Looking Your Age

GuanYin

Ok, I've been pretty much harassed into posting this thread here, but here goes.

Do you find it important to look your age? Do you look your actual age or do you look older or younger? Do you try and dress older or younger than you are?

I ask because of two incidents this week. I'm at the end of my 20's and I'm a senior professional in my work (which is a hospital). I tend to dress business casual, which my brother tells me makes me look like I've just made my confirmation. Outside of work I tend to dress pretty much the way I've dressed for the past 10 years, I don't follow fashion but I just wear what I like.

Anyway, maybe its my hair cut or something but last week I was getting petrol and the attendant came out and asked where my parents were and who was paying. I kinda ignored it and brushed it off but something that happened in work today reaaaaly pushed me over the edge.

I'm covering a hospital that I don't normally work at the moment so noone knows me there. Anyways today and I was at the staff vending machine, with know white coat and one of the senior admins came up and asked me what was I doing here and where my parents were. Now, this wasn't a glance from the side or behind, this person could see me quite clearly.

So now I'm feeling like I really need to do something to make myself look much older. Any suggestions?

Anyone else have this problem?

biko

Pics needed

ntlbell

PSI: Las Vegas wrote: »

So now I'm feeling like I really need to do something to make myself look much older. Any suggestions?

Anyone else have this problem?

Why would you want to? most women spend most of their lives spending huge money on products etc to look younger.

Thanks your blessings and hope it lasts is my suggestion

Drift

I'm not sure if you're male or female .... if you're a man grow a moustache or a beard. Simple.

If you're a woman don't change a thing.

LadyJ

I'm 22 but look about 17 I'm told (don't think I do though tbh). Don't really care most of the time but it can be annoying. I get my hair done every so often and it usually makes me look a little more my age but I don't think I dress young or anything.

Only thing is, I always dress up for a night out, like in a skirt or dress (nothing young looking or anything, usually plain black dresses). I never wear trousers or jeans on nights out. I get asked for ID a reasonable amount. I think mainly it's to do with the fact that I have very pale skin and never wear fake tan, always just buy pale makeup. It looks good and all but because I wear black I can tend to look like a "goth" so I think that swings it tbh.

jellie

im 23 & look much younger (though im starting to get lines under my eyes! )

i regularly get IDed - doesnt really bother me, i try to take as a compliment, though i think its a bit much, maybe i look young but i dont think i look 17!

but last yr around my birthday, so was just gone 22 i went to get a haircut. hairdresser wasnt saying much which i was happy enough with. then she asked me how i wore my hair to school. eeeeeeeemm im 22! she was like "OMG i thought you were 14!!!! im sorry!"

corcaighcailin9

Hey OP I have the same problem, though not to the extreme extent you suffer through. I'm 24 and look a fair bit younger. I got ID'd getting fags a few weeks ago after work when I was dressed v respectably (or so I thought). Was morto. Whenever I moan about this, I'm always told that it's a compliment, I'll be glad when I'm older etc. It's just one of those things I guess, sorry.

Syke

PSI: Las Vegas wrote: »

So now I'm feeling like I really need to do something to make myself look much older.

*Maybe* it isn't just how you look. Actions speak louder than words.

Oryx

Its a complaint youll be delighted with as you grow older. :)If you're male, grow facial hair. Think hard about how you dress and maybe tweak it into an older look. Female, wear something 'grown up feminine' ie makeup jewellery, heels etc.

Nothing ott, just enough to set you apart as an adult.

I wish that still happened to me. Sigh.

Aisling(",)

im 16 but most people would say i look younger.even n work clothes like black trousers white shirt people would pressume im around 14.dosent bother me that much just i know if i still look younger when im 18,19 and getting i.ded all the time itd drive me nuts

WindSock

Grow some facial hair, wear platform shoes and a pinstripe suit to look taller and maybe eat more or work out more to fill out a bit

Pighead

WindSock wrote: »

Grow some facial hair,

Can women do that now?:eek:

WindSock

yes

GuanYin

WindSock wrote: »

Grow some facial hair, wear platform shoes and a pinstripe suit to look taller and maybe eat more or work out more to fill out a bit

Grow facial hair? Even if I could....uggghhh.

Try walking a hospital for 12 hours wearing platforms.

