of keeping it PG13, but let's just say somebody gave him the keys to a whole new kingdom of gaydom. So now Fabio wants to approach the sister (let's call her Psychohosebeast), to see how she'd feel about him exploring his feelings and feeling in an exploring manner. He's also slightly concerned that the other friend might have been freaked out about the beautiful expression of love happening in the bed beside him. He didn't join in as Fabio had expected, he just buggered off and hasn't been particularly chatty since. So you see, Fabio has two problems, and I'll let him know when he's made me enough tea to solve them.

Rayven199

That sounds awfully familiar.....

Like another thread in this forum perhaps except from the third guys side (the guy who didnt get involved in the 2 dudes doin each other)