Missing inventions

ojewriej

Do you ever think that there are inventions which should be around by now, but for some reason they are not?

I don't mean like flying cars, but inventions we have technology for, they are fairly obvious, but for some reason they are not here?

One example would be a central locking for houses. I mean, they can't be that difficult to sort out, i think we have the technlogy and it would be very handy, and yet - nothing. Few little engines in doors and windows, few sensors and we are in business. Maybe someone knows the reson it's not out there?

Is there anything else you can think of, something we have technilogy for, it would be usefull but it's not there?

Karoma

A means of stabbing stupid people over the Internet. We have the Internet and we have knives. I mean, what's the hold-up, eggheads?!

MrJoeSoap

Some sort of teleportation, even for small objects.

keefg

A cure for AIDS, cancer & the common cold.
A pill to instantly stop hangovers.
And so much for the paperless office we were all told about!

Bloody lazy scientists.

Senna

Lights bulbs that last forever. Its defiantly possible and wouldn't cost a fortune. (the answer given by bulb companies) but if they sell a bulb that lasts for ever, they'll go out of business.

A-Trak

A device that lets you type with your mind. Surely it's possible.

Duiske

Cars that run on distilled water. (probably mentioned already in Conspiracy Theories).

Senna

keefg wrote: »

A pill to instantly stop hangovers.
.

About 10 years ago, there was a pill announced that would completely cure a hangover in minutes. It was stopped, because they said the negative affects of alcohol are important to stop alcohol abuse.
I was living in England when this came out, so i assume it was the English government who stopped it.

MrJoeSoap

A-Trak wrote: »

A device that lets you type with your mind. Surely it's possible.

Theres one pretty close to that, it lets you type through tiny movements in your eyes. Costs €10,000.

AlmightyCushion

A-Trak wrote: »

A device that lets you type with your mind. Surely it's possible.

All ready done but it's a little crap at the moment. It's basically a virtual keyboard and you think which way you want to move the cursor (up, down, left and right). It's pretty slow and it requires you to wear a stupid hat like thing that covers most of your head. I'll try and find a link.

ojewriej

Duiske wrote: »

Cars that run on distilled water. (probably mentioned already in Conspiracy Theories).

Car that runs on anything other than petrol, car that would be affordable, efficient and you wouldn't have to charge it every 20 miles. Surely that should be around by know

dior1catboy

Duiske wrote: »

Cars that run on distilled water. (probably mentioned already in Conspiracy Theories).

Why distilled? Would tap water not be cheaper?

Overheal

a non-profit driven economic system: build your ligthbulbs at the cost of labour and materials then when everyone has theyre feckin lightbulb you fabricate other things. Innovate!

Pills that can stop drug adiction (tobacco, cocaine etc), I'd give them to my kids before they get a chance to try anything and get hooked.


No addicts & (a lot of) petty crime = no pushers = no drugs barons = less crime.
Would put an end to a major cause of crime in one easy hit.

A-Trak

MrJoeSoap wrote: »

Theres one pretty close to that, it lets you type through tiny movements in your eyes. Costs €10,000.

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

All ready done but it's a little crap at the moment. It's basically a virtual keyboard and you think which way you want to move the cursor (up, down, left and right). It's pretty slow and it requires you to wear a stupid hat like thing that covers most of your head. I'll try and find a link.

And her I am like a sucker using my hands.

€10,000? pfft. Money well spent. I'll easily make that back in raises and bonuses due to my awesome productivity due to having loads more time as I'm not typing.

Dudess

An alarm in your umbrella that goes off as soon as you leave it behind in the cafe/restaurant/shop/surgery etc.

pd101

E-voting:D

Lawless_Samurai

ojewriej wrote: »

One example would be a central locking for houses. I mean, they can't be that difficult to sort out, i think we have the technlogy and it would be very handy, and yet - nothing. Few little engines in doors and windows, few sensors and we are in business. Maybe someone knows the reson it's not out there?

Thats pretty weird because I was talking with a friend of mine who had come up with this idea a few days ago and was trying to find out if there is already something out there. Not sure if he found any thing. Just weird he comes up with it and a few days later you come up with the same idea!!! :):D

Karoma wrote: »

A means of stabbing stupid people over the Internet. We have the Internet and we have knives. I mean, what's the hold-up, eggheads?!

Haha brilliant! I'd buy that for a dollar!!! :D

DavyD_83

A system in your umbrella that gives the user an electric shock or any other sort of ohysical punishment for being a prick and using one.
Sorry, i just hate the yokes.:mad:
Buy a jacket

MrJoeSoap

pd101 wrote: »

E-voting:D

Couldn't let that go without a ...

ojewriej

Lawless_Samurai wrote: »

Thats pretty weird because I was talking with a friend of mine who had come up with this idea a few days ago and was trying to find out if there is already something out there. Not sure if he found any thing. Just weird he comes up with it and a few days later you come up with the same idea!!! :):D

That's what i mean - it's a fairly obvous idea, not overly complicated, how come it's not out there then?

JIZZLORD

Time machine
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=54064576

Senna

ojewriej wrote: »

One example would be a central locking for houses.

how come it's not out there then?

http://www.keylesspro.com/
First item on google

leninbenjamin

those toilets that they have in Japan that basically wipe and clean your ass for you after taking a ****. seriously why aren't they the standard?

ojewriej

Senna wrote: »

http://www.keylesspro.com/
First item on google

Yeah, it's just that it's some company in states, you have to order them, then get installed, and you don't really know how reliable they are.

It should be standard by now.

froosh69

how the **** has "Jurrasic Park" not become a reality yet?

they show you how to do it in the movie.

somethin about frogs and insects caught in tree sap...

ojewriej

Senna wrote: »

http://www.keylesspro.com/
First item on google

I just noticed - it's not actually central locking, just remote locking.
Central part is the one i'm interested in.

Lawless_Samurai

ojewriej wrote: »

Central part is the one i'm interested in.

I'm probably gonna come off as a tick here but whats the difference? Like central lock all the doors at once around the house???

ojewriej

Lawless_Samurai wrote: »

I'm probably gonna come off as a tick here but whats the difference? Like central lock all the doors at once around the house???

yeah, like in the car, press the button and presto, alll the doors/windows locked.

lucyburn

Dudess wrote: »

An alarm in your umbrella that goes off as soon as you leave it behind in the cafe/restaurant/shop/surgery etc.

Execllent idea, I've already lost two umbrella's this year,by leaving them behind me on the train.

DavyD_83 wrote: »

A system in your umbrella that gives the user an electric shock or any other sort of ohysical punishment for being a prick and using one.
Sorry, i just hate the yokes.:mad:
Buy a jacket

I do have a jacket,but umbrellas are better than jackets.

Capt'n Midnight

MrJoeSoap wrote: »

Theres one pretty close to that, it lets you type through tiny movements in your eyes. Costs €10,000.

They were going to use that system on the Apollo missions to the moon, bu the astronauts kept looking all over the place turning switches on and off.

have a look at this for those of you with lazyitis http://www.inference.phy.cam.ac.uk/dasher/

Lawless_Samurai

lucyburn wrote: »

I do have a jacket,but umbrellas are better than jackets.

I know this is shocking off topic but women can be lethal walking down the street with the umbrella out!!! I suspect they do it on purpose!!! :D


Back on topic... A robot that walks your dog

Duiske

dior1catboy wrote: »

Why distilled? Would tap water not be cheaper?

It would be, but given the amount of crap (literally) in it, it would only be a matter of time before it fecked up your motor.

XchampagneX

Dudess wrote: »

An alarm in your umbrella that goes off as soon as you leave it behind in the cafe/restaurant/shop/surgery etc.

an umbrella that doesn't turn inside out whenever the wind picks up a bit!!

Pigman II

A light emitting dildo (or L.E.D. for short).

A-Trak

Pigman II wrote: »

A light emitting dildo (or L.E.D. for short).

Yes, because we've all been in that awkward situation, in the pitch black, blindly groping around for our dildo.
A light emitting dildo would of course banish this embarrising situation.

Pigman II

This is Ireland. A lot of people still have sex with the lights off.

ojewriej

Pigman II wrote: »

This is Ireland. A lot of people still have sex with the lights off.

I think it's safe to say that the ones having sex with the lights off will not be using dildos.

sebastianlieken

a meal in the form of a pill with all the necessary nutrients and vitamins for the lazy man.

Deleted User wrote: »

Pills that can stop drug adiction (tobacco, cocaine etc), I'd give them to my kids before they get a chance to try anything and get hooked.


No addicts & (a lot of) petty crime = no pushers = no drugs barons = less crime.
Would put an end to a major cause of crime in one easy hit.

who would be dealing and sellin those magical wonder pills then?....

Pigman II

Pigman II wrote: »

This is Ireland. A lot of people still have sex with the lights off.

That's because neither can be arsed to get up and turn off the light afterwards! so do it first.

Pj!

A button on the tv that you can press to sound a beep or something on the remote control so you know where the feckin thing has hidden this time.

So simple

Earthhorse

I have a few ideas for inventions which I'm surprised haven't been invented yet. I can't discuss them all here because obviously some of them are still in development and I don't want anyone to steal these ideas but the ones I can discuss I will.

p'tasteos: Basically potatos in paste form. The packaging used would be similar to that of toothpaste.

p'toastos: An extension of the p'tasteos range except this time for toast. Obviously the tagline used for both these products would be "They're p'tasty!"

But that's small time. I've come up with a superior method of seating people in the cinema. You know how it is at the minute. You arrive at the cinema and someone's in your place but you don't want to be a dick so you let them sit there and take the next available place but then a couple arrive and you're in one half of their seats so you have to bother the first guy and then he has to go and find his original seat and six minutes later everyone's playing musical chairs while the people behind you urge you to sit down so they can see Johnny Depp get directed by Tim Burton.

Well my method prevents all these problems from occurring and possibly solves a few others I hadn't thought of. Instead of getting a ticket to the cinema you get a key. The key isn't for the theatre itself but rather for your seat. All the seats are in the "up" position at the start of the day and only the key to seat, say, K11 will unlock seat K11 preventing any seating mishaps.

"Ah, but Earthhorse," I hear you say, "what if I'm late for the showing and can't find my seat. I won't just be able to sit in the nearest place available and will have to disturb the other patrons". Not so. In order to help you find your seat each key will be fitted with a small button which, when pressed, activates a powerful, blinding light helping you locate your seat and alerting other cinema goers to your arrival. The keys and seats could even be colour co-ordinated lest several people press their buttons at the same time.

"But," I hear you say again (I have pretty good speakers btw), "what if customers don't return the key?" A good point and an admitted drawback of the system. I've estimated that in order for this product to work the cost of an average cinema ticket would have to be around €500, €490 of which is a deposit. Still, other than that I think the idea's pretty flawless.

Oh and by the way, patent pending on this entire post.

Forky

Forky wrote: »

A button on the tv that you can press to sound a beep or something on the remote control so you know where the feckin thing has hidden this time.

So simple

My cordless phone has one of them on the base station, very useful! Especially if the kids have been using it.

Fredser

Some kind of magic food flavouring that would make healthy food (vegetables,fruit,yuk etc) taste like nice food (chips and burgers and curries and kebabs and sausages and beer and chocolate and ice cream and more beer and steak and cider and stuff).

July

To carry on the umbrella theme, I've wondered why someone hasn't come up with some way of invisibly shielding the rain from falling on people (me).

Like, for instance, with some computer games, when you get the 'bonus' you get this shield around you and you can't be killed while you have it.

Can we not have a shield bubble to repel the rain? Maybe it could be something to do with electormagnetism or something, I dunno. Aside: It would also be handy if it kept us from being killed too!

2 stroke

An umbrella that gives the user an electric shock every time it's used to poke out an eye.

L'prof

Digital paper, so you never have to turn another page again!

Mahatma coat

July wrote: »

To carry on the umbrella theme, I've wondered why someone hasn't come up with some way of invisibly shielding the rain from falling on people (me).

Like, for instance, with some computer games, when you get the 'bonus' you get this shield around you and you can't be killed while you have it.

Can we not have a shield bubble to repel the rain? Maybe it could be something to do with electormagnetism or something, I dunno. Aside: It would also be handy if it kept us from being killed too!

shush you :mad:

will be releasin this onto the market as soon as I have fine tuned the flight capabilities

well the landin function ( picture the mars Rover landing - thats where we're at) and no you're not completely invincible even with the shield

knird evol

Fredser wrote: »

Some kind of magic food flavouring that would make healthy food (vegetables,fruit,yuk etc) taste like nice food (chips and burgers and curries and kebabs and sausages and beer and chocolate and ice cream and more beer and steak and cider and stuff).

Yes, theyve been putting those magic food flavorings in food for the last 100 years, giving people cancer. Those ribbons people put on the back of their cars don't counteract this effect.

ojewriej

So this is what we have so far:

- Central lock for the house

- means of stabbing stupid people over the Internet

- Some sort of teleportation, even for small objects.

- A cure for AIDS, cancer & the common cold.

- A pill to instantly stop hangovers.

- paperless office

- Lights bulbs that last forever

- A device that lets you type with your mind.

- Cars that run on distilled water

- Pills that can stop drug adiction (tobacco, cocaine etc),

- An alarm in your umbrella that goes off as soon as you leave it behind in the cafe/restaurant/shop/surgery etc.

- E-voting

- Time machine

- those toilets that they have in Japan that basically wipe and clean your ass for you after taking a ****.

- "Jurrasic Park"

- an umbrella that doesn't turn inside out whenever the wind picks up a bit!!

- A light emitting dildo

- a meal in the form of a pill with all the necessary nutrients and vitamins for the lazy man.

- A button on the tv that you can press to sound a beep or something on the remote control so you know where the feckin thing has hidden this time.

- p'tasteos: Basically potatos in paste form. The packaging used would be similar to that of toothpaste.

- p'toastos: An extension of the p'tasteos range except this time for toast. Obviously the tagline used for both these products would be "They're p'tasty!"

- Some kind of magic food flavouring that would make healthy food (vegetables,fruit,yuk etc) taste like nice food

- shield bubble to repel the rain

- Digital paper


Not bad for one day of brainstorming. Few more and we can have our own little Menlo Park going.

2 stroke

A device that lets you type with your mind could get you into a lot of trouble, it can be rather difficult to control ones thoughts at times.
Better still would be a dictation machine that typed. I seem to remember that my amiga 500+ had voice recognition, what happened to this technology?