WindSock

I see. would you consider a little make-up for a 9 O'Clock shadow look?

WindSock

Sorry Psi, I really don't know how one could make themselves look physically older. I would have to see what you look like or make suggestions on what to wear, but if you are in a Hospital most of your days I presume you couldn't wear a tweed jacket

GuanYin

WindSock wrote: »

Sorry Psi, I really don't know how one could make themselves look physically older. I would have to see what you look like or make suggestions on what to wear, but if you are in a Hospital most of your days I presume you couldn't wear a tweed jacket

I think you're confused about me

Never mind though - I'm not sure I'm welcome here.

And no I don't wear a tweed jacket.

WindSock

PSI: Las Vegas wrote: »

Never mind though - I'm not sure I'm welcome here.

Why would you think that? I don't see why you wouldn't be.

bills

i have to say i have exactly the same problem. I know it sounds great but it isnt always. I find, especially in a work situation,customers think i dont know what im talking about etc. People often make assumptions that just because you look young you dont know things or cant do things. I have tried to make myself look older but its pretty much impossible & i always end up looking crap. But there are worse complaints. I know how it can make you insecure though. The only solution is confidence in yourself.

Weidii

Hmm, maybe some facial hair... Shave your hairline to make it look like it's receeding :P Grow a beer gut too

Bunnywabbit*

I've the same problem, when i was 16/17 I had peroxide blonde hair, and I could get into any pub or club in Cork, but since I turned 18 and dyed my hair dark brown/black, I'm having trouble getting in places.... strange....

GuanYin

I look older with my hair up but I try avoid it because I'm self concious about the shape of my face. I am dark skinned so I don't wear make up much, plus I tend to have to wash alot during the day so I'd be re-applying multiple times.

Maybe he was being a sarcastic fook. Because he has badness is his heart.

Has it happened much otherwise?

Blush_01

It's easy for people like me to tell you to take it as a compliment, but I can imagine it must be really frustrating for you. I look my age, pretty much, I used to look older than I was but I was mistaken for a transition year student a few months ago (which I was a little bit chuffed about!) so I don't know what you're going through really - one isolated incident is very different from fairly constant annoyance.

I would suggest that you talk to your hairdresser and see what (s)he suggests with regard to both cut and colour. Make-up would have been a suggestion, but it's not practical for you.

How about some older accessories, like scarves, or more "grown up" clothes, if you don't have to wear a uniform? You could try one of the personal shopping services in Topshop or one of the consessions in Arnotts (it's advertised in the Ladies bathroom, but I can't remember who it's for) if you're in Dublin. Even if you don't buy anything, they might be able to suggest outfit options that make you look older. It's hard to suggest how to modify something here when we can't actually see you (don't mind Biko).

Best of luck!

rainbowtrout

I wouldn't worry about it too much to be honest. If they're saying it in 10 years time, you will be chuffed. I'm in the same position, I'm 29 and I'm a teacher and I've been mistaken for a student a few times, especially on tours where I might be dressed casually.

During the summer I was out for a walk locally and I met a local woman who asked me if I was looking forward to going back to school. She looked the age that would have kids in the school, so I assumed she knew who I was (fairly common around here)... she went on to ask me if I was going into Leaving Cert and I was like 'Ah, no I teach Leaving Cert' I think the poor woman wanted the ground to swallow her up there and then :eek:

it's fun going into a school examining, knowing the school secretary won't pass any heed of you when you appear at the office and then when you tell her you're there examining, seeing the look of horror on her face having been so ignorant 30 seconds earlier.

No point feeling bad about it, make them squirm rather than the other way around.

Eviledna

Despite your previous comments, perhaps some eyeliner (the waterproof kind) and some strong coloured lipstick might be helpful and are re-applicable!
Also, I have often found the addition of a cardigan to any outfit can age it considerably:D

Dudess

My mate's nearly 29 and a doctor. All she ever gets is patients saying to whatever other staff member is around (as if she's not there) "I'm not having that little young one looking after me". My other mate's nearly 30 and a teacher. Parents regularly say stuff like "shur what's a little young one like you doing teaching kids"/"I don't want a young one like her teaching my child" etc.
Drives them mad and I wouldn't blame them.

On the other hand I'm nearly 30 and get told I look 23 or 24, which is nice in fairness. My mum doesn't look anywhere near her 60 years so hopefully I'm inheriting her genes. A lad was chatting me up one night and he said "well I'm a fair bit older than you so you wouldn't remember what I'm talking about". I asked him what year he was born. "Oh 1979 - I know, way back in the dark ages" or something like that. I just laughed and told him I was actually born the year before him which surprised him. Have to say it was very complimentary.

rain on

I started getting ID'd around the time I turned 23 which is a bit random. I usually looked my age until then.

Occasionally I get people asking am I finished school, and they get a bit surprised when I say I am yeah, and I'm finished my degree and my masters too thanks

GuanYin

Dudess wrote: »

My mate's nearly 29 and a doctor. All she ever gets is patients saying to whatever other staff member is around (as if she's not there) "I'm not having that little young one looking after me".

Do I know you?


I was in Vegas a while back and they have a guess your age think at one of the hotel casinos. They guessed 14 years younger (they tried to get within 3 years).

monkeyfudge

WindSock wrote: »

I see. would you consider a little make-up for a 9 O'Clock shadow look?

I know a little pound shop that sells fake mustaches...

WindSock

What are you talking about? How is a fake moustache going to help the OP's problem?

monkeyfudge

WindSock wrote: »

What are you talking about? How is a fake moustache going to help the OP's problem?

Fake mustaches are the answer to all of life's problems... well that and ponchos.

Tragedy

I've been working in a hospital for 7months or so, all I can offer is:

I can usually tell regs/sho's from random staff or patients by the way they dress. A lot of the female ones I see dress very...sorry, cant think of a better word than classily. Heels, tights, long skirts and nice blouses/tops. I know its not very helpful or descriptive but hopefully you get what I mean. One poor respiratory reg was short, had a really cute/girly high pitched voice but made up for it by the way she dressed.

When they're in scrubs, I can usually still tell which are doctors and which are nurses/theatre staff just by bearing/self-possesion(is that a word?) - and this goes for those who just do trousers+jumper.

Wow, thats absolutely no help. Oh well. I'll keep an eye out for a doctor who looks 14 and say "Hello, I come from the internet".

WindSock

monkeyfudge wrote: »

Fake mustaches are the answer to all of life's problems... well that and ponchos.

Add sombreros and pinatas to that mix then we have a deal. Not to mention fajitas.

Blush_01

And tequila!

tallaght01

PSI: Las Vegas wrote: »

I look older with my hair up but I try avoid it because I'm self concious about the shape of my face. I am dark skinned so I don't wear make up much, plus I tend to have to wash alot during the day so I'd be re-applying multiple times.

PSI, I always thought you were a bloke...until I read the above!

If you're now a woman, I can't help.

If you're still a bloke...then I have the answer to all your problems...

The monacle and bow-tie combo.

Never fails.

Crumble Froo

i think i tend to look older than i am. usually passing for 23-26. i turned 20 two days ago. i dont mind either way. i like not getting asked for ID (specially as my garda ID gets some weird looks over this side of the world), and i dont think it'll be an issue til im 25 and getting mistaken for being in my 30s.

i guess it helps that my b/f is so much older htan me... makes the age gap a little less weird to the general public or something.

Silverfish

Start smoking. I'm 31, but people have guessed my age at anything up to 40.


So, I don't really have any advice to give, having the opposite problem, but I can say I'd rather people thought I was younger than think I'm in my 40's.





(Do not start smoking)

kittensoft1984

i look really young or so im told.

Though i never get asked for ID going into pubs which is odd....

TheNog

I'm 31 but one fella described me as late 40's, early 50's. Disgusted!!!!!!!

My g/f on the other hand is 32 and she gets asked for her ID.

God only knows what bouncers must think of me.

Nevyn

I would suggest changing your work wardrobe to something more conservative and with an older/retro cut/tailoring. Also wear your work ID in a more prominent place.


People underestimate my age from anything from 6 to 12 years but it depends on what I am wearing. Apparently 33 year old mother's of two don't wear combats and rage against the machine t shirts.

Crazy Catlady

I think I look my age, 32 but people would guess anything from 26/27, which is never a bad thing
My sister is 25 and constantly has trouble being taken seriously in her job cos people assume she is younger.
I think someone else made the point about dressing "classy". I know what they mean. There are some women who thrown on a suit and top and look fine. Some women, age irrelenvant exude "class" tho, and that automatically gives them a sense of confidence and power.
It makes people they come in contact with respond to them in a different way, usually more respectfully.
This isn't a beauty or age issue. Its about projecting confidence and control. People are less likeky to question someone who assumes authority.

Beruthiel

PSI: Las Vegas wrote: »

I tend to dress business casual, which my brother tells me makes me look like I've just made my confirmation.

You're taking fashion advice from your brother!?
Considering his dress sense I'd ignore anything further he has to say on the subject

I don't follow fashion but I just wear what I like.

I do the same. If you like it, feel comfortable in it, I think that's fine.

Is the shape of your face so bad that you really would never think of tying it up?
Wearing a bit of lipstick and eye shadow might also help.

Anyways today and I was at the staff vending machine, with know white coat and one of the senior admins came up and asked me what was I doing here and where my parents were.

Most annoying I'm sure. But in another 10 years time you'll be thrilled!
As Thaed said, wear your tag where people can see it, if there are any more comments, point at it and look them square in the eye.

Niamho!

corcaighcailin9 wrote: »

Hey OP I have the same problem, though not to the extreme extent you suffer through. I'm 24 and look a fair bit younger. I got ID'd getting fags a few weeks ago after work when I was dressed v respectably (or so I thought). Was morto. Whenever I moan about this, I'm always told that it's a compliment, I'll be glad when I'm older etc. It's just one of those things I guess, sorry.

mm-hhmm. i dont look younger and i dont have those problems but the very odd time when i do get ID'd i freak out. I HATE it!!! people tell me its a compliment and all that but its So feckin annoying when it happens!! i dont wanna look younger now i wanna look younger when im in my 30's!!!

I look about 17 I think. I am sure my navy raincoat and carrying my laptop bag/backpack around the place doesn't help. Bus drivers try giving me schoolchild fares sometimes o.O
At least I haven't been asked very recently am I doing my LC...

WindSock

People always think I am younger than what I am, although a lot of the time it's probably down to how I act . I also carry a fake student ID to get into places cheaper, so it's not so bad. As for making myself look older, I guess I don't really try to. I just wear what I feel most comfortable in, and if people mistake me for a different age, I just laugh.
Sorry Psi for assuming you were a guy aswell. I didn't read your first post properly. You must really feel like you have an identity crisis now

metrovelvet

I had this problem for a long time but age is catching up with me these days, but it wasnt just my face, but a young sounding voice also.

Yes to look older, or to compensate for the lack of authority your youthful looks give you, dress more conservatively and carry yourself with more ownership.

I think alot of this can be camouflaged by body language and vocal changes.

shell63

I'm 25 and I look about 18/19 (I'm short which for some reason does tend to make people think you look younger and I'm not big into strong lipstick or makeup colours) However, colleagues have always assumed I am older than I am. This may not be much help to the OP but as other posters have said, I think your manner and presence have a huge influence on the matter. To be honest, I'm never bothered by looking young because I know the moment I open my mouth that perception is changed. I wonder if perhaps OP doesn't feel as confident about this?

LadyE

Niamho! wrote: »

mm-hhmm. i dont look younger and i dont have those problems but the very odd time when i do get ID'd i freak out. I HATE it!!! people tell me its a compliment and all that but its So feckin annoying when it happens!! i dont wanna look younger now i wanna look younger when im in my 30's!!!

Hi!!!!

Personally, I think you look young for your age, not too young, you're fresh faced, but you would know your in your twenties, nice balance I think!!

You look great!

I don't think I look young. I've never been ided (except obviously in the US where they have to id everyone)....I regularly passed for over 18 from age 11 on.

But alot of the teenagers now style themselves to look much older than they are.
I was home this christmas, and I was a bit surprised that the place had managed to attract so many new hotties.
So I'm the middle of giving a nearby one the eye, and my mates little baby brother starts to chat him up. They are in same year in school! :eek:

Talk about morto...

gollyitsolly

Smoke 40 a day,have children,get a huge mortgage, loose the job...............you,ll age overnight